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This is the epic story of Kyle Johnsons quest to find the the holy Magic staff
 
One day, Aedan was walking  home when...
 ...a stranger in the street said "Could i have your autograph?" "Please, sign my candel " said the rather attractive female stranger   Aedan signed it, and handed it back
"Here's my autograph!" said Aedan
"To be honest, while I did want your autograph...i also..you see..i....i." the stranger hesitated! I need your help urgently! You must save us!!"
"what?howhu?"
"We need someone strong, and inteligent and mighty...you have been chosen!"
 "Well, I always felt there was something strange about me...I never thought i would be assigned a mission like this!", He lied.
"You are the One!. Our high-tech DVDcase  told us where you were."
"You must save us from Richard we dont have the power on our own"
"Very well,I suppose I'll help you"
Suddenly, Aedan was teleported into a underground lab.
"This is where we have set up our magic secret HQ HeadQuaters!
"Theres someone that wants me meet you..."
At that movement a door slid open with a funny sound...light shined from behind and a shadow stode there
"So..this is the one we are after?"
"He certainly looks as hansome as we heard"   
Kyle Johnson walked out of the light!
"Peace be with you my friend"
 Aedan was amazed!, always brillent modest, Aedan never dream of recieveing such a compliement from sexy Kyle Johnson.
"Thank you, its an honour to meet you"
"The honour is all mine"
 
"No time for that now!" said Conny. "We have work to do!"
 
(A/N this is more goth than usually but I really like it this way! You will too, because its AWESOME!)

It looked like Richard had saught Kyle Johnson out! Ever since Kyle Johnson's parents told him that he was in fact a half vampire (or a dhampire), he had feared being discovered by Richard especially after Kyle Johnson remembred the terrible secret of his past.

Conny looked with concerned at Kyle Johnson, "what is wrong Kyle Johnson?"
Kyle Johnson did not wait to answer her. He turned on one of his new found  vampire powers and listened to Richard's commands.

Richard was commanding his lackeys to search Kyle Johnson out. After villain had harshly interrogatedand tortured and flayed their skin of their bones Richard had discovred the truth behind Kyle Johnson! And he told his henchmen that he had.
"I have discovered the secret behind Kyle Johnson's percentage" Richard told his henchmen.
His lackeys smiled wickedly and took their weapons and rushed into the shopping centre leaving behind a bloody trail of dead and mutilated bodies. They had no concern for any of the shops fortunately the colour of spilled blood matched the goth clothes so they could still be resold.

Kyle Johnson and Conny and Aedan faught like lions that were fighting among each other for the last scrap of meat and mannished to defacate most of the henchmen.

But then Richard stapped forwar and spoke: "I know your secret!"
Then Aedan said: "How do you know about Kyle Johnson being a half vampire (a/n: or dhampire, really!)?"
Richard laughed and said: "you just told me! But also, I read it on Kyle Johnson's facebook!"
Kyle Johnson gasped, he thaguht that he had posted it only for friends and not public! Kyle Johnson had to be careful with his privacy settings because thye keep changing all the time (a/n: urrrgh, so annoying!)
But Richard did nothing but launching. Richard then said: but that is not what I had discovered!"
Oh no! both Aedan and Conny gasped but Kyle Johnson could only think of. They did not know the truth. That Kyle Johnson was really rapped by Richard before Kyle Johnson even knew of Richard's name!
"I know that it was you many years ago who I raped before me and did everything that I had ever wanted to do with sucgh a fine small chuck like you!We went to the park, played videogames, watched cartoons! It was great! When I raped you by touching your hand, I am truely sorry...that was an accident I admit"
Oh no! gasped Conny and she felt really bad for Kyle Johnson because even though she knew that Kyle Johnson didn't love her and was really depressed, she really didn't expect this.
And Aedan was also shocked because he knew the Sen and HK-47 knew a great secret that he didn't know, he still didn't know it was going to be this kind of secret!

Kyle Johnson felt very depressed all the sudden. He lost the will to fight and dropped his weapon before Richard and villain laughed very loudly.

Richard then said: "I have you now under my omplete spell like I had that so long ago!"

(A/N I wanted a cliff hanger here but I'm sooooo excited to share the next but of story with you! Your going to love it so much you'll print it out and try to publish it (but not without my permission!)" )
Now, how to find him? We know he has a building, but theres so many!"
 "Wait!", said Aedan.
  "I have worked it out. Remember the secret note? Its a code to tell us the address! Look, see I solved it.
 The solution was very clever, and it all made sense.
 "Wow, I could have never worked that out, well done"
 "Yes, well done indeed"
 Aedan blushed, making him look hansome.

 So they went to the base.
As they entered there was lots of gaurds.
So they swung back there trenchcoats and shot them all.
They steped over the dead bodys and made their way forwardpast the blood and guts they sprayed over the walls just moments beforeSen vometted in disgust.
"Ok, he is sure to be in the big room at the top " said HK-47 pressing the correct elivator button
The elivator went up a few floors. SUDDENLY there was a bang on the roof!
"down!" shouted Sen.
And they did. Which is just as well, because seconds later...
The hatch opened and lots of ninjas with tommy guns pirouetted down.
"oh god! What are we going to do!?" said Aedan
"We gota think fast" said HK-47.
"Ok"
"I know you dont like violence, Kyle Johnson, But you have to do this. Do it for me. please.." Said Aedan
Kyle Johnson thought about all the people he had murdered recently because of his fate.
"Ok, your right, I know we have to fight them" said Kyle Johnson who did a massive mighty super kirate kick just as the first soldier landed
 but it missed!. Fortunatly Aedan was there to catch Kyle Johnson. And did a kick-arse ninja kick in return which knocked them unconscious.
"Nice work. But its not over yet! Look!"
more fell down, but they killed them all quickly.
Ding! They had reached their floor.
"So you have come" said a voice booming from the sky
A helicopter appeared above them.
Richard laughed at them
"Ha Ha Ha Ha"
"I could gun you all down from here, but I would rather do this...personal style."
He leaped down and landed at the far side of the rooftop
"Ready?" he said, still laughing.
Kyle Johnson removed his shirt and flexed his abs. "Yes. I am ready. "
With that they leaped at eachother, metaphorical guns blazzing.
"I kill you dead"
Richard slapped Kyle Johnson in the mouth
Blood splashed onto the floor.
Kyle Johnson fell backwards in pain punching a few times before crashing to the ground.
"Ha Ha Ha Ha" laughed Richard
"You could never have defeated me, so why did you even try?"
"I had too, for all that is good and just in the world."
"Well now you will die. Goodbye."
Richard leaned over Kyle Johnson holding his gun.

"Quick Kyle Johnson use this!" said Aedan ,chucking a nearby carpet towards Kyle Johnson.
Kyle Johnson grabbed it and chucked it towards Richard hard, knocking him backwards....off the edge of the skyscrapper!
"Goodbye, Richard have a nice fall!"
"ARrrrrgggg"
SPLAT!
 
"We are safe now, he fell to certain doom."
Aedan and HK-47 got out from the toliet where they were crying in fear. "Thank you, you saved us all"
"Dont mention it."

So they left the tower and went home. They lived happily ever after and had lots of kids.
The End

 
 
Once apon a time...
 

Once upon a time, after my great adventures, I was wondering what to do that week. I had picked up my life from where I left it and wanted to make something from it.He wanted to make my father proud. Then all the sudden a strange woman appeared on my doorstep. She was hiden beneath a long cloak and had long brown nails on her fingers. Her dirty hair fluished down from beneath the cloak and she had glowing eyes! I thought I remembered seeing her in my dreams the past couple of weeks, almost as if it was a premonition
"You are not who you think you are!" said the strange woman.
"What do you mean?" I said.
"You are not who you think you are," she said again with a mysterious crackling voice like a bad radio transmission.
"I still don't understand you?" I said.
"Here, take this," she said and gave I an rolled up paper.
"Take this and give it to your parents or guardian, they will know what to do with it!"
And with that she disappeared before my eyes!

I was confused but thought that I had to do something. But rather than going to my parents or guardian, I decided to show it to HK-47.
"Oh no," said HK-47, "you must forget about this!"
"Why?" I enquired,  "what do you know?!"
"I... I can't tell you. My dear Kyle Johnson, I didn't think it would be this soon!"
"What?!" I yelled, "are you keeping things away from me?!"
"It's .... it's for your own good! You cannot know this!" said HK-47 and before I could do anything, HK-47 had escaped my grasp.
"No! Dammit! When will I ever know the truth?!"
I was feeling depressed. One of my best friends abandoned and betrayed me. It hurt.I cut himself to make the pain go away, but it only helped a bit. So I wanted to find Conny. After their adventure, I and Conny had been spending a lot of time together. I kind of started to like her.
So I went to Conny and told the whole story. She listened to me without saying a single word.
Then she said: "WTFOMMGBBQ, this is,like, serious!!!"
And I said: I know! Do you know a way to find out what is happening? Why is everyone hiding things from me?!"
Conny sighed and said: "You have always been special, I and not just to me."
"How do you know that?"
Conny looked at the Star Of David that I had received and said: "it kind of looks like the Magic staff, doesn't it?"
"When I squint my eyes, my god you're right!"
"Whatever it is, I can recognise it quite well. And I think," Conny said, "that perhaps the mysterious woman wanted you to find something inside of you.
"Inside? Like my heart?"
"No, don't be silly, like a mamory. Think about it, if your parents lied to you and now HK-47 doesn't want to talk to you about your background, perhaps there is a hidden memory in your head!"
Conny's logic was flawless. So I had to try it!

So I concentrated on the object. immeditately <I> felt drawn into it. It stated ouit as a vague, fuzzy thing like when you wear glasses and there is a lot of moisture in the air and you see a dog|a cat|some girls yayas|a braciole in the distance.
But then it turned out that there was a secret memory, hidden beneath the vail layer of unclairity.

And within that memory, a burning figure appeared. It was Grandiose! In hell...

I was confused. I didn't think that memory would be in there, and yet it was there, burning like the fires of a bonfire and the centre of the earth.

Fortunately HK-47 worked at a newspaper nowadays and he used the archieve of the newspaper to find out home turf of Grandiose's thugs.
Their search led to a lesbian night club in the darkiest and stormiest part of Northsdale. I was a little hesitant to go. It was rather scary and it was dark and stomy in that secting of Northsdale. But the courage in me was greater than my fear because with my Windy things I should be able to accomplish anything, right, I thought to myself.
And HK-47 would join me.

So not to fall out of fashion we both stripped and donned their most gothyest clothing. I had to admit that HK-47 looked kind of sexy in that outfit of his. But I didn't dare to comment on that (I had only just discovered I am bi, and I was a little angxious over that. I wans't sure if my othre friends would accept that!.
I instead poored down my soul into my make-up. I bore gorgeous magenta finger nails with black streaking strips and gave HK-47 matching treatment. HK-47 gorgeous eyes met mine and for a moment we were both swimming in a pool made of a incandesent combination of their eyes colours. It was romance we knew, but we didn't know whether it was a forbidden one or not!

Oh hell, Grandiose could wait. Now I looked upon HK-47 with lust filling my wing dang doodle . Grandiose could be taking over the world for what I cared, now it should be all about me and HK-47.

But little did I know that in fact HK-47 had been lusting after me as well! With force and lust HK-47 threw me onto the telephone booth  and thrusted himself right into me. I moaned. We came. Then we went off and defeated Grandiose.
So we snuck into the Grandiose's lair. It was dark and there were horrofic things on the walls like drawings of skulls and suffering people who were beaing tortured in oil and bombarded with multipronged lances.
Through the dark and dank corridors of the lair's dungeons we went with outmost silence and skill. We sneaked past all the guards who had been turned into horrible demons by Grandiose's new invention. And this would also happen to the whole world if they wouldn't be able to steal the Magic staff from Grandiose's hands!
They went down the corridors and up the large majestic stairways made of bones and diamonds sprinkled with saffron.. One of the corridors led towards a great hall where in the middle of the hall stood a pedestaldripping in blood and guts and kidneys (and other organs) with a treassure chest on top and on that a red velvet pillow upon which laid a white silk finely woven cloth. And on that laid the Magic staff.

I knew that I had to use all of the Windy things (which I learned from Kyle Johnson) to get the Magic staff but it would endanger them all if he didnt keep his cool. Conny inhaled firmly and wondered if I could pull it off. HK-47 stood ready with his weapon in his hand and Connys boobies in the other. I concentrated firmly and then carefully but powerfully unleashed my Windy things. 

It worked! Kyle Johnson was amazed at my skill! The protections around the Magic staff disintegrated like snow before the plower. It was amazing how my's use of Windy things was effective against Grandiose's  powers.
Unfortunately for our fearless home boys, it wasn't enough

"Stop!" growled a evil voice. Everyone slowly spun around to face the entrance of the hall where the voice came from.
It was Grandiose! And he looked even less humane as before. He had used the power of the Magic staff to transform into a ghastly corpse of a monster.
"Ha! Are you surprised by my new looks?" He said. "It is amazing! The powers I have now are beyond your comprehension!"
"My comprehension is really good," I retorted and Kyle Johnson and friends looked proud.
"Hahaha of course yours is. But are you able to comprehend the future of this world? I bet you aren't that smart after all. I will rule the world now, you see and there is nothing you can do to stop me! Even when Kyle Johnson taught you evreything he knows!"
"But," said Grandiose with a lower tone, "even though you are not as smart as I am, you are surprisingly capable so I wish to make this offer: join me and we can rule this world together!"
"No" said Kyle Johnson!
"Think about it, you can now still save your friends! Make them stop mutate ebefore I release my powers!"
I saw Kyle Johnson becoming frightened. I knew he wanted to keep Conny, Richard, Sen and HK-47 alive for sex but I could not get Grandiose get away with it! But then I remembered: Grandiose no longer had the Magic staff! He was powerless!
But as if Grandiose could read my mind, Grandiose spoke: "Oh and your scheme to steal the Magic staff? I no longer need it! I have gained all the power from it that I need in order to mutate everyone in the whole world! But not that you even considered going against me, I will destroy you. Such a shame, we could be such good...friends." (A/N by which he means banging budies)
"Richard would never be friends with you!" said Sen
I thought she was right, but then again, Grandiose did look mighty sexy.
"It is too late now anyway, said Grandiose, my plan is active now and I will give you the best place to enjoy it: from your prison cell!"
Grandiose laughed and said to his guards: "lead them to my sex dungeon where you will suffer for all eternity in agony and pleasure.

But I had not forgotten Kyle Johnson's Windy things. With the speed and might that I learned from his previous adventures, he jumped and unleashed the Windy things.
Grandiose had not expected that. He thought he had trapped me and my friends and managed to demoralise them so much they would not resist.
"Nooos!" Grandiose said. His guards did not know what to do. Their leader was too weak against this onslaught. What could they do against that sort of might? So they all fled!
"Argh, noooo!" Grandiose extrapolated, "I was soo close to ultimate power!"
Seeing my succesfully attack Grandiose, Kyle Johnson, Sen and Richard also attacked Grandiose!

"Arigh, no, noooo!"
"I will unleash my final power!" Grandiose said and raised his arms to the sky and started hissing an evil curse.
But Kyle Johnson was too quick. He ran towards Grandiose and hit Grandiose in the tummy. He was knocked out instantly. Everyone was happy and everyone was cheering for Kyle Johnson who had avoided the apocalypse! Kyle Johnson thanked me for my inspiration and actions. And now we all went home and wait until our next adventure!