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Author Topic: Books are Fun!  (Read 21110 times)

Nyxalinth

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Books are Fun!
« on: February 14, 2012, 09:51:36 pm »
I have the following titles:

My friend the Desert Tortoise Brute
The Uses of Lies
Waking up With Humans
The Pregnancies of (insert dwarfette name here)

Most of them seem to be self-indulgent and occasionally vicious.  What are your best books?
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

Kylarus

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2012, 10:19:47 pm »
The library currently kept in Onecade "LuteNest:"
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Quote from: Friendstrange on August 01, 2012, 08:58:29 pm
You mean the ability to have endless training dummies, a carpet of eyestalks and tendrills, and a plant that both makes for some good grizzled sea man hard liquor AND the ability to turn your dwarves into the Night´s Watch...not reward enough?

Lord Seo

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #2 on: February 14, 2012, 10:30:08 pm »
the best I've had so far is

"Zinc is the Way", which the necromancer followed up with "More Book"
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NinjaBoot

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2012, 10:33:12 pm »
I'm beginning to wonder if we will have to built libraries for our "esteemed" nobles to peruse their wonderful books.  This would set up a whole new industry in itself.. [P]rint Books. 

(This could also enable nobles to have a higher chance of being/becoming necromancers)
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twilightdusk

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2012, 10:39:13 pm »
Is there a way to make books in forts right now? If not there should be at some point, I want to make a library for my Book Keeper to have his office in.
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Quote from: CinnibarMan on December 04, 2010, 05:58:21 am
A man would see that as a difficult challenge.
An elf would see that and despair.
A dwarf would see that and say, "Bring it on."

Bronze Dog

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #5 on: February 14, 2012, 10:42:54 pm »
One I got was something like "The Secrets of Bear Monsters." Written by, of course, a Bear Monster FB/Titan. Who got to declare himself lord of his civ by force of argument.
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Starver

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #6 on: February 14, 2012, 10:49:57 pm »
Quote from: Bronze Dog on February 14, 2012, 10:42:54 pm
One I got was something like "The Secrets of Bear Monsters." Written by, of course, a Bear Monster FB/Titan. Who got to declare himself lord of his civ by force of argument.
His forceful argument being that only he had The Right To Bear Arms?
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Qmarx

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #7 on: February 14, 2012, 10:59:23 pm »
A necromancer's autobiography was titled "Time Laughs", which is pretty good.
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Nyxalinth

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #8 on: February 14, 2012, 11:52:10 pm »
Quote from: NinjaBoot on February 14, 2012, 10:33:12 pm
I'm beginning to wonder if we will have to built libraries for our "esteemed" nobles to peruse their wonderful books.  This would set up a whole new industry in itself.. [P]rint Books. 

(This could also enable nobles to have a higher chance of being/becoming necromancers)

Well, if the random book generator created one called Twilight, it's going into the magma :D
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

Lord Dakoth

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #9 on: February 15, 2012, 12:30:05 am »
My favorite book is entitled "Dwarves: Fact or Fiction?"
It was written by - you guessed it - a dwarf.
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Untelligent

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #10 on: February 15, 2012, 12:32:02 am »
My favorites so far:


"The Dwarves Washed"

"Can the Hyena Devil Save the World?"

"The Wizard's Guide to Annihilation"
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regardless, the slime shooter will be completed, come hell or high water, which are both entirely plausible setbacks at this point.

twilightdusk

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #11 on: February 15, 2012, 12:37:30 am »
Quote from: Lord Dakoth on February 15, 2012, 12:30:05 am
My favorite book is entitled "Dwarves: Fact or Fiction?"
It was written by - you guessed it - a dwarf.

Well, clearly it's talking about myths related to dwarves, and if they're true or not. For example:

A novice dwarf with a copper axe can easily take on a swarm of goblins - total truth.
Dwarves are a cowardly race that hides in the ground because they fear sunshine - False false false! how do people think this!?
« Last Edit: February 15, 2012, 07:18:55 am by twilightdusk »
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Quote from: CinnibarMan on December 04, 2010, 05:58:21 am
A man would see that as a difficult challenge.
An elf would see that and despair.
A dwarf would see that and say, "Bring it on."

FoiledFencer

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #12 on: February 15, 2012, 05:49:06 am »
Quote
"The Wizard's Guide to Annihilation"

I love it!

I got:

Traditional Afterlife

The Afterlife: Common Practice

Better Extinction

Tekkud Shakenglazed and other Travesties

The Tower Musical

The Book for the Beginning Practicioner

- Some of those sound genuinely handy, if you ask me...

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"Lithrushâst Kúdlizat: Fetidfur, the slick notch, a grizzly bear leather loincloth. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is studded with zinc, decorated with grizzly bear leather and encircled with bands of grizzly bear leather. This object menaces with spikes of grizzly bear leather."

Frying Doby

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #13 on: February 15, 2012, 05:53:12 am »
 "Give me the book"
 "First the Master, then the world"
 "Misery and other Travesties"
 "Start your day with Basko Thirsthaunted the Trifiling Nightmare".
Written by squirrel or otter demons.

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Garath

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Re: Books are Fun!
« Reply #14 on: February 15, 2012, 07:17:42 am »
"The wizards guide to clapcraft" (think it's a town)
"Dying: Before and After"
"The Dwarf Ever Onwards" (written by a dwarf necromancer)
"Strapping of Oni Trussedprairy"
"Give me Oblivion"
"To The Noble Disemboweler"
"Victory By The Book"
"It Must Have Been The Humans"
"The Book For Everyone"
"Better Book"

then a series it seems:
The Tower, My Love
The Tower, Abrigded
More Tower
It Must Have Been The Tower
Errors In More Tower
The Tower: Problems And Solutions
The Future Of The Tower
Common Sense Tower
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Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
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And then everyone melted.
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