Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Poll

Wait for Next Version, Use current (.40.24,) or use older release (.34.11?)

Wait for the next release. I want usable mugs damn it!
- 55 (71.4%)
We can use the current one. I like the big trees and slightly smarter dorfs.
- 17 (22.1%)
I'll take .34.11 thanks. I want to know I'll get to kill things for sure.
- 5 (6.5%)

Total Members Voted: 77


Pages: 1 ... 354 355 [356] 357 358 ... 815

Author Topic: [34.11] Spearbreakers - It shudders and begins to move  (Read 2178134 times)

Mr Frog

  • Bay Watcher
  • A respectable sort of psychopath
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5325 on: September 11, 2012, 08:47:22 pm »

But someone is WRONG on the INTERNET! [/xkcd]

Yeah, (@Talvi) should probably take that one to PMs.
Logged
A great human twisted into humanoid form. It has an emaciated appearance and it squirms and fidgets. Beware its bronyism!

Spawn of Holistic, and other mods

My tileset. Because someone asked. (Now with installation instructions!)
I so want your spawn babies

Aseaheru

  • Bay Watcher
  • Cursed by the Elves with a title.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5326 on: September 11, 2012, 08:54:24 pm »

Oh god aseaheru you got me stuck on that uglydance thing for a good few minutes


and yeah... Humans are cool like that.

im smiling now........ you might want to run now.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Logged
Highly Opinionated Fool
Warning, nearly incapable of expressing tone in text

Hanslanda

  • Bay Watcher
  • Baal's More Evil American Twin
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5327 on: September 11, 2012, 08:57:40 pm »

Aseaheru, you're... You're a little unhinged, aren't you? :P
Logged
Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
He's fucking with us.

Reudh

  • Bay Watcher
  • Perge scelus mihi diem perficias.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5328 on: September 11, 2012, 08:59:16 pm »

Splint, I love it. I'm so gonna tie it into my next update.

@Hansy

No more than the rest of bay12, babydoll

Xahnel

  • Bay Watcher
  • Hail the King
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5329 on: September 11, 2012, 09:05:47 pm »

Excellent work, Splint, perfect representation. I'll be texting you to discuss the underplot there.
Logged

Talvieno

  • Bay Watcher
  • Hello, Death. How's life?
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5330 on: September 11, 2012, 09:57:00 pm »

Quote
[...] creativity is technically non-existent [...]

Before I attempt to rip this to shreds, please define what you mean by 'creativity' so that I know exactly how flawed this argument is and in what ways.
:D :D :D
I love debates. :D Yay!


By the way, Splint, great story post. :) It got a little confusing to read at some places, but I still found it somewhat amusing...

Also... for some reason, Reudh's character reminds me of this guy:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: September 11, 2012, 10:14:35 pm by Talvieno »
Logged
Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Jack Magnus

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5331 on: September 12, 2012, 02:16:45 am »

Two things (one or more of which may not make much sense due to my lack of sleep):

One, I'm currently in the middle of re-reading the Battlefailed series, and apparently my brain can only support holding detailed information on one major plot at once, so I've basically forgotten everything in Spearbreakers (or I may be tired, either way). I'll have to reread the Spearbreakers thread once I get myself up to date with... whatever the fourth installation of Battlefailed is called. After I read Hellcannon.

Two, you guys are awesome at writing. That's all I'm really capable of saying right now since my brain is basically fried from being too tired and reading too much.

Oh, and I found dorf!Reudh getting kicked in the "rock nuts" hilarious, as well as Splint's random reaction to the statue of him eating lunch.

Now I'm going to go to bed before my brain shuts down completely. Or keep playing Minecraft, either one is equally likely at this point.
Logged

Splint

  • Bay Watcher
  • War is a valid form of diplomacy.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5332 on: September 12, 2012, 03:27:45 am »

To clear things up:

-Splint is in fact hearing things. This place or the stresses of running it are starting to undermine his sanity. It may or may not be Stova haunting him, or him simply thinking it is and he's made some kind of imaginary friend of sorts that keeps him focused on whatever it is he's doing, in this case he was going to come out about how he feels about rose and give her something nice to boot, the statue just kinda frazzled him a bit so the voice decided it need to give him a nudge ("FOCUS.")

I based his reaction off of what mine actually was when Reudh told us about that thing, because I put up the majority of the statues around the fortress and I never even noticed there was one of my dwarf eating lunch.

-Reudh Took some barrels of booze when he became overseer and stashed them in his room. These were barrels Mr Frog had spiked during an expieriment and forgot about due to the general mess going on with the Contractors that were on site at the time. The drugs or whatever the hell was in these barrels was the cause of Reudh's general lapses in judgment and made him EXTREMLY paranoid and to make assumptions. Player!Reudh ok'd this interpretation.

Wether or not he'll improve at all now that his dorf's mind altering substances are gone is up to him, though at this point I don't think the Army cares if he was drugged or not and the only thing keeping them from skinning his ass for crippling Sus II and killing Tahu is Fischer, and considering he was directly responsible for crippling one of her men and killing another (He was the one who issued the lever order that went forgotten after all,) not to mention the two workers who died because of him, she's probably seriously considering turning a blind eye and letting what happens happen.

Reudh

  • Bay Watcher
  • Perge scelus mihi diem perficias.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5333 on: September 12, 2012, 06:08:21 am »

30th Galena 208

I went to my darling Rose today. She looked beauteous as usual... and she invited me to her room!

I did not expect her to be so forward, and so I blushed furiously, of course! The lovely creature invited me to her room... so how could I say no?

So, I sat there with her. I was a little worried that she used my hair as her amulet.

"Darling, Beauty... I am forever in thrall to you, as you know... but why on earth would you take my hair for your amulet string? I thought it a little strange."

At that, Rose took her helmet off. Her beautiful locks tumbled, or rather, didn't tumble out, as there were nearly none.

"I shaved my head so the helmet would fit better, and I figured 'why let my hair go to waste?' so I used it to make a string."

Still beautiful, the creature was. I suppose I could grow to love the pixie do.

"By the way... sir... I need to tell you. I know you love me dearly--"

Oh, the JOY i felt! My heart fluttered, my brain smiled! Rose... Rose loves me!

"Wedding preperations must begin at once! I cannot wait, my love! We must marry tomorrow!"

Rose got a strange, yet still beautiful look on her face.
"If you'd let me finish, sir. I know you love me dearly, but frankly, I do not love you. I thought you were merely a mad stalker, and then you gave me this lovely jewel. That at least has elevated you above stalker, to 'creepy suitor'. All due respect, Sir."

My heart... it sank so low I am sure it fell out of my shorts.

"But... but... you accepted my present! I thought you... I thought you loved me in return!"

must not weep, must not weep...

At that exact moment, who should burst through and interrupt the tete-a-tete my flower and I were having, but that varlet Splint? He has been creeping around an awful lot. Not the behaviour I, an OVERSEER would expect from his Count.

"Please, Rose... don't call me sir. Call me Reudh. You don't even have to call me Lord."

I looked back and forth. Why... Rose's shadow was moving.

Splint looked... furious. Rose hopped up and started quietly talking to Splint. MY SWEET!
WHY...

They...

Are they together...?

Oh.


OH.

The white-hot rage that consumes me oh, I feel I may shatter from its force! I feel my blood pressure skyrocket, as she leans close to that perfidious rat and natters in his grizzled, misshapen ears. What a foul creature he is. I do not know how she bears to touch him so.

"What... What are you two doing, you heathens? Unhand him, my sweet! Countula, touch her not!"

((Note his speech has gotten horribly grandiloquent and wanky, much like mine does when I am not in my right mind))

"I swear on Spearbreakers, I'll have you both flayed if you don't part! You're plotting against me, they're all plotting against me! I haven't a frund in a wurrrl!" I screamed.

I braced myself against the wall.... I couldn't come at the idea of hurting my sweet... but I was... so... angry. I bet I could take Countula in a fight.

Then, oh, blast it! Then, Rose grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me. Curses upon curses. I motioned to strike her, then thought better of it.
"Get a hold of yourself, man!" she shouted.

"Get off me, you foul hoyden!" I shoved her hard. Harder than I thought I was capable of. I mean, she a well trained soldier and I a weedy civilian, and I sent her sprawling.

And then I felt all my senses go to naught.
It was like I was in a shroud. I couldn't see. I couldn't hear. I couldn't touch. I couldn't think. I couldn't BREATHE. Something had wrapped itself around my head so effectively it felt it was IN me. In my mouth, in my nose, in my ears. Blocking every possible interface I had with the world.

Just on the edge of my hearing, I heard "Halen, get off him!"

At once the oppression of what presumably was Halen vanished. I blearily shook my head and felt my brain run a diagnostic on my speech.
"Glarfunkbla?" I croaked; just in time to see Rose thump me heartily in the face with her gauntleted hand. Nothing broke, but blimey, it stung! It hurt. It cruciated. It pained. It ached.

I grabbed hold of the table just in time to see that rat-fink Splint lean back and launch his foot toward my Southern Necessity and


CRUNCH

OH.
M-MMY...
oH....
Gghh.

The entire room turned red for an instant, then all the colours curiously muted. The bastard was saying something about rock nuts. No doubt he enjoyed the contact. They all hate me. I didn't do anything. They hate me. Why do they hate me? They hatehatehatehatehate me...

hatehatehatepainohgodthepainhatehatehate

I fell sideways and just whimpered for the pain to go away. It obliterates all thought. Is this what they feel when they transform into Spawn? I hope I am not transforming into Spawn.

I hope I am transforming into spawn! I hope I am!

SPAWNSpawnSpAwnmeSpawNsPwanStOvaHolLISSTiIIKdddeeettTTeectiveeEssfoootsoftaSoFtaAssshhhhSssaaAAABeBBBErr.

Then I'll rend them in twain with my sexy claws! My sexual claws! My... what.

And then the world completely went grey, and I could not remember a thing after... But oh, my sweet. I shall never see her again...

Talvieno

  • Bay Watcher
  • Hello, Death. How's life?
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5334 on: September 12, 2012, 06:16:53 am »

Heheheh. I greatly enjoy reading these updates. Lol at Reudh wanting to become a "sexy Spawn".
Logged
Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Reudh

  • Bay Watcher
  • Perge scelus mihi diem perficias.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5335 on: September 12, 2012, 06:48:15 am »

Did you get the reference to the Room?

I reckon if I can be arsed, I will make the final scene with Rose, Reudh and Splint replacing Lisa, Johnny and Mark.

"Hahahaha. What a story, Splint."



25th Limestone 208

I... Apologise. My last outburst was... rather strange. Apparently I had been sampling some of Mr Frog's 'special brew'... and my mind was affected as a result. I did not intend to piss off half the fort... but it appears so I have. My first tenure as an overseer and the fort hates me. Even Fischer is beginning to turn, even as she was the last one to treat me neutrally.

Still, he could not help but laugh when she saw me in hospital, with the condition (Simon Tam told me) "prick-gone-home-itis".

Oh, well. I still feel a niggling whenever I see Rose and Splint... but I suppose they were justified in putting me down. I remember nought of the last few months... I remember getting the job, and a little ways into my reign. I ought to read my journal.

Reudh's journal trails off on this page.

Oh...
Dear lord. It seems I was a foolish cad. I...
I don't think an apology will cut it. I'd best live out the rest of my tenure being as meek and smart as possible.
Splint hasn't yet stopped referring to me as "Sexy Spawn". It's beginning to irritate me. Perhaps something I said.

Anyway, migrants arrived today. Six of them. Didn't catch their names, but three of them were useless dissectors. Nothing else of note happened.

Sus

  • Bay Watcher
  • For ‼SCIENCE‼!
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5336 on: September 12, 2012, 07:27:25 am »

Yeah, I figured that out after I named her. However, Tolkien also used it for his "Vanyar", which are basically the minor gods of the world (Manwë, Varda, Melkor, etc.), with Eru Ilúvatar being the "creator god" who reigned over everything, including the Vanyar. "Vanyar" is the pluralization of "Vanya". Maybe it's a bit pretentious, but in my defense, I didn't realize where I'd gotten the name from until afterwards. :P Still, "Vanyar" and "Vanyar" are both phrased in one of Tolkien's elvish tongues - I can't remember which, exactly, but I'm pretty sure it was Quenya. So it's still elvish. It's just Cryllic, too.

Edit: By the way, it's not solely a male's name in real life, either. I recall that in Bulgaria it's also a woman's name (not just Bulgaria, it's just that I remember that someone there had that name (long story)).
Incidentally, it's also the codename of the Tsar Bomba. :P
Logged
Certainly you could argue that DF is a lot like The Sims, only... you know... with more vomit and decapitation.
If you launch a wooden mine cart towards the ocean at a sufficient speed, you can have your entire dwarf sail away in an ark.

Xahnel

  • Bay Watcher
  • Hail the King
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5337 on: September 12, 2012, 10:26:53 am »

Hilarious, absolutely hilarious. Art request, reudh the sexy spawn. I'm gonna write up the full journal for rose today, and you guys will have it tomorrow.
How rose should act in story: now that the cause of the creepiness has been removed, and reudh is back to normal, she should be a staunch supporter of the newly re-sane overseer. That includes force feeding mystery brew to anyone who doubts THAT was why he was nutty. Lets say she searched the booze, and found more dwarven wine that received the same treatment. She should also volunteer to give Mr Frog a solid boot to the rear or lizard nuggets, as she would call them. I'm sure everyone in the fort is sick of wondering if their booze is gonna make them think they have flaming snakes coming out of their nose and trying to eat their face. Then she'll suggest putting a guard on each part of the food and booze production process.
And if Mr Frog is caught, she gets to deliver a twirling wedgie, i.e., give him a wedgie, then start spinning him over her head by his undergarments.
Logged

Talvieno

  • Bay Watcher
  • Hello, Death. How's life?
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5338 on: September 12, 2012, 11:16:33 am »

@Sus: Lol - I had no idea. That's awesome, though.

Hilarious, absolutely hilarious. Art request, reudh the sexy spawn. I'm gonna write up the full journal for rose today, and you guys will have it tomorrow.
How rose should act in story: now that the cause of the creepiness has been removed, and reudh is back to normal, she should be a staunch supporter of the newly re-sane overseer. That includes force feeding mystery brew to anyone who doubts THAT was why he was nutty. Lets say she searched the booze, and found more dwarven wine that received the same treatment. She should also volunteer to give Mr Frog a solid boot to the rear or lizard nuggets, as she would call them. I'm sure everyone in the fort is sick of wondering if their booze is gonna make them think they have flaming snakes coming out of their nose and trying to eat their face. Then she'll suggest putting a guard on each part of the food and booze production process.
And if Mr Frog is caught, she gets to deliver a twirling wedgie, i.e., give him a wedgie, then start spinning him over her head by his undergarments.
@Xahnel: I can't decide if you're serious or just trolling, but I'm leaning towards the latter - I find it hard to believe you're serious. If you're trolling, you're somewhat successful, as I have quite a bit to say on the matter. Also, I don't think Splint would consider trolling acceptable in this thread... It invites (and really, begs for) arguments to begin. Then again, it's equally possible you're not trolling. Or that I misunderstand you and you're just joking, but it seemed pretty serious, the way you said it.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2012, 01:37:52 pm by Talvieno »
Logged
Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Splint

  • Bay Watcher
  • War is a valid form of diplomacy.
    • View Profile
Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5339 on: September 12, 2012, 01:02:29 pm »

I don't think I can draw a sexy spawn.... That's something even my brain doesn't want to try and imagine, and given what can pop into my head on a whim, that's saying something.

And while it'd be unlikely Mr Frog would get caught anyway, that batch was spiked and forgotten about. I don't think he would have wanted an overseer being a test subject during thier term of service on the long term effects of cave moss and bloodthorn powder, since I think even he has a sense of self preservation that that would have worked against  (I don't think anyone wants to join Ashsaber or Softa in the holding cells :P) I find the idea of him being on the recieving end of a rather violent wedgie humerous. That being said that won't happen.

So we finally closed on the damned house. I'm only even able to reply right now because I'm kinda of out of it and drinking my wakeup glass of soda (Coffee is fine and all but too bitter for my tastes.)
Pages: 1 ... 354 355 [356] 357 358 ... 815