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Wait for Next Version, Use current (.40.24,) or use older release (.34.11?)

Wait for the next release. I want usable mugs damn it!
- 55 (71.4%)
We can use the current one. I like the big trees and slightly smarter dorfs.
- 17 (22.1%)
I'll take .34.11 thanks. I want to know I'll get to kill things for sure.
- 5 (6.5%)

Total Members Voted: 77


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Author Topic: [34.11] Spearbreakers - It shudders and begins to move  (Read 2178093 times)

aussieevil

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5370 on: September 13, 2012, 01:58:11 pm »

AussieEvil's lab journal

(various names of animals are written here, followed by the results observed when mixed with the blood-rain. Most say "clumped".)

While I was transferring more blood-rain to my personal lab to conduct more clump tests, I noticed one dwarf was staring at me. I fear further investigation by him might lead to accusations against me. I have no choice but to seal up the lab for a short period of time and return to my "everyday" job as a plain, simple miner and keep an eye out for this stranger. If he begins sniffing around, my livelihood-- no, my life may soon be in jeopardy.
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Henry Freeman no get out of here fast as you can...

soulslicerjames

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5371 on: September 13, 2012, 04:07:26 pm »

Man, I could not have picked a worse day to miss on this thread.  Would a "sexy spawn" be better or worse than a Manamaid?  Either way, there is no chance of dorf!Ruedh ever living this down.
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Talvieno

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5372 on: September 13, 2012, 04:42:08 pm »

Lol, Jack. :P That was a good prank, yeah. One thing, though - Reudh is still acting semi-weird, even when not hopped up on stuff. He asked Rochia (yay, she finally got a mood, she's been around since my year) on a date almost immediately after meeting her, seemingly thinking he was in love... lol



And soulslicerjames...
Man, I could not have picked a worse day to miss on this thread.  Would a "sexy spawn" be better or worse than a Manamaid?  Either way, there is no chance of dorf!Ruedh ever living this down.
A Sexy Spawn would be better. At the worst it might make you vomit. It would not make your eyes bleed, and nor would it make you lose consciousness.

[Image/code soon to follow]

lateedit while compiling the pdf (11/15/2012): It was going to be a manamaid spoiler pic, but I apparently didn't get around to it.

relateedit: Nevermind, scroll down.
« Last Edit: November 15, 2012, 01:18:48 pm by Talvieno »
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Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Splint

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5373 on: September 13, 2012, 04:49:23 pm »

@ Talvieno - Parasol won't go down that easily, even with all the info Ballpoint has. It was honestly blind luck and a coin toss on my end that got them so much information; Ballpoint is still as you can tell more heavily reliant on rapid attacks and light infantry compared to Parasol, which also makes heavy use of noncompany personel along with its own contractors, which Ballpoint doesn't do.

And yes, they know how to really mess shit up. Just Ecem, Bugi, and Aret were often enough to crush entire sieges if they neglected to bring mounts, often sending trolls in several direction after applying thier halberds to them. Now that they have guns, very large knives and generally what amounts to industrial scaled buzzsaws they can do even more damage. And I figured I'd kill off Koth and Aret, since they don't do as much story wise as Ecem or Bugi and overall don't seem too important to the plot other than thier relation to Ecem and Bugi. I just haven't come up with a suitable way to kill Aret yet.

@ Jack and Aussie - Good work you two. After having my ass kicked by a tile floor that was badly made, coming home to funny stuff helps take away the horrible aching in my legs and hands.

Jack Magnus

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5374 on: September 13, 2012, 05:03:12 pm »

@Talvieno: Yeah, I figured dorf!Reudh is still acting a bit off (although his instantaneous falling in love could just be related to his stalkerish tendencies, I suppose), but he's still far more clear headed now than he was before. Or, at least both myself and my dwarf think so :p

What's funny is I thought of the "sexy spawn" statue prank when I was half asleep. Maybe I should focus on creative writing when I'm almost drooling on my keyboard tired more often...
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Splint

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5375 on: September 13, 2012, 05:06:46 pm »

I'd say he's a little freaked out that he didn't notice he was drugged off his ass and got half the fortress or more pissed at him (after all, if you're continually consuming a drugged drink while still under said drugs' influences....)

Talvieno

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5376 on: September 13, 2012, 05:14:49 pm »

[Image/code soon to follow] (stop ninja'ing, guys. lol)

On Manamaids
By some blind dead guy
In the raws, manamaids are part human, part cow, and part walrus. They're roughly the height of a human, and they have the head of a human, but the resemblance to humankind stops there.* Their arms are literally belarded with hanging rings of fat... in fact, they're half ultra-blubbery flippers, just barely having enough of what amounts to fingers at the end to enable them to wield heavy bashing weapons like great mauls and warhammers, which they use with a vengeance, being very, very strong. Below the arms, they are completely lacking in extremeties, instead having blubbery, disgusting flesh, overly visible reproductive/waste organs, and giant flippers instead of legs and feet, which are oddly enough capable of moving them about at half the speed of a dwarf. Their deadliest attack consists of actually sitting on their opponent, squashing them flat. As they lube themselves up before battle (in some sort of bizarre sex ritual), the poor sot they sit on is generally squashed out from underneath the blubbery mammal like soap from beneath a person's foot. It also causes massive internal injuries and permanent mental scarring.
*Note - most of these observations are second hand. No one, not even those with the most extreme fetishes, has been able to look at a manamaid for more than two successive seconds.

Their worst attack, however, is when they "bust a sexy move". This generally involves some form of sexual, "provocative" dancing... and often the temporary removal of one or more articles of clothing. Witnesses to this event are generally briefly knocked unconscious, their brains refusing to (or being incapable of managing to) process something so hideously grotesque. This loss of neural activity generally coincides with bleeding from the eyes, which, if not treated, can, in the most severe cases, lead to the death of the victim. The latter case is preferable, as the victim likely welcomes even Hell as an alternative to having that image permanently etched into their mind, seeing it at every waking moment. Those who do survive... well... They don't really care about anything anymore.

...Not even booze.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: September 13, 2012, 05:23:40 pm by Talvieno »
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Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Splint

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5377 on: September 13, 2012, 05:18:45 pm »

Best fucking thing I've read all day.

Xahnel

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5378 on: September 13, 2012, 05:24:37 pm »

That just looks like a very overweight Ariel.

Sorry, but that just doesn't scare or sicken me at all.

Slenderman has ruined all other frightening things for me. I'm even watching amnesia videos with apathy. Custom stories, which are far worse than the normal game.
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aussieevil

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5379 on: September 13, 2012, 05:25:14 pm »

My reaction to the Manamaid...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Splint

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5380 on: September 13, 2012, 05:25:47 pm »

@ Xahnel - Look at it from someone not well versed it sheer horror's perspective good sir. THEN it becomes horrifying.

Talvieno

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5381 on: September 13, 2012, 05:28:21 pm »

@Xahnel: Lol. It's not really a manamaid at all. In fact, it is just an overweight mermaid. It's still the closest thing I could find, and it still falls waaaay short. :-\

edit: on slenderman: It's the only thing to ever creep me out... and it only did it for a night. :( oh well. I tried to get that same feeling afterwards, but it just didn't work. Manamaids are meant to be lolworthy out of canon, but terrifying in canon. It's kind of a joke.

« Last Edit: September 13, 2012, 05:35:53 pm by Talvieno »
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Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Jack Magnus

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5382 on: September 13, 2012, 05:30:20 pm »

I'm torn between laughing, and.... I don't know what.

I seriously can't think of anything to say. That was hilarious and disgusting at the same time.

Excuse me while my brain BSOD's again.

EDIT: Holy shit, quad ninja'd.
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Talvieno

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5383 on: September 13, 2012, 05:31:02 pm »

Spoiler: not so yuck (click to show/hide)
I'm torn between laughing, and.... I don't know what.
Welcome to the club. ;D So thought we, when we dreamed it up.
« Last Edit: September 13, 2012, 05:38:52 pm by Talvieno »
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Quote from: Mr Frog
Talvieno ... seems to be able to smash out novella-length tales on demand

Splint

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Re: Spearbreakers - Madness. Mayhem. Mugs. (34.11)
« Reply #5384 on: September 13, 2012, 05:36:37 pm »

Manamaids - The result of three overly imaginative dickheads being up WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too late on Tinychat.
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