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Author Topic: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want  (Read 17540 times)

kaijyuu

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #30 on: April 10, 2012, 12:43:38 am »

That's a damn sexy thong.
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For, in order that men should resist injustice, something more is necessary than that they should think injustice unpleasant. They must think injustice absurd; above all, they must think it startling. They must retain the violence of a virgin astonishment. When the pessimist looks at any infamy, it is to him, after all, only a repetition of the infamy of existence. But the optimist sees injustice as something discordant and unexpected, and it stings him into action.

bombzero

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #31 on: April 10, 2012, 03:26:40 am »

artifact thongs have me convinced all dwarves have some fucked up fetishes.
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kaijyuu

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #32 on: April 10, 2012, 03:50:19 am »

With those spikes, maybe literally!
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Quote from: Chesterton
For, in order that men should resist injustice, something more is necessary than that they should think injustice unpleasant. They must think injustice absurd; above all, they must think it startling. They must retain the violence of a virgin astonishment. When the pessimist looks at any infamy, it is to him, after all, only a repetition of the infamy of existence. But the optimist sees injustice as something discordant and unexpected, and it stings him into action.

xdarkcodex

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #33 on: April 10, 2012, 04:34:34 am »

The name of the dwarf sown(?) on the thong is named Kosoth Whiprumors as well.
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Elone

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #34 on: April 10, 2012, 08:15:55 am »

I just turn the artefacts off... I used to allow them, but I never end up using the junk, for anything at all. Theres that interesting bit with being able to make a legendary metalsmith or something, but until I figure out how that works, I have virtually zero use for the artefacts. The worst ones are made of cheap bone... eesh. And oak, dont talk so about it! If the dorf was gonna pick a log, he was gonna pick a log. The oak is the most epic one of them, unless you're aiming for a fancy colour from the caves.

Getting possessed is always such a waste. It potentially costs you a dwarf, with nothing gotten in return.

Oh and yeah, if I were to allow creation of an artefact, I would always PACK IT. That way I'd get something worth seeing.
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Findulidas

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #35 on: April 10, 2012, 09:07:57 am »

I once got a steel mug with goblin bone and black diamonds on it. Sounds really cool but its completely useless ingame.

I also got a fell mood where the dwarf took my legendary weapon/armorsmith and butchered him and turned him into a chair. While not an useless artifact the loss of a legendary armor and weaponsmith far outweighed anything the dwarf ever could produce. DO NOT BUILD YOUR BUTCHER SHOP NEXT TO FORGES.
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bombzero

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #36 on: April 10, 2012, 06:37:06 pm »

I once got a steel mug with goblin bone and black diamonds on it. Sounds really cool but its completely useless ingame.

I also got a fell mood where the dwarf took my legendary weapon/armorsmith and butchered him and turned him into a chair. While not an useless artifact the loss of a legendary armor and weaponsmith far outweighed anything the dwarf ever could produce. DO NOT BUILD YOUR BUTCHER SHOP NEXT TO FORGES.

yes, build it next to the potash workers.
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xdarkcodex

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #37 on: April 10, 2012, 08:46:54 pm »

They said I could become anything...


So I became a chair.
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Garath

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #38 on: April 11, 2012, 03:27:25 am »

a mango wood blowgun, decorated with steel, leather and yellow diamond.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
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Sus

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #39 on: April 11, 2012, 04:09:53 am »

artifact thongs have me convinced all dwarves have some fucked up fetishes.
I got one of those, too:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

...I'm fairly sure I've seen Lady Gaga wear this.  :-\
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If you launch a wooden mine cart towards the ocean at a sufficient speed, you can have your entire dwarf sail away in an ark.

Garath

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #40 on: April 11, 2012, 05:35:18 am »

I've got two thongs in my current fort, one leather and one silk. Something for everyone, I guess.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Gizogin

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #41 on: April 11, 2012, 06:57:05 am »

My current fort, Dragongild, has more than fifteen artifacts.  Of them, exactly three are usable: a hatch cover, a cage, and a ridulously awesome coffin.  The rest are all amulets, rings, earrings, and other such useless things.  I have no fewer than three perfect gems.  They are completely useless.
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Sonlirain

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #42 on: April 11, 2012, 07:47:51 am »

My worst artifact so far?

A bone mace.
Just that.
A bone mace.
No engravings no bands...
No anything!

I'm quite sure it's just a large femur...
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Sus

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #43 on: April 11, 2012, 08:29:58 am »

My worst artifact so far?

A bone mace.
Just that.
A bone mace.
No engravings no bands...
No anything!

I'm quite sure it's just a large femur...
Raise you an undecorated birch scepter.
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Certainly you could argue that DF is a lot like The Sims, only... you know... with more vomit and decapitation.
If you launch a wooden mine cart towards the ocean at a sufficient speed, you can have your entire dwarf sail away in an ark.

HiEv

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Re: Artifacts You Really Don't Even Want
« Reply #44 on: April 11, 2012, 09:52:59 am »

I just turn the artefacts off... I used to allow them, but I never end up using the junk, for anything at all. Theres that interesting bit with being able to make a legendary metalsmith or something, but until I figure out how that works, I have virtually zero use for the artefacts. The worst ones are made of cheap bone... eesh. And oak, dont talk so about it! If the dorf was gonna pick a log, he was gonna pick a log. The oak is the most epic one of them, unless you're aiming for a fancy colour from the caves.

Getting possessed is always such a waste. It potentially costs you a dwarf, with nothing gotten in return.
Oh, I totally disagree.  In my current fortress I've gotten an artifact statue and an artifact weapon rack, which are great for instantly elevating a room's value for nobles, plus I got an artifact crossbow.

Then again, I also got this:


Yeah, a single artifact sock.
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