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[Cheesecake]

Yo. I've been thinking of a new fantasy-set world, where the source or magic is the literal music of the Universe. I put it here to have some critique on the characters and towns, and to add in your contributions, because world-building is more fun with more people!
The World:

The continent most of my characters will be set in is called Concord. A super-continent, encompassing all types of terrain and wildlife. It is split into two kingdoms, Pacia and Gora. The former is a united nation ruled by a group of kings, who rule 7 smaller divisions of Pacia. The inhabitants of Pacia are generally more timid, peaceful, and quiet than the Gorians, and most are content farming Pacia's long, flat plains. Gora, on the other hand, is more wild. The people of Gora are hunters, warriors, and adventurers, who traverse Gora's rugged landscape and fight the ferocious predators. The two nations are split by the Flow, a gigantic river on which most boats sink and many do not traverse far beyond their borders.

Although they are separate nations, they are ruled by the Maestro, an enigmatic being who resides in a tower in the sky, which even the mightiest dragons cannot reach. It is said that he orchestrates every single lifetime of every single human, but he does not dabble in the political affairs of the two nations. He leaves the two to their own devices, never intervening. His Tower is said to hold the life of all the deceased, and it is said that when you die, your voice is added to the Orchestra of Souls, singing forever more the story of life. The Tower is visible from everywhere, and it is most visible during the winter solstice.

Many vile creatures dwell in Concord, and they prey on humanity and take delight in burning villages. These monsters take on the form of natural creatures, albeit twisted and horrifying versions of them. This is said to be caused by their lack of soul, which is thought to be the source of creativity. As they have no creativity, they cannot imagine new forms or tactics, and so they take the forms and mannerisms of people and beasts. Some monsters eat humans as food, others eat people for fun or game. They hide in abandoned ruins and castles, since they cannot create their own lairs.

Characters:

Spoiler: Darion Tiley (click to show/hide)

Darion Tiley is an 18 year old songsword from a town in Pacia called Dewhurst, a small backwater town that makes a living on farming and clothes-making. He is a timid boy, who prefers the quiet nature of his hometown, and made songs in his time as a shepherd. This peaceful life, however, was taken from him after a raid by a horde of orcs slaughtered many of the townsfolk. He managed to survive after he sang his mother's old lullaby, which he found out was an old family spell that repelled monsters. He was taken in by a rich family of song writers and songswords, and after they out about his natural ability to sing Songs, they groomed him to be the songsword he is today.

Darion is of average height, with a thin build. He has platinum blonde hair, which he keeps in a ponytail. He wears his necklace under his vest, an heirloom from his friend's family which he kept after he died. He has the superficial look of naivety in his violet eyes, but he has seen more violence than many of the complacent city-folk  that has adopted him. His rugged good looks have earned him the glances of many women in the streets, and the envious glares of the men.

He works as the apprentice of songsword Horus Primer, a legendary warrior who is said to have been a commander in the Third War, although he denies this every time he is asked. Darion views him as a sort of grandfather; stern, old, warm, and complacent. Horus retired in his sixties, and is generally a sarcastic, pessimistic old man.

Spoiler: Eres Kilgore (click to show/hide)

Eres Kilgore is a 17 year old huntress from the Mist, a group of villages in a small secluded area at the base of the Hemlock Mountain that is eternally shrouded in mist. An above-average Gorian huntress, she excels in both physical and mental aptitude, surpassing many of her people. She is the daughter of Chief Alister Kilgore, and was groomed to be the prefect wife, but Eres' wild, outgoing attitude prevented her from obeying her father's wishes.

She was to be wed to a Pacian noble called Miles Douglas, a fat man who indulged himself in exotic cuisine. This marriage had been arranged by the Chiefs of the Mist, save her father, who did not wish for her daughter to be the exotic mistress of a pampered pig. On the day of the wedding, she was miraculously saved from her fate by her father, who stormed into the hut and ran off with Eres. They traversed the rugged wildlands of Gora for a year, hiding from Douglas' men and from the Chiefs' warriors.

They ran out of places to hide in Gora, so they traveled on a boat and tried to stay far from the mainland, but a freak storm caused them to shipwreck on a mysterious shore, where no Gorian had been before; the Nation of Pacia.

Setting:

-Songsword: Songswords are warriors who use Music to amplify their martial strength. They fight in beat, and they clash swords in harmony. Generally, the more harmonious the sound you make during fighting, the better the songsword you are. They create fighting styles in accordance with the Song, and many hum while fighting or practicing. Their favored weapon is the rapier, the longsword, or other swords that are quick and fast. Many create their own customized versions, and almost no two are similar. Songswords are generally nobles or their children, and not everyone has the talent to be one.

-The Song: The Song is the source of magic in the world, and is used by both the High Priests of Pacia and the Shamans of Gora. Every tribe or village has their own variation of the Song, but it generally means the same thing and holds the same melody. All of the spells are variations of excerpts of the Song, and fighting styles are designed as a sort of dance to the Song. The Song is considered the national anthem of both nations, and the Orchestra sings the Song eternally. The Song known to mortal man is merely a verse of the true Song.

-Orcs and Beasts: Orcs are the most widespread monster from both nations. In Pacia, they resemble wolves, foxes, and livestock, and are smaller than the Gorian variants. They are, however, the smarter of the two, and are more cunning. They are referred to goblins for simplicity. The Gorian orcs are larger and more aggressive, and take the appearance of boars or gorillas. Orcs hunt in hordes of 10-15, and use blunt weapons like sticks and stones or weapons looted from dead bodies.

Other beasts include dire variants of normal beasts, like rats and bears. They are monsters who take on their forms and are generally twice the normal size and are carnivorous, regardless of the animal imitated. They are notorious for wiping out every living thing nearby, wild animals and livestock included.

Undead creatures are rare, and are raised by necromancers; people who created spells by singing the Song backwards [which is a sin punishable by torture and life imprisonment, because necromancers rise after death as well] The undead are extremely spiteful of living things, and kill everything in their path.

Dragons are ancient, vile creatures of malign intent to the extreme. They are winged beasts, with either fur or scales and live in all climates. They speak in Song, and they know a much more complete version of the Song, resulting in them being far greater spellcasters. They live for extremely long, and can regenerate almost all body parts, including their head. The only parts that they cannot regenerate are the vocal chords or the heart.


More to be added later. I'd like some thoughts on the setting, and I welcome all contributions, be they characters or story plots. Basically the main story I had in mind was of Darion meeting Eres and Alister, trying to stop Douglas and his corrupt noble family, but apart from that, I don't have a definitive big bad.

[Cheesecake]

Reserved for stories and other stuff.

[Xantalos]

I gusta this and will be watching.

[Parsely]

Wow this looks increda-bully-orsome

[Cheesecake]

Spoiler: Chapter 1 (click to show/hide)

Chapter 1: A Land Far Away

Eres grunted as she lifted the heavy lump of wood that used to be their raft over her stomach. She slowly got up and limped towards an elderly man in rags, who struggled to lift the wood on him. She pulled out the wood and helped her father up, who gave her a weak smile.

"Are you alright, Eres?" he said, wiping the sand from his face.

"I'm fine, but I'm worried about you," she said, pointing to the open wound on Alister's thigh.

"It'll be alright. Let's just find a shaman to heal me."

"Um, dad? I don't think we're in Gora anymore."

Eres looked back to the inland area, rolling green hills covered in a small mist with the ocean breeze giving them slight chills coupled with their wet clothing. She could see goats on the hills, with rams butting each other while the others graze. A flock of seagulls fly overhead, and the sound of the waves crashing on the rocky shore barely drown out the sound of chirping and baaing. Eres helps her father to sit on a rock, while she looks for her spear. She finds it smashed under the boat, and her expression darkens as she realizes that they are weaponless in this new land.

She picks up a sharp looking rock and fashions a shield by taking a piece of wood and fashioning a handle with a piece of cloth she ripped from her sleeve. She heads over to Alister and picks him up as they start to head up the hills. It gets chillier the higher they rise, and Alister covers Eres to shield her from the cold. She appreciates the warmth her father gives, but fears that a man of his age cannot survive in a place like this without proper clothing. As they reach the top of the hill, they see a road below, and a cart driven by large, black horses. They gallop through the dirt road, and she can hear the driver yelling commands at them.

She takes her father and runs towards the cart, calling out for help. The cart driver can't hear them over the gallops of the horses and the howling wind, but nevertheless Eres runs with all her might. She is halfway down the hill, but stops as an explosion erupts under the horses, sending bits of horse flesh flying and causing the driver to go airborne. The cart is overturned an the passengers exit through the broken door, coughing. She sees three men, wearing suits and hats and carrying swords sheathed on their belts. Two of them get down first, readying their blades, while the third helps out another passenger: a young lady, about 14-15 years of age.

Eres goes down to help them, but Alister pulls her down and hides her underneath a rock. He grips her mouth as Eres struggles, and she hears howling and grunting in the distance. Orcs! A large horde, of about fifteen to twenty orcs rush towards the group of men and the girl. Some appear wolflike, with pointed ears and display coarse fur. The smaller ones resemble rats, with pointed ears, who scurry quickly on the ground. Then, Eres sees, is the alpha of the horde. A large, muscle-bound orc, roughly 8 feet tall, with the head and roar of a bear and arms as wide as a man. The bear roars, and the orcs run harder and faster, the larger ones trampling the smaller ones under their hooves.

The orcs and the men soon collide, and Eres expected them to be torn to shreds. This wasn't the case. She heard a faint singing, and the two men on the ground gracefully draw their blades and start a dance. Everytime she heard a new beat in their songs, she heard the sound of the blade cutting into flesh. One by one, the orcs fell. She peered over the rocks, and she saw the two men holding their own, and the third covering the girl's eyes and ears. She felt confident that her help wouldn't be needed. Again, this wasn't the case. The wolf-orcs made their way to the men after the smaller ones were cut down, and the men were no match for their strength or speed. She heard them falter, their singing now offbeat, and the man to the left was smashed down to a bloody pulp, the second decapitated.

Eres broke her fathers grip to go help them, readying her shield and stone. She cast it at the orcs with all her might, and the sharp rock made it's mark at the back of the wolf head. The wolf fell to it's knees, not dead, but injured and disoriented. Black blood poured from it's head, and it howled dreadfully. The second turned to face her, snarling angrily before getting down on all fours and charging towards her. She attempted to dodge to get out of the way, but the wolf was too fast. It pinned her down, smashing her shield, as Eres tried to keep the wolf from biting her head off. She felt herself tire, and she prepared for her inevitable death.

The wolf opened it's maw, revealing rows and rows of sharp, gnarled teeth with the cloth and bones of past victims. She smelled blood and death from the mouth, and felt the vile saliva dripping on her face. Her eyes closed, she prayed to the Maestro that this wouldn't be her finale, and this time, it was the case. She felt blood splatter on her face and she saw as she opened her eyes a sword pierced through the wolf's throat. She felt it's grip fade, and she pushed it's lifeless body off. She saw the man from earlier standing overhead offering his hand, with the girl hiding behind him. She accepts it and pulls herself up, filled with adrenaline and fear. She sees the bear orc lying headless at the ground next to the cart, where the man was standing.

"Thank you. For. Saving me," she manages to say, in between her gasps of relief and for air.

"No, thank you madam. Your aim is superb. If it weren't for you, Lady Lovett and I would not have been able to make it to Briar Glen."

"Yes. Thank you, Madam." the girl says, with the voice of a helpless little girl which Eres could somewhat tell she was faking it. 

She turns to see her father limping down towards them, and she rushes to him and brings him over.

"This is my father, Chieftain Alister."

"Pleasure to meet you Chief-Wait, a chieftain? In Pacia?"

"Pacia?" says the father and daughter, facing each other with a confused expression.

The man and the girl look at them with confused expressions, but the man shakes it away. "Nevermind that. We'll find out how you got here soon. But for the meantime, we should head on our way. I've arranged for someone to meet us up north down the road."

The girl looks at him. "Jonah, how could you have gotten help? We're in the middle of bloody nowhere!"

"Watch your tongue, mistress. I've got a transmitter, given to me by the King of Uvary. A new model, surpassing the ones before."

"Who did you call?"

"Barnabus Campbell. Captain of the guard in Briar Glen. He'll meet us at the crossroads." He turns to face Eres and Alister. "I think you two should come with us. It's not safe out here," he motions to the dead orcs. "as you can tell."

They start to head out on their way, through the mist and corpses of orcs, while the man gives Eres and Alister the blades of his comrades.

This is the first chapter. Please tell me what you think! I'd love to hear your opinions on this.

[Parsely]

Yeargh! Wall-text! Me one weakness!

Only kidding. I'll read it soon. Promise.