Turn 12
With a sound like a geoduck in mating season (which is to say, something like "splurt") the darkness of the cave is replaced by the hot, hot sun of California. You are in an incredibly shifty part of Los Angeles, in fact. The streets are populated by people who make furtive movements in large, puffy shoes. You're centered on a street intersection, though there are few cars because most people who could afford a car have used it to drive far, far away. The bonfire, naturally, is still present. The houses are packed close together leaving little space off of the street, except one which has a swimming pool and a small, dead lawn. In the distance, though you might wish it was more distant, you can hear the roar of a giant rabbit and the screams of helpless gangsters. Gunfire intermittently breaks out among the buildings nearby.
Thus opens the twelfth act.
Noodlrex - Myranosaurus Vex: Without deadly teeth to work with, you decide to use your immense dinosaur weight to your advantage. Though there's no longer a cavern to bring down on people's heads, you decide smashing a building will have to do. You lunge into the nearest ramshackle house (1) and that is THE LAST THING YOU EVER SEE. Little did you know, that particular house was being used as a highly unsafe meth lab. And an ammunition dump. And it was home to several dozen jerry cans full of petrol siphoned from random cars. Needless to say, in one loud noise and a several story conflagration, you are REDUCED TO FINE RED DINO-MIST. Which, by the way, means you're DEAD. Your legacy lives on though, in the form of fire spreading to the nearby, not-built-to-code houses.
FingO - Tinkerbell the Magnificent: You force the you-sized dinosaur tooth out of you, and take off your silly fairy dress to try to bandage the wound. You momentarily reflect that you could have a lot of fun traumatizing small children with your nakedness since you normally use your amnesia powder if they see you anyway. (1-1) Nonetheless, you don't get a bonus, and it quickly becomes apparent that your frilly skirt will not prove adequate to bind the GAPING WOUND THAT IS MOST OF YOUR TORSO. To seal the deal, there is a huge explosion and you are CRUSHED by an errant, hairy, flying basketball-shorts clad GANGSTER LEG. Thus, you are rendered DOUBLE DEAD. No, that does not confer any advantages over being regular dead. You do however, have the honor of being the first character (I think) to roll a 1 not once, but twice in a row.
zomara0292 - Copy: Enraged, you quickly resume combat with the adventurer! (1)vs(1+1) Without your needles, it seems that you are at a disadvantage the at least somewhat combat-experienced adventurer. He wounds you with his ambiguous weapon again, and though you aren't wounded per se, it causes you to LOSE ALL OF YOUR HIT POINTS. You DIE and your corpse VANISHES, leaving behind 3 GOLD COINS. Alas, it should seem that, like your predecessor, your journey to weave the very fabrics of the universe has come to a sudden end. Only time will tell if your unrighteous slayer gets his comeuppance, or steals your very dream and becomes a god himself.
Yoink - Kro-dawg: When you invented the art of "rapping" in your small neolithic tribe when you were young, you had no idea that, one day, you would see a world dedicated to the art that you had invented literally thousands of years ago. You can only hope that these people have become dedicated and wizened poets who seek to explain the mysteries of life through their art, as you did in your youth so long ago. However, you see someone who is NOT a rapper, and decide it's probably fair game to whack him with your sharp stick. Because you know that easy targets are the best targets, and that sleeping targets are the easiest targets, you decide to hit some berk who's sitting down and looking dozy. You sneak up behind him and raise your sword, (2) but something even bigger hits you from behind- so hard that you're flung across the street, into a pool of water. Despite the water softening the impact, you feel like it maybe broke something important. As you blink water out of your eyes and get the wits to look around, you see that it is some kind of man-shaped beast of living stone, with a great ethereal shield. In fact, it looks like it's just plain tearing shit up over there.
Tiruin - Menalos Svarrich: Somewhat disappointed with your smoking rodent result from earlier, you try again to consult the wisdom of an animal guardian. This time, you do your best to relax and focus on the task at hand. You make a sort of buddha pose and wait for a spirit guide to reach you again. (2) Much to your dismay, the smoking weasel comes back. He takes a long toke -and then another- and then begins to speak. "You are wise to seek my advice again. The last time you saw me, it was... a test of faith! Yes." He tokes off again. "I have a quest, which you must fulfill. It is imperative! Seek for me, in one of the buildings that surrounds you, the... holy leaf. It should be shredded in a little plastic baggy. Oh, and the more the better. Now GO!" and thus with a smokey breath, your animal guide vanishes. Due to all the second hand smoke, you are now TRIPPING BALLS. Everything is orange and pink and there's dolphins in the air, and mushrooms fighting all around you.
BunnyBob77 - Tom the Almighty: (2) You hit yourself with your God-Blade of infinite power. Your shin is bruised. Oh, and a house explodes near you. That's interesting.
Caerwyn - Murasaki: To your moderate dismay, your attack-designated Murasaki continues to attack the giant dinosaur, and is vaporized (along with the dinosaur itself) in a large explosion. With the defender Murasaki still standing awkwardly close to you, you start the search through buildings on the unexploded side of the street. (4) You do find some weapons -handguns, in the hands of some surly looking thugs- three of them in all. However, they're in another room of the house you're in and haven't noticed you yet.
Spinal_Taper - Randolph: You think that you might make a guardian for yourself, so you let yourself envision it. (1) Owing to loud noise, your mind wanders. The result is a giant, stone guardian with an impenetrable shield. For itself. It seems for a moment to be working when it hits some fellow who apparently was menacing you with a sword, but then immediately after the giant stone beast kicks you clear across the street into a BURNING BUILDING. In addition to the injuries you suffer, which are bad enough, it seems that the impact has rendered you FULLY AWAKE. The comfort of your dream-world is gone. Now there is only you, the flames and the rubble, and the acrid smell of burning dinosaur.
agentorangesoda - The Higgs-Boson: After keeping everybody in the dark about this whole nature-of-gravity for so long, you think it's around time you finally showed them how it works. (5) Well, there goes most of Asia. Two down, five to go.
hachnslay - The @
.##.#....
.......U.
..G......
......@..
......U..
.........
(1+1) The TOWNSPERSON hits you!
You are WOUNDED! The wound is BLEEDING!
You strike the TOWNSPERSON.
The TOWNSPERSON is dead. You collect 3 GOLD COINS.
What a freakin' bloodbath. I'm a little tired for commentary, but heads up: hachnslay, agentorangesoda and Spinal_Taper all make TWO actions next turn, because it'll be their last before ascending! Or dying, possibly. Oh, and in case you haven't guessed from my GMing style already, I AM keeping track of which continents you guys have completely destroyed and it IS liable to have an effect gameplay.
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Topic: The HARDCORE RTD II: Turn 12 (Join Fast Any Time) 24 Deaths and counting! (Read 21893 times)