Okay, step 1 wexamine th...
step ione is disable casp lock.
steop TWO is disabel the... i mean dexamine the fort
Holy shit, a military. Or at least a bunch of duoodes in the unit list doing drills eand demonstrations or we/
I vageulyi recaill this. Have I been heere befoure?
obtw
I registerd Drunk Fort as a non-steam game. on steam.
so... add Shoruke on Steam sometime! You can tell when I'm playing Drunk Fort :3
Also it took me three treis to spell my name justd there
wait
vas is das
well, robably a dumbass idea to pull it
LEEEEEET'S DO IIIIIIIT
I maen, last time I wauz like, what could go wrong, nothgin went wroing. So
OH GOD OH NO EVERYBODYS TURNING INTO
...dorfs. Okay.
also its spring. SO I guess Im' strating in springk
what did that lever ieven tdo
theres too many unnamed dorfs.
claerly the only cuorse of action is...
You fools, we are ALL Shoruke.
Join us...become one with Mother Russia The Shorukening.
Also, nine more Shorukes.
The poll needs a "well, it's as safe as any OTHER fortress, at least..." option. For people who aren't me, anyway.
(wait all these oddly-coloured miners and watevr... HAVE CUSTEOM DTILTES*
also
welcome to SHORK IS LEGION
land of THE SHORKS
which is presided ober by
ME
SHORK
BWAHAHA
AHAHA SEE IT'S GOT MY DNAME WRTEIITN ON IT AND every thing....
did... I do that?
...nah.
SEE ITS GOT MY NAME WRITTEN ON IT AND EVERYTHIGN
AND I DIDNT' EVEN DO TI
...that i remembr
holy shit, the tropsg are just... climbing aroudn in the caves.
scary
yes i found a shork-style magma forge
ist must be... built by a SHORTK
but how
i dotn' remembre.... kinda...
huh?
backup
is our fort infestred with VAMPRIE WERELEPHATNS
fuck dood
I spent so much long...
I tried SO HOARD to stay saway from these kidn of fanfisc
goddanmit
apparently girlfriend is playing FTL too.
Got a ship full of non air brethre peopel.
named it the USS Ventsurprise
I'm so proud
so anyway this drunkf- jesus christ.
the worst part is I thikn I strated this...
OH
IT DIDNT DO THE THING
so today we learned...
well, severeal montsh ago we learend that all japanese otakus are pervaerts.
or engouh of them to make money or somethign
see cuz
every store with like figurines and stuff
is gonna have an adult section
with bikini figurines.
OH GOD THE BIKINI FIGURINES.
I wandred in on that shit like a dozen times. By accidetn.
addmittdly I coudln't read japanese but still.
on the oter hadn i dotn' blame them., super sonicos' tits are JUST NICE
but anywya dorfs
wat
okay
HEY
SOMEONE MADE A NOTSHORKSTYEL GRAVE
>:|
Migtrhants?
Oh good MAOR SHORKS
oh also it seems to be that time of the month
when all the dorfs get horny for elephatns or something
eh, theyll deal with it themsfvles, i have megratns to hanem
aaaaand theyre back. didtn' last very danm long.
basically dorfs turn into elephants like teenagers have sex. OOOOOOOOH BURN
WHAT
VRYO THE SAVRIOUS IS THE NEW MAYOR
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHORK MEMES
BALSPHFEMY
he ust be PUT TO DEFF
...I cant' do it. I can't sacrifice vyron, hes' just ike me. watns to be a truoo dorf. I'll have to sarfice someone esle...
WHO THE FUCK IS SZASIT
ho wait still gettting migratns.
OH WELL
TAFLNTED MINOR OR NO U DIE
SO MY CAT, RIGTE
is all hlike
HEY SHORK
im like wat
hes like GUESS HOW I AM
im like well well it soudsn like ur about to hock a hairball
hes like I FEEL
MORROWWS 
im like fuck
take him to the bathroom
turns out he just wanted a hug
he is now layign siege to my pillow.
scratch that hes makgin sure i cant typie
fukkin cats
better not styeal my coconut rum
AHA
TABESL TURNED YOU CAT
normally when im like hey cat smell my breath
hes like hey that s cool. interestgin
but today hes like
dude the fuck.
so HAH
fuck u back cat
NOW GET OUT OF MY RUM
...rite dorfs
best way to scrfivce a dorf
FUCKING CAT HIAR ALL OVER THE KEYBAORD
is to drp them into the volcano.
so
gbridge
lever
eazsy
nobody is buidlign the bridge
make a billion masons
still nobody sz buidlgin the bridge
remove brruows
STILL BNOBOD- nvm there we go
.huh. how did a craftderp shork die of dehydration?
we have like 600 booz...
wetn to sleep with no water bottle?
I foudn a cavern!
dunno hoow
but it was next to the magma sea!
and a magma pool
and
basically caves and magma.
hmm. when i build a fllor onto a bridge it collspases.
need a new strategy...
HOW THE FUCSK ARE YOU...
why is there so much wining aobut no water
okay
UR DORFS
DRINK BOOZE
ALSO?!?
THESE IS TOTALLY WATER
I buitl a wlell and evretyhign i dunno what you want
...i was goona ask how all these ppl keep kdrying.
i think a bunch of them are "shork doest know how to volcano deathrap.
:
wups.
WHAT
all these other migratns
fuckers
why do u all block the migratn space... rassfum frassmum...
OHHHHHHHHHHH
the pointy lever closes the front door
lol...
no wonder everyone outside is starving...
ITS SUMMER
wait, only?
no way am I getting through a whole year like this
BUT I MUST LAT LEAST ESCRIFCEICE A SHORK
one of the shorks got a fey mood
gave dat bitch a bower shoppe
bitches love... to nkow how to finish this meme.
oops.
ANYWAY
hoomin caravan.
fuck em.
busy.
gotta sacrifice a shork.
FOR SCIENCE
OKAY READY
THE SETUP
THE METHOD-
hey where'd he go
w/e
PULL THE THING AND
like
this only with magma not crocs
THE RESULT!?
hmm yes
wait what
...
fizzicks i gueess??
uh
I'm down to level z59
magma start sat
113
mental note, freefall makes you invulnerable
Z50
Z10
Z -1!?
Z -13!?!?!?!
also I'm mayor now. Dunno what happened
The lsat layir! Did he survive!?!?
um
I seem to hafve... disappeared
but i made a thing! :3
aaaand I succeeded in killing myself. And also taking over a fort.
my work is done.
nighty night.
http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=11232
Poll
Author
Topic: !!DRUNK FORTRESS!! [We Hath Become Death, the Destroyers of Worlds] (Read 1163930 times)