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I am small and neutral, like Switzerland

[Kokrot]

Are "local" brews of unknown ABV acceptable?  We don't exactly have testing equipment, heh.

I say 'tis even more dwarfy to go this route!  What say thee?  (totally not mildly blasted already)

It's all good mate. Moonshine, homebrew, windowlene. Does the same job.

I'm drinking a Timmermans  lambic and... some other stuff...

I've cleaned the fortress up a little, although after so much suffering it genuinely resembles a disaster zone.

I've constructed a new entranceway with a pit to catch those pesky invaders. As yet untested though, not sure if trolls could climb out.

I've put the undead to rest as best I could.

Now, let's see what the rest of the year brings.

Most of the above I wrote last night, got too drunk after that. So I'm now continuing with a hangover.

Somewhat ironically, I think the visiting human bards are getting drunk and antagonising the dwarven bards, and the whole thing has descended into a free-for-all. The bards are attacking our plucky dorfs now. Oh, and the Baron Consort was killed in a barfight.

Hair o' the dog time. Bit more blackberry mead.

We're getting quite a few visitors, but I'm very suspicious of them. I might have a few of them executed just to put my mind at ease. Last thing we need is another wererhino attack.

We got another 10 migrants! 2 of them children, who went to play in the tavern.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I'm going to have to do something about our 'guests'

The keas are literally flying away with loads of valuables

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And now my watch is over.

I think I've resurrecteded the fort. We now have 35 citizens.
I built a new entranceway that should be useful for defence. I also built magma forges and smelters, and a combined temple/library. Hopefully guests will head here rather than the tavern, which should result in fewer fights. Speaking of which, be very careful when executing visitors. Occasionally they are friends or relatives of citizens and you end up with a loyalty cascade...

https://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=15741

[Shakerag]

Damn.  Just took a peek at the save and y'all done some shit.

[Moonstone_Flower]

Alright i"ve had a shot of whater this orange-and-wine stuff is and apparently it's stronger than usual so I'm gonna just... hope I can upload a damn file at the end

Unless someone's already taking a turn?

P.S.  Iread the title as "We Hath Bacon" and I like it despite the fact that meat makes me chunder like a fish, so I put the bacon in the box, and so there.

[Schmaven]

I haven't heard anyone indicate that they're currently taking a turn, so go for it

[Moonstone_Flower]

Okay Iwent to scroll through the Zs and the game unpaused itself for a few dicks for some reason

The fort is so imbued with intoxcicats that I swear it can't even get commandds roight.

Fccccccckkkkkkk it I'm taking another shot and mucning some peanut butt granola.

Id PeakArmour is so facked that she's got asthma!



Why are the stockpiles these weird fucking columns?!  You'll spill less wine if you use rows, you know?!

Why the fuck is nobody dwarfed

Where in the name of heavy CRAMPSIS THE netraceTO THE fort

arlight I finished spring btu my battery is low (we're on solar-only, no grid power here) so I'llcome back to it... either tomorrow night or day afterrt, dont' wanna drink severalda ys in a row ya know?  As hilarious an evening as it's been...

[Kokrot]

I've just changed jobs and my shifts will take a while to figure out, but after that I can resume drunken dorf games

[Yoink]

How're y'all doing?   
Did Moonstone ever post the save somewhere?   

[Kokrot]

oh yeah we've been waiting quite a while now...

I'm on a 4-on-4-off shift pattern now. When I can commit to a turn I'll attempt to do it in a single sitting

[Shakerag]

I sent Moonstone a PM.  We'll see.

[Shakerag]

Alright.  This is multiple nights I have been drunk and ready.  If Moonstone doesn't show up I'm just gonna continue from Kokorot's save.

[Shakerag]

It's been 4 days since I threw a PM.  I assume it's ok to go from the last save.  I might this week.

[Moonstone_Flower]

My apologies, my laptop died and I was unable to finish my turn.  I can attempt to finish tomorrow unless someone else wants to take over.  Either way, I'll post whatever I have then.

[Moonstone_Flower]

Alright, I'm starting up with something one of the guys brewed from some leaf... thing.  I'll post whatever I manage to complete in a few hours.

Hmm it tastes like pumpkin seeds, hemp hearts, and granola all at once... with a bit of artichoke or those big mushrooms you find on some burgers... it's a weird taste but somehow not bad.

[Moonstone_Flower]

Lgog of who the hell am I again?

Took another shot, blood oranges taste fuckging good.

okay these chumpettes have elected me overseer somehow- what?  What do you mean I claimed it last night?!  I was sober last night!  Eh sod it, time to do some reorganising around here.

First off, there’s not enough smooth stone to... *ahem*, everyone’s an ENGRAVER now!

They used to call me Cog, but plants are fucking terrifying so you lot can call me Hog-Cog-Millet now!

* belch

Alright everyone get to *belch* get to work already- wait are these our only two damn famrs what is this crap, alright time to fix that



what do you mean there’s NO GLASS FURNACES screw it im’ way too dunk to be dealing with this shet just tear down a forge and stick a glass thing in there

Heheh glass things huh, I got some glass things I’d like to make if there’s any sand... heh, glass...

Why the fuck are you making a zinc ring, who wants that crap?!

tim e for another shot I’m starting to lose the effects, how horrifying

THE TAVERN IS FULL OF FACKING JUNK



someone sober must have designed this entranc epath becausew hat the HELL is that???  Get back to hurk, you sluckers!

Who’s a fine stone block, yes you aaaaaare...

wheeeere the fcuk is the still?!  Oh there it is- what do you mean “that’s another kitchen”- oh deernuts it is/  sO where’s the STILL?!

More blood oranges, tastea waaayyyy too god to be alcoholic ‘cause youj ust wanna CHUG it but that’d probably kill a man
...good thing we’re not MEN *SNORT*

found it

screw thism I’m building a tower, I got idead- YOU MOTHER OF FOUL FOWLSPAWN ph wiat secretivbe moodsare perfectly saaaafe

right okay so, tower time.  There are NOT ENOUGH masonry shoooooooooooOOOOOOP!S

this... this horrific tragedy fo crapish proportionatess shall NOT STAND- wait, no, the shops will stand, once they’re built, anf weget... shops.  That ware standing.  STANDING!!

ah faknuts the secretive guy wanst rough gems and I dont’ see depo...depists- no okay no I see no uh, gem cluster bibots...things.

The undergrous lakes in the lakces look like LUNGS



dig.  you fools.  DIG that epxlodararey (ed. "exploratory") tunnel to find the geeeeems for me bloody necklace of black  puddingg- wait
what
what/
what?

hey a giant oldm and a giant cave tod are fighting soemewhere, the olm is filling the lakes with chunder

conscrtuion (ed. "construction") of the tower proceeds at a pace that could best be described as “WHERE THE CACK ARE YOU SLACKERS” and uncharitabyl as “what wall and floors”

alright which oen of you jokers made a bracelte o’ yer own HAIR an’ leeft it iin the FACKING hospital?!  Come pick up your sock bracelet!

Okay basically nothing is happening because everyone is too bloody sober and they just runnign around...ORGANISING
ORAGNS
wait oranges?  Alrigth fine oenm ore shot and then I’mmaha ve to ... go lie odnw and watch futurama

oh shit



Oi you two in the still!  What are you doi- oh my GODS are you having disgusting dwarfsex over a mug of beer in there?!  (fro real they’r just stackfed on top of each other in the still, one drinking and ones leeping, it’s creepy as faiuck.)

(and my pwoer’s running out – i have a solar power system but no grid pwoer so games go throughi t pretty fast)

BARFIGHT

“Your story sucked!”  “Yours sucked, AND your short fat hairy mother!”



kick that overgrown hairless ape’s arsenozzle!  And by that I mean kick its ASS, irght in the donkey!

some shitty human justt ried to beat up a DOG of all things, the nmoron

alright spring’s over time to give our battery a break


Alright time to start up again.  Got some weird thing made of some sort of leaves, I never really paid much attention but it tastes good so we’ll go with that.  Gimme a bit to get the effects going...

ahyep thre we go
alrgiht ket’s get this starty farted

continue my TOWER you sober sonsof humans, BUILD tot he skies!  THE SKIES!  we shall conquer the very air with our... sky-piercing shaft of hollows!

wait
WHAT



WHAT IM’ SORRY YOU WHAHT

okaya so for the record it is 257-04-02 adn somehwo that happened

PULL
THE LEVERS

yesssss.a
we shall seeee the splatterings of... waitthats’ lunch
okay you goblins- DWARFS?!



the lsisst (ed. "list") goes on but  yousee my delemm- dilmea- dil- you know what  Ime an YUO CAN SEE THE PROBLEM HERE

THEY’RE SOREBER
sobber
ssure

zofdberg
zoid thati s

whtat ddo you mean thee mu (ed. "the emu") is fighting, do I lookd soaber engough to care?
okay it’sa sa a moosefs moses moose now waht do i care GET INSIDEB EFORE THE ANTIDURUNKENS KILL US ALL
ro worsse take our ale,that t’s horrifyigng

movvning on let’ssju ts goto  bed and wait this ala l out, right, rigthght CLOSE THE GAETRES

um.
ofkay anmailas and dwfarvfes are dyging left and right    what do Id o, I’m o confused
help



oops crajp.
sofar thats’s five dwfraves and a bbnuch of pets?  welpe-
HELP-



aw nutsg

and unfortrunately thsi latptop canbarely handle thegame nomrallybut this nvvasion has basicaylyl brought it to a standtstlil

no jo ke wev'e gotlike 1-3FpsS, (edit1:  And the new laptop was overheating, did I mention that?  Seems Millet's death was rather symbolic, perhaps.) sorry all btu lookfor the save in a fewhorsu when I’m... nggot so ingot.

Edit1:  Save:  https://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=15757

[Schmaven]

I probably should've mentioned it sooner, but during my turn, I found an artifact hatch cover and installed it over the entry stairway.  I only found that 1 entrance, so unless there are other entries, it should be easily lockable in the event the need to turtle up for a bit arises.