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Author Topic: Life Begins At Death - Epilogue: We Live And Live Again  (Read 513456 times)

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8160 on: January 02, 2014, 09:43:40 am »

Kevin goes over to the two, he presumes, men dining in the corner.
"Sorry to disturb you, but have you seen any chairs walk in here of their own accord?"

The skeleton immediately turns to you, followed by the man. It's very difficult to read the skeleton's expression, but the man - a slimy-looking individual dressed in very mute colors - looks rather interested. The skeleton speaks first, unusually enough, a deep, unexpectedly warm female voice emanating from the skull as its eyes flicker strangely.

"Oh my, aren't you an... interesting-looking one. Shame you're taken. Darn shame, really," she says to you, shaking her head.

"That's never been an obstacle before, Lizzie!" the man says, then laughs to himself.

"Oh, stop, you!" Lizzie replies, waving her hand dismissively at the man and giggling as well. She looks back at you. "Don't mind him, my good man, he's drunk."

"So are you!"

"Well, yes, but I'm certainly better at dealing with it than you are. How far did you dial it, anyway?"

"Not too far, I think. Little more than usual, but it's quite the occasion, is it not?"

"That it is! Speaking of, would you like to join us, sir? The show's exquisite, I must say," Lizzie says to you, pointing at the storm of furniture and other things developing between the two mage-hands - you can even see a corpse or two flying about. "And this is the best seat in the house. Got inertial shielding and everything! Hah! Come now, sit with us," the skeletal lady says, indicating a free seat next to herself.
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8161 on: January 02, 2014, 09:55:20 am »

"If you insist.", Kevin says, and sits down.
"How would you know if I'm taken?"
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Tomcost

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8162 on: January 02, 2014, 09:59:03 am »

((There are even more corpses there! Call Mark!))

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8163 on: January 02, 2014, 10:19:50 am »

"If you insist.", Kevin says, and sits down.
"How would you know if I'm taken?"

"Why, because I'm an expert, naturally. I see these things. I see lots of things."

"Some of them even real, in fact!"

"Yes! Now, don't be shy, sir," Lizzie continues, leaning in toward you. "I'm Lizzie, and this man right here is my good friend Stephen. We work together on occasion. And those two lovely ladies battling it out over there are our retainers - they had a bit of a disagreement, and they're more than a little drunk, you see, so things spiraled out of control just a little bit. But enough about them - who are you, if you permit me to ask?"

"Oh, she's got you now!"

"No need for running commentary, Stephen! You'll scare the poor fellow," Lizzie snaps at Steven, then turning to look at you expectantly.
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8164 on: January 02, 2014, 10:26:49 am »

"I am Kevin, royal jester. I'm also undead, although you may not notice it at first glance. I went through an experimental portal and a demon transformed me into this. It's pretty neat. Some guard tried stabbing me but his halberd went right in, and it didn't come out on the other side!"
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8165 on: January 02, 2014, 10:47:58 am »

"I am Kevin, royal jester. I'm also undead, although you may not notice it at first glance. I went through an experimental portal and a demon transformed me into this. It's pretty neat. Some guard tried stabbing me but his halberd went right in, and it didn't come out on the other side!"

"A royal jester? Didn't expect that, I must say."

"Know any good mage jokes?"

"Don't pester him, dear. I'm sure he's tired of being asked that, aren't you, Kevin? Which court are you from? I've visited a few, and I don't recall anyone like you around. I'd definitely... wait, did you say a guard tried to stab you? What for?"
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8166 on: January 02, 2014, 10:52:35 am »

"We sort of robbed a bookstore. Our master needed books on the Sea of Death. It's not like I like killing, the plan was to steal them unnoticed. Sadly, my fellow, uh, undead aren't as subtle. They're hardly undead anymore, though. One of them is a chair, as I mentioned, and there's a butler that got turned into a desk."
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8167 on: January 02, 2014, 11:12:04 am »

"We sort of robbed a bookstore. Our master needed books on the Sea of Death. It's not like I like killing, the plan was to steal them unnoticed. Sadly, my fellow, uh, undead aren't as subtle. They're hardly undead anymore, though. One of them is a chair, as I mentioned, and there's a butler that got turned into a desk."

"So you're a gentleman thief as well? Man of many talents, eh?"

"I'd say branching out is quite a commendable thing in this day and age, really. So, you say you ran into some guards? How did it go? Did you manage a daring escape into the night, perhaps, followed by a tense morning spent dividing the loot? I've always wondered what it's like to break the law, honestly."

"You have? Don't you break the law, like, three times a day on a quiet week?"

"Oh, shush. It's not the same without consequences, you know?"
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8168 on: January 02, 2014, 12:50:03 pm »

"Well, the chair golem guy that I'm looking for pulped a first load of guards and made them into sandwiches, which another companion then ate. Then I killed some more, but after we managed to break into the attic where the guy stored his books, there was a whole load of them and I got magically catapulted into a nearby building. I played dead, which isn't hard without a heartbeat, and got buried, then dug up, then they wanted to cut me up due to my... special structure and I got released because the pulping of all of my limbs was enough of a punishment. Some smith guy fixed me up. We have some sort of undead skeletal surgeon, but he's... a little odd. If he repairs you, you end up a monstrosity. And I'm a jester, not a freak!"
« Last Edit: January 02, 2014, 12:52:33 pm by miauw62 »
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Tomcost

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8169 on: January 02, 2014, 01:13:04 pm »

"Well, the chair golem guy that I'm looking for pulped a first load of guards and made them into sandwiches, which another companion then ate. Then I killed some more, but after we managed to break into the attic where the guy stored his books, there was a whole load of them and I got magically catapulted into a nearby building. I played dead, which isn't hard without a heartbeat, and got buried, then dug up, then they wanted to cut me up due to my... special structure and I got released because the pulping of all of my limbs was enough of a punishment. Some smith guy fixed me up. We have some sort of undead skeletal surgeon, but he's... a little odd. If he repairs you, you end up a monstrosity. And I'm a jester, not a freak!"
((Sigmund didn't eat the sandwiches, he threw them at an alley))

Nunzillor

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8170 on: January 02, 2014, 04:12:48 pm »

Telling others of your terrible crimes against the law, humanity, and the very fabric of reality itself?  That's how I break the ice when meeting new people too!
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Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8171 on: January 02, 2014, 07:09:58 pm »

In the streets of Shriekpot...

Niklas knows that now it is time to run like the littlest female puppy of the litter, though he is unwilling to leave his brave new chair friend in the lurch - he grabs the chair with one leg and tries to escape!

[Niklas' escape roll: 1-1]
[Chair-Hater's pursuit roll: 6]

Before Niklas can even turn around, the chair-hater has caught up with him, grabbing at the wooden chair that Niklas is currently holding on to.

[Chair-Hater's chair destruction roll: 5+1]

He pulls the chair out of Niklas' grasp, throws it upward, then, as it is about to land, headbutts it in half. Then he snaps the individual parts of the chair into smaller fragments, breaking each into no less than three and no more than eight fragments. For a moment, Niklas is really glad he isn't made out of wood. Then he notices yet another chair fly out of the window of the tavern, flying along the street and skidding rapidly toward the crazed man.

[Chair-Hater's dodge roll: 1+1-1]

The chair-hater doesn't notice the chair's approach, and it promptly sweeps him off his feet, sending him falling to the ground backwards.

[Chair-Hater's endurance roll: 2]

He appears to be visibly bleeding from his head now. Also, he is screaming louder than before. Judging by the expression on his face, this is mostly due to his anger reaching previously unseen levels. He tries to get up, but slips in his own blood, which obviously impedes his progress.

"CURSE YOU, CHAIRS!"


On the deck of the Second Shank...

Sigmund, upon finding out that his new snake probably harbors only ill intentions toward him, comes to a conclusion about the people in this town - they are a confusing, frightening lot and mean him nothing but the very worst they can muster.

"So, it appears that common folk in this town carry dangerous magical elements. I think that if I ever have to press the button, I will do so just before throwing this to an enemy. Thanks for the information."

"Welcome."

Sigmund then goes over to the part of the deck where the aftcastle begins, grabbing a barrel on the way. He notices it seems to have something in it, though it is difficult to say what exactly. Some kind of strange sludge? Regardless, he moves it over to the aftcastle with him, standing between it and a wall. He is about to cast a spell, but suddenly Mark appears, offering him a harpoon. Sigmund takes it and sets it down next to himself.

"I don't know what do you want, but I won't help you kill people without reason."

Mark is unimpressed. Or at least that's the way he looks - very difficult to read the guy, Sigmund finds. Oh well. Magic time!

[Sigmund's magic roll: 6]

He channels the magic from the piece of paper, willing a breeze to blow toward him. And a breeze appears! For a moment. Then it abruptly stops. Then it comes from another direction. Then it becomes like a miniature whirlwind. Then it stops again. Then air suddenly flies away from Sigmund's vicinity as though Sigmund were some kind of atmospheric pariah. And then a powerful wind moves the air back into place with a loud whoosh. And then the whole process repeats itself, with the degree of each step varying each time. Quite the pickle, Sigmund supposes.


In the icy waters of the Sea of Pleasant Winds...

Scott moves out of the water as quickly as possible, grabbing the highly flammable barrel of grease and moving over to the ship that provided him with the highly dangerous honey, setting it down in the spot where the barrel of honey formerly was. He then sets the thing on fire.

[Pyromaniac destruction roll: 2]

As the grease begins to burn in the barrel, he slowly steps off the ship. He notices that the barrel doesn't appear to be falling apart or anything - the grease fire is currently contained within it. Hm. Not as effective as one might have hoped. Also, somebody appears to have seen him. A sailor on the ship, looks like.

"Hey! What's happening here? Why is that barrel on fire? And where's the damn honey gone?"


Inside the Webbed Toe...

Kevin keeps conversing with his two current companions while the two other mages telekinetically wrestle over a particularly heavy oaken table. He finally busts out his bookstore heist story.

"Well, the chair golem guy that I'm looking for pulped a first load of guards and made them into sandwiches, which another companion then ate. Then I killed some more, but after we managed to break into the attic where the guy stored his books, there was a whole load of them and I got magically catapulted into a nearby building. I played dead, which isn't hard without a heartbeat, and got buried, then dug up, then they wanted to cut me up due to my... special structure and I got released because the pulping of all of my limbs was enough of a punishment. Some smith guy fixed me up. We have some sort of undead skeletal surgeon, but he's... a little odd. If he repairs you, you end up a monstrosity. And I'm a jester, not a freak!"

"Quite the tale," Lizzie says after a pause, toying with a wine glass she clearly can't drink from.

"Could use some embellishment. Maybe you should have one of these," Stephen says, digging around in one of his pockets and producing something very similar to a signet ring, but with some kind of mechanism where a gem would normally be, offering it to Kevin. "Put this on. It's a nifty little thing, it is. An 'inebriation dial'. You turn the knob it has and parties happen, heh."

"Definitely in my top 3 of this century's inventions, I must say. I would have offered one of mine, but I seem to have forgotten to bring more than one, sadly. Anyway, back to the current topic, you were caught, you say? What about the rest of your associates? Did you acquire what you wanted?"
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Xanmyral

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8172 on: January 02, 2014, 09:48:42 pm »

Hm. Always something it seems. Seeing Artiste's worsening state, Morton can't just leave him to suffer when he can possible do something to help. Living in rural Camellia means allergies for some of its residents after all, one must know their way around such helpful herbal teas.

"Good Master Artiste, are you perhaps allergic to anything else? I believe I can perhaps brew you a tea to help fight your suffering, nature's natural remedies tend to work wonders I've found."

If Artiste doesn't protest more tea (what strange man of class would however), the desk will check his tea ingredients for anything that would work and will get to work on brewing a special cup of herbal/ginger/mint/(insert allergic response reliever that Artiste isn't allergic to) all-natural tonic for his allergies.

Xantalos

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8173 on: January 02, 2014, 09:58:07 pm »

FOUL MEATFLESH I WAS GOING TO USE THAT

Punch him in the throat!
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killerhellhound

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 5: The Path of Dreams
« Reply #8174 on: January 02, 2014, 10:56:15 pm »

Mark goes over to Justine, and through writing asks where the two we are missing are then goes to fetch them
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Fluttershy jumps onto TCM, giving him a hug. "~Yay~"*Player TCM has left the server. Reason: HHHHNNNNNGGGG-

We Madmen are very ingenious.  Sometimes it just takes just a little less sanity to pull off something completely awesome.
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