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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 665084 times)

Yoink

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #585 on: June 06, 2014, 06:49:01 pm »

Quote from: No Juan Ever
I hate tacos.



Courtesy of the local taqueria.
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Booze is Life for Yoink

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you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

hops

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #586 on: June 06, 2014, 06:52:27 pm »

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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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scrdest

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #587 on: June 07, 2014, 06:57:46 am »

'Jehovah's Witnesses are getting more and more annoying lately. They think that just because they dressed up as cops and wave a warrant around I'll open the door for them.'
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We are doomed. It's just that whatever is going to kill us all just happens to be, from a scientific standpoint, pretty frickin' awesome.

Jopax

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #588 on: June 07, 2014, 07:07:04 am »

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


:C

Edit:

And before I forget, this one doubles as a very very terrible pickup line:

"You must be Irish girl, because my penis is Dublin."

:CCCCC
« Last Edit: June 07, 2014, 07:08:37 am by Jopax »
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Comrade P.

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #589 on: June 07, 2014, 07:16:56 am »

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
In Soviet and post-Soviet Russia, sciencist is the hero of this joke.
« Last Edit: June 07, 2014, 07:41:36 am by Comrade P. »
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Sigs

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Dutchling

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #590 on: June 07, 2014, 07:20:08 am »

Those poor kids from Sandy Hook, they wanted books but all they got were magazines.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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miauw62

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #591 on: June 07, 2014, 07:31:22 am »

(This joke works best when I use I)
I was walking down the street one day, when I saw a black man carrying a TV. I thought, "Hey, that looks like mine!", so I hurried home, but luckily mine was still there, polishing my shoes.
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Jopax

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #592 on: June 07, 2014, 07:33:09 am »

Why is that black man all orange?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Helgoland

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #593 on: June 07, 2014, 08:48:15 am »

Dutchling, you're terrible. That's a compliment.
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Redzephyr01

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #594 on: June 08, 2014, 02:10:04 pm »

A guy joined a club. At every meeting, the newest club member must bring a food specified by the club leader. The club leader told the guy to bring raisins. When the guy went to the meeting, he forgot to bring the raisins, so he got kicked out. When one of his friends asked him why he wasn't at the meeting, he said "they banned me for no raisin!"
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Dutchling

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #595 on: June 08, 2014, 05:14:03 pm »

Yesterday I went to a temporary tattoo parlour to get a tattoo. After it wouldn't wash off this morning I went back to complain, but the tattoo parlour wasn't there.
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hops

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #596 on: June 08, 2014, 06:23:30 pm »

What do you call it when the author of Harry Potter falls down the stairs?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What do you call it when the author of Harry Potter used a paddle boat?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

EDIT:

What do you call the game where you toss a heavy ball at the author of HP?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What do you call it when the author of HP is angry?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What is the author of HP's preferred method of athleticism test?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What do you call it when the author of HP lie for a joke?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 08, 2014, 06:33:46 pm by Objective »
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Dutchling

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #597 on: June 08, 2014, 07:33:19 pm »

How is that a Portal joke?
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Dutchling

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #598 on: June 08, 2014, 08:27:59 pm »

I'm confused.
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Redzephyr01

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #599 on: June 08, 2014, 08:28:47 pm »

Doug Rattmann is a minor character in Portal.
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