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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 646863 times)

hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3030 on: December 30, 2015, 01:04:03 am »

Well, for some value of derail, that wasn't.  It was clearly expected that the feather fall scrolls be used on somebody for this purpose.

Also, no, you're resolving the plot instead of wrecking it in Negative Hendersons, but there's some level of WTFery either way.

Well, we're certainly using the Henderson on the topic, otherwise I'd continue.

Unless we continue discussing while posting shit jokes, but I'm not that good.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

TheBiggerFish

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3031 on: December 30, 2015, 01:09:53 am »

Bah, this is a shitty joke, we're discussing how a hypothetical joke being defeated measures up on an arbitrary numbering system with exactly two clear benchmarks on the wrong side of the scale to work from.
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Egan_BW

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3032 on: December 30, 2015, 01:10:51 am »

Three stereotypes and Old Man Henderson are on a plane. The plane has no problems and is flying just fine.
Old Man Henderson throws the plane out the door, saying "we have plenty of these where I'm from."
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3033 on: December 30, 2015, 01:11:24 am »

HEY, THAT WAS FUNNY, BAD.
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It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3034 on: December 30, 2015, 01:12:19 am »

HEY, THAT WAS FUNNY, BAD.

+1

I shall also sig it, because yeah.

Edit: With 16 character remaining, no less.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

TheBiggerFish

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3035 on: December 30, 2015, 01:13:53 am »

I need to make a sig thread post...
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Egan_BW

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3036 on: December 30, 2015, 01:19:27 am »

What?! It was funny?! And sigged?! I do not understand! It was just a tired joke! I didn't even have a punchline!
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Down at the bottom of the ocean. Beneath tons of brine which would crush you down. Not into broken and splintered flesh, but into thin soup. Into just more of the sea water. Where things live that aren't so different from you, but you will never live to touch them and they will never live to touch you.

hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3037 on: December 30, 2015, 01:22:16 am »

What?! It was funny?! And sigged?! I do not understand! It was just a tired joke! I didn't even have a punchline!

Old Man Henderson is the punchline! He's like Chuck Norris, Jack Bauer and The Most Interesting Man In The World all rolled into one.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

TheBiggerFish

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3038 on: December 30, 2015, 01:22:24 am »

Old Man Henderson throws the plane out the door, saying "we have plenty of these where I'm from."
Sounds like a punchline to me, right Rupert?
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It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Kot

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3039 on: December 30, 2015, 01:23:13 am »

It's the Terrible Jokes thread man, in theory you did exactly what you were expected to.
What?! It was funny?! And sigged?! I do not understand! It was just a tired joke! I didn't even have a punchline!

Old Man Henderson is the punchline! He's like Chuck Norris, Jack Bauer and The Most Interesting Man In The World all rolled into one.
He can be all those, but he'll never be Sly Marbo, or the Universe would cease to exist.
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Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3040 on: December 30, 2015, 02:31:32 pm »

Here's a good one I just found here

"You have hree apples and Jamal takes two of them. Whzt color is Jamal?"
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Tack

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3041 on: December 30, 2015, 03:02:20 pm »

Elf dwarf Orc human dragon one makes me think of rich guy smart guy, old guy, schoolkid, plane.

Only three parachutes, "I'm too rich to die", "I'm too smart to die", 'you're too young to die'
- "don't bother. Rich guy took my schoolbag".


---
What's brown and hairy and deadly when it falls out of trees?
A Gorilla.

What's even deadlier?
An Angry Gorilla.

Why is it angry?
It just got nailed by a coconut.

How many gorillas does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One gorilla. Many lightbulbs.

What time is it when a gorilla is sitting on your fence?
Time to get a new fence.

What do you give a 300lb gorilla?
Whatever the fuck it wants.

Why did the gorilla cross the road?
It didn't want to seem like a chimpansy.
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Sonlirain

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3042 on: December 30, 2015, 03:26:10 pm »

Those remind me of the jokes spoken by Erasmus in the first Quest for glory.

Have you heard the joke about the witches broom?
No?
How odd it's sweeping the valley!

He had like 7 different jokes that loop and most of them were puns. Can't really recall much beyond the broom of doom one.
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IcyTea31

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3043 on: December 30, 2015, 04:34:22 pm »

What do you give a 300lb gorilla?
Whatever the fuck it wants.
Did you know one can legally, even as a civilian, buy military APCs and even tanks for personal use? Question is, where may one drive that 30-ton heavily armoured tracked vehicle? Where ever the fuck one wants.
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Spehss _

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3044 on: December 30, 2015, 06:26:28 pm »

Here's a good one I just found here
Heh. Lots of shitty jokes here but I found one that's not bad.

A man walks into a library and says, " Do you have any books on poor eyesight?"
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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