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Author Topic: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 3: Hogwarts woulda been cheaper.  (Read 38724 times)

Darvi

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Its people sank into
debauchery and sloth.


Although, can you blame them with that much moolah?

The Lord became angry at
this and summoned the
Prince of Darkness,
ruler of the Underworld.


But gord said no,
so some random schmuck named Lucifon
was sent out instead.

The mortals overwhelmed the demonic invaders,
and retaliated by flooding their home with magma.
Because of this, the demons were fled into the desert,
where nobody else wanted to live.

But the fighting was not over yet.
Many a warrior wanted to fight Lucifon, and kick him while he was down.
One of them was some swordfighter called Wymar Sane.



Why do you insist on fighting?
It has been divinely  ordained that I attack this decadent capital.
It is of no concern of yours. I only killed the dwarves, anyway.
You misunderstand. I didn't fight for them.
The bragging rights were all I was after.
You do not wish to destroy me?
Eh.

And without a trace, Lucifon disappeared into the desert.

---

Looks like we've got a winner.
Wait, there was a competition?
Nah, people just wanted to kick the guy's ass before somebody beats them to it.
So I get nothing?
I could hire you as a hero of the realm, if you want.
Basically you save shit and get no respect whatsoever for it.
What's the pay?
500 gold per month.
That's not a lot.
It's not like you have a family to feed or anything.
Aight. Deal!

---

yo
What?
it's me, gawd
Yo dawg. Whassup?
i need a favor
Why?
i knocked up this chick
Ew. Too much information!
and now i want you to look after the kid
Uhm. No.
did you say you want me to smite you?
Fine, I get the hint. So what do I do now?
wait let me get her

Dude, she has no clothes!
what now?
Ya know, the things we wear?
oh, i thought those grow naturally on you
How am I gonna explain bringing a naked girl to my home?
i dunno
Listen.
I hate you.
you're welcome


I finished playing Live-A-Live this morning, so I felt like playing something completely different for a change. Considering how Bay12 has THE BEST DAMN PARENTS EVER, I figured we might try to raise a child. Probably into some sort of genocidal supervillain or something.

Princess Maker 2 is  a game by Gainax Studios (You probably never heard of them before), and revolves about taking care of your adopted daughter of gawd. That includes sending her to classes, make her do part time work, have her kill monsters in the surrounding areas and generally being an incredibly shitty dad.
We can totally do that, right?

First, she needs some things. Other than clothes, that is.
  • A first name. I mean I'm probably gonna call her Kid or something since I'm bad with names but it might confuse other people and gawd apparently didn't bother with this tidbit.
  • A birthdate. As far as I can tell, this only influences your daughter's patron diety and how much time she has before the first harvest festival. The festival's in October, so shortly after that would probably be optimal.
  • A blood type. Being a demigawdess, she probably doesn't really have one, but we gotta write something on her birth certificate, right?
« Last Edit: May 24, 2013, 09:17:22 am by Darvi »
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Reudh

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Oh my gord!
« Reply #1 on: May 22, 2013, 12:26:27 pm »

Firstname - Darvina, the Chosen One
Birthdate - we'll go with your suggestion of November.
Blood Type - Gawd Type. (ABABAB negative)

shadenight123

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Oh my gord!
« Reply #2 on: May 22, 2013, 12:29:34 pm »

First Name: Scythe
Birthdate: 30 of December, the day the old year dies.
Blood Type: 0 (For we are Omega)

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“Well,” he said. “We’re in the Forgotten hunting grounds I take it. Your screams just woke them up early. Congratulations, Lyara.”
“Do something!” she whispered, trying to keep her sight on all of them at once.
Basileus clapped his hands once. The Forgotten took a step forward, attracted by the sound.
“There, I did something. I clapped. I like clapping,” he said. -The Investigator And The Case Of The Missing Brain.

Xantalos

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Oh my gord!
« Reply #3 on: May 22, 2013, 12:38:13 pm »

Name: Potata
Birthdate: Whenever All Hallows Eve is.
Blood Type: Bacon
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Darvi

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We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2013, 02:19:27 pm »

After some lengthy discussions with my compatriots (most of which was me trying to tell them that I am not a sick pervert, until gawd passed by and defused the situation with a well-aimed brofist to the face), I decided to call the girl Scythe. It's like Sheathe, but without all the dangerous innuendo involved!
The guys also informed me that the day was the 16th November, and at that opportunity I informed one of them in turn that the year does, in fact, end on the 31st December.
The blood type we decided on was B "for bacon, because everyone loves bacon and you want her to be loved, right?"

As for me, my name is Wymar Sane, my birthday is the 22nd May, and I'm 23 years old. It's positively depressing how old I've gotten.



Years into the future... but not many


It's been a year now since I've adopted Scythe. It wasn't easy, but luckily I've had help from my servant from the pastfuture, Cube.
*boop*
He's awesome. He can fire maser beams, hack computers, perform surgery, shoot goldfishes...
Referred-to functions have previously been uninstalled to clear the space necessary for my voice synthesizers. *ping*
Dammit!

Scythe's been doing pretty well, and now that she's finally 10 years old, she has officially entered the competence zone and ready for real life.


Alright, I guess. Just let me take a look at her stats first.
Stats? What's that?
Don't worry, about that, you'll understand soon enough.


She's relatively tough, intelligent, and quite charismatic. I am actually almost proud of her.
Only almost?
Your time has only begun, kid. Just wait until you start improving. You'll be amazing in no time.


Less important information is stored here. She's a scorpio, so her patrons are Vriska Serket and Hades.
Daddy, who's Hades?
Hades' the god of the dead and the underworld. That might sound nasty, but he's actually a pretty chill guy.



Hey Cube.
*beep*
Why are her... measurements here?
Measurements are beneficial for the acquisition of new garments.
Oh, I guess that makes sense? It's still extremely creepy though.
*buzz*
Now, what should we put on the schedule?
1.She can attends courses in school.

2.She can perform work in exchange for currency.

3.She can travel the globe in search of adventure.

4.She can go into standby mode and cool down her processor.
So, learning, working, fighting, or chillaxing. Geez, I wonder what a ten-year-old with barely any coin to her name can do in this situation.
Daddy, you're not going to make me fight horrible monsters are you?
Please don't ruin the surprise...


So we gotta set a schedule for the next few weeks. The numbers indicate how much gold an activity costs, respectively how much Scythe gets paid. Per day. Schooling is expensive, so I'd suggest farming first to rack up some easy cash. Your call, though.
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Flying Dice

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2013, 02:25:22 pm »

Even though there will only ever be one Princess Maker 2 LP engraved in my memory, PTW.  ;)
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1. Game Parameters -> Reduced Height Windows.
2. Lock taskbar to the right side of your desktop.
3. Run Resize Enable

Xantalos

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #6 on: May 22, 2013, 02:25:47 pm »

DO DA FAHMING
FOR MONAY
(farming for money)
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SomeStupidGuy

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #7 on: May 22, 2013, 02:28:22 pm »

Put her to work on the farms. We ain't having no layabout for a daughter. >:I
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Just Some Guy

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #8 on: May 22, 2013, 02:39:19 pm »

Science, Tactics, Protocol, and Fencing.
I really want her to become some sort of radical politician.

CognitiveDissonance

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #9 on: May 22, 2013, 02:41:45 pm »

Spoiled princess only. We need to prepare her for marriage and ruling the kingdom.

Only work in church and babysitting, and train up dancing, protocol, painting, poetry and science. A bit of magic later on.
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Come and be amazed by this wonderful menagerie! Draw your own! Bring your favorite! The [Forgotten Beast Art Contest] is open for business!
Now also available - [The Legendary Artifact Art Contest]! It menaces! It has rings! It has craftsdwarfship!
I have a [YouTube] channel! It has Let's Plays and other stuff.

Karlito

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #10 on: May 22, 2013, 02:43:31 pm »

Because hard farm labor is just the thing for a 10 year old girl!

We might actually make more money if we send her to do one of the easier jobs.
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Darvi

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #11 on: May 22, 2013, 02:44:19 pm »

I've heard that farming is one of the easier jobs. But eh.
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Neonivek

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #12 on: May 22, 2013, 02:47:08 pm »

500 for killing the king of demons? You got WAAAAAAAAAAY ripped off sir... even within this setting.
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SomeStupidGuy

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #13 on: May 22, 2013, 02:48:29 pm »

Because hard farm labor is just the thing for a 10 year old girl!

We might actually make more money if we send her to do one of the easier jobs.
But hard farm labor builds character!
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Girlinhat

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Re: We're playing Princess Maker 2! Part 1: Daughter of Gawd
« Reply #14 on: May 22, 2013, 02:50:38 pm »

Just send her into the desert.  It'll build character.  Probably.

Besides, as long as she's in the desert you don't have to pay for her food.
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