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Author Topic: The Forgotten Art: Approaching the Nexus  (Read 256936 times)

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #150 on: September 13, 2013, 12:37:29 pm »

Halesey, while getting pulled perilously close to the vortex, realizes a few things. Firstly, that the human mind can come up with the most interesting things as it is faced with what may or may not be certain doom. Secondly, he finds that adversity is a most wonderful motivator.

[Halesey's body roll: 2]

Thirdly, after he has hurriedly removed his precious trousers, he realizes that he has been pulled into the bloody vortex before he could properly take advantage of either of those things, plunging into potato hell right after the poor dude before him. This, he finds, does not bode well for the prospect of finding any drainpipes. He also notices that he seems to be slowly gravitating away from the vortex's mouth. And that there seems to be some sort of cookie-based pipe floating freely not too far from here.

Kat, having caught a brief glimpse of what Halesey was doing before he was pulled into potato hell, realizes that it... might not actually be a bad idea. At least, it's as good an idea as any. Better than what she's got, anyhow. It might be madness. In fact, it is madness.

But hey, sanity's something you gotta lose eventually in the magical world, right? Kat, still clutching the drainpipe, quickly removes her pants and ties them around the life-saving fixture, somewhat regretting her choice of wardrobe today. She reaches for the portal, finding that her hand barely reaches the vortex.

It is at this point that Elizabeth, possibly led astray by her admiration of her wonderful new hat, finally arrives, only to see a giant vortex of potatoes and a half-naked Kat reaching toward it from what she can only assume is some kind of rudimentary trouser-rope.

"What the actual fuck. How. Just how."

Kat looks at her suddenly, realizing a flaw in her plan. Their eyes meet. Elizabeth is initially confused, but there is something in her look, something altogether unquantifiably persuasive and extremely urgent, something that tells her that this is a brand new world.

A brand new world where she is about to remove her pants and utilize them to save what may, in due time, become her very dear friends or at the very least not entirely hated colleagues. She slips out of her trenchcoat, then aids Kat in the brave rescue attempt, which, as mentioned, involves the timely removal of her pants. She does this, then breaks into a sprint toward Kat.

[Elizabeth's body roll: 1-->2-1]

She is, however, like at least one of her colleagues, completely unprepared for the pull of the vortex, slipping on the wet ground and landing rather hard on the pavement as the potatoes pull her into their infernal grasp - as the confusion in her head clears, she finds that she is at the brink of the vortex, rather near Kat yet closer to the vortex, and getting pulled in fast. It is cold, wet and dangerous on the pavement, particularly for one without anything to cover up their lower halves.

Inside the vortex, not too far from Halesey, in fact, Larry contemplates what to do. Clearly, there are plenty of options. However, most of them are quite terrible, so he guesses he'll just swim for the exit in the terrible tide of potatoes.

[Larry's body roll: 1-->1-1]

This proves to be a bad idea, as he is immediately swept off by the earthy things upon leaving his snug little barrier, the tubers smashing into him like a tsunami and washing him into the eldritch depths of the dimension, further from the exit than ever before. He looks around for the vortex, but finds nothing even vaguely resembling a sign of it - not even the most distant glimmer.

Truly, he is quite lost.

Spoiler: GM Note (click to show/hide)
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Toaster

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #151 on: September 13, 2013, 01:05:32 pm »

I NO RITE


Well, surely a little magic couldn't make things worse.


Storm of filthy fans, go!  Knock some taters out of the way!
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
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lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #152 on: September 13, 2013, 01:40:54 pm »

It was time for the plan.

Meditate ferociously on the concept of potato vortex. Do not cast potato vortex, but prepare mind by this calming magical ritual to summon the most powerful vortex of potatoes that has yet existed. Meditate thus in the tuber maelstrom for an entire turn, and revel in my increasing nudity. Prepare to become the potato vortex. Prepare to become the archmage of potato. Hold my open folder tight to my chest, raise it to my eyes, call on its mighty power, and submit.
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Errol

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #153 on: September 13, 2013, 01:46:21 pm »

I AM NEVER LETTING YOU CAST THIS SPELL AGAIN THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA

Cast a Bountiful Portal of Frozen Napkins somewhere far enough away, outside the potato vortex. Retrieve pants. Put on pants. If I'm going to tuber hell, then it's properly dressed.

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lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #154 on: September 13, 2013, 01:53:53 pm »

((You got one turn to stop me casting it again dude :) ))
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Errol

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #155 on: September 13, 2013, 03:28:10 pm »

((Well, Liz is hardly aware of whatever happens inside your vortex. If she knew, her brain would probably bluescreen.))
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Dwarmin

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #156 on: September 15, 2013, 04:31:17 am »

Action: Keep hanging onto that pipe! Offer rescue rope to anyone who can snag it...
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Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #157 on: September 16, 2013, 01:40:33 pm »

Larry, trapped in an endless sea of potatoes, tries to clear the spot out a bit the only way he currently can - via a storm of filthy fans!

[Larry's affinity roll: 6-->5+1]

His malleable mind orients itself, mental pathways temporarily reorganizing themselves, each firing off the spell in turn, his entire being momentarily becoming a conduit of magic - fans of absolutely sublime filthiness appear all around him, spreading as far as the eye can see, swatting potatoes left and right, mixing up the tuber tide and pushing against it, not to mention dirtying all the potatoes in a most unnatural fashion. This does not improve visibility, Larry finds, but it does make him feel like he's doing something other than getting inexorably pulled to some form of doom.

In fact, he appears to have a guest. Several, actually. They look like people, except made completely of potatoes and somewhat larger than the average bloke. Their expressions are unreadable, but Larry gets the feeling they are not entirely pleased about something.

Halesey, probably in slightly less trouble than his compatriot, takes a magical approach, but in an altogether different direction. Rather than try unpredictable magic, he does the wise thing and prepares. He tries to meditate upon the vortex, to find some form of sublime meaning in it and himself, to become like the noble potato vortex in his mind and attune oneself to it.

However, somewhere along the way the nagging little voice in his head that has kept chanting "this is a load of bollocks" pretty much every time somebody's tried to read his aura or some such rot takes hold like some sort of skeptical shark monster from the rationalistic depths, refusing to let go and successfully distracting him from any new-age mumbo-jumbo that would unhinge a lesser man. So, not much progress on that front, he finds.

Elizabeth, slightly less doomed than the others but also lacking pants at the moment, decides to strike out at the world in a curious gesture.

[Elizabeth's affinity roll: 1-->1+1]

However, in her de-trousered state, she can't help but be distracted by the vortex right next to her, which plays havoc with her thoughts, which in turn plays havoc with the spell she is trying to cast! She feels her chest tingle a little, then suddenly split open, a whole lot of frozen napkins rapidly flying out of it as she yelps in panic. The portal overflows, frozen napkins tumbling all around her. Now she is not only without pants, she is also literally freezing her hindquarters off on a bed of ice.

[Elizabeth's body roll: 5-1]

Fortunately, she finds that naked flesh adheres somewhat well to ice, which, while displeasing, currently keeps her from passing into another dimension. Oddly enough, her torso doesn't seem to be harmed in any way aside from what may develop into mild frostbite. Elizabeth uses the slight breather and persuasive stimulus to regain a little ground and put her pants back on.

Kat, quite satisfied where she is right now (as in, not in the middle of a frozen napkin eruption), keeps hanging on to her pants that are rather securely tied to the pipe, and offers a helpful hand of salvation to Elizabeth, who seems to be having a slight frozen napkin problem, to put it in civilized terms.
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Dwarmin

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #158 on: September 16, 2013, 01:46:44 pm »

((Man, this portal is lasting a long time...and, looks like Larry is about to be mashed by potato elementals. How embarrassing.))

Action: Love the pipe. Never gonna give it up. Never gonna let it down.
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Toaster

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #159 on: September 16, 2013, 02:04:59 pm »

Larry growled.  Surely the path to power didn't involve potato men.  Too bad there weren't any videotape demon knights around- one could chop them up and turn them into fries.  Heh heh.

Search for the exit!  Put up another Cookie Barrier if the potato men threaten.


Spoiler: Sheet (click to show/hide)
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #160 on: September 16, 2013, 02:41:25 pm »

((Man, this portal is lasting a long time...and, looks like Larry is about to be mashed by potato elementals. How embarrassing.))

Actually, I forgot to roll for something for Kat this turn - she, unlike Elizabeth, notices that the portal looks a lot flimsier now.
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lawastooshort

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #161 on: September 16, 2013, 03:13:11 pm »

Oh god... not the time to not believe, man...

Halesey searched about. His trousers were nowhere to be seen. There... seemed to be no solution, if he cannot focus his mind and make things right. He'd wanted to save his briefly-known comrade, but all thoughts of others had now left his potato-battered mind. He thought he could rely on his wits to save him; they usually had. But this time his so-called wits had led him semi-naked into what was most definitely potato hell, and his fail-proof plan had failed.

Well, at least, one part of it had failed, it seemed. He couldn't bring up the mental potato. He couldn't become the vortex.

But he couldn't bloody reach the trousers he'd so gleefully caste off either, so he figured he might as well just try to summon the most ultimate power he'd ever known in what seemed like it was going to be his short life.

He hoped at least that the spirit contained in his grimoire would recognise, would appreciate the effort to focus, and the sincere belief that he'd tried to feed into what he was about to do.

He hoped it wouldn't fail like the more than half the times he'd tried before.

He closed his eyes and felt the potato vortex form.

It felt a bit like wearing wet jeans.

Unless by some miracle I fall out of the vortex (in which case drop to my knees and praise my book wholeheartedly whilst rubbing my face in it and opening myself to it body and soul) cast, one final time, Potato Vortex. Assuming it works, leap into the vortex within the vortex. If it fails, try to... leap out of the vortex, and try not to whimper in despair.

Spoiler: Sheet (click to show/hide)

((Really sorry about the portal dudes... Um.))
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Errol

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #162 on: September 16, 2013, 05:45:39 pm »

Remove self from vortex victinity. Remove portal from chest area.
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Harry Baldman

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #163 on: September 17, 2013, 11:36:31 am »

Kat, on her end, does her very best to not let go of the pair of pants securing her to the pipe. She is remarkably successful.

In slightly more interesting news, Larry becomes wary of the potato people all around him. They surely cannot mean him anything other than grievous harm. He attempts to swim off toward something like an exit.

[Larry's body roll: 1-->4-1]

By which it is meant that he just tumbles on without a very good idea of where he is going and why shouldn't he just go with the flow. The potato people, however, give chase!

[Finesse: Potato People vs. Larry: 2+1 vs. 3]

They act simultaneously, a particularly determined potato person lunging after Larry even as the latter tries his best to invoke another cookie barrier!

[Larry's affinity roll: 6-->2+1]

Larry is immediately encased in a solid capsule of cookies, arresting the progress of the mischievous potato people before they can get their tuber-encrusted hands all over him. Ha-hah! Let's see them get through that!

Halesey, slightly less bothered by the very element of potatoes, postulates that there is no problem a potato vortex can cause that in turn cannot be solved by a potato vortex. Since he doesn't seem to be falling out just yet, he opts to test this idea.

[Halesey's affinity roll: 5-1]

For a moment, he gets it - the potato vortex. It seems so elegant and simple, so very easy to put into practice. In an effortless motion, he points his arm outwards, and a potato vortex within the potato dimension appears! Oddly enough, it seems to work somewhat differently than expected - as in, it just looks to lead back to the world of the conventionally living. There's probably a lesson about the fabric of the multiverse in there, but Halesey doesn't have time to ponder it just yet. He wants out, and he wants out right now.

[Halesey's body roll: 3]

Swim as he might, he doesn't quite make it right to the mouth of the smaller vortex, which appears to lead to a place near to the alley, but he gets pretty close - he can almost poke his head right through it, actually. And this vortex doesn't seem to suck quite as hard as the other one, in both conventional senses.

It is at this point that he is violently shoved forward by what is very obviously a mighty hand, his body getting flung through the vortex and landing on some very wet pavement. The air feels quite fresh, at least compared to whatever air was in the potato dimension. Sure, it might have up to five times as much benzene in it than is legally permitted, but at least it's not choking him with massive amounts of potatoes.

At the larger and slightly more powerful vortex, Elizabeth does her best to get away safely.

[Elizabeth's body roll: 3-1]

She doesn't really get anywhere, partly because of all the frozen napkins and partly because of the attractive force of the vortex, and does actually seem to be slowly getting pulled in again! For a moment, she begins to feel mildly panicked, but then the portal does the world a favor and collapses already, rapidly decreasing in size and power until it is but a point, which then blinks out of existence. Elizabeth breathes a sigh of relief, then tries to somehow dismiss the frozen napkin portal on her chest.

[Elizabeth's affinity roll: 3+1]

As she focuses upon it, willing it to disappear and stop being such an ungodly hassle, it lessens in size slowly, and disappears eventually. The frozen napkins seem to be more permanent, even now littering the alley in great quantities.
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Dwarmin

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Re: The Forgotten Art: The Making of a Sanctum
« Reply #164 on: September 17, 2013, 11:48:15 am »

Kat stood up, rapidly pulling on her pants and glaring at the others.

"So, uh, about Larry...yeah...too bad...I don't know about all of you, but I'm going home before you all get me killed or...potatoe'd...I need a change of clothes, and more besides. Good luck with the bums."

She was still hanging onto the pipe.

Action: Time to get a bus ride back to my apartment! Party split!

((Honestly, I'm not quite sure what we're accomplishing in this game :P Lolrandom all the time. I just spent six turns holding onto a pipe.))
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