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Author Topic: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)  (Read 11327 times)

Xob Ludosmbax

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Come all, gather round, and you will hear the tale of Urvad Strangercanyon, the fiercest dwarf ever to lift an axe.

Urvad was born in a small settlement called Laboredowners in the year 786. 


Not long after he was born, he was visited by three werebeasts, and each time he fought the werebeast off and fled. 

Please, you mustn't think he was a coward for fleeing, for he was only a few months old and not yet strong enough to lift his axe. 

The very next year, a goblin slinked into Laboredowners, shoved Urvad into a sack, kidnapped the child, and imprisoned him.


While he was gone, the fates were not kind to Laboredowners.  The settlement was attacked by a vicious goblin war party.  Everyone was killed and their bodies desecrated by the savage invaders.  The settlement was destroyed.  We can only assume this is what gave Urvad his great hatred of goblins and fierce determination to protect his homeland.


After 4 years of goblin imprisonment, Urvad managed to escape; and after 7 more years of wandering, he found his homeland and discovered what had transpired in his absence. Upon seeing the devastation, Urvad vowed to protect his homeland and to never let anyone remove him from the land that was his birthright. 


Now, a dwarven vow is not a thing to be taken lightly.  It is said that the mountains themselves will move to get out of the way of a dwarf under a vow.  Had the goblins known of the vow Urvad had taken, perhaps they would have steered clear of the site.  Then again goblins are not know to be the most intelligent of creatures, so everything may have gone exactly the same.

As it was, a few short months after Urvad had reclaimed his land from the wilds, the goblins sent their horde to kill the child.  You must remember, Urvad is barely more than a child, only 12 years old. 

Followed by 5 more pages of "struck down".

Urvad must have entered a martial trance, for he claims no memory of what happened; only that he awoke drenched in blood and gore, and surrounded by a field of dead and dying goblins and trolls.  Out of the eighteen hundred invaders sent to kill a single 12 year old dwarf, over thirteen hundred lay dead. 

The next year, the goblins sent a second war party to investigate the unbelievable claims of a child slaughtering almost the entire mighty army.

And and additional 4 pages of "struck down".


The battle was fierce, but ultimately one sided.  This time the goblins had only sent seventeen hundred soldiers to take down the dwarf.  And over twelve hundred were slaughtered.  (That's a total of 2525 kills before the age of 14.)


☼Engraving☼ by BeruangSarkis


To this day, Urvad Strangercanyon lives there at Laboredowners with his 64 cats and 64 dogs and the rest of his livestock and fowl.




And his stats:


and so on...




World gen ended right after the second battle (750 years).  I've tried to recreate the world to let it run a few more years, but had some problems.

Only mods in play are Modest Mod + No Skill Rust

Save is here.

edit: Added BeruangSarkis's image, and fixed a misconception I had that EvilBob22 pointed out.  I didn't realize all members listed were actually at the battle.  Seems silly now.
Spoiler: Original Text (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: November 28, 2013, 07:17:47 am by Xob Ludosmbax »
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peregarrett

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #1 on: November 05, 2013, 11:52:03 pm »

He's 300 times more badass than King Leonidas!
Or I imagine him doing "Rambo-First Blood"-style, scattering invaders all over the place and killing them one by one.
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Did you know that the Russian word for "sock" is "no sock"?
I just saw a guy with two broken legs push a minecart with a corpse in it. Yeah.

zlob

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #2 on: November 06, 2013, 11:52:23 am »

And yet somehow my 7 dwarves can't take down an undead eagle...
I guess there are common dwarves and dwarven heroes.  :-\
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error: 'long long long' is too long

Zan Oltaridor

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #3 on: November 06, 2013, 12:10:10 pm »

Holy Mother of Armok....
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This thread is why I love dwarf fortress. We start at engravings of wagons and end up using necromancy to raise them from the dead, and were-wagons.
I jumped off a ramp in a cave and exploded.

Ruhn

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #4 on: November 06, 2013, 01:42:20 pm »

This is GREAT.

Karkov

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #5 on: November 06, 2013, 02:23:00 pm »

Reminds me a lot of Tholtig.  Too bad he didn't get genned all the way until he died of old-age, he might've actually beaten the top score if he had.

highmax28

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2013, 02:31:22 pm »

Good god, that dwarf is a hero of heroes!
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just shot him with a balistic arrow, i think he will get stuned from that >.>

"Guardian" and Sigfriend Of Necrothreat
Jee wilikers, I think Highmax is near invulnerable, must have been dunked in the river styx like achilles was.
Just make sure he wears a boot.

Lt_Alfred

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #7 on: November 06, 2013, 04:04:35 pm »

All hail Urvad Strangecanyon! God-Emperor of Dwarfkind.
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BlackMuffin

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #8 on: November 06, 2013, 05:31:24 pm »

My face when reading all of this:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This story moistens me.
You should try to find him in adventurer mode and try to kill him. Then fail miserably.

Although I don't know if that'd be possible since his home is a mountain hall, and those currently don't exist.
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Mod mod mod the raws!
Mod mod mod the raws!
SAY YES TO SLAVERY
A better fort for you and me!

peregarrett

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #9 on: November 06, 2013, 11:47:22 pm »

My face when reading all of this:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This story moistens me.
You should try to find him in adventurer mode and try to kill him. Then fail miserably.

Although I don't know if that'd be possible since his home is a mountain hall, and those currently don't exist.
He can start a new fortress and wait for Urvad arriving as migrant.
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Did you know that the Russian word for "sock" is "no sock"?
I just saw a guy with two broken legs push a minecart with a corpse in it. Yeah.

highmax28

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #10 on: November 07, 2013, 12:00:31 am »

My face when reading all of this:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This story moistens me.
You should try to find him in adventurer mode and try to kill him. Then fail miserably.

Although I don't know if that'd be possible since his home is a mountain hall, and those currently don't exist.
He can start a new fortress and wait for Urvad arriving as migrant.
He'd become the dwarf king at that point
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just shot him with a balistic arrow, i think he will get stuned from that >.>

"Guardian" and Sigfriend Of Necrothreat
Jee wilikers, I think Highmax is near invulnerable, must have been dunked in the river styx like achilles was.
Just make sure he wears a boot.

Proto105

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #11 on: November 11, 2013, 03:58:25 pm »

Good, he deserves being king
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BlackMuffin

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #12 on: November 11, 2013, 04:03:09 pm »

Good, he deserves being king
Well, thing is Kings generally tend to get people hammered.
And when people get hammered it's usually when they're a Legendary +5 [insert really useful skill right here].

So although he deserves to be in a high place of power, he doesn't deserve to be a douchebag. He should just be the most badass member of the fortress and leave it at that.
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Mod mod mod the raws!
Mod mod mod the raws!
SAY YES TO SLAVERY
A better fort for you and me!

Sutremaine

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #13 on: November 11, 2013, 06:51:40 pm »

Regen the world with the same seeds but a different finish year and see what happens.
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Honestly at the time, I didn't see what could go wrong with crowding 80 military Dwarves into a small room with a necromancer for the purpose of making bacon.

EvilBob22

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Re: Urvad Strangercanyon - The Most Baddest Ass Dwarf Ever (picture heavy)
« Reply #14 on: November 11, 2013, 08:28:59 pm »

Actually, if you look carefully, there were invader survivors in both battles.  If you think about it, that means that 500+ opponents each time decided they couldn't take on Urvad and ran.

The first battle (Urvad at age 12):
1813 invaders
  1030 un-nammed goblins
  210 un-nammed trolls
  573 named opponents; mostly goblins, but at least three humans and one dwarf
1308 killed
  all 1030 un-named goblins killed
  all 210 un-named trolls killed
  68 named opponents killed
505 fled from battle

The second battle (Urvad at age 13):
1734 invaders
  972 un-nammed goblins
  198 un-nammed trolls
  564 named opponents; mostly goblins, but at least four humans and one dwarf
1217 killed
  all 972 un-named goblins killed
  all 198 un-named trolls killed
  47 named opponents killed
517 fled from battle

Also of note, the dwarf "Usbu Citymenaces the Maligned Wheel of Throwers" was present in both battles, and survived both.  The same with the humans "Amxu Doomrhythm" and "Snodub Taxeddooms".  (There may be more, but that is all that is in the screenshots.)
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I will run the experiment to completion anyway, however. Even if the only reason why there is a punctured equilibrium in the fortress is because I have been brutally butchering babies
EDIT: I just remembered that dwarves can't equip halberds. That might explain why the squads that use them always die.
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