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Author Topic: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.  (Read 125575 times)

WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: A Public Service Announcement
« Reply #1080 on: February 25, 2014, 08:18:27 am »


Quote

Punch Dad the White in the face. Go on a business claiming rampage.
+1
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It's both constructive and cathartic. And it'll teach Grate how to delegate.
+1
+1

How do you guys fuck up quotes so badly? Jesus. I mean Grate.

Give Grate a book titled "How to be a good father for dummyz God-King children" so he learns to to be his own father and increase his own stats while we come up with more insane activities in the future for him to do that may or may not help increase his stats.
This is such a good idea. +1.
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Quote from: The Froggy Ninja
Young Masches: Fetch yonder blade!
Masches grabs his "sword." Navi gasps. Her aura flushes a pinkish hue and she flies out the window.

piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: A Public Service Announcement
« Reply #1081 on: February 25, 2014, 10:09:31 am »

[6]

....

I think grate just killed the player character.

I think you guys committed suicide via 7 year old. Admittedly, you committed suicide via ordering a god-blood infused 7 year old in power armor to punch you in the face, so you committed suicide in about the most metal, outrageous way possible.

Thats a thing.

WELP. Since you're dead and no one is gonna train grate, I don't see what else we can do but skip to the testing phase. And I was so hoping that you'd accidentally raise that lovecraftianism stat to the point of becoming an old one. Oh well.

Lets see here.

HATE Dappertude:3
Cynicismish:5
Businessness:-4
Determinational:8
LIKE Survivalous: 6
HATE Sporties:2
LIKE Schooliouses:12

The final stats, with the ones he hated and liked labeled.

Now for the end tests, otherwise known as high school.


GRATE JUST BARELY MANAGES TO FIND HIMSELF A PROM DATE, IRONIC CONSIDERING HIS HAREM OF GODDESSES, BUT APPARENTLY HE CAN'T TALK TO NORMAL MORTAL WOMEN VERY WELL! DAPPERTUDE TEST PASSED!

GRATE COMPLETELY FORGETS TO WEAR A CONDOM FOR THE TRADITIONAL PROM AFTER PARTY! ENJOY YOUR ACCIDENTAL CHILD! CYNICISMISH TEST FAILED!

GRATE DOESN'T MANAGE TO GET A SPOT ON THE GENERIC HIGHSCHOOL SPORTS TEAM AND NEVER LEARNS HOW TO DO 80'S MOVIE TRAINING MONTAGES! SPORTIES TEST FAILED!

GRATE GETS FUCK OFF ASTOUNDING GOOD GRADES. I MEAN THE FUCKER IS DISCOVERING FUCKING NEW LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE IN THE MIDDLE OF PER-ALGEBRA AND DURING FROG DISSECTION IN BIOLOGY HE INVENTS A 100% EFFECTIVE TREATMENT FOR PANCREATIC CANCER! HOLY FUCK! SCHOOLIOUSES TEST FUCKING PASSED.

TURNS OUT THAT GRATE AT LEAST DID ONE THING RIGHT FOR THAT PROM DATE! HE PICKED A GOOD WOMAN TO ACCIDENTALLY IMPREGNATE BECAUSE SHE'S A TOTAL BRO AND IS PRETTY DAMN CHILL ABOUT THE WHOLE THING. GRATE AND HER GET ALONG PERFECTLY AND EVERYTHING TURNED OUT BETTER THEN EXPECTED. SURVIVALOUS TEST PASSED!

TOO BAD ALL THOSE SMARTS AND COOL ASS WIFE CAN'T HELP GRATE LAND A GOOD JOB! THE MAN IS A ROCKET SURGEON WHO WORKS AS A WALMART GREETER. I GUESS EISENSTEIN WORKED AS A CLERK THOUGH, DIDN'T HE? BUSINESSNESS TEST FAILED!

GRATE, REALIZING THE HORRIBLE UNFULFILLING EXISTENCE AT HIS JOB AND THE FACT THAT HIS GREAT GENIUS SHALL NEVER BE ACCEPTED OR UNDERSTOOD, CONTEMPLATES SUICIDE. BUT THEN HE GETS OVER IT COMPLETELY AND LIVES OUT A STRONG, SIMPLE, HAPPY LIFE WITH HIS WIFE AND CHILD NAMED "WOOPS".
DETERMINATIONAL TEST PASSED!

4/7 TESTS PASSED!

YOUR CHILD RECEIVES A D- AT LIFE.


Kadzar

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1082 on: February 25, 2014, 10:28:25 am »

Dammit, I never got a chance to tell him vaginas are filled with bees.
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Doomblade187

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1083 on: February 25, 2014, 10:37:36 am »

I like to think that upon death, or some other point, Grate ascends to godhood at the top of a new mount Olympus with his wife and harem at his side while his child roans the earth.
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The Froggy Ninja

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1084 on: February 25, 2014, 10:38:58 am »

*in the afterlife*
DtW: I'm very disappointed in you son.
Grate: Nope. (Consumes soul. Goes off to rule Olympus with his wife and harem.)

Parisbre56

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1085 on: February 25, 2014, 10:54:22 am »

Not very important, since we would had failed the businessness check anyway, but shouldn't that final action had increased buinessness? Or something?

Anyway, good crazy job everyone. At least Grate got lucky in those final tests.

WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1086 on: February 25, 2014, 11:08:16 am »

Well, if we had twice the amount of actions instead of doing FUCK, we probably wouldn't have made a child that sucked at life.

Welp, at least he passed.
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Quote from: The Froggy Ninja
Young Masches: Fetch yonder blade!
Masches grabs his "sword." Navi gasps. Her aura flushes a pinkish hue and she flies out the window.

Toaster

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1087 on: February 25, 2014, 12:08:15 pm »

He's happy, and that's all that counts!


Now let's see how he does raising poor old Woops.
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piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1088 on: February 25, 2014, 12:15:22 pm »

He's happy, and that's all that counts!


Now let's see how he does raising poor old Woops.
I can give the rules to someone if they want to continue.

smurfingtonthethird

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1089 on: February 25, 2014, 06:30:04 pm »

NO.
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Xantalos

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smurfingtonthethird

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1091 on: February 25, 2014, 06:41:38 pm »

Man, grate was sposed to be the God-Emperor of mankind, plus the father of a new generation of gods. Y U DO THI-

Wait, the punching thing was my fault.

Shit.
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RIP Moot ;-;7 Sigtext!

piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1092 on: February 25, 2014, 07:02:36 pm »

If whats his name...uh...he plays stephen hawking in ER. Starts with a B. BFL?

Yeah if he wants to gm this thing he said I should make then I can give him the rules. Or someone else. Or not.

NAV

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1093 on: February 25, 2014, 07:49:40 pm »

How did you misspell both those names? It's STEPHEN HAWKING and BFEL.
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MarcAFK

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.
« Reply #1094 on: February 26, 2014, 12:07:54 am »

This was Grate. D:
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