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Reader count!  Do you read TLCM?  If so, pick your favorite character below!

Misty Kolnazom, the Greatest Cheesemaker Ever!
Reg Pashmad the Recruit
Gruzzlus Holt the Captain
Plumpy the Plump Helmet Man
Kulet Lokunnomel the Nun
Enir Twigappears the Overseer
Darkerdaffodil the Elf
Maynard the Mule
Other
Iron Owl the Iron Knight

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Author Topic: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 12/07/2022  (Read 1783963 times)

CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #180 on: March 09, 2014, 01:53:01 pm »

>After grabbing sword, waste a whole minute singing Tobuscus's "I can swing my sword" before using fastdwarf to instantly catch up with migrants.

AfellowDwarf

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #181 on: March 09, 2014, 02:34:20 pm »

+1 For the sudden musical piece. What's freedom if you don't exercise it?
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pruneytoes

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #182 on: March 09, 2014, 02:44:41 pm »

+1 to grab sword.

Let's get that sword, unless you guys wanna find out if throwing is as hilariously overpowered in this as it is in Adventure mode...

We could always throw the sword!
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Timeless Bob

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #183 on: March 09, 2014, 03:50:45 pm »

In westerns, the singing cowboy is the only way a posse gets from here to there in no time flat - those migrants probably don't have a singer yet - now's your chance!  Of course, if the migrants DO already have a singing cowboy (maybe the expedition leader?), then the way a single person travels across Westerns is by silhouette in huge setting sun with heat-haze all around.
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Rumrusher

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #184 on: March 09, 2014, 05:33:13 pm »

+1 to grab sword.

Let's get that sword, unless you guys wanna find out if throwing is as hilariously overpowered in this as it is in Adventure mode...

We could always throw the sword!
if we had a minecart we could have pushed it in the direction of the mayor at 100,000 force per tick causing the minecart to become a cannonball on wheels hell don't we have cheese wheels we could make a minecart out of the crate and some cheese and zip on by. if ye going to use fast dwarf to hit beyond [speed:0]  you better abuse the physics in [Speed:0] also you might want to have it applied to our character and not the entire fort or we still might not make it to the migrant wave.I suggest Superdwarf.lua for breaking barriers of FPS.
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MDFification

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #185 on: March 09, 2014, 07:14:25 pm »

Guys, we've already established that Misty's weapon of choice is her backpack. And as Headshoots proved, backpack>sword.
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catenate

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #186 on: March 09, 2014, 08:56:37 pm »

Guys, we've already established that Misty's weapon of choice is her backpack. And as Headshoots proved, backpack>sword.

While the backpack would have been a mace, or at least a sap, with the brick,
I think we've well established that Misty is a cheesemaker not a fighter.
Cheese rounds being large and heavy and thick (especially the dwarven kind),
she might think to grab it as a cheese cutter, not really thinking of it as a sword.
Cue people thinking that she's a recruit just because she has her cheese cutter
hanging from her belt(?).
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WillowLuman

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #187 on: March 09, 2014, 10:26:31 pm »

The whole argument so far is based on that we'll need to fight bogeymen, but bogeymen only attack those who travel alone. If we grab the sword (which again I have to say is bigger than she is!) we'll have to drag it the whole way, and thus won't be able to catch up with them. If we just run after them, though, we need not worry about bogeymen.
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Mr Space Cat

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #188 on: March 09, 2014, 10:46:58 pm »

Unless they already got too far away for us to catch up. We don't know how much time passed since the sweet dwarven box parkour incident, the discussion with the mayor, and Misty's escape.
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WillowLuman

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #189 on: March 09, 2014, 11:01:07 pm »

We're not going to get very far before the fortress guard comes looking for us if we drag a sword that's bigger than misty. Look at that thing:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I doubt she could even lift it, much less swing it.
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Mr Space Cat

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #190 on: March 09, 2014, 11:20:14 pm »

Isn't there only two people in the fortress guard anyway? One guy is old and the other's a crazy recruit who last we saw was busy attacking a stone column. We could probably outrun them both, and if the sword is too heavy or slows us down too much we could drop it and keep moving.

Wouldn't hurt to try and at least lift the sword, right?
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Loci

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #191 on: March 09, 2014, 11:48:53 pm »

What cheesemaker would ever have use for a sword! It's probably so old it doesn't even still work. Forget the sword; grab a cow. Migrants are allowed to bring pets, and nothing's more useful to a fort than a large grazer that can't be butchered.
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Talvieno

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #192 on: March 10, 2014, 01:12:51 am »

What cheesemaker would ever have use for a sword! It's probably so old it doesn't even still work. Forget the sword; grab a cow. Migrants are allowed to bring pets, and nothing's more useful to a fort than a large grazer that can't be butchered.
Misty doesn't have anything to lead the cow with (assuming she could even find one), and it'd likely slow her down enough that she couldn't catch up with the migrants. That's the big thing here.

My vote is go find some influential migrants to talk to and try to get in their good graces... particularly one that owns a cow or is a cheesemaker.


also, the sword is too big. Seriously, it's taller than she is. It's likely part of some statue and wouldn't cut butter anyway - let alone cheese.
Case in point: Look back above the sword. There's a helmed dwarf's head, part of a statue, upside down against the wall. You can even see the beard. That's what it's part of.
re-edit: Actually, that sword is way too small to be part of that statue... still, given how it's wrapped about with vines, I stand by how I said it won't cut anything. =p

Guys, we've already established that Misty's weapon of choice is her backpack. And as Headshoots proved, backpack>sword.
Unless you know martial dentistry like Fischer... which, Misty almost certainly doesn't.



Finally, that last image (with the ruins and grass) is made of win.
« Last Edit: March 10, 2014, 01:57:05 pm by Talvieno »
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CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #193 on: March 10, 2014, 07:52:40 am »

Heck, if we're bringing a cow into this:

>Misty, grab sword, mount cow, grab cowboy hat, ride dramatically into the sunrise that rose three hours ago. Catch up to migrants on the derpiest heifer in all of the mountain-homes looking like a badass from the distance, then up close falling over from the weight of your mighty legendary cheese-cutter.

WillowLuman

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #194 on: March 10, 2014, 12:43:26 pm »

In westerns, the singing cowboy is the only way a posse gets from here to there in no time flat - those migrants probably don't have a singer yet - now's your chance!  Of course, if the migrants DO already have a singing cowboy (maybe the expedition leader?), then the way a single person travels across Westerns is by silhouette in huge setting sun with heat-haze all around.
>Misty, grab sword, mount cow, grab cowboy hat, ride dramatically into the sunrise that rose three hours ago. Catch up to migrants on the derpiest heifer in all of the mountain-homes looking like a badass from the distance, then up close falling over from the weight of your mighty legendary cheese-cutter.
Guys...
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