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Reader count!  Do you read TLCM?  If so, pick your favorite character below!

Misty Kolnazom, the Greatest Cheesemaker Ever!
Reg Pashmad the Recruit
Gruzzlus Holt the Captain
Plumpy the Plump Helmet Man
Kulet Lokunnomel the Nun
Enir Twigappears the Overseer
Darkerdaffodil the Elf
Maynard the Mule
Other
Iron Owl the Iron Knight

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Author Topic: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 12/07/2022  (Read 1767241 times)

Manveru Taurënér

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #705 on: May 19, 2014, 05:10:16 pm »

-1 to calling a god Boatmurdered. Name has too many other associations. Let's make this lore fresh.
I concur. I'm fine with making it an obsidian elephant and synonym in reference, but literally calling it boatmurdered doesn't sit well with me either.
+1

Also seconding Raul's take on the goddess of wealth and gems as a raven.
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mate888

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #706 on: May 19, 2014, 07:24:13 pm »

-1 to calling a god Boatmurdered. Name has too many other associations. Let's make this lore fresh.
I concur. I'm fine with making it an obsidian elephant and synonym in reference, but literally calling it boatmurdered doesn't sit well with me either.

>Finally reach consensus on gods, by and large
>Awaiting next update
>Suddenly 2 days later people start to disagree on one of the gods


Guys...can't we just leave it like it was? Seemed to have some good support. Plus...
Just saying, we probably won't get an update 'til this is sorted out.
And so, the consensus was never reached and was doomed to an eternal limbo where people only discuss weather the god of war should be called BoatMurdered or {INSERT CRAPPY NAME HERE}
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My second turn's unnoficial goal was to turn everyone into vampires, and it backfired so bad, I ended up making the fort a more efficient, safer and friendlier place.
Apparently they evolved a taste for everything I love and care about

CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #707 on: May 19, 2014, 07:55:36 pm »

-1 to calling a god Boatmurdered. Name has too many other associations. Let's make this lore fresh.
I concur. I'm fine with making it an obsidian elephant and synonym in reference, but literally calling it boatmurdered doesn't sit well with me either.

>Finally reach consensus on gods, by and large
>Awaiting next update
>Suddenly 2 days later people start to disagree on one of the gods


Guys...can't we just leave it like it was? Seemed to have some good support. Plus...
Just saying, we probably won't get an update 'til this is sorted out.
And so, the consensus was never reached and was doomed to an eternal limbo where people only discuss weather the god of war should be called BoatMurdered or {INSERT CRAPPY NAME HERE}
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! WHAT HAVE I DONE!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

evictedSaint

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #708 on: May 19, 2014, 09:06:54 pm »

The two of you sit in comfortable silence while you digest all she's told you.


So...the gnomes get hats, you ask?

Oh, yes, Lokum replies.  That ancient mystery has long since been unraveled, thanks to the wonders of Dwarven Science!


You see, she explains, Armok is not an unkind God.  The gnomes, though one with nature and engineering alike, are frail and brittle.  Even the most shoddily made pig tail fiber sock dropped from above would easily crush their egg-shell like skulls.  Arkmok, in his infinite and all-encompassing wisdom, bestowed unto the gnomes the secret of conical hats to protect their feeble heads from the things that would bring about their deaths, like socks or a light rain.

Granted, this gift does not mean that GNOMES are Armoks favorite children, not at all!  Quite contrary, this simply shows that Armok loved us, the Dwarves, enough to make our skulls much firmer and well-made.  Our kind was made with love and diligence, whilst the gnomes and humans and others were built around us to provide a backdrop for the glory of the Dwarven race! You see?!

This is why Dwarves are the only ones who worship Armok.  Humans have their own pantheon of Gods (crafted in their own image, how vain!), the Orcs have a routine of bloody Ancestors (vile and disgusting, mind you!) and the Elves believe in a nonsensical "force".  That doesn't even make sense! That's not even a God!

Dwarves, though we all may worship our individual Gods, all pay homage to the All Father, the First, the God of Blood.

Of course, you must already know this, having your own deity of worship and whatnot.


Oh.

Um.


You don't have any Gods of Worship, you admit.


You've never selected your patron Gods, she exclaims?!  Why didn't you say so!  We can fix that right now.

There are seven Dwarven Gods for each Dwarven Civilization.  We, of course, have the best Gods of the three Dwarven Civilizations in the land.


Wise Bookfire, the Goddess of Knowledge and Rage, who has bestowed insight and madness upon those who draw her eye or ire,
Enchanting Cakewine, the Goddess of Deception and Drink, who delights in leading wandering adventurers astray,
Stoic Sunshield, the God of Children and Protection, who blesses the children of his followers and shields those who bear his sigil,
Bloody Stonetusk, the God of Fortresses and Conquest, the bloodiest of the seven and patron of Shielddawn itself,
Glittering Golddug, the Goddess of Wealth and Gems, who guides the hand of miners in the dark tunnels and brings them to the riches below,
Inconstant Urist CCCVI, God of Suicide and Reincarnation, who takes his own life at the end of each year only to be born anew the next,
And Humble Cowsea, Goddess of Cheese and Cattle, who keeps milk from spoil and the beast of the field docile.

Most Dwarves never take more than two of the seven as their patron, lest their worship be diluted to the point of inconsequence.


So tell me, young Dwarf, whose blessing do you seek?

next
« Last Edit: January 28, 2019, 01:37:05 pm by evictedSaint »
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Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #709 on: May 19, 2014, 09:11:25 pm »

Sunshield and Cowsea, obviously.

Sunshield, protection could be useful for a cheese maker...
And Cowsea, because cheese.
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Dwarfy

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story)
« Reply #710 on: May 19, 2014, 09:33:26 pm »

Wise Bookfire, the Goddess of Knowledge and Rage, who has bestowed insight and madness upon those who draw her eye or ire,
Enchanting Cakewine, the Goddess of Deception and Drink, who delights in leading wandering adventurers astray,
Stoic Sunshield, the God of Children and Protection, who blesses the children of his followers and shields those who bear his sigil,
Bloody Stonetusk, the God of Fortresses and Conquest, the bloodiest of the seven and patron of Shielddawn itself,
Glittering Golddug, the Goddess of Wealth and Gems, who guides the hand of miners in the dark tunnels and brings them to the riches below,
Inconstant Urist CCCVI, God of Suicide and Reincarnation, who takes his own life at the end of each year only to be born anew the next,
And Humble Cowsea, Goddess of Cheese and Cattle, who keeps milk from spoil and the beast of the field docile.

Most Dwarves never take more than two of the seven as their patron, lest their worship be deluded to the point of inconsequence.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

So tell me, young Dwarf, whose blessing do you seek?

Glory to Dwarfystokzka, another masterful post! I must say, this tale is strongly pulling me in.

Sunshield and Cowsea, obviously.

Sunshield, protection could be useful for a cheese maker...
And Cowsea, because cheese.

I agree. Of course Cowsea is the clear first choice, being goddess of cheese. Sunshield could also be helpful, given the...light tumble of earlier.

+1
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CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #711 on: May 19, 2014, 10:14:41 pm »

Bookfire to acquire access to secret, arcane arts of cheesemaking and cheesemaking apparatus. Also, to strengthen friendship with Uristodel. :) 'Tis good to be friends with an engineer, who knows when you will need help making an automated milker so you can more efficiently get the requisite ingredients for cheese.

Raul351

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #712 on: May 19, 2014, 10:21:51 pm »

Since we're all planning to make a beefed up cheese paladin, we have to get the cheese blessing for sure.
I think we should inquire the on the necessary worship rituals for each. We might have to sacrifice a lot of specific corpses if we want to make the most of our blessing and we should have a general idea of what to kill. If we have to give up any treasure for Golddug or drink a whole glass of plump helmet man for Cakewine, we have the right to know.
« Last Edit: May 19, 2014, 10:25:32 pm by Raul351 »
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CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #713 on: May 19, 2014, 10:24:05 pm »

Also, that last panel. 'tis my new computer background. You have been immortalized in the epicosity of being the first thing I see 'pon booting this thing oop. Congrats!

Dwarfy

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #714 on: May 19, 2014, 10:34:42 pm »

Also, that last panel. 'tis my new computer background. You have been immortalized in the epicosity of being the first thing I see 'pon booting this thing oop. Congrats!

Same thing here, replacing the previous background of Misty running out of the doors. I just adore this art.


I mean quite seriously, look at that scenery! So much lovely detail! Delicious, delicious, precious details!

That's just one post too! Truly a sign of glory to come.

I am ready for this art.
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CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #715 on: May 19, 2014, 10:36:25 pm »

Also, that last panel. 'tis my new computer background. You have been immortalized in the epicosity of being the first thing I see 'pon booting this thing oop. Congrats!

Same thing here, replacing the previous background of Misty running out of the doors. I just adore this art.


I mean quite seriously, look at that scenery! So much lovely detail! Delicious, delicious, precious details!

That's just one post too! Truly a sign of glory to come.

I am ready for this art.
I know! I can't wait to see what Shielddawn looks like!

MadMonkey

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #716 on: May 19, 2014, 11:57:40 pm »

Cowsea is obviously the best god but how could you not also worship Urist CCCVI? He is truly the god of change and you can't make milk into cheese without that.
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Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #717 on: May 20, 2014, 12:45:14 am »

Do you think plumpy will stop following us if we give him our puzzlebox?
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Ultimuh

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #718 on: May 20, 2014, 03:14:23 am »

I say focus on Cowsea.
If we want to become the best cheesemaker, like noone ever was. Cowsea is the way to go.

edit: Ask if it's possible to worship more than one god. (to keep Cowsea secondary, if she's not chosen first.)
« Last Edit: May 20, 2014, 04:39:18 am by Ultimuh »
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CaptainMcClellan

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Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker (Illustrated Interactive Story) [POLL ADDED]
« Reply #719 on: May 20, 2014, 04:14:38 am »

Do you think plumpy will stop following us if we give him our puzzlebox?
Why do we want Plumpy to stop following us?

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