Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Poll

Reader count!  Do you read TLCM?  If so, pick your favorite character below!

Misty Kolnazom, the Greatest Cheesemaker Ever!
Reg Pashmad the Recruit
Gruzzlus Holt the Captain
Plumpy the Plump Helmet Man
Kulet Lokunnomel the Nun
Enir Twigappears the Overseer
Darkerdaffodil the Elf
Maynard the Mule
Other
Iron Owl the Iron Knight

Pages: 1 ... 338 339 [340] 341 342

Author Topic: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05  (Read 1048608 times)

Quarque

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 8/26
« Reply #5085 on: January 31, 2020, 06:37:16 am »

Whelp, poor Misty.

Here is hoping that a "cheese" made out of a whole pot of Rennet (pesticide?), mystery vial juice and divine milk is a poison, both irresistable and lethal for the queen.
Logged

Dunamisdeos

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dead Postocalypse lies dreaming.
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 8/26
« Reply #5086 on: January 31, 2020, 01:56:32 pm »

Whelp, poor Misty.

Here is hoping that a "cheese" made out of a whole pot of Rennet (pesticide?), mystery vial juice and divine milk is a poison, both irresistable and lethal for the queen.

Oh! It IS holy, isn't it?

Maybe it's not a bad vampire. Maybe we should like, not kill her immediately.
Logged
FACT I: Post note art is best art.
FACT II: Dunamisdeos is a forum-certified wordsmith.
FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

evictedSaint

  • Bay Watcher
  • if (ANNOYED_W_FANS==true) { KILL_CHAR(rand()); }
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5087 on: February 05, 2020, 09:02:39 pm »

I thought about it a bit and maybe being adversarial isn't the best idea. What ever creature she is, she's a queen so there must be diplomatic options available to us. Greet your queen politely and present your cheese like you came here for.



It's best to be polite.  She's the Queen, after all.  You'll just greet her, present your cheese, and the rest will follow naturally...right?

"H-Hello! I...um.  Hello, my Q-Queen! I'm here...I'm here to give...um.  I have...my cheese.  Hello.  I'd like to...um...I..."

To be fair, the only other noble you've ever really met was your Dad.  He could be scary sometimes, but never...never like this.





The Queen tilts her head for a moment.

"I beg your pardon?  Oh, right.  One moment, please - "





"There we go! Sorry, I forget sometimes others need light.  Now, hello there, little girl.  What's your name?"

"M...Misty, my Queen."

"Misty! What a pretty name!  It's a bit like my name, isn't it?  And please, call me 'Momuz'. 'Queen' is so stuffy, isn't it?"

"I...I guess so."

"Now, Misty, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"


And I, too, propose that whatever you do, keep the cheese in front of you.  Either a defense as recently stated or a proper offering or whatever.  The cheese is the key.  THE CHEESE IS THE KEY.




"Well, I made some...cheese.  My first ever cheese! And I made it with Cowsea's Holy Cow Milk.  So...it's probably really good.  And I thought you might like to try some?"

"Oh my! That's so very special, Misty! I'd love to have some.  This is your very first cheese? So that makes you a novice cheesemaker, then?  I'm impressed!"

"Thank you, Quee...Momuz.  I worked reallyreallyreally hard on it, and it took a reallyreallyreally long time..."

"Oh, I'm sure you did! It's not easy making cheese."

"I know!  It's really tough!"

"That's right, and you did a very good job, Misty."




"Let me go light some more candles and fetch another chair, then we can sit down and try some of your special cheese.  You said you made it with Cowsea's milk?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"Then I'm sure it's a Masterpiece!"


You...aren't sure what you were afraid of.  The Queen - Momuz - is really, really nice! She's kind of like...a sweet grandmother. 

You feel a little silly for being so nervous.  This is going to turn out great.








Thanks to the herculean efforts of MadMonkey, The Littlest Cheesemaker now has an external mirror!  The site makes it much easier to read the story without combing through the forum thread, and I'm quite pleased with how it looks.  If you want to re-read the story (or just see what the fuss is about!) you can visit the site here at http://thelittlestcheesemaker.com/!
« Last Edit: February 05, 2020, 09:07:57 pm by evictedSaint »
Logged

Egan_BW

  • Bay Watcher
  • Invisible monsters from the synthwave dimension
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5088 on: February 05, 2020, 09:27:10 pm »

Guess we're just primed to find royalty terrifying in illustrated adventures.
Logged
Why would I ever allow a phantom to hurt me?

Superdorf

  • Bay Watcher
  • "Sanity impaired"
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5089 on: February 05, 2020, 09:39:28 pm »

Nope, I don't buy it. This Momuz lady forgets light is a thing? Very dwarfy and all, but y'all saw those fangs...

Be friendly. Be respectful. Be wary.
Also, ask queen Momuz about her crown. It's got a most interesting shape.


(also, update! happy!)

Egan_BW

  • Bay Watcher
  • Invisible monsters from the synthwave dimension
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5090 on: February 05, 2020, 09:44:51 pm »

Well, in our current version DF light sources don't exist and aren't needed. That apparently isn't the world that Misty lives in, because she couldn't see.
Also the queen said "I forget sometimes that others need light", which is a statement that she doesn't. I think if we ask about it, she'll just tell us.

And it will be because she's a vampire. She's a vampire.
Still, a friendly one. Vamps are people too, just people who enjoy drinking others' blood.
Logged
Why would I ever allow a phantom to hurt me?

Dunamisdeos

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dead Postocalypse lies dreaming.
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5091 on: February 05, 2020, 09:53:50 pm »

THE LITTLEST CHEESEMAKER UPDATED!!!!



Anyway though, vampires in DF are not inherently evil. Some of them rule pleasantly for centuries.

Let's trust, but verify.

Quote from: The Dracula Before Us
"Then I'm sure it's a Masterpiece!"

Did... we create an artifact cheese? Is this how that works? Make sure we keep the cheese with us, regardless. Slice off some cheese, eat some cheese with Queen, and tell her all about how we came here to raise cheesemaking to his finest heights!

Keep the remaining cheese between us and Queen Chompers at all times, though.
Logged
FACT I: Post note art is best art.
FACT II: Dunamisdeos is a forum-certified wordsmith.
FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

mightymushroom

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5092 on: February 05, 2020, 10:28:55 pm »

Also, ask queen Momuz about her crown. It's got a most interesting shape.
+1 Very much so, it's probably the most interesting thing about her, other than that odd grin she has when the lights aren't on.

Gotta say, when I saw "Updated 2/05" it was one of the happiest moments of my day.
Logged

Sir Knight

  • Bay Watcher
  • E Platypus Unum
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5093 on: February 05, 2020, 10:39:19 pm »

[Yaaaaay sound effects]!

(Those are the sounds of many "yay"s.  I seem to recall a sound file like that on mid-classic Mac computers.)

Too tired to say much more right now, but I'm delighted to see an update.  Also, yeah, cheese.  And vampires.  And plot.
Logged

Ultimuh

  • Bay Watcher
  • One two three, DEATH!
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5094 on: February 06, 2020, 12:24:12 am »

Guess we're just primed to find royalty terrifying in illustrated adventures.
And very susceptible to alcoholic beverages.
Logged
Steam: Ultimuh
Kongregate: Ultimuh
Guns Of Icarus: Uriel Ultim
World Of Tanks (eu): Ultimuh
War Thunder: Ultimuh
FFXIV A REALM REBORN: Uriel Ultim (Cereberus) Kurinrin Krillinlin (Leviathan)

Superdorf

  • Bay Watcher
  • "Sanity impaired"
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5095 on: February 06, 2020, 12:51:49 am »

Guess we're just primed to find royalty terrifying in illustrated adventures.
And very susceptible to alcoholic beverages.

...Only now do I understand what you people are referencing.

Haspen

  • Bay Watcher
  • Mr.Peasley where's my stuffed mouse?
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5096 on: February 06, 2020, 01:02:03 am »

Be friendly. Be respectful. Be wary.
Also, ask queen Momuz about her crown. It's got a most interesting shape.


"It is a crown. It is made of gold. On it there's image of three circles made of gold."

:P
Logged
SigFlags!
SPAMhub!&Fire Emblem on Forums: 8! and 6re!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

evictedSaint

  • Bay Watcher
  • if (ANNOYED_W_FANS==true) { KILL_CHAR(rand()); }
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5097 on: February 06, 2020, 02:59:58 am »

Guess we're just primed to find royalty terrifying in illustrated adventures.
And very susceptible to alcoholic beverages.

...Only now do I understand what you people are referencing.

Name one - ONE - similar MSPA-inspired webcomic which features terrifying royalty.  TLCM is a totally unique webcomic that bears no similarities to any other.

Dermonster

  • Bay Watcher
  • Break the world, see what falls out.
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5098 on: February 06, 2020, 03:02:08 am »

Guess we're just primed to find royalty terrifying in illustrated adventures.
And very susceptible to alcoholic beverages.

...Only now do I understand what you people are referencing.

Name one - ONE - similar MSPA-inspired webcomic which features terrifying royalty.  TLCM is a totally unique webcomic that bears no similarities to any other.

MSPA, as a sort of inspirational ouroboros, has at least four cases of terrifying royalty itself.
Logged
I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

Silverybearded

  • Bay Watcher
  • Midor Belnekol!
    • View Profile
Re: The Littlest Cheesemaker - Updated 02/05
« Reply #5099 on: February 06, 2020, 05:36:27 am »

Her name literally translates as "crypt".
Might as well be wearing a "I'm a vampire" sign.
Logged
Engraved is a superior rendition of an image of Arkoth, the local deity of balance and speech, and two elves. Arkoth is burning the two elves. Arkoth is laughing. The two elves are suffering. The image was commissioned by the Round Guild, a local dwarven government.
Pages: 1 ... 338 339 [340] 341 342