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[shadowform]

Self-explanatory. My first artifact on my new fort since picking the game back up recently was Greenbeans, a cedar splint.  I suppose I shouldn't complain too much since it has a picture of a bronze colossus killing an elf on it, but...  Greenbeans? Really?

What are some of the worst (and best) artifact names (or just plain artifacts) you've gotten lately?

[Iamblichos]

[MDFification]

A piece of dyed underwear named that Tatooed Imprisonment is actually quite fitting.

[shadowform]

Oh god
I am now imagining a fat, hairy dwarf wearing bright-red antique boxers that say 'THE TATTOOED IMPRISONMENT' on the waistband and sixteen cloaks, wearing sunglasses, carrying a barrel of booze under one arm, with a tattoo on his gut saying [DUNGEON MASTER], saying 'Deal with it'.

[brokegamer]

Recently I got a rock salt door made from a single chunk of rock salt. 

I never consider artefact clothing to be useless though, since it's basically indestructible. Add it to a militia uniform for extra coverage.

[doublestrafe]

Recently I got a rock salt door made from a single chunk of rock salt. 

I never consider artefact clothing to be useless though, since it's basically indestructible. Add it to a militia uniform for extra coverage.

Hey, any furniture, especially a door, is a useful artifact. Indestructible building destroyer bait that you can lock and unlock without relying on dwarfpower? Yes please!

You want useless, have a candy hammer with a picture of what it would look like in gold on it.

[Nyxalinth]

I once had a dog leather backpack called The National Fragrances.

[Stalker]

This looks usefull...