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Author Topic: Things that made you laugh today: some people notice when 1 change the title  (Read 1530753 times)

hops

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Things that made you laugh today: 10847 horse snorts and urinating
« Reply #9060 on: August 10, 2018, 09:57:36 pm »

Is that the future tagline for the laugh thread?
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

One True Polycule with flame99 <3

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hector13

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9061 on: August 10, 2018, 10:22:16 pm »

It should be.

It was a movie dialogue subtitle, to be more specific.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

Rose

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9062 on: August 11, 2018, 12:43:23 am »

It's like in DF. Some people kill everything in sight for fun, some like roleplaying, some like questing, and some are a combination of the three.

I generally play just enough to get whatever feature I'm working on in Armok Vision to show up.
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KittyTac

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9063 on: August 11, 2018, 03:21:18 am »

Short Story Generator produces So Bad, It's Good stories. Example:

Spiteful Beth DeVito
A Short Story
by KittyTac
Beth DeVito had always loved picturesque Oxford with its unnatural, uneven umbrellas. It was a place where she felt afraid.

She was a spiteful, splendid, wine drinker with wide eyes and ginger fingers. Her friends saw her as a grubby, gigantic gamer. Once, she had even made a cup of tea for a damaged owl. That's the sort of woman he was.

Beth walked over to the window and reflected on her wild surroundings. The sun shone like boating owls.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Sophia Blackman. Sophia was a stupid bear with brunette eyes and sticky fingers.

Beth gulped. She was not prepared for Sophia.

As Beth stepped outside and Sophia came closer, she could see the worried glint in her eye.

"Look Beth," growled Sophia, with a delightful glare that reminded Beth of stupid blue bottles. "It's not that I don't love you, but I want a phone number. You owe me 965 euros."

Beth looked back, even more barmy and still fingering the ribbed banana. "Sophia, I don't have the money," she replied.

They looked at each other with relaxed feelings, like two testy, tense toads laughing at a very wild snow storm, which had flute music playing in the background and two stupid uncles loving to the beat.

Beth studied Sophia's brunette eyes and sticky fingers. Eventually, she took a deep breath. "I'm afraid I declared myself bankrupt," explained Beth. "You will never get your money."

"No!" objected Sophia. "You lie!"

"I do not!" retorted Beth. "Now get your brunette eyes out of here before I hit you with this ribbed banana."

Sophia looked sad, her wallet raw like a tight, tame torch.

Beth could actually hear Sophia's wallet shatter into 965 pieces. Then the stupid bear hurried away into the distance.

Not even a glass of wine would calm Beth's nerves tonight.

THE END

My favorites:
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That's the sort of woman he was.
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The sun shone like boating owls.
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Her friends saw her like a grubby, gigantic gamer.
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with a delightful glare that reminded Beth of stupid blue bottles.
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Beth looked back, even more barmy and still fingering the ribbed banana.
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Once, she had even made a cup of tea for a damaged owl.
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They looked at each other with relaxed feelings, like two testy, tense toads laughing at a very wild snow storm, which had flute music playing in the background and two stupid uncles loving to the beat.
Quote
Now get your brunette eyes out of here before I hit you with this ribbed banana."
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Don't trust this toaster that much, it could be a villain in disguise.
Mostly phone-posting, sorry for any typos or autocorrect hijinks.

Kagus

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9064 on: August 11, 2018, 04:10:02 am »

The weather app on a friend's phone had a forecast for Sunday the 19th showing partial clouds, a high of 20 degrees Celsius, and a low of 0 Kelvin.

hector13

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9065 on: August 11, 2018, 06:35:52 am »

The weather app on a friend's phone had a forecast for Sunday the 19th showing partial clouds, a high of 20 degrees Celsius, and a low of 0 Kelvin.

Well, technically it isn’t wrong.

Perhaps something terribly unpleasant will happen that day.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

Kagus

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9066 on: August 11, 2018, 07:03:07 am »

The weather app on a friend's phone had a forecast for Sunday the 19th showing partial clouds, a high of 20 degrees Celsius, and a low of 0 Kelvin.

Well, technically it isn’t wrong.

Perhaps something terribly unpleasant will happen that day.
It just means that summer is finally coming to an end.

Yoink

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9067 on: August 11, 2018, 07:08:07 am »

fingering the ribbed banana
Wow, awkward...
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

Bumber

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9068 on: August 11, 2018, 09:56:55 pm »

The Snow that Flurried like Talking Guppies
A Short Story
by Anonymous

Shane Smart looked at the giant map in his hands and felt stable.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his idyllic surroundings. He had always loved sleepy Truro with its talented, testy trees. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel stable.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Lauren Blunder. Lauren was a creepy volcano with vast toenails and wide feet.

Shane gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a popular, admirable, whiskey drinker with fluffy toenails and pretty feet. His friends saw him as a manky, mutated monster. Once, he had even brought a prickly old man back from the brink of death.

But not even a popular person who had once brought a prickly old man back from the brink of death, was prepared for what Lauren had in store today.

The snow flurried like talking guppies, making Shane worried.

As Shane stepped outside and Lauren came closer, he could see the scrawny glint in her eye.

"Look Shane," growled Lauren, with a spiteful glare that reminded Shane of creepy goldfish. "It's not that I don't love you, but I want justice. You owe me 2650 euros."

Shane looked back, even more worried and still fingering the giant map. "Lauren, yabba Dabba Doo," he replied.

They looked at each other with fuzzy feelings, like two anxious, attractive aardvarks laughing at a very intelligent Christening, which had trance music playing in the background and two ruthless uncles smiling to the beat.

Suddenly, Lauren lunged forward and tried to punch Shane in the face. Quickly, Shane grabbed the giant map and brought it down on Lauren's skull.

Lauren's vast toenails trembled and her wide feet wobbled. She looked relaxed, her wallet raw like a breezy, beautiful blade.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Lauren Blunder was dead.

Shane Smart went back inside and made himself a nice glass of whiskey.

THE END


Sooooo stable! He bludgeoned a volcano to death with a map, putting Urist McMiscObjectUser to shame.
« Last Edit: August 11, 2018, 10:02:28 pm by Bumber »
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

hector13

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9070 on: August 12, 2018, 12:28:10 am »

Someone mentioned an ai which could create short stories, I imagine it’s that.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

KittyTac

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9071 on: August 12, 2018, 12:33:02 am »

Someone mentioned an ai which could create short stories, I imagine it’s that.
No, it just inserts words in a template. Give me a link to the AI.
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Don't trust this toaster that much, it could be a villain in disguise.
Mostly phone-posting, sorry for any typos or autocorrect hijinks.

KittyTac

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 9244 snickers and counting
« Reply #9072 on: August 12, 2018, 10:35:14 am »

Russian black comedy anti-war song. The lyrics are in Russian, but the imagery sums up the song.
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Don't trust this toaster that much, it could be a villain in disguise.
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bloop_bleep

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The closest thing Bay12 has to a flamewar is an argument over philosophy that slowly transitioned to an argument about quantum mechanics.
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