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[crapabear]

This release is completely mindblowing. Let me tell you how my first adventurer of 40.04 is faring (spoilers follow).

Actually, I'll have to tell you about the world first. I decided to play around with the custom world gen parameters for the first time in a long while, and I didn't really know what I was doing. Here's what I ended up with:

Nitharaecamo, The Future Universes. Note that this map is AFTER the 500 year history I let it run through. One notes a distinct lack of civilization. In fact, the numbers starting in the year 501 were as follows: 506 humans, 741 elves, 53,749 goblins, and 423 kobolds. The last of the dwarven civilizations, The Greatest Gate, lost its last fortress (Granitedanced) to the goblins way back in 143.

Despite there being zero living dwarves in the world, it still let me embark in fortress mode. You see, my goal for my future adventurer was to make it inside one of these vaults I keep hearing about. I knew I probably wouldn't be able to make it all the way to the fabled slab inside, but I at least wanted to try and snatch some of that sweet procedurally generated equipment worn by the forces guarding it. So the first step on this journey was to make a fortress that would basically just serve as an armory for my hero.

My seven, for whatever reason, considered themselves to be the descendants of one of the original dwarven civs, The Whiskered Knife, who only ever had one site, which was destroyed in the year 1 by a roc. We founded Problembell on a flat volcano in the southeastern corner of the world and quickly got to work. Magma forges were set up right near the surface, and after the bare essentials of industry were set up, the hunt for adamantine began. A wealth of native gold and an early metalcrafter migrant took care of all of the fort's needs, pretty much. I would just buy up all the food, alcohol and clothing from every caravan in exchange for a handful of gold trinkets. Our defenses consisted of a rectangular wall surrounding the downward staircases on the surface, with a drawbridge. Luckily, we never experienced a serious siege.

Funnily enough, as soon as the settlement upgraded into a hamlet, one of my original 7 immediately rose to be the queen of The Whiskered Knife. She didn't seem to care too much when I ignored all of her requirements and mandates. As I said, the entire purpose of this fort was to serve as a glorified armory. In an incredible stroke of luck, within one season of producing my first batch of adamantine wafers, my only armorsmith got struck with a fey mood. The result was an artifact adamantine helm -- but then I savescummed (or as I call it for the sake of immersion, "created an alternate timeline") -- and the result was actually Shilràrvesh, an adamantine breastplate encircled with bands of emerald cut brown zircon. With his newfound legendary armorsmithing skill, I set about getting this guy to craft the rest of a full set, including an adamantine cloth hood and cloak.

The weapon took a bit more time. Instead of waiting around for an artifact weapon, I just had a dwarf pump out silver and copper short swords on repeat for a few seasons straight until his skill reached excellent, then had him forge a few adamantine battle axes until I got one that was masterful quality. After that, it was time to retire the fort and roll up an adventurer.

I don't usually name my adventurers after myself, but I guess I wasn't feeling super creative at the time, so Jacob Netreleases was his name. I started out, unsurprisingly, as a guard in Problembell. After donning the full set of adamantine equipment set aside for me, I scaled over the fortress wall and headed out. To my surprise, there was a group of elven merchants waiting just outside the gates. They had their loaded up yak bulls with them, but for some reason they had several wagons with them as well. Checking the contents of their bins, they had brought along some metal weapons, along with other things that normal elven merchants never bring. Strange. Also, has anyone noticed that you can attack wagons in adventure mode, as well as talk to them? Like deities, they don't answer back.

Using Legends Viewer I was able to determine the existence of four vaults, as well as their approximate locations: Whipfortress and Bulwarkquest just to the east, Coverphlegms a day-or-so's trek to the west, and Shellsieged to the far north.

Whipfortress being the closest, I decided to head there. In a time before time, Edir Boltviolence the Contest of Tusks created the place and stored his tablet there. He still rules today from his seat of power half a continent away. I didn't have much trouble finding the place. After resting a bit and saving just outside the entrance, I headed inside. The first of my foes awaited me in the second room. This place was protected by Beru's Warriors, a race of two-tailed humanoids composed of steam who fought with twisting metal weaponry and wore wispy cloth garments. The other race living there were called Protected Puppets, who were larger, equipment-less humanoids also composed of steam.

It took me a while to get the hang of fighting these guys (yes, I was savescumming). The Beru swordmaster in the first room always went down, but the trick was to not get ganged up on, and stay away from stairs. Almost every incoming attack was completely deflected by my adamantine gear, with the occasional exception of a bash in the head from a macelord. As for my own attacks, most of them were deftly parried or dodged by the warriors, and any hit I did get in resulted in me being caught in a burst of steam. The creatures didn't have blood and didn't appear to feel pain, so fights would pretty much only end with a severing strike to the head or upper body. Again, the only real danger was getting simultaneously beat up on by three or four dudes, getting over exerted and passing out, and getting rocked in the head by a twisting metal mace while unconscious.

I picked up a few pieces of wispy cloth outerwear and layered them over my armor, just for fun. A few face veils, some gloves, and a toga. I was on the hunt for a twisting metal axe, but interestingly every Beru's Warrior axelord that I encountered fought me without a weapon. And left behind a pile of four or five twisting metal shields wherever they had been standing. Don't ask me what that's about. So, to my surprise, I actually did make it all the way to the slab chamber. And cleared out all the enemies in the vault along the way. I have to compliment Toady here on the design and procedural layout of these sites. The massive curving quarter-turn spiral staircase rooms are beautiful. At one point I got stuck and realized that the path I had to take was a set of vertical bars set into the wall two or three z-levels up and could only be accessed by climbing up from the floor or shimmying over from the ledge I came in from. I swear I got the same feeling exploring this place that I got while exploring Anor Londo for the first time in Dark Souls.

So anyway I read the slab and hauled it outside with me, leaving the vault as a legendary axedwarf. But I was far from done.

This post is getting a bit long, so I think I'll cut it off here and write the rest in another post. I might have to leave in a few minutes though, so forgive me if it takes a few hours.

[crapabear]

Okay, so part two. (Is this the right subforum for this, by the way?)

So the next closest vault to Whipfortress was Bulwarkquest, just a few world map tiles to the northwest.

So I make my way to the vault, rest outside for a bit, and bust in. I was surprised to be attacked by even more Beru's Warriors and Protected Puppets. Referring back to the legends, it looks like three out of the four demons in this world collaborated with the same deity, and thus three of the four vaults all had the same creatures guarding them. Well, I was more interested in seeing new things than in conquering the same forces again just for the hell of it, so I made my way back to Problembell. The final unique vault in the world was about a day west of there. I hopped over the gate, grabbed some provisions, and spent the night in the communal dormitory. I also snatched an artifact golden flask that I forgot existed, because why not. I departed just as the morning snow began falling.

So I trekked out west, stopping along the way at any hamlets I could see along the way. Each one I stopped at was completely abandoned, with one completely overrun by wild boars. At one point I passed through a complex of tombs and had a fun meeting with the mummies inside. Eventually I made it to Coverphlegms, the ancient creation of Bugsud Snotsvomit the Filth of Skulls, a demon associated with blight, death, deformity and disease.

Appropriately, his guardians, known as Kozi's Soldiers, were small humanoids composed of vomit. Alongside them were the Attendants of Kozi, a race of large squirrels twisted into human form and composed of grime and filth. Anthropomorphic shit-squirrels. Both of these guys went down a lot quicker than the folks at the last vault, and I don't think it was just because I went in with legendary axedwarf and fighting skill. Most of them were struck down in a single well-placed hit. An interesting thing is that unlike the Beru's Warriors, the Kozi's Soldiers actually spoke. Mostly "Fighting? What is it this time...". At one point after clearing a room, I heard a conversation between two Kozi's Soldiers from a neighboring room. "At least it doesn't rain down here," one said to the other. There was one lone axelord who even let me have a full conversation with it before attacking me. Apparently they had been having trouble with beasts.

So relatively quickly I made it to the hematite slab at the top of the structure and read its contents, and dragged it outside with me. Bugsud's seat of power was in the dark fortress Oarhell, four world map tiles over to the east, and seeing that I was now legendary skill level in axedwarf, shield user, and fighter, I decided it would be interesting to pay him a visit. I headed out east. By this time I had earned the full name Jacob Netreleases the Earthen Bust-Crusher of Hawks.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Bonus ultra-comfy screenshot

A short distance out from the outer edges of the goblin pits, I had to stop and cross a river (the method I've been using is to climb up into overhanging tree canopies and into a tree on the other bank. Much safer than swimming). Immediately on the other side of the river there happened to be a small human army camping out. They scattered in all directions as soon as they saw me, with a few of the marksmen firing bolts my way. My movement was quite slow, and at that point I realized it probably had something to do with the two enormous slabs I had stuffed in my backpack. I don't know for sure whether or not you need the slab physically with you in order to banish/recruit the demon bound by it, but either way I decided to abandon my slabs there on the river bank and enjoy a quick tussle with this army squad.

In all the chaos I couldn't get my hands on many, but I did manage to slay eight of the soldiers before I gave up on trying to convince them to stop the violence. I would have liked to have asked them why the were travelling, but alas, all they wanted to do was run around in circles and occasionally attack me. I made my way up the hill and soon I was into goblin territory.

Oarhell is a massive sprawling network of towers and trenches where no less than 10,125 goblins live. As soon as I made it inside the territory, I could tell something was going on. Panicked and injured goblins ran around in all directions, declaring "There's fighting!". Most ran right past me without giving me a second look. I darted from tower to tower, seeing dead and half-dead goblins all around, hitting Enter through pages and pages of dialogue on each step. Despite all the chaos, I couldn't make out any clear attackers. It wasn't until I saw combat messages about goblins fighting with other goblins that I realized that I must have stepped right in the middle of some kind of violent civil uprising. All around me, ten thousand goblins at war with each other as I made my way deeper and deeper into the heart of their territory. Honestly, what other game in the world can deliver this kind of experience?

Eventually my radar told me that I was right above the slade spire, so I hunted around until I found a tower that had a downward staircase into the tunnels. This was my first time exploring the new goblin sites, so I didn't quite know where I was going. I poked around in some pretty claustrophobic sandstone tunnels until I found a door that opened up into the side of a massive pit. Scaling down to the bottom, I found an arrangement of slabs, coffins and goblin skeletons, right next to several deep-looking shafts. A human child stood nearby, presumably a prisoner. Asking him about armies, he just happened to mention to me that an army from Oarhell was getting ready to march on Problembell. Huh. I wonder how much of a fight they'll put up.

I picked a shaft and shimmied down, eventually making it down to the first cavern layer. No signs of a spire that I could see. Just more goblin skeletons. I poked around until I found another downward shaft, this one with some water trickling down it. I wasn't sure if falling water increased the risk of slipping, but I climbed down anyway. The second cavern layer was far more inhospitable than the first. As far as I could tell, all of it was water. All the water was flowing, too, presumably in the direction of more downward shafts that lead to the third layer. I climbed around for a while, trying to see if I could find some dry land, but eventually gave up and just found a shallow spot around one of the downward shafts, and climbed down for the third time.

The third cavern layer, where my adventurer now sits, is quite tall and has a lot of water, but plenty of dry land, too. Climbing along the ceiling, I rounded a corner and the slade block wall of the spire came into my view.

Now here's my dilemma, and the reason I made this thread. I've explored every exposed side of this spire from top to bottom (what I can access from this cavern layer, at least). I have yet to find any kind of entrance. What I'm afraid of is that perhaps you're supposed to enter it from the top, and that it's somehow connected to the goblin pits via a convenient hallways or something which I just missed. Does anyone know? Until then, here's my adventurer frustratedly laying down on top of a nethercap.

[Alev]

Nice story, and right forum.

Anthromorphic shit-squirrels.

Glorious.

And I've yet to explore spires, though I thought they would be like the old demon sites.

[Duuvian]

I've read that in dwarf sites you can fast travel up and down z levels. I don't know if it works in goblin sites though.

[simonthedwarf]

Awesome read.

[crapabear]

Update: I feel like an idiot.

After poking around on the bottom cavern layer a bit more, I decided it was hopeless and that I should try and find a way back up. I climbed around until I saw some mist and falling water, and indeed there was a shaft in the ceiling above. I ascended back up to the second cavern layer. I found the spire again, at least the part of it that jutted through this layer. Again, after searching its perimeter, no entrance.

Repeat that whole series of events but with the first cavern layer. Finding a huge pile of goblin skeletons, I eventually located a shaft all the way back up to the goblin pits. And boom, just to my right upon coming back up, the door to the spire. Ugh. I really plan on giving this guy hell for making me go through that.

Spoiler: Screenshot (click to show/hide)

[crapabear]

My God.

So I explored the slade spire for a bit. The goblin infighting was going on in here, too. It must be night time, because most of the goblins I saw were sleeping in the middle of their weapons stockpiles or in the hallways. A good number of them were already dead. A few were actually awake to fight me.

I just made it up into the throne room. Here's what I just walked into.

Spoiler: Screenshot (click to show/hide)

Bugsud is laying in the corner, already dead. A goblin clothier sleeps next to him. A goblin corpse is resting against the opposite wall. The Lady, a human apparently named Osta Guslourar is sleeping on the ground to my left. Her left hip and right wrist are injured, and her eyes are coated in her own tears. The sleeping goblin is also injured, though much more seriously, and has also been crying.

What. On. Earth. Just. Happened. Here.

[RealFear]

Asking him about armies, he just happened to mention to me that an army from Oarhell was getting ready to march on Problembell. Huh. I wonder how much of a fight they'll put up.

Giggled when I read this, in-case you didn't know already, invasions currently have a 100% success rate, so much so that small squads can conquer massive, historic fortresses.
Though you could probably save it by un-retiring it, and playing until you reach the siege after your adventurer is done with his journey. (you could even retire your adventurer there, and he might be able to single-handedly fight off a siege)

[Absentia]

A great read with a twist ending. Four stars!

My assumption would be that the human Lady was the leader of the insurrection, and while you were screwing around in the caverns she was dueling with Bugsud. Either she got a lucky hit or Bugsud was a particularly wussy species of demon, and she won and claimed ownership of the site. The tears are probably from the pain of her injuries.

[crapabear]

Could be. I got frustrated with her running around in circles and not telling me what was going on so i broke her knee caps and wrists. After she passed out due to pain I realized I wasn't going to get any more information out of her, so I proclaimed ownership of the site a couple times and decapitated her.

After I leave the site I think I'll retire and check legends to see exactly what went on.

[Alluvian_Est-Endrati]

Very interesting. I too am quite curious what legends mode might say about the demon and what occurred at the spire. Thanks for sharing all of this, quite a good read to stumble across!

[Repseki]

Asking him about armies, he just happened to mention to me that an army from Oarhell was getting ready to march on Problembell. Huh. I wonder how much of a fight they'll put up.

Giggled when I read this, in-case you didn't know already, invasions currently have a 100% success rate, so much so that small squads can conquer massive, historic fortresses.
Though you could probably save it by un-retiring it, and playing until you reach the siege after your adventurer is done with his journey. (you could even retire your adventurer there, and he might be able to single-handedly fight off a siege)

Just remember the two week calender jump before you will be able to un-retire the fort. I don't know how fast armies move about, but there is probably a good chance they will make it to the fort and take control before you can load back into Dwarf Mode, which could cause some wacky loyalty stuff.

[crapabear]

Just remember the two week calender jump before you will be able to un-retire the fort. I don't know how fast armies move about, but there is probably a good chance they will make it to the fort and take control before you can load back into Dwarf Mode, which could cause some wacky loyalty stuff.

Oh no, I never had any intention of defending the fort. They've already served their purpose. Maybe that's a bit callous.

In any case, my save bugged out before I could make it back out of goblin territory. As soon as I take three or so steps in any direction, DF crashes to desktop.

According to legends, the Lady Osta was indeed the one who slew Bugsud. He died by colliding with an obstacle. I couldn't quite figure out the motive. She lived her whole life as a member of the Lie of Wards, the same entity which founded Oarhell and ruled it continuously since then. Shouldn't parties carrying out an insurrection get their own named entity?

Anyway, some interesting facts about Osta Mistmalign. She was born in Oarhell in 445 and spent her whole life there. Her first and only kill (aside from Bugsud) was when she was 14. Coincidentally, her victim was a human male named Osta Puppetghouls. Even more coincidentally, the next event in her life was her marriage six years later to the human Osta Demonsqueeze.

So, who knows. According to legends, her dream was to Rule the World.

[Absentia]

Analysis:

• Obstacle collision explains a lot. Impact damage is calculated based on the density of the thing you're slamming into, and this fight took place in a room made of slade, the densest material in the game by a wide margin. All it would take is for her to land one grapple and throw to give Bugsud a bad case of pulped head.
• Osta was 56 years old. That's older than my mother, and she just killed a demon with her bare hands.
• Presumably the insurrection was the first phase of her plan to realize her dream of ruling the world, which you foiled by wandering in and decapitating her.
• "Osta" is the goblin word for "witch". Seems fitting for her, but not a great thing to name your son.

[smjjames]

I don't know for sure whether or not you need the slab physically with you in order to banish/recruit the demon bound by it,

I tried reading the slab and there was no effect at all, no idea how to activate the secret within it.