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Author Topic: ROLL TO COW CHAPTER III: MONSTER COWS ON THE MOON  (Read 15230 times)

Elephant Parade

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ROLL TO COW CHAPTER III: MONSTER COWS ON THE MOON
« on: August 16, 2014, 08:44:14 pm »
YOU ARE A COW ON A SMALL FARM

YOU ARE ABOUT TO BE BUTCHERED

WHAT DO YOU DO?
« Last Edit: August 29, 2014, 08:49:27 pm by Elephant Parade »
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Yoink

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2014, 08:52:18 pm »
Creepily approach a nearby human and persuade them to milk me.
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Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on February 17, 2019, 05:32:37 pm
Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
Quote from: grisha5 on August 07, 2014, 02:08:36 am
you need to reconsider your life
Quote from: JoshuaFH on March 29, 2018, 07:54:09 am
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

SaberToothTiger

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2014, 08:57:05 pm »
Use my charm to seduce the butcher into an affair with me.
« Last Edit: August 16, 2014, 09:34:17 pm by SaberToothTiger »
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Quote from: MaximumZero on June 14, 2014, 11:01:53 pm
Quote from: Yoink on June 14, 2014, 10:54:23 pm
I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

wer6

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2014, 09:16:28 pm »
GORE HIM WITH HORNY HORN.
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Quote from: shadenight123 on August 25, 2013, 05:01:40 pm
Just before leaving, Psysquid quickly summons a Burrito in his mouth.

Nidilap

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #4 on: August 16, 2014, 09:25:54 pm »
Spread rumor that one of the cows, if right clicked enough times, will teleport clicker to secret cow level. But it'll only work if cows live.
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Nidilap likes Adamantine, Bituminous Coal, Garnets, Cats for their aloofness, Dwarves for their stupidity, and Swords for their Spikes and edges. When possible, he prefers to eat pizza, ramen noodles, and sushi. He absolutely detests elves and spiders. He needs MTN DEW to get through the working day.

A medium- sized creature prone to great ambition, but only when he feels like it.

Lyeos

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #5 on: August 16, 2014, 09:27:06 pm »
Knock farmer over.
Crush cranium with hoof.
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Take a closer look at this text!

Coolrune206

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #6 on: August 16, 2014, 09:38:41 pm »
Sit peacefully while my cow bretheren go on a murdering spree.
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Quote from: IronyOwl on September 27, 2017, 02:20:54 pm
"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

Elephant Parade

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #7 on: August 16, 2014, 09:40:30 pm »
Quote from: Yoink on August 16, 2014, 08:52:18 pm
Creepily approach a nearby human and persuade them to milk me.
(6)THE HUMAN IS CREEPED OUT

HE RUNS AWAY, BUT HE TRIPS ON A ROCK AND FALLS ONTO THE ELECTRIC FENCE

THE HUMAN DIES OF ELECTROCUTION

Quote from: SaberToothTiger on August 16, 2014, 08:57:05 pm
Use my charm to seduce the butcher into an affair with me.
(3)THE BUTCHER IS MARRIED

Quote from: wer6 on August 16, 2014, 09:16:28 pm
GORE HIM WITH HORNY HORN.
(5)YOU GORE THE FARMER IN THE SKULL, PIERCING THE BRAIN

(HE DIES)

Quote from: Nidilap on August 16, 2014, 09:25:54 pm
Spread rumor that one of the cows, if right clicked enough times, will teleport clicker to secret cow level. But it'll only work if cows live.
(6)YOUR RUMOUR SPREADS THROUGHOUT THE WORLD

UNFORTUNATELY, IT GETS TWISTED SLIGHTLY

SPECIFICALLY, "LIVE" BECOMES "DIE"

COWS ARE BEING SLAUGHTERED ALL OVER THE PLANET

Quote from: Lyeos on August 16, 2014, 09:27:06 pm
Knock farmer over.
Crush cranium with hoof.
(4)THE FARMER'S CORPSE IS LYING ON THE GROUND. YOU STOMP ON IT A FEW TIMES.

Quote from: Coolrune206 on August 16, 2014, 09:38:41 pm
Sit peacefully while my cow bretheren go on a murdering spree.
(3)A POLICE PATROL HEARS THE FARMER'S SCREAM AND RUSH TO THE FARM

THEY PARK THEIR CAR RIGHT NEXT TO YOU

UNFORTUNATELY, THEY LEAVE THE SIREN ON

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SaberToothTiger

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #8 on: August 16, 2014, 09:40:43 pm »
Quote from: Coolrune206 on August 16, 2014, 09:38:41 pm
Sit peacefully while my cow bretheren go on a murdering spree.
((And a inter-species sexual spree, I have ambitions too, you know.))
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Quote from: MaximumZero on June 14, 2014, 11:01:53 pm
Quote from: Yoink on June 14, 2014, 10:54:23 pm
I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

SaberToothTiger

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #9 on: August 16, 2014, 09:41:24 pm »
Seduce the butcher, his wife and the cops!
« Last Edit: August 16, 2014, 09:48:12 pm by SaberToothTiger »
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Quote from: MaximumZero on June 14, 2014, 11:01:53 pm
Quote from: Yoink on June 14, 2014, 10:54:23 pm
I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Nidilap

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #10 on: August 16, 2014, 09:43:02 pm »
Well, looks like its time for this cow to go human tipping. The physical kind, not money.
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Nidilap likes Adamantine, Bituminous Coal, Garnets, Cats for their aloofness, Dwarves for their stupidity, and Swords for their Spikes and edges. When possible, he prefers to eat pizza, ramen noodles, and sushi. He absolutely detests elves and spiders. He needs MTN DEW to get through the working day.

A medium- sized creature prone to great ambition, but only when he feels like it.

Lightningfalcon

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #11 on: August 16, 2014, 09:43:11 pm »
Jack the patrol car in case of Grand Theft Cow
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Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum circo vincendarum
Quote from: IronyOwl on January 03, 2014, 08:22:41 pm
W-we just... wanted our...
Actually most of the people here explicitly wanted chaos and tragedy. So. Uh.

Coolrune206

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #12 on: August 16, 2014, 09:47:28 pm »
Moo mournfully about this noise. Lie down. If a cow steals the car, look on disinterestedly.
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Quote from: IronyOwl on September 27, 2017, 02:20:54 pm
"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

Paphi

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #13 on: August 16, 2014, 09:49:39 pm »
Wake up under tree. Observe fellow cows and happenings.
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Furtuka

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Re: ROLL TO COW
« Reply #14 on: August 16, 2014, 09:51:17 pm »
MOO INDIGNANTLY
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It's FEF, not FEOF
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