Fire a Hydrogen bomb that magically appeared at the dyson cow. Turn my plane away, and look boss while flying away from a supernuclear explosion.
(6)THE DYSON COW SUFFERS MASSIVE DAMAGE
UNFORTUNATELY, THE RADIATION PRESENT INCREASES FURTHER
IF THE RADIATION HITS EARTH, SURFACE LIFE WILL CEASE TO EXIST
"Animal Farm" the book. Nevermind, I got a 2 anyway.
Turn into a clown cow. HONK HONK.
(3)YOUR NOSE TURNS RED
UNFORTUNATELY, YOU BECOME MOODOLPH, NOT A COW CLOWN
Bench press the earth to gain super-cowly muscles.
(5)YOU ARE NOW THE STRONGEST COW ON THE PLANET
YOU CAN LIFT ENTIRE FARMS OFF THE GROUND
Fly into space, out of Dyson Cow. Activate radiation-attracting device outside.
(3)THE DEVICE IS FAULTY
ONLY A SMALL AMOUNT OF RADIATION IS ATTRACTED
Meditate to get some slick mental powers.
(4)YOU ARE NOW A PSYCHIC COW
Educate the populace about the new evolution
(2)EVERYONE IS STILL TOO BUSY PANICKING TO PAY ATTENTION
AFTER THAT DELICIOUS BURGER (I WONDER WHAT MEAT THEY USED, MAYBE GRASS MEAT) I USE MY SHOTGUN TO SAVE THE WORLD... BY KILLING ALL OF HUMANITY. ALSO, USE DIVINE POWERS TO GIVE ALL COWS RADIATION IMMUNITY, BECAUSE COW JESUS
(YOU CAN'T DO MULTIPLE UNRELATED ACTIONS IN ONE TURN)
(5)YOU GO ON A RAMPAGE
YOU KILL ABOUT 90% OF THE PEOPLE ON YOUR CONTINENT
(First roll on the forums ever, 1. This is promising)
Become the leader of the EU
(4)SUCCESS
EVERYONE IS TOO BUSY PANICKING TO CONTEST YOUR CLAIM TO LEADERSHIP
BANKRUPTCY COLLEGE IS GO
(3)YOUR COLLEGE ISN'T VERY POPULAR
BANKRUPTCY ISN'T REALLY A USEFUL SKILL TO HAVE
Increase mass hysteria with my almighty haunting moo!
(3)PEOPLE ARE SLIGHTLY SPOOKED, BUT NOBODY IS REALLY PAYING ATTENTION TO YOU AT THIS POINT
Equip cow anarchist with radiation suits and free copies of The Anarchist Cookbook.
(2)THEY DON'T MAKE RADIATION SUITS FOR COWS, UNFORTUNATELY.
TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, COWS CAN'T READ.
UMMM,
CAUTERISE WOUND BY GOING SOMEWHAT CLOSER TO THE SUN,
BUT NOT TOO CLOSE.
AND ALSO TRY TO WARM THE EARTH UP A BUNCH IN DOING THIS
SO EVERYONE DIES.
(3)UNFORTUNATELY, THE HEAT DOES NOT REACH THE PLANET
IT DOES CAUTERIZE THE WOUND SLIGHTLY, THOUGH
ABSORBS THE MINI SUNS POWER AND THE RADIATION SPIKE TO COMPLETELY OBLITERATE THE DYSON COW.
((No matter what roll I get, this cannot go wrong.))
((Edit: Speaking of, I would have thought absorbing the radiation would mean I absorbed all of it, not just a little.))
A SINGLE COW CAN ONLY ABSORB SO MUCH RADIATION
(3)YOU USE SOME SOLAR-RADIATION POWER TO FIRE A LASER
IT DOESN'T DO MUCH
HEAT-O-METER
|H|----:-----|C|
RADIATION DISTANCE: 2
PANIC STATUS: 2SPOOKED4ORDER
Author
Topic: ROLL TO COW CHAPTER III: MONSTER COWS ON THE MOON (Read 15228 times)