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Whisperwhip: a megabeast steakhouse (Circus Edition)

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Taupe:
The eastern dwarven civilization has collapsed under the weight of the goblin invasions. While these nasty monsters are scary in their own right, they cannot conquer the mountains, where the western Mountainhome has built countless forts to repel the enemy. With the greenskin armies thus contained within the Jungle of Muscles, the dwarven council turns its head toward a greater issue still, a force so evil, so ancient and powerful, that it cannot be ignored any longer. An elder being that escaped the underworld in times forgotten, author of the forsaken books that brought dark magic and necromancy to the mortal races. Under the leadership of this Archfiend, the humans of the north, as well as their elven slaves and a few renegate necromancers, have united to create the greatest civilization on the Windy Realm: the Lavender Empire.

The name of this archfiend is Ukas Archescort, the Ferocious Nails, first spawn of the underworld, crusher of nations, law-giver of the strongest empire to exist. Scourge of elvenkind to some, goddess to some others, and mistress of the dark arts by all accounts.

Also: a giraffe.

In order to learn more on this legendary creature and the dangers it represents, the monarch of the Citadel of Clutches, queen Cog Floorquests, first of her kind, will dispatch seven unlucky dwarves to the northern continent. Led by Dumat Constructmirrored, they call themselves the Wilted Sack. Their task will be daring, for they will be the first of all dwarvenkind to settle on the northern continent, where most of civilization has been eradicated by the fabled titans.

Whisperwhip is founded in 97

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Spoiler: DFMA links (Spoiler major spoilers, use as reference) (click to show/hide)DFMA maps:
Early year 113 (17yo)
Early year 117 (20yo)
Early year 127 (30yo)
Early year 137 (40yo)
Early year 147 (50yo)
Here's the index:
1-Olin and the titans
2-The Great Skypig
3-Of Towers and Trollblood
4-The Great wars: Battle of Dogshatter
5-Overview
6-Atir and Gica
7-106: The Doorless Year
8-Martial law
9-How to not follow basic instructions
10-Suddenly, a savannah
11-Happy Birthday!
12-The top 100 trendiest weapon names of 107
13-A small history lesson (the world map post)
14-Don't forget to bring your spare werewolf
15-A story of caves and technology
16-The ''Project''
17-To kill a Mockingcat
18-the chaos of Bosda
19-Protect the Quern!
20-The first Grand Meeting
21-Gods of Blood and Bling
22-Cripples, bastards, and bloated things
23-Terrible trading
24-Beauty and the Beasts
25-Uninvited guests
26-Dumpatorium Drama
27-Schrödinger's queen
28-Lava 101
29-Kicking into gear
30-And the land shall burn
31-Don't split the party
D1-Dumat's intermission 1
32-Clothsgiving
33-Kel
34-The great animal purge
35-Attempted baby heist
36-Murder mysteries
37-The chicken
38-Slaughterdome
39-Immortal-D: bird-puncher
40-Necromancers have feelings too!
41-Justice is served, supper isn't
42-Fire and blood
43-War never changes...
44-Towerpartners
45-Set fire to the rain
46-Pincushion
47-Life finds a way...
48-Spring cleaning
49-Crimson and lavender
50-Dump and dumper
51-The prophecy
52-The great cave offensive
53-Exploding kitten
54-Pimpin' the place
55-Shortcomings
56-The unclogging
57-This place needs more miasma
58-Dump or die
59-A web of problems
60-Ambush!
61-Enemy at the gate
62-Showdown
63-Aftermath
64-The dive
65-Fishing
66-A table
67-The dig
68-Golden gate
69-Snake shaft
70-Stealing candy from a dragon
71-Deadly weapons
72-Between a rock and a hard place
73-Rovod, greatest champion
74-A machine for skypigs
75-Smoothbanners
76-Forgotten anomalies
77-The next generation
78-The candy store
79-Modesty
80-Colossal blunder
81-Tearchance
82-National Badass
83-Royal blood
84-Chekov's corpse
85-Feast
86-The lone gunmen
87-Breadcrumbs
88-Pandora's Hatch
89-Running from evil
90-The Doomforest agenda
91-On the safe handling of Megabeasts
92-Teline's tale
93-Ageless mutant ninja turtles
94-Pacific Rim
95-Priorities

Taupe:
CHAPTER 1: Olin and the titans
Spring of 97

The 7 founders quickly get to work during the first year. Their leader Dumat orders the miners of the Wilted Sack to excavate the side of a small hill, turning it into a collection of rooms and future stockpiles. Alas, they strike an aquafier two floors below. The two miners have a plan, tho, and soon set themselves to work, slowly but steadily preparing a clever way past the underwater lake. They are ready to unleash the full power of their genius, and... both miners accidentally get pushed underwater while fighting off a wild grey langur.

A third dwarf tries to complete their work, but manages only to create a gigantic pool in the middle of the fortress.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)Spoiler (click to show/hide)(Pictures taken with overseer twenty years later, showing the overgrown ruins of the old fort)

A year has passed, and the dwarves of the Wilted Sack are settled in a disappointing muddy complex overlooking two giant death-pools. The survivors, joined by some naive migrants, decide to move way north, and abandon the first outpost to it's watery antics. They create a nice entrance atop the mountainside, and relocate all the animals atop the mountain, where a convenient plateau allows them to feed themselves. The mountain is divided by a canyon, at the bottom of which runs a meagre river. The deported colonists open a wall down below, alongside the river. Now the fortress easily can easily access some running water, meaning the dwarves will be able to rely on a fresh source of water and fish in case of a siege...

A siege, there will be indeed! Only a few months have passed since the Wilted Sack has relocated to the mountain, when a titan appears! Half the stockpiles are still to be moved to the new mountain settlement; a desert rock formation that, after some tests, seems to be devoid of any aquafier. There is no time for any last-minute item-grabbing. The new fortress is sealed off; animals are hurried inside and butchered, and anything that hasn't been moved is to remain at the drowned base until further notice.

Thankfully, the new fort's design philosophy revolves around the idea that anything can and will go wrong. As such, the wood stockpiles have been moved inside. The rock layers excavated so far contain neither coal nor metal, and digging goes slowly with most of the pickaxes lying in the aquafier along with ghosts. The next best thing (or rather, the only thing) is to make wooden swords and axes, as well as shields made of palm. With little to do in this isolated hideout, a few dwarves volunteer to form a militia, and begin to train for the ultimate encounter. For a full year, the rest of the fortress starts to engrave every single thing. If they are to be stuck here, they will make it pretty, by Armok!

By all accounts, the dwarven calendar has now reached the year 100. This is no time for celebration, however. Outside, screams and roars echo in the plains, reaching the dwarves of Whisperwhip even in their rock shelter. A second titan now walks the realm, scarier than anything else they've seen! The lock-down is now a double lock-down. Army management is not exactly something this fort excels at, however, so in the midst of this chaotic announcement, the burrow restrictions have been temporarily disabled. Outside, the Titans have wandered around for a while, attracted by the old base. As such they haven't found, or bothered to look for, the new one. At this point, the army has been preparing for a fight for over a year. They have no real weapon, but their devotion to the fortress is real. The fortress is still untouched, but the last ration of meat was consumed months ago, crops are growing sparse, and there is nothing left to fish in the river. The siege much be broken. At the same time, the appearance of the second titan has put an end to the status-quo. Both monsters are rushing toward the mountain. Now is the time to strike! The militia gather their wooden weapons and shields, and assemble in the entrance hall. In a few moments, the dwarves of Whisperwhip will enter the ultimate battle, where death or glory are the only two outcomes.

Meanwhile, meet Olin Bookdeer. She is 16, and her cat has been missing for a year, obviously stuck outside after the lock-down of 99. Olin is a young animal trainer, and she definitely ain't letting Mrs Scruffles fend for herself out there, it's dangerous. So Olin grabs a crossbow and sneak outside as she spots that the curfew has been accidentally deactivated.

As the militia charges down the mountainside, they soon see a gory and frightening scene. A plain filled with ashes and burnt spider webs. In the middle of it all, lies the corpse of a titan. Luckily, the two beasts must have fought among themselves, and one of them was killed. A great victory and relief for the Wilted Sack! If they are lucky, the other beast has been injured in the clash. Maybe their wooden equipment can finish the job. The soldiers march on...

They wander the surrounding plains. Soon enough, they stumble upon the corpse of the second titan, slain by a single bolt right in his only Cyclopean eye.

Olin Bookdeer hasn't found her kitten, and returns home alone. Her quiver is lighter by two missing steel bolts. A quick look at her character profile reveals the unbelievable. An untrained teenager has slain both titans on her own. Olin has lost her pet, but as she returns home, she receives her own squad, and our greatest living quarters, as well as the admiration of her people. A hero is born...

Taupe:
CHAPTER 2: The great Skypig
Year 101

The end of 100 passes swiftly, with the milicia now at 40 dwarves, and the population reaching an impressive 180 souls (pets don't have souls). The new year starts with a new titan spawn, because of course, and this one doesn't fuck around. Quickly, it rushes past the corpses of his brothers and charges at the fort.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)Luckily for the local residents, they have a strong stone door protecting them.

...Oh it can break doors. Hum... assemble the guards!

The third titan is slain as it emerges into the main staircase, wounded by random dwarves, and shot in the head by Olin, who racks up her third titan Kill. She just turned 17. Olin is now the pride of her fortress. When off-duty, she spends her time telling stories to children and inspiring the youngsters. She has a noble heart, but she is easily broken emotionally, and so the presence of children help her remain sane.

As a single door is obviously bad at holding enemies, the members of the Wilted Sack start their first big project. They are to turn the entrance into the base of a tower, and make it five floors high. On the third floor will be a backdoor leading to the plateau, where the animal pastures and farms are situated. (which in turn they intend to wall up from the outside). The upper floor shall allow marksdwarves to shoot down anyone climbing up the mountain. They don't have real weapons, but trade has given them enough leather to make a quiver for every dwarf, and they have wood enough to give each one a crossbow to match. They also have lots of bolts, albeit made of wood. Forty shooters and a high ground should compensate for the terrible weapon quality they wield.

More important than the military supplies is the design of the fort. Everything is centered around a central room, with a double staircase, fully engraved, and a statue on each corner. The central staircase is connected to the fortress wings by doors. This is important. Since one side is the end of the map, one side is a river, and another is air (see: mountain side) the floors have to be rather small. At least for the first 10 floors, that is. Engravings are awesome, but the upper levels are surrounded by air, sand, or dirt, which are unfit for glorious artworks. That's why the fort ends up looking essentially like a nuclear silo. The missile is a pig.

This pig is sitting atop the plateau as the tower is being dug. The pasture designation has not been modified after the masonry construction began, so this asshole walks above the tower as a dwarf with zero concern for animals is removing the grass floor to build the tower's corner. The pig promptly falls down in the tower.

It crashes on a masterpiece statue, topples it, and falls on the floor with it. A section of the floor falls under them.

The pig, the floor and the statue land on another masterpiece statue, and another floor. Etc etc.

Fast foward a bit, and at the bottom of the staircase, a miner is trampled by a pig, 14 statues, 84 floor tiles, about 20 cats, half a dozen dwarves, and a bunch of random crap. The pig promptly recreates the ending scene from Carrie before dying from said recreation.

The staircase being mostly airtight, with doors blocking every major pathway, a giant cloud of dust, concrete and sand rushes upward; the remnants of the floor and statues that collapsed. 45 dwarves collapse, die or fall unconscious as the cloud rushes to the surface and scatters around the plateau. All the miners are part of the katamari damaci statue thingy, and thus dead. All the competent builders are busy in the tower; they are affected by the cloud as well. Not only that, but since every main corridor was south (where the floor collapsed) basically every floor is now isolated. The dining hall entraps 50 souls, as well as the cat national association. The dorms are locked down too, meaning more stuck dwarves. The food stockpiles, the workshops...

Nobody can access either wood nor stone. Everyone who is able to deal with the acquisition or manipulation of these resources is either dead or filling his lungs with concrete dust. The cats that died in the explosion were all pets, so people start to go very unhappy. Most of the flooring was engraved, and all the statues were masterworks or close to (after the sculptor made an artifact). The guy promptly goes insane. He drowns his wife in the river, and proceed to bash people with random objects. The milicia starts to put people down as they go insane. People in the dinning hall start a brawl, tantrums are thrown left and right. The sane members of the fort manage to contain the situation barely, and repair parts of the floor by digging walls to get more stone, just in time for two ambushes.

The civilians who went mad were wimps, and most have not gone insane yet. The milicia, tho... they have spent all their time since 98 training, deep in the barracks. They promptly crush the goblins, and aquire steel and iron whips (fitting, considering the place's name). They, however, dont deal well with the sun. Soldiers start vomiting, going unhappy, some are even forced to drink said vomit (because reasons) and go super unhappy. As they return to the fortress, THEY start throwing tantrums, and that's when shit truly start hitting the fan. Olin being a gentle soul, is removed from the milicia and kept to her chambers with the children, so she doesn't witness the downfall of her comrades.

The milicia has defeated goblins unharmed, and a teenager casually slayed 3 Titans, yet the fortress was to be defeated by a pig and a ball of light. Out of 180 dwarves, less than 50 would survive. The yet-sane dwarves are busy digging bedrooms and engraving stuff to keep people happy. Olin desperately tries to start parties to lift the group's spirit. The general acquires an artifact bone buckler (made from someone's butchered son), and names his sword, but he is shot down by the crazy bowmaker while the two are taking a walk in the woods. A grey langur steals both artifacts and vanishes forever. Raiding kobolds also snatch two other artifacts.

The barracks turn into a bloodshed as each dead miliciadwarf killed by his fellow teammates incites those friends to also go berserk. Civilians are hunted down like rabbits, and the dorms turn into a warzone, with a group of kids armed with butchering knives murdering the fuck out of anyone sleeping just to grab their clothes. At this point, any sane dwarf is now either a catacomb engraver, or a coffin maker. Bodies are hurled downstairs in the crypts as miners are struggling to keep the place bigger than the cumulative volume of deadened dorfs. Ghosts are roaming free, some quiet others most disturbing. Interestingly, at this point the only productive member of the army is actually... a ghost himself? He volunteers with taking down crazy folks, before being put to rest with a nice slab for his help, both pre and post-death.

Olin finally falls prey to melancholy, and starve herself to death as she tells stories to the kids. As they learn of her fatal emotional state, the miners abandon the regular graves and start to dig out a large tomb. The best miners and stoneworkers of Whisperwhip create their greatest masterpiece yet: a round and engraved room with a coffin in the middle. A statue of Olin is made, as well as 3 others, of the beasts she had slain. As her dehydrated corpse is placed in her resting tomb, the ground is decorated with rutile, in the pattern of an arrow, each point striking at one of the statues. A miner completes the work by running a pickaxe through the skulls of his two coworkers, before someone smashes his head with a boulder. Great job, guys.

The fortress mourns, but miraculously presses on as migrants arrive, bolstering the numbers back to fifty after two waves. Of the pre-Skypig era, only a handful of dwarves remain: the administrators (who stayed hidden in their room), some of their spouses, and a few miners who avoided the blunt of the civil war by taking refuge in the catacombs.

 Whisperwind carries on...

Taupe:
CHAPTER 3: Of Towers and Trollblood
Year 102

The months after the Skypig civil war bring peace, which in turn attracts new immigrants. Most of the newcomers are drafted to fill the military; the area has proven to be dangerous, and very few tasks are actually required around the base. With so many dead dwarves, and basically no animals around save for cats, the only busy citizens are the catacomb diggers and the coffin-makers. Whisperwhip has plenty of free rooms, enough stockpiled food and drinks for years, and little to hunt or fish.

Before the year is over, the army is back to four squads of ten dwarves, each with his own whip and leather outfit. Everyone else is basically running around naked. While this mass-scale BDSM microcosm may seem hilarious on paper, it does lead to some issues. With so many dead/murdered/forgotten dwarves around, and little contact with the outside world for over a year, the fortress is now filled with blood, bones, and mostly rotten clothes. A gigantic stockpile of used vestments, both from dwarves and invaders, is piled up near the trade depot. Because elves are gullible as shit, the economy of the fort soon revolves around the never-ending export of rags by the ton. The dwarves use this opportunity to acquire some weaponry, and stockpile on arrows, for no real reason. They just want the clothes gone.

The next year marks the end of the calm times. Peace flies out the window as the arrival of 2 consecutive sieges march on the hills. The poorly-built entrance tower is now complete, so the dwarves try to bunker inside and let the army take care of things from the battlements. Alas, absurdly terrible military management prevent anyone from actually doing their job, and a random she-dwarf runs outside to meet a force of trolls.

Random dwarf? Wait, no... this is the granddaughter of Lady Asmel, the commander of the most endured squad. Asmel has led the few surviving members of her squad through the carnage of the civil war. Her grandchild has joined the army a year ago, and seeks to echo the bravery of her mentor. Training has paid off, for her ability to use lower-end bludgeoning devices is met only by her ability to block using also lower end devices. She announces that she is going to take down the enemy on her own. Some lock the door and mark the fool as dead. While thirty goblins march from the west, she has engaged the ten trolls to the south. A few moments pass, and watchers atop the tower are amazed to see that Mistem has used her shield as cover while shooting down a distant goblin, and has been backing to base slowly by tumbling backward as the trolls try to corner her. Three of them have fallen so far to her crossbow whipping. Not only that, she has tricked the trolls into running far ahead of their goblin masters. The commanders order their underlings to make a sortie. The men gank up on the trolls, and scatter across the mountainside. Thanks to having the higher ground, operation ''finally learn to use a crossbow and fire at will, damnit'' can begin. Death rains on the enemies of dwarvenkind below, as members of this makeshift army finally learn what aiming and gunning is all about. Not a single dwarven life is lost in this battle, while the blood of their foes flood the valley below. The dwarves inside are way too busy hauling trashed clothes around to bother with enemy skeletons; from this day on, the valley below becomes a massive corpse-based intimidation zone.

Soldier Mistem is also promoted as the leader of a new squad, which she calls the Squeezing Walls

Some more observant dwarves eventually notice something peculiar. Despite the total lack of precipitations in this region, the blood from all the battles eventually dripped down into the nearby canyon, ran against with the river, and ended up washing off into the drinking area. The inhabitants of Whisperwhip are thus drinking troll blood on a daily basis. Only makes them stronger.

The year ends with another siege, which is fended off in the tower's entrance. Except for a few incidents involving the entrance statues being turned into troll-based ranged weapons, the troops are able to win the fight thanks to choke points, and sheer enemy stupidity. Once again the fortified uphill position proves formidable, as the army can just crush the opponent by running downhill to meet their foes.

The year of 104 brings another period of peace, safe for the fort's remaining artefacts being stolen by kobolds. Someone had apparently stored them outside in the ugly cloth mountain along with items of lesser value.

This year is also renown as the time where the fort discovers the fabled technology of ''bins''. Suddenly, the ever-unbusy mass of peasants  find themselves with stuff to do outside of ''rag-hauling season''. The massive and numerous storage areas are quickly made obsolete, as civilians condense the fort's belonging into smaller, more efficient areas. As most of the population is amazed by this new-found ability to not use a square meter of floor for each earring, the masons decide to turn the plateau pasture into a walled-off area, and flatten a the nearby unequal hill into a plain, making room for protected farmlands, that shall in time be walled-off as well.

As winter comes and go, Whisperwhip's citizens start to feel confident, and safe. It is time, they agree, to start focusing on more ambitious projects.

They are about to be proven very, very wrong.

Taupe:
CHAPTER 4: The great wars: Battle of Dogshatter
Year 105

This year opens with some small sieges, and 2 titans showing up. The militia, now 60 dwarves strong, manage to take all of them down, but not before a miner is eaten raw. One of the titans is turned into a thousand pieces of tallow.

Seeing that the wall is holding, but barely, the dwarves start two projects

1- A mining excavation. The first layers of the mining complex are striped almost bare, save for a few support pillars, in order to acquire enough slate for a new wall. (because making blocks is not something intuitive) Space is limited up in the mountain. It's time to go deeper. A single staircase has proven disastrous, so they dig a long corridor, and intend to have the entrance to the lower levels at the end of this hall, possibly protected by bridges. The miners start digging holes, and soon find themselves stranded deep underneath the defensive corridor, while an architect tries to create bridges and get them out. Since all the mecanists and architects were drafted, this proves long and difficult.

2- The main entrance is to be extended. Walls on each side, and a new forward gate. That way, anyone taking down the first gate will have to endure crossbow fire from both sides while they work at the second, older gate leading inside the tower. Because design flaws are what this fortress does best, ( after titanslayin' ), most of the builders decide to make the fortifications before they make the ramp next to it, and soon find themselves locked atop the wall by their companions, in a ''fortif--dwarf---fortif---dwarf---fortif formation.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Meanwhile, the guys levelling the field are having a massive problem. Some animal traps were randomly constructed and placed around the fort about 5 years ago for no real reason. Because nobody dares to remove them for some obscure motive, the dwarves just channelled around them, leading to various abrupt hills with a trap on top, right in the middle of the construction project.

The plan is to have this new tower extension double as a small dungeon only reachable through the barricades. At the bottom shall be the jails, and in the middle, the war dog training grounds. That way any prisoner that breaks free will have to deal with doors, a bunch of war dogs, and then the militia patrolling atop the dungeon/wall. Nobody knows what to do with those like, 60 dogs prior to training, so the canines get penned outside the fort, on a nearby hill. They are promptly forgotten, 'cause stuff on a different z level might as well not exist.

The new siege arrives around this point. There is always a new siege in Whisperwhip. 30 trolls, 95 goblins, including many weapon masters and a large group of archers. Archers are the bane of every dwarf in this proud army. It includes many shooty dwarves, but their training comes from randomly pointing at targets below until sieges end or the commander gets bored and orders a sortie. They absolutely cannot win a fight against real, trained archers, let alone goblin snipe masters. A retreat is immediately ordered to the burrows below. With the stockpile  off-limit, some butchers decides to abandon what he was doing, and drops what he was carrying. AKA: SOMEONE DROPPED A DEAD COW RIGHT IN THE MAIN DOORWAY.

To sum things up, half the work force is stranded atop a half-finished wall, the other half has locked itself under a bridge in the mine. This new wall isn't even half complete. It has no doors. The previous door is held wide open by a dead bovine thanks to incompetence and terrible crisis management... Once this force reaches the fort, everyone and their mother is fucking dead. Soldiers cant hold that many fiends. Not with archers on their side and a giant gap leading straight to the main staircase.

It's time to get the miners out of this stupid hole. Militia commander Asmel orders them to create a new squad, and station them outside of the pit. They respond to this by promptly falling asleep. Screw this squad, it's cancelled now. Within the second, engravers start to depict incredible sculptures of ''miner dude X'' imploring not to be demoted, among a bunch of angry dwarves. He is seen crying, or confused. All of the new dining hall's walls are covered by this event. No, I'm sorry sculptors, but he was in the military for 5 minutes, received exactly one order to climb a ramp, and didn't do it because he was asleep for the whole duration. I am pretty damn sure he is not as broken and emotionally shattered as you are depicting it. Plus, how is that more relevant than, say, ALL THOSE HORRIBLE EVENTS YOU WENT THROUGH?

Our workforce is apparently doomed to death by thirst or impalement, so blocking the door or finishing the wall is kinda out of the question. The trolls and goblins charge from the south, ready to rush inside the fort. That's when memory of the new building's secondary purpose comes back. A training facility. That's right, those dogs are still outside nearby...

Sixty of them, conveniently located near the fort, right above the incoming army. The pen restriction is deleted; all the dogs come rolling down the hill, creating a canine flood that ensnares the incoming foes before they can reach the door. They are right in range for the archers, and the dogs sacrifice themselves to hold the line and buy the marks-dwarves some time. The south flank is broken, at the cost of 57 dogs, and 30 cats. Here's the thing. Captain Mistem has a lot of cats. Like, really. When the dwarves retreated to the top of the tower, the door had to be locked. Mistem was the last dwarf to do so, and behind her tailed enough kitties to overthrown the local government. There's exactly one door protecting the fort's core from the incoming onslaught, and by Armok is it not going to remain open 5 more minutes to save all those pets. A bunch of trolls make it inside despite the dog flood. The dead cow holding the outer door right open does an unsurprisingly terrible job at stopping them. The cat cluster, however, does prevents the invaders from simply flying through the entrance hall. The trolls stop for a snack, which is enough a distraction as the army needs to get the jump on them.

The wall holds, but at what cost? All the pets are gone. There is still no defence against archers. As soon as they get in range, the workers atop the wall are toasted. The southern attack was merely a glimpse of the numbers that are marching on these lands. It's fair to assume that the goblin equivalent of Mance Rayder's army still stands strong outside the wall, bidding their time, testing the weaknesses of Whisperwhip. They give the fortress no time to recover; the next assault begins...

A score of archers move from the west, led by a great weapon master, who decides to use the unfinished constructions to climb through the wall and reach the battlements. The easiest way for him to do so is to climb a small random mini-hill. That's right, the enemy leader steps on an un-removed animal trap. He is now alone, entangled, right in front of 60 angry dwarves with crossbows. They aren't great shots, it's hard to miss all your bolts against a target 10 feet away. If you've seen the execution scene from the movie Heroes, yeah it's a bit like that. The sky darkens with a ridiculous amount of bolts flying westward. The volley hit the goblin leader, sending him flying many, many squares below and backward. He lands on the ground, amidst his own archers. Within a second, he proceeds to achieve a liquefied state, promptly occupying a 20 feet radius spot on the ground.

The archers look at their atomized leader, and decide that seriously, fuck this shit. They head north instead, to war with the humans. Miraculously, the workers on the wall survived. The miners finally find a way out of their dumb pit and rush to the surface, helping the wall-makers out. As soon as every single worker of the fort is finally safe, a new siege arrives, as big as the last one.

The elven caravan is promptly slaughtered as they stop to wonder why the cliff-side is covered in dog parts. Some hunters and woodcutters are shot down as well. As  the dwarves prepare for the worst (mentally, definitely not with any kind of actual plan), the goblins finish the elven traders and avoid Whisperwhip altogether. They seem to be headed north as well. A few are shot as they venture too close, but it seems that the goblin nation has launched a full offensive against the Lavender Empire. The members of the Wilted Sack lie right in the warpath, however. They know more will come. If any siege decides to stop by the fort and launch an attack as the first invaders did, this will be the end of Whisperwhip.

Word is received from an elven ambassador. The utter annihilation of their last caravan, as well as weird accidents the year before, has made them very mad. They claim that last year's merchants were ambushed by dwarf bandits, while it was obviously their fault for accidentally dropping an angry bull's cage while travelling nearby. They also mention that Dumat the broker dared to offer wooden goods, for their... wooden goods. Long story short, the elves are cunts.

With hordes of goblins and trouble from the elven nation, Whisperwhip's future seems gloomy at best. Can the might of the brave soldiers triumph, despite the shaky construction projects and sub-par weaponry they wield?

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