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Author Topic: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée  (Read 1496282 times)

Sheb

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Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

SirQuiamus

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18931 on: June 04, 2016, 01:03:15 pm »

The Conservative Treehouse
11/10
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mainiac

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18932 on: June 04, 2016, 01:25:19 pm »

To lazy to travel back in time to the lax era when my ancestors migrated.
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Frumple

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18933 on: June 04, 2016, 01:50:21 pm »

I'unno, I'd probably not even want to go back to the lax era when my earliest ancestors migrated, personally. No interest in dealing with megafauna and subzero temperatures whilst armed, at best, with sticks. I mean... sure, the immigration paperwork and processing was literally nonexistent, because they probably didn't know how to read or write, and the existent government was something along the lines of entirely unmetaphorical large hungry bears. But you also got ate. Think that offsets the balance, a bit. The diseases and exposure and starvation... also bad! Monetary cost was zero, though. Don't think they had currency. Still. Sometimes laxity is less than positive.
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mainiac

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18934 on: June 04, 2016, 01:55:20 pm »

whilst armed, at best, with sticks

God, why wouldn't you just invent gunpowder and airplanes?
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18935 on: June 04, 2016, 01:56:38 pm »

I'unno, I'd probably not even want to go back to the lax era when my earliest ancestors migrated, personally. No interest in dealing with megafauna and subzero temperatures whilst armed, at best, with sticks. I mean... sure, the immigration paperwork and processing was literally nonexistent, because they probably didn't know how to read or write, and the existent government was something along the lines of entirely unmetaphorical large hungry bears. But you also got ate. Think that offsets the balance, a bit. The diseases and exposure and starvation... also bad! Monetary cost was zero, though. Don't think they had currency. Still. Sometimes laxity is less than positive.
Tfw you were born too late to take part in the tea race

Tfw you will never sell Ceylon's finest whilst dying of TB

Tfw you will never collaborate with whatever invader of the week arrives

Feels bad man

Frumple

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18936 on: June 04, 2016, 02:00:23 pm »

God, why wouldn't you just invent gunpowder and airplanes?
Too busy being eaten by giant bears, mostly. You have to admit it's fairly difficult to bootstrap millennia of technological progress while you're being eaten by a giant bear.
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mainiac

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18937 on: June 04, 2016, 02:01:32 pm »

Well just call the police on your cellphone.
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Amperzand

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18938 on: June 04, 2016, 02:04:33 pm »

Navigate to safety with GPS, it'll be fiiiine.
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Muh FG--OOC Thread
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Quote from: Shadowlord
Is there a word that combines comedy with tragedy and farce?
Heiterverzweiflung. Not a legit German word so much as something a friend and I made up in German class once. "Carefree despair". When life is so fucked that you can't stop laughing.
http://www.collinsdictionary.com

Frumple

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18939 on: June 04, 2016, 02:08:57 pm »

The police were unfortunately eaten by mammoths. Don't ask how or why herbivores ate the policemen. No one knew, and you don't inquire as to further details from the man eating mammoths. The cell towers... we don't talk about what happened to the cell towers. There wasn't any reception. There was such a lack of reception it wouldn't come back until over ten thousand years later, and no one will ever find the archaeological evidence of those towers' existence.

Don't even ask about the GPS satellites. Those went earlier. You know that crater down in the lower americas? Yeah. They think it was a meteor, these days. In reality it's what happens when you compact an excessively redundant GPS satellite system into a ball and deorbit 'em.

Seriously, shit went down back in those days. Times were interesting in the most chinese of senses, which was doubly concerning considering china didn't yet exist.
« Last Edit: June 04, 2016, 02:10:38 pm by Frumple »
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mainiac

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18940 on: June 04, 2016, 02:10:24 pm »

Well just climb in your SUV.  I dont think bears can get into those.  You really seem to be going out of your way to play the victim.

which was doubly concerning considering china didn't exist, yet.

Well it's not that weird seeing as that phrase was probably invented in the english speaking world.  As we learned from Stargate SG:1, they spoke english back in ancient egypt.
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Sheb

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18941 on: June 04, 2016, 02:11:16 pm »

I love when mainiac pretend to be annoying in one sentence, just to be genuinely annoying in the next.
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Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Frumple

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18942 on: June 04, 2016, 02:12:10 pm »

They were very big bears, m. The SUVs unfortunately didn't work. Seriously options were explored and then the options were eaten by bears. Turned out the sticks were the best way to survive. Less noise, less visible, etc. The bears don't eat you if they can't see you... usually, anyway.
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mainiac

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18943 on: June 04, 2016, 02:15:22 pm »

Thanks Obama!
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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[CAN_INTERNET]
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Shadowlord

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Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #18944 on: June 04, 2016, 02:16:59 pm »

Also the lack of doors and walls wouldn't help, I'm sure:
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<Dakkan> There are human laws, and then there are laws of physics. I don't bike in the city because of the second.
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