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[GlyphGryph]

Granted. A number of LEGO appear in your throat. I do so hope you enjoy them before suffocating.

I wish I had a (somehow) healthy pizza I could enjoy eating for lunch.

[Phantom of The Library]

Granted, you have a greaseless pizza that you made yourself.

I wish I had a pet brick that loved me.

[Azthor]

Granted, it demonstrates its love by punting itself onto your head from the second floor.

I wish for Hannibal to be be forced to see his sister being cannibalised over and over.

[GlyphGryph]

Granted, you have a greaseless pizza that you made yourself.

Wait, how is this corrupted? Mmm...

[Loud Whispers]

I wish for Hannibal to be be forced to see his sister being cannibalised over and over.

Granted, it's made into a movie.

Oh wait.

I wish I had Phantom's violent brick.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted. It shows you love by smashing into your crotch.

I wish I had a pet dorf.

[Alternatecash]

After a week, your FPS drops to 2, and everything you love is covered in boiling rock.

I wish that truth was beauty, and beauty, truth.

[Azthor]

Granted, but... UristMcPet is in a fey mood.

I wish to be completly invulnerable, physically and mentally, while still being the sole overdeity around.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted. You become a giant "candy" wall.

I wish to be in a fey mood. :3

[Loud Whispers]

You get possessed instead.

3 days later, you find yourself without socks, confused and bored.

I wish I had a logical paradox in a jar.

[Phantom of The Library]

Granted, the jar breaks and spills paradox everywhere, but at the same time doesn't break, but you still have paradox all over you.

I wish I came back from the dead.

[Devling]

You do, but you got buried/cremated, so you just die again. Cry me a river, OH YOU CAN'T YOUR DEAD AND TEARS EVAROPATE IN HELL.

I wish for my torment to end.

[Repulsion]

Your own, personal torment ends, whatever it may be. It is replaced by a thousand other people's torment, all bundled up into one torment-y package.

I wish for a magical pencil that could draw anything... and bring it into reality.

[Phantom of The Library]

Granted, you decide to eat something before you begin drawing and while you are gone someone decides to try it out and draws Cthulhu.

I wish that I could crawl out of the infernal pit that I have been cast into and wreck revenge upon he who sent me there.

[rarborman]

Granted you can you just dont know how to do so.

I wish for a picture web host that works with my phone.