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[NJW2000]

Sorry, stuck in countryside, on FON right now, at whim of parents. Peak District lovely, but having trouble keeping up. List updated in order of post.

[Amperzand]

{Individually spoilered by month for your convenience.}

Just for starters, why are there staircases everywhere?

Grr, this was going to be a screenshot, but I'm a little too much of a nubderp. Suffice it to say, too many staircases.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

15 Timber;

The wooden door holding back 7/7 magma... It frightens me, especially given that my sole experience with magma so far is dying to it in Advmode.

...Why is everyone trying to catch live lands animals and failing pathfinding 101?

23 Timber;

Nobody has anything to do...

Well, all this stuff's designated to mine and blocked off, so he- Oh, a bunch of it's Damp. Crap.

26 Timber;

!!Why is there no brewer!!

Well, one of our two Potash Makers can take on new work. For the Collective!

Wait, why does everyone have mining enabled?

Winter has come!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

2 Moonstone;

Our furnace operator is apparently in a Strange Mood. Okthen.

...Thief!

Well, good luck, little guy.

He got away.

9 Moonstone;

Apparently the Furnace Operator wanted something we don't have and went berserk. Dammit, sorry.

And a stray dog murderized the poor bastard before he could do more than punch some Thresher in the nuts a few times. Hurray?

11 Moonstone;

We don't have a catacomb, at least that I can find. Well, I suppose it's up to me to place one before the berserker's ghost goes berserk.

Oh, nevermind, we do, but it's just a random room with some dead miner buried there. Okay then. Fill it with coffins, my minions, that you may be given less than glorious interment once something idiotic happens to you!

23 Moonstone;

I assigned our one peasant and some guy marked as a trader to the military, then dorfed myself as the peasant, who is our new Militia Commander.

Wait, so a bunch of other people had military skills, but none of them were in our one squad? What? Well, I guess the designated commander's the least competent dorf there.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 Opal;

Wait, our dwarves are "One of the only ones of his/her kind"? That don't sound at all good.

5 Opal;

Well, our dormitory is a few beds six tiles from the "Catacomb", so I'll start designating bedrooms under the mountain.

15 Opal;

There is a central staircase. Use it.

Also, why don't we have a magma forge? I fix.

19 Opal;

Dammit, dorfs, shut UP about the live land animals!

And the Butcher's shop is out in the main workroom? If it'd gotten any use that would've gone badly. I fix again.

20 Opal;

We have Tetrahedrite! And the new version has vein automining! Huzzah!

24 Opal;

So many masterpiece coffins. SO MANY. Also beds.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

9 Obsidian;

Ablel Irkol, Fish Dissector has been taken by a strange mood! ...Good for you, buddy. Don't go nuts and get eaten by a dog like the last guy.
 
And he claimed a Mason's Workshop.

10 Obsidian;

Oh, good, he's already building the thing, apparently a rock and some tetrahedrite ore is enough.

And I got a few more hotkeys set up.

15 Obsidian;

Our moody dorf made a rhyolite Hatch Cover! Not sure what to do with it.

Spring has arrived!

Also a miner became the mayor!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

4 Granite;

Full disclosure, I'm not necessarily ignorant enough for the traditional definition of noob, but extreme ineptitude and !!DF!!-ish logic will give you about the same result.

So many random masterpiece bits of furniture.

The hunters are complaining about low ammo, so I'll have the magma forges make some copper bolts.

9 Granite;

Lololol, cancellation spam, BUDDY! SO GLAD TO SEE YOU!

13 Granite;

The mayor really loves weapon racks. DON'T EXPORT THEM.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

12 Slate;

Some migrants showed up! Yay!

Also, there is one very fancy room in the dormitory, assign it and the office/dining room within to the current mayor.

15 Slate;

I'm just going to dig a room on the catacomb level and make it the Barracks, dorfs can deal, you can fix.

17 Slate;

Dangit, we have like thirty-five idlers, and I can't get stuff to happen!

26 Slate;

...Why is a set of damaged clothes just sitting in a vein I mined out? That wasn't there until just now, and no-one new is listed dead... Wut.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 Felsite;

I built a bridge across the river, because dorfs couldn't get across to do stuff.

4 Felsite;

I really don't understand the reasoning behind job designations here, but whatever, I leave alone. If potter wants to cut tree, potter can cut tree.

18 Felsite;

Much of the dormitory is engraved at this point, so people can have happy fun thoughts.

26/70 dorfs are too stupid to do their jobs. 

20 Felsite;

Tulon Leddomas, Beekeeper has withdrawn from society...

Have I mentioned that I can still barely tell what's going on? This fort is confusing.

Tulon Leddomas, Beekeeper has claimed a Craftsdwarf's Workshop!

22 Felsite;

Tulon Leddomas, Beekeeper has begin a mysterious construction!

Hurray, another one not going crazy!

26 Felsite;

Aaand Tulon made a mug decorated with tetrahedrite, not even worth as much as the hatch cover earlier. Yey.

Summer has arrived!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

11 Hematite;

All of the copper, and I found some Kimberlite, so maybe diamonds.

D'you know, I have never seen iron in the ground.

14 Hematite;

Our one bone carver, who arrived in the last migrant wave, is Legendary! Hurrah, masterwork bone crap!

...One of our hunters is trapped in an endless slap-fight with an Ibex or something.

16 Hematite;

A Human Caravan! Huzzah, I shall sell them our masterwork bone crap!

19 Hematite;

I bought all the metal bars they brought for a couple of masterwork chests, now to purchase other stuff, I suppose.

...And accidentally gave them a bunch of stuff as gifts... YAY NOOBFORT!

ALSO MIGRANTS!

23 Hematite;

All of your booze are belong to me.

I will now buy animals.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

2 Malachite;

I got a bunch of stuff in exchange for all of our crafts and some high-quality furniture. Hurrah.

The traders are apparently very very pleased with me. I do hope that's a good sign.

19 Malachite;

The mayor ended his ban on weapon rack exportation! Yey?

20 Malachite;

The merchants left. Bye guys, bring more foreign booze and random metals!

21 Malachite;

We have two dogs. They are both the same gender. They are both pets. Now we cannot have war dogs. Grah.

26 Malachite;

Apparently we shouldn't export ballista parts...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

8 Galena;

I added and placed notes on a new drawbridge/lever for the front entryway, just because I can't tell which of the others does that, and it seemed smart to have a reliable "CLOSE THE DAMN DOOR" switch for a fort presumably going to be filled with unlabeled magma-doom-levers.

14 Galena;

The Stray Bunny, {Tame} has been found, starved to death! D'aww... :,(

I repastured the animals to avoid further starvation.

21 Galena;

Cancellation spam is hate, cancellation spam is death.

27 Galena;
Eshtan Kizbizùshreer, Weaponsmith, has been taken by a fey mood!

Yus! We have some steel around, I hope steel artifact weapons happen!

He claimed a metalsmith's forge, so I should probably make some charcoal before bad things happen.

Autumn has arrived!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 Limestone;

Our moody weaponsmith wants metal, tanned hides, bones, silk cloth, and rock blocks. Hmm. I do not believe we have silk or tanned hide, crap.

3 Limestone;

Ok, so he has all the stuff except bones and rock blocks for some reason. Well, spare reindeer is kill, but I'unno about the rock blocks... Make more, minions! Also, the doofus decided to grab copper, instead of making a steel whatever-it-is.

6 Limestone;

And he started making whatever it is, so I got whatever I needed to get for him.

10 Limestone;

Eshtan Kizbizùshreer, Weaponsmith, has created Limnnotlith "Wispruin" a Copper Mace!

This is a copper mace. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with cushion rhyolite cabochons and encircled with bands of giant cave spider silk. This object is adorned with hanging rings of goose leather and menaces with spikes of willow. On the item is an image of an armor stand in copper. On the item is an image of a round brilliant cut gem in reindeer bone.

16 Limestone;

Our outpost liaison and dwarven caravan have arrived!

18 Limestone;

Yet more migrants!

21 Limestone;

I traded a bunch of stuff for a bunch of animals, metal, and booze.

Have I mentioned both of my forts other than this one have died due to inexplicable booze shortage?

30 Limestone;

The liaison wants warhammers, meat, seeds, quivers, fish, leather waterskins, shields/bucklers, handware, drinks, amulets, and cheese.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

7 Sandstone;

...Basically everyone has basically everything enabled, and yet no one is doing anything and my surgeons are hunting. What the hell. Somebody other than me fix this.

10 Sandstone;
Well, since everyone has mining enabled and I both don't want to fix it and want more things mined, I'm having five more copper picks forged.

21 Sandstone;

The merchants left. Well, I bought all kindsa good crap from them, so that's fine.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

11 Timber;

Why is the butcher's room full of prickle berries and plump helmets? ...I'unno, you have fun in there buddy, forever snacks or something.

17 Timber;

I've had our potter making large earthenware pots for some time, and he just started making masterpieces. Yay, masterful pottery is a thing now, on to creating crafts!

Also, apparently it's one of our normal craftsdorfs rather than an actual potter?

19 Timber;

I just restricted our craftsdwarf's workshop to our actual craftsdwarves, because my engravers were making crappy stuff instead of letting our Legendary Bone Carver do it.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

7 Moonstone;

Rith Nazomkulet, Blacksmith, withdraws from society...

And he/she claimed a magma forge...

8 Moonstone;

So many masterwork clay crafts! HUZZAH!

I'll set up ash glazing too, FOR THE STUFFS!

19 Moonstone;

He began his artifact!

Also, SO MANY MASTERWORK CLAY CRAFTS. It's like cancellation spam, but it pleases me greatly.

20 Moonstone;

Y'know, I only just realized you could designate stuffs across multiple Z-levels.

22 Moonstone;

I think I'll start making clay bricks, since they're useful building materials, basically free, and good EXP for the non-master potters.

{Incidentally, I do have some of our workshops restricted to certain dwarves to avoid important stuff getting made by random surgeons, so if you can't get a dwarf to do something with a workshop in future, check to see if he's allowed to do so.}

23 Moonstone;

Our moody smith finished his artifact, it's a bronze weapon rack with an inception-y image of itself on it, along with some drawings of our civ's king doing stuff.

25 Moonstone;

Dastot Astusan has created a masterpiece earthenware EVERYTHING! TIMES FIVE BILLION.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

4 Opal;

One of our actual professional hunters has grown attached to his copper crossbow. Apparently he's really enjoying his job of brutally torturing random animals from thirty feet away.

17 Opal;

Having just read his description, the random dwarf I dorfed myself as actually sounds a lot like me. Huh.

18 Opal;

Many of our dwarves are getting "Didn't feel anything" thoughts about the random animals they or their friends slowly murdered. Good, they will make admirable militia in an emergency.

21 Opal;

There's a lot of ore along the really deep main staircase I'm digging, I can't help but wonder if I bypassed a cavern.

22 Opal;

Having some batches of random alloy made, just for fun, and in the hope that artifacts will have interesting materials, rather than copper, silver, and random bone/leather/wood.

25 Opal;

Also, masterwork meals everywhere. Good on ya, our one cook.

26 Opal;

I found the cavern! Here's hoping it's still the first layer, otherwise we may have a slight problem, vis-a-vis our three competent soldiers.

I'm walling off the one hole into the cavern that's been made, because it's too high up the side to be useful as an entrance, and we don't want random flyers coming through and murdering us.

27 Opal;

I'm in the process of building an entrance chamber for the caverns, likely to be heavily fortified.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

10 Obsidian;

Two drawbridges, one activated from the main lever room, and one activated from within the cavern entrance chamber, seven lines of traps, four cage and three weapon, the weapon traps being loaded with copper sawblades and silver hammers, a miniature food stockpile, and a small barracks, hopefully to have a few defenders on permanent station.

16 Obsidian;

I created a new squad under Gwolfski to guard the caverns, just him, a macedwarf, and a new guy.

19 Obsidian;

The butcher's bedroom is filled with miasma... I find I really do not want to know why this is the case.

24 Obsidian;

It doesn't look like my plans for the cavern fortification will be finished by the time my turn's over, so I'm modifying them slightly, just two weapon traps, each filled with serrated copper disks, and the rest cage traps. Also, some stonefall traps around the inside of the entrance, because why the hell not. And a set of plain ol' doors, just to keep the riff-raff out.

Spring has arrived!

And that's my turn done with! I think I accomplished a great deal, I'm sure I did some things wrong, and whoever comes next will have... So many good trade goods. A bunch of things have been engraved, our military sucks and needs work, and we can easily close the doors when we need to. The food and booze aren't running out, and our trade partners like us. I'm pretty happy with what I've done.

http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=10763

{Incidentally, if there are no objections, I'm going to keep playing from my version of the save, without writing it down, just to see what happens.}

[NJW2000]

Great! DukeGod, yer up, if you're finished with surprisepalace. If not, post, and we'll have TheCheeseMaker.

Escaped countryside, now free in city. Will spend nex 12 hours getting to know the internet again.

[Gwolfski]

i wanna be the bookkeeper!!!
I want a garden!!!!
i want steel armour!
i want... a bedroom with a pool in it + garden!!!

can i have another turn in about 8 weeks? pls?

forget the room + pool + garden till my second turn if i get it!!

[Amperzand]

Last I saw you're a militia commander who has been assigned metal armor of some kind, and posted at the cavern entry chamber. #totallynotasuicidemission

[NJW2000]

Hi Guys! Gwolfski's been added again, what am I doing in the fort? I think I dorfed myself as the cook... after 8 years the masterpiece mealspam must be INTENSE

[Amperzand]

I don't think whoever was doing the masterwork meal spam was dorfed, I forget his name. Actually, just let me load up my copy of the save and check.

Edit; Some undorfed named Vucar Avuzvutok is making a masterwork Something Roast every few minutes, but NJW's just a Gem Cutter with nothing assigned because I don't do much with gems.

[Gwolfski]

whos doing it now?

[Amperzand]

Well, I didn't change anything, the save's already uploaded.

Or, y'know, if you meant who's overseeing the fort next, that would be DukeGod.

[DukeGod]

I'll actually have to step down. I'm helping painting my house and that's kinda giving me some issues with time

[NJW2000]

OK, we'll skip you for now, if you do have time, tell us whenever, we'll put you in as you asked early. Updating list...

[TheCheeseMaker]

I'm going to have to pass on my turn too.  After reading Amperzand's brilliant turn, I've decided I'm not noob enough to oversee this fort.

[Amperzand]

So, are you saying you're too good, or that I set a new standard of nubderp? Or vice-versa?

[TheFlame52]

I'm tempted to take a turn, despite being quite experienced. I just want to see if I can turn a fort constructed by ten different noobs into something manageable.

[Amperzand]

Sounds like a good idea to me, just wait a while first, the fort's in fairly manageable shape just now, if I do say so myself.