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[Naryar]

So yeah, I just had a gigantic dark strangler siege as an attack. Like easily 60 of them.

I sent three of my military, and they wiped most of it by themselves. I have also got titles for most of my 5-man military.

Note that I modded the dwarf naming conventions to try and get more badass titles.

My oldest and best military dwarf, a grand master hammer lord named Ok Handlebit, the Righteous Smear of Churches. Which isn't too bad, but a bit weird.

The second to get a title is a mace lord, Esthan Woundsquares, the Hero of Adoration. Which is pretty good although not fearsome enough.

The third, a speardwarf, got something really weird... Avuz Splatterbow the Fat Thorns of Pleasure, which sounds like something out of porn. Especially this given to the dwarf with the most phallic weapon. What the fuck, RNG ?

And the last one, an axedwarf, is Olon Pleatedstab the Cerulean Reign, which is quite badass and fitting for an axedwarf, considering that cerulean is blue and axedwarves are blue as well.

[rumpel]

Okay. What. So I get invaded by goblin snatchers. The first one was seen by Urist McFisher and the goblin ran away. A little later another snatcher (a master one this time) appeared and he succeeded but because it was the kid of my precious hunter I got really angry and she got angry too. So she shot him a few times in the spine and liver, her hunting dog tried to kill the goblin but the goblin insta-killed him with a stab in the head. Unhappy thoughts. Then another snatcher appeared but he backed off, too. He was seen too early. The master one still tried to get away, too slowly, though. A war dog attacked him and got injured. A military dorf then entered the combat scene, finally killed the thief, saving the children, but got injured as well. Annoying buggers, I hope they give me a break.

[Jimmy]

Steel-clad axelords were no match for daleks.

You've only yourself to blame for this one, friend. Whilst your legendary warriors will be quickly exterminated by daleks, you could have avoided their slaughter with better fortress design.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Lielac]

Netfocus has a vampire! He drank a migrant strand extractor, and I found him by his complaints about not having had booze in a while. Then I convicted him of the murder, and walled him in with a table and chair. And some changes of clothes. Also I've killed three miners so far (all of them legendaries, FFFFFFFF) due to magma accidents. But then it's their own damn faults for not FUCKING RUNNING AWAY. Idiots.

The baby explosion neatly took care of the population drop due to death, though. Seriously, I have 158 dorfs and 46 of them are minors. And 9 of them are peasants I haven't given specific jobs yet because they just grew up.

[bucket]

I GOT DAT PLATINUM MUFUCKKKKAAAAAAAAHHHS
BLINGIN UP IN DIS BEYATCH

[MrWillsauce]

I GOT DAT PLATINUM MUFUCKKKKAAAAAAAAHHHS
BLINGIN UP IN DIS BEYATCH

If gangsters played Dwarf Fortress...

[Necrisha]

I GOT DAT PLATINUM MUFUCKKKKAAAAAAAAHHHS
BLINGIN UP IN DIS BEYATCH

If gangsters played Dwarf Fortress...

No No they'd be "all about the adamantine".

Well on my volcano fort I've finally finished my magma workshops, including expansion channels pre-built and filled. and hey, no magma crabs on the map during filling, bonus. It just finished it's first winter, so time to see how quickly I can build my ambush killing chute.

[iceball3]

Well, we finally got traders. finally because we're lacking so much right now, except for food, stone and booze hehe.
Also this happened.

[MrWillsauce]

Well, we finally got traders. finally because we're lacking so much right now, except for food, stone and booze hehe.
Also this happened.
-snip-

Make him a legendary diagnostician. It is a must.

[Nonsequitorian]

Oh god my fort is of so much awesome right now it's hard to explain. A full map picture couldn't show everything, because it's on multiple floors.

To start out with, I had a normal hill map. Instead of carving the fortress in the hill, I carved the fortress OUT of the hill. by that I mean I took away all of the hill that wasn't part of the fort, leaving a huge castle with a giant water tank (because it's a BCB re-challenge, and I need a place for to "distill"). On the ground floor, I have a siege that I've nearly destroyed ONLY USING RETRACTING BRIDGES. Yeah. I have a couple draw bridges that just repeteadly appear and disappear, and the goblins fall down and climb back up, occasionally getting injuries.

For my archers to get a good shot, I took THE ENTIRE SECOND LEVEL and made it into fortifications. Now I see only a rain of bolts.

A hill titan out of sand arrived. Three shots, titan dies, now my squad leader is an elite crossbowdwarf.

Siege still going on when a Giant arrives (early world, tons of mega and semi mega beasts). Giant somehow makes it past my moat and a legendary wrestler punches him to death.

Siege still going on, nearly a year later. They only have archers left, which is the reason I haven't attacked them directly. I don't want to lose anybody (and so far I haven't)


I had had two big rooms full of water connected directly to my moat as my stills, but they weren't awesome enough. I drained them through my fortress carefully and then into the caverns, so I could build walls.

That took 20 lives. Still no tantrums

Siege still going on. They have literally one troll. One troll.

Remember that thread where I had a river that emptied faster than it filled? Yeah? Well that's where he was hiding, right where I had hoped he WOULDN'T. I dug out that area and he ran out, killed the miner who freed him, took the pick axe, and the proceeded to kill almost my entire squad of axedwarves. He became a fucking TROLL MINER because of how he used the pick.

My elite crossbow dwarf who killed the sand hill titan killed the troll miner deadededed.

[Loud Whispers]

Two of the last three W.C.'s in Silentthunders just got into a fist fight that resulted in bruises and broken bones. One's very unhappy, the other, miserable.

Looks like I'll have to change the mortality rate of science up to 83% if they don't cheer up :/

[Pyre]

Work on my super awesome dam of awesomeness has ground to a halt on account of badgers.

In other news, none of my useless crap trade goods are showing up on the move to depot screen. Any thoughts?

[yggiz]

He became a fucking TROLL MINER because of how he used the pick.

God, that is awesome.

In other news, none of my useless crap trade goods are showing up on the move to depot screen. Any thoughts?

Make sure your junk isn't forbidden, and not out on a bring to stockpile job.

[Loud Whispers]

Just two left now. What a shame. My Dwarves refuse to bury the body for some reason, any advice? It won't let me engrave a memorial either.

[iceball3]

Well, this happened.

When you see it, you'll shit bricks. Or dreams.