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[Staalo]

Whiterocks, 15th Felsite, year 17.

Little Sazir Dotshot has been a punching bag for a pair of giant zombies for over two weeks now.

He had somehow managed to sneak outside during a very careful hauling operation in a far corner of the map, and inevitably attracted unwanted attention from local roaming megabeast undead. I resigned to seeing him becoming another corpse among the dozens littering the non-reanimating areas around Whiterocks, but then something completely unexpected happened: He survived. And kept on surviving.

It looked like the attacks just glanced away or passed right through, unless a blow connected hard enough to send him flying several blocks away. Sometimes a limb would bend, but Sazir was still completely unharmed. Stunned, yes, and scared and exhausted, but it seems he is invulnerable to attacks from the Giant and Ettin zombies tormenting him. He does seem to get thirsty and hungry, though.

Of course I tried to find out what superpower could make him withstand the undead onslaught, but he seems to be quite normal child, except... he is negative one hundred eighty-two days old. His birth date is in the future, in Timber this year. Now there's something I have never seen in DF.

I have so many questions now. Was he always like that or did a zombie punch him so hard his birthday was propelled away by the force of the blow? Is he invulnerable because he doesn't actually exist yet? What happens when his birthday rolls around? Most importantly, how do I save him before he dies of thirst (if he does)?


EDIT: After nearly a month of pummelling, a lucky kick propelled Sazir away from the zombies and landed him right next to an entrance, allowing him to escape to safety. He is now well fed and boozed and is currently getting a new set of clothes to replace those torn to shreds during his rough handling. I'm curious to see what happens in 28th Timber when he's supposed to be "born."

[Staalo]

Hmmm... I might have found a possible reason why the giant humanoid zombies couldn't hurt Sazir.

His size is bit over 1200 cubic centimeters, which means he is about one-third the size of a newborn Dwarven baby. Which sort of perversely fits since it's still about five months until he's supposed to be born; he's practically an aborted fetus walking around in my fortress.

Just when I thought nothing in DF couldn't creep me out anymore...

[Derpy Dev]

I found out why you don't remove the attack requirements for titans, literally first year and a fire breathing sauropod ruined everything.

I'll just lower it down to semimegabeast level next time...

[Fleeting Frames]

@Staalo: haha. I'm afraid the birthday didn't sail off in an ark, though - immigrant abandoned worldgen children can just migrate really, really, really young. Shouldn't you be in your mother, young man?
She dropped me on the ground and forgot, sir.

Actually, wonder if such small creatures could dodge the slade ground and be unharmed?

Alligator men animalpeople would be more interesting for this experiment, given they start really small (35,25 cubic centimeters according to wiki) and start as children, not babies (thus able to learn from the experience), though they'll grow to dwarven size in about half a year normally. (And so much faster here, if your tests of early childhood training resulting in greater adult size hold true.)

[Staalo]

@Staalo: haha. I'm afraid the birthday didn't sail off in an ark, though - immigrant abandoned worldgen children can just migrate really, really, really young. Shouldn't you be in your mother, young man?
She dropped me on the ground and forgot, sir.

He's not even abandoned; he has both parents and an older sister living in the fortress. I thought it was just ordinary immigrant family braving the dangers to start a new life, but clearly something horrible happened on the way here.

I didn't even think about the training aspect! He already gained quite a nice set of skills during his month spent playing outside, but now I'm wondering... how buff could he get if I threw him back out?

[Derpy Dev]

@Staalo: haha. I'm afraid the birthday didn't sail off in an ark, though - immigrant abandoned worldgen children can just migrate really, really, really young. Shouldn't you be in your mother, young man?
She dropped me on the ground and forgot, sir.

He's not even abandoned; he has both parents and an older sister living in the fortress. I thought it was just ordinary immigrant family braving the dangers to start a new life, but clearly something horrible happened on the way here.

I didn't even think about the training aspect! He already gained quite a nice set of skills during his month spent playing outside, but now I'm wondering... how buff could he get if I threw him back out?

oh god staalo how about we not abandon children

[Fleeting Frames]

Technically, they're not children yet.

E: @Staalo: Well, tell us if the mother picks him up once he turns 0.

[TheFlame52]

I didn't even think about the training aspect! He already gained quite a nice set of skills during his month spent playing outside, but now I'm wondering... how buff could he get if I threw him back out?

Check out how high his stats are in Therapist. Either way you probably shouldn't throw him back out, since if he grows he might become vulnerable and die. All that potential, wasted!

[Staalo]

Can't get Dwarf Therapist to work on my setup, but I fished his physical attributes out with lua:

Strength 1311/2466
Agility 1291/1914
Toughness 1590/2424
Endurance 840/1374
Recuperation 729/1729
Disease resistance 278/1278

Unfortunately, Sazir isn't exactly Armok's blessed with those max values. I suppose there isn't much superdwarf potential in there even if I let him back out to play with his new friends.

you probably shouldn't throw him back out, since if he grows he might become vulnerable and die.

Only with things related to Dwarf Fortress one would even need a sentence like that! I think I'm going to have to sig that.

Shouldn't you be in your mother, young man?
She dropped me on the ground and forgot, sir.

And that.

[Fleeting Frames]

Hehe, thx. And no, he isn't, I guess. Going to go for slightly less dangerous training anyway, though?

[TheFlame52]

you probably shouldn't throw him back out, since if he grows he might become vulnerable and die.

Only with things related to Dwarf Fortress one would even need a sentence like that! I think I'm going to have to sig that.

1. Awesome
2. See, I could act all horrified like a regular person, or I could give a good argument as to why not to do it. One is pointless, the other is funny and has merit.

[Staalo]

Going to go for slightly less dangerous training anyway, though?

Possibly; the fort needs someone to pacify the surface. Traps and trick corridors will not catch all the undead, so someone needs to go out, take on Zombie Ettins and such, and win. Let's see whether he survives his birthday first.

[scourge728]

if we could learn how to manufacture this, we could create an army of unborn children to kill (or at least distract long enough for a military to kill) all the undead things

I guess unborn>undead

Also, the fact that dwarf fortress apperently tracks the size of unborn children astonishes me

[Staalo]

I guess unborn>undead

"You cannot kill what hasn't lived yet"

BTW, congratulations Sazir, for your... er... zeroth birthday! Yes, 28th Timber came and went, with nothing to mark the occasion except a passing remark "He was born today which makes him very young indeed" in his bio page. The game didn't implode upon realizing its mistake, Sazir didn't die or turn into a baby, nothing. Quite anticlimactic, to be honest.

He is now about the size of a newborn baby, just under 3500 cubic centimeters. It's a step up from a creepy fetus wandering around in adult dwarves' clothing, I guess.

[Fleeting Frames]

The latter of which makes me think that he survived zombie ettins due them being unable to find him in the clothes

Also, doesn't that slow him down? I recall heavier clothing garments can go up to 4 urists, which is over three times his weight as of your first check.