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Author Topic: The Infinite Heavens: More than one way to skin a cat.  (Read 327532 times)

piecewise

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The Infinite Heavens: More than one way to skin a cat.
« on: June 08, 2015, 10:44:09 pm »

The Infinite Heavens
A mind expanding journey of Enlightenment, Violence and Blasphemy across the uncharted realms of the afterlife

You died. At some point, somewhere. And now you're here. Here is a bit complicated; those nice compact heavens and hells of the meat realm have no bearing here. Some say that every god, hell, heaven, demon, and realm of deathly habitation dreamed of by man, beast, alien, or office furniture has ended up here; an endless plane of questionable morality and painful geography. Others say that this chaos is the corpse of god, rotting down into infinite, mindless creation. But most simply ignore these questions and live an undying life of repeated incarnations as they see fit; living, dying and returning elsewhere as something different.

You're recently incarnated yourself, maybe it's the first time and you've just died in the old meat realm of mortals or maybe its your 10,000th time and you're the spirit of a velociraptor. In any case, you've appeared in an upstairs single suite at the Motel 9 somewhere along the road in the 88,888,888th hell. It's a desert with tiny eyeballs instead of grains of sand, with a burning, eyeless baby vomiting flaming pitch onto the distant horizon instead of a sun. As far as hells go, it's not bad. The pay-per-view in the room is lousy though, nothing but X-rated nature shows.

At some point last night you wandered into the motel lobby and, amongst many many MANY beers, made a pact with 4 other motel patrons. A pact of the grandest significance imaginable. In this world of endless heavens, there must be a first. The First God and the First Heaven, the progenitor of all that has come after. And you, and your very drunk compatriots, have made a solemn vow to find this god and that heaven. Or become gods yourselves. Or find a nice heaven to settle down in. The details are a bit hazy, but it was very important and inspiring, and involved getting out of this hell, you're sure of that.  And you're pretty sure you remember peeing on a potted plant, but that's not important.

You woke up this morning, laying on the floor in the lobby. The Manager- an amiable giant praying mantis in a vest and bow-tie - is dead, slumped over the front desk with his head missing. Outside is his jeep, fueled and ready, red leather seats beckoning. Your companions are starting to stir and awaken. There is only one thing to do: make good on those drunken pronouncements of valor and poor planning!

Roadtrip!

Spoiler: What? (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Rules (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Making a character (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Joining (click to show/hide)

We also have a wiki (page) now: http://einsteinianroulette.wikia.com/wiki/The_Infinite_Heavens
« Last Edit: January 23, 2017, 12:04:56 am by piecewise »
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Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2015, 10:56:24 pm »

Name: Xankarvo the Grand

Soul: Xankarvo was (after an unfortunate spate as an unlucky fellow hoping to advance his powers of shapeshifting) a mighty wizard focused entirely on creating a universe after his own image. This dream ended after he accidentally spawned the Big Bang inside his brain.
Incarnation: A tall bald guy in voluminous robes of glaring purple and shining silver and deep black, with a track suit in those same colors underneath it.

What You're good at: Xankarvo enjoyed his pyromancy, but on occasion a wizard's just gotta do it by hand. He's extremely good at setting things on fire.

What you're bad at: Socializing/resolving things peacefully. Xankarvo could have charitably been called an arrogant fuck.

Your Hopes: Xankarvo wants power. He's not sure why  it's just a wizard thing. He wants to increase his abilities endlessly, to be without limit. To be omnipotent, perhaps. 

Your Fears: To be ineffectual, to be incompetent and useless, unable to use even great power granted  to him. He must be competent! (He's Xan that doesn't wanna act like Xan)

What you need to survive: Snacks and drinks. It's a limitation he despises and wishes he didn't have, but it's there.

What's in your pockets: He has a toothpick, an olive, and a really fancy pen.
« Last Edit: June 08, 2015, 11:48:19 pm by Xantalos »
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Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2015, 11:11:15 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 08, 2015, 11:25:32 pm by Kevak »
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Beirus

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #3 on: June 08, 2015, 11:15:12 pm »

Name: Tarmac the Gluttonous
Soul: Alejandro Trujillo, kingpin of the Miami underworld. He had in hand in a lot of illegal dealings from gun running to drug dealing to loitering and jaywalking. He died during a shootout with Miami PD. Not from being shot, from falling down the stairs on his way to the second floor of his house to get a better shot.
Incarnation: A rather odd plant with five-pointed leaves, formed in the shape of a man, with arms, hands, legs, and feet. His clothing is made of hemp and his head is a giant yellow smiley face, like a smiling Pac-Man. Scratch that, he's Pac-man with arms and legs. And hands and feet.
What You're good at: Using Needles, Blowing smoke rings
What you're bad at: Dealing with any form of authority, Putting together IKEA furniture (there's never enough screws or too many), Driving (it's why he had a guy for that)
Your Hopes: To find many scantily clad women of loose morals, along with many, many drugs.
Your Fears: To be left alone and destitute, without anything of his own. Or to be physically unable to act as an individual under his own will.
What you need to survive: Food and water. Or ghosts.
What's in your pockets: A lighter, a pack of cigarettes, a broken syringe
« Last Edit: June 09, 2015, 12:01:04 am by Beirus »
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IronyOwl

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #4 on: June 08, 2015, 11:18:51 pm »

Name: Golgon the Destroyer
Soul: Sally, the cutest stuffed bunny in the cutest widdle dress. She had many pleasant tea times with Mr Bill and Mrs Knock before the three of them were burned at the stake for probably being plagued.
Incarnation: A heavily muscled, bronzed giant of a man, stern of jaw and clear of purpose. The kind that's clearly just finished either fighting his way into a castle or ravishing some scantily clad maidens, and likely on his way to the other one.
What You're good at: Cheering People Up, Grappling, Singing
What you're bad at: Mechanical Repair
Your Hopes: To find worthy companions to drink and make merry with, in whatever form that takes. "Worthy companions" obviously not meaning these jackasses.
Your Fears: To be powerless and irrelevant, unworthy of notice due to repeated failure and blatant impotence.
What you need to survive: Food and water.
What's in your pockets: A tea set stuffed with bobby pins.
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A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

NAV

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #5 on: June 08, 2015, 11:26:16 pm »

Reservvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvve
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #6 on: June 08, 2015, 11:26:59 pm »

Character done~
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renegadelobster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2015, 11:35:13 pm »

Welp, this looks fun. Time to join! 

Name: Shawn McCrary

Soul: Just a grocery clerk. Didn't have much aspirations in life, actually liked his job. And helping people. And then died in a robbery gone wrong.

Incarnation: Kind of a...mismatched skeleton. One arm is shorter, ribs are all different sizes, jaw bone doesn't seem to fit quite right. He can speak, thankfully.

What he's good at: 1. Gets along with people/things/sentient beings rather well. Always liked working with/helping other people. 2. Rather good endurance. Liked to run on his days off, seems to of carried over to here as well.

What he's bad at: 1. Doesn't like confrontation, tends to cower, run away, or freeze up. Maybe that's why the robber shot him...

His hopes: People getting along, world peace, blah, blah, blah. A utopia pretty much.

His fears: Fucking eels man. They freak him out. War, constant fighting, stuff like that. Classic biblical hell would be his personal hell.

What he needs to survive: His high wear bits and pieces wear out, and need to be replaced. Legs, arms, parts that are being constantly used. Bones work the best, but wood can be used as a very temporary replacement. Oh, and some sort of lubricating agent for his joints. That seems to last much longer than one would suspect though.

What's in his pockets: He's got a backpack with a couple of spare bones, what looks like some rendered fat and some gloves.
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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #8 on: June 08, 2015, 11:36:17 pm »

I think you mean sapient. Not sentient.
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DoctorMcTaalik

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #9 on: June 08, 2015, 11:39:50 pm »

RESERVED
Spoiler: Charsheet (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 09, 2015, 01:43:13 am by DoctorMcTaalik »
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Beirus

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #10 on: June 08, 2015, 11:43:25 pm »

Character sheet is posted.
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Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #11 on: June 08, 2015, 11:48:54 pm »

Dun did it
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renegadelobster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #12 on: June 08, 2015, 11:49:21 pm »

Nah, I do mean sentient
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piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #13 on: June 09, 2015, 12:22:28 am »

Name: Xankarvo the Grand

Soul: Xankarvo was (after an unfortunate spate as an unlucky fellow hoping to advance his powers of shapeshifting) a mighty wizard focused entirely on creating a universe after his own image. This dream ended after he accidentally spawned the Big Bang inside his brain.
Incarnation: A tall bald guy in voluminous robes of glaring purple and shining silver and deep black, with a track suit in those same colors underneath it.

What You're good at: Xankarvo enjoyed his pyromancy, but on occasion a wizard's just gotta do it by hand. He's extremely good at setting things on fire.

What you're bad at: Socializing/resolving things peacefully. Xankarvo could have charitably been called an arrogant fuck.

Your Hopes: Xankarvo wants power. He's not sure why  it's just a wizard thing. He wants to increase his abilities endlessly, to be without limit. To be omnipotent, perhaps. 

Your Fears: To be ineffectual, to be incompetent and useless, unable to use even great power granted  to him. He must be competent! (He's Xan that doesn't wanna act like Xan)

What you need to survive: Snacks and drinks. It's a limitation he despises and wishes he didn't have, but it's there.

What's in your pockets: He has a toothpick, an olive, and a really fancy pen.
Looks fine. You awaken sprawled across one of the lobby's low quality, floral print sofas, covered in a thick blanket of travel brochures and dusted with nondairy creamer from the continental breakfast nook.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
You awaken behind the check in counter, covered in mantis goo and wildly hung over. The tile back here is slick and you find yourself sliding around like an idiot as you try to stand up. It doesn't help your mood.

Name: Tarmac the Gluttonous
Soul: Alejandro Trujillo, kingpin of the Miami underworld. He had in hand in a lot of illegal dealings from gun running to drug dealing to loitering and jaywalking. He died during a shootout with Miami PD. Not from being shot, from falling down the stairs on his way to the second floor of his house to get a better shot.
Incarnation: A rather odd plant with five-pointed leaves, formed in the shape of a man, with arms, hands, legs, and feet. His clothing is made of hemp and his head is a giant yellow smiley face, like a smiling Pac-Man. Scratch that, he's Pac-man with arms and legs. And hands and feet.
What You're good at: Using Needles, Blowing smoke rings
What you're bad at: Dealing with any form of authority, Putting together IKEA furniture (there's never enough screws or too many), Driving (it's why he had a guy for that)
Your Hopes: To find many scantily clad women of loose morals, along with many, many drugs.
Your Fears: To be left alone and destitute, without anything of his own. Or to be physically unable to act as an individual under his own will.
What you need to survive: Food and water. Or ghosts.
What's in your pockets: A lighter, a pack of cigarettes, a broken syringe
You awaken in the women's restroom, sprawled spread eagle next to crudely constructed doll of "pinky" the ghost, made up out of bed sheets, pillow cases, a tissue box, and what looks like some sort of melon or gourd. The entire thing is vaguely sticky.

Welp, this looks fun. Time to join! 

Name: Shawn McCrary

Soul: Just a grocery clerk. Didn't have much aspirations in life, actually liked his job. And helping people. And then died in a robbery gone wrong.

Incarnation: Kind of a...mismatched skeleton. One arm is shorter, ribs are all different sizes, jaw bone doesn't seem to fit quite right. He can speak, thankfully.

What he's good at: 1. Gets along with people/things/sentient beings rather well. Always liked working with/helping other people. 2. Rather good endurance. Liked to run on his days off, seems to of carried over to here as well.

What he's bad at: 1. Doesn't like confrontation, tends to cower, run away, or freeze up. Maybe that's why the robber shot him...

His hopes: People getting along, world peace, blah, blah, blah. A utopia pretty much.

His fears: Fucking eels man. They freak him out. War, constant fighting, stuff like that. Classic biblical hell would be his personal hell.

What he needs to survive: His high wear bits and pieces wear out, and need to be replaced. Legs, arms, parts that are being constantly used. Bones work the best, but wood can be used as a very temporary replacement. Oh, and some sort of lubricating agent for his joints. That seems to last much longer than one would suspect though.

What's in his pockets: He's got a backpack with a couple of spare bones, what looks like some rendered fat and some gloves.
You wake up on top of the check in counter and promptly scream and roll off as soon as you see the manager. You land flat on your back with a sound like a xylophone falling down a flight of stairs.

Name: Golgon the Destroyer
Soul: Sally, the cutest stuffed bunny in the cutest widdle dress. She had many pleasant tea times with Mr Bill and Mrs Knock before the three of them were burned at the stake for probably being plagued.
Incarnation: A heavily muscled, bronzed giant of a man, stern of jaw and clear of purpose. The kind that's clearly just finished either fighting his way into a castle or ravishing some scantily clad maidens, and likely on his way to the other one.
What You're good at: Cheering People Up, Grappling, Singing
What you're bad at: Mechanical Repair
Your Hopes: To find worthy companions to drink and make merry with, in whatever form that takes. "Worthy companions" obviously not meaning these jackasses.
Your Fears: To be powerless and irrelevant, unworthy of notice due to repeated failure and blatant impotence.
What you need to survive: Food and water.
What's in your pockets: A tea set stuffed with bobby pins.
Bronze man...ravishes castles...portcullis fetish...alright.

You kick your way out of  the broom closet with a "Caution: Wet floor" sign on your head and nothing else. You scream what you think is a knightly greeting but comes out more as a dry heave.

~Neri

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Re: The Infinite Heavens
« Reply #14 on: June 09, 2015, 12:25:32 am »

Groan loudly and attempt to clamber to my feet.
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