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What story do you guys want next?

Junic Tempedpractice (The first light mage)
- 2 (40%)
A Fortress Mode Playthrough
- 0 (0%)
Another Adventurer
- 0 (0%)
The Legendary wrestler elf queen
- 0 (0%)
The Ruined City (Called Benttaught)
- 3 (60%)

Total Members Voted: 5


Author Topic: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!  (Read 1682 times)

Untrustedlife

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Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« on: October 05, 2015, 06:30:52 pm »

I have a very cool world I have been playing for awhile, in adventure and dwarf mode, and I wish to tell you the story of a couple historical figures from that world:



Key:
The Blue is the Human civ

Green Is The Goblin

Yellow is the elves.

The Mentioned Ruined city is called Benttaught.
Contestfortune is the only tower in the lower left.

The Towers belong to one of two groups:
Light Mages
Vampire lords
(for some reason there are NO necromancers, and no other schools (I modded in 4 schools), which is intriuging because usually there is at least 2)
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World Information:
A world where the southern arctic is covered in perpetual fog, and only 3 civs are left, the Humans, The elves, and the Goblins (who surprisingly tend to leave everyone alone except the dwarves they killed off about 1000 years ago)
In this world war rages perpetually between the Humans and The Elves,
Also  in this world, the (modded) Chaos aligned Vampire Lords and Light aligned Light Magic school are constantly trying to balance each other out.
More Background:
In This world, which  I genned it to around year 1876, I had many adventurers and there were 3 civs left in the world, Goblins, Humans, and elves, and the elves and humans hated each other, there were many skirmishes, as people were sent to the elves to "cause trouble" but the tree cities greatest defender, the elf queen (also a legendary wrestler), dispatched these people effortlessly. (including 2 of my lesser adventurers) (who were on quests from the lord). You see, since the world had been around so long, the ONLY human city, which used to be the capital, was left to ruin around the year 1000, and by the time one of my adventures got there it  was ruled by not one, but 4 criminal organizations made up of mostly serphant men and women. It was a slum, where murder happened constantly, and most of the buildings were destroyed, and the castle was all but abandoned, the foul creatures must have bred in the sewers after the city fell to the elves.
The first Light Magic school “Contestfortunes” popped up in the blanketed southern arctic region known as the  “Blizzard Of Lands”, in the year 24. Founded by the greatest mage in the world “Junic TempedPractice” (I Nicknamed him “dumbledore” , from there the school of light magic spread, and eventually the entire region was filled with towers from this school. Also, hundreds of the books in the world were about this guy, and about his own books.
The Vampire lords, (which can spread their curse by biting) have the ability to summon evil aligned creatures, and the ability to summon dark harpies (which are basically gargoyles, and I will call then gargoyles/harpies interchangeably ) About 1/3rd of the towers in the world belong to these cursed individuals, and they occasionally skirmish with light mages.
The Light mages are winning this infinite battle of light versus darkness (though only a fool would call the “light mages” truly good, for they need bodies in order to summon their creations (and they summon unicorns, and unicorns are EVIL).


Story 1:

The Story OF Hagrid Crevicedwellers, aspiring mage.

One of my adventurers, an aspiring mage (I have modded in 4 magical schools and skyrim style vampire lords  (complete with the gargoyles) myself) Only one of the schools existed in this world by chance, and it was the Light summoning school (these individuals can summon satyrs,unicorns and gnomes and bunnies, and the occasional giant brown reculse spider) (via a hacky interaction). The first tower belonging to this school popped up in the lower left icy region called "The Blizzard OF Lands"  which, quite appropriately I might add,  is terminally blanketed in fog and snowstorms, (No joke, you can only see one square in front of you in this region all times of day for some reason (The game blames it on "thick fog")) Assuming this isnt some weirdness brought about by weather simulation. I roleplayed that this was BECAUSE this was where the first tower in the world popped up (I nicknamed the tower "Hogwarts" (but it is really called "Contestfortune" and it isnt referred to as hogwarts in my stories,  all other towers in the world belonged to mages who had been trained there and the occasional vampire lord and their harpy army. (There are NO necromancers in this world), (so it really was a kind of hogwarts). The head mage of the tower, "Junic Tempedpractice", was still alive and there were hundreds of books on the guy (he was a tragic character who used to be a ranger, and a lawgiver, really cool story ill tell about that some other time)). onto the story.
This adventurer was a peasant from one of the 4 or 5 human hamlets left in the world and his only wish in life was to become a mage. His name was Hagrid (I named him that).  After hearing about the school of light magic in the far southern left corner of the world and as quite the bookworm, he kept stumbling across books about the head mage of the tower, he asked for one of the soldiers in the keep of his village to guide him there. A long time friend who has known him since birth, This individual was named "Ciko Satinyglory" (he would later be turned into a brown recluse spider in a mysterious magical accident after Hagrid reached Contestfortune (Still not sure how that happened (hacky summoning interactions Probabbly)). His wish was to become  a legendary fighter, so of course he jumped at the opportunity to explore the world.  Neither of these two adventurers knew the perils that lie ahead of them.  However, the two set off anyway into the bright daylight and across the hills. On his way to the tower, Hagrid , who at the time had no idea that the “Great”  city he kept hearing stories about just south of his village had been abandoned for centuries, wanted to see this great thousand year old city for himself. So the two, on their way to Contestfortune to the protests of CIko  decided to stop there. However, things weren’t quite right when they arrived, the entire city was in ruin, and all they could hear were the tortured cries of the people trapped in the city killing each other. Only Armok knows what years of being trapped in that decrepit place would do to a person.  However, Hagrid, the curious and frankly stupid fellow he is, decided to go deeper into the city, before he could get far, he noticed the body of  a serpent man in front of one of the few buildings that wasn’t completely destroyed. Despite more protests from Ciko, Hargrid kept going deeper as curious as he was, he noticed an abandoned marketplace on the outskirts of the city, and he he decided to enter the building from which the body he found earlier looked to had fallen. The cries came nearer, and as he went deeper into the complex, he began encountering not only bodies, but severed limbs, lying all about the place. He kept going deeper, and discovered 3 people fighting each other with spears, It was at this point that Hagrid decided it was stupid of him to enter the city, and him and his compatriot ran out of the city in fear, what would you do in that situation?
After that little detour, Hagrid asked his guide how much farther Contestfortune was and his guide assured him that it was about two days travel to the south. Ciko looked very uneasy that day as the two marched closer to the school, and Hagrid had no idea why, he asked Ciko what was wrong, and Ciko mentioned that many “Shadow Trolls”  (The most successful variant of “Night Troll” that was spawned in this world by the random number gods) made their homes in the tundra around Contestfortune. Hagrid was un-perturbed by this, for he thought he could handle them. Oh How wrong he was.
The two kept going, and they set up camp in the middle of the night in the plains outside of the human civilizations territory on the edge of the tundra. The two were about to go to sleep In the middle of the night however before their heads hit the ground  the two were ambushed by a large and extremely angry Yeti. It was an intense battle, but eventually Hagrid due to his precision with the blade and Ciku due to his precision with a pike were able slew the beast after tackling it to the ground and chopping off its head. They didn’t even have any bruises to show for it.  The two then butchered the beast so that they could eat it for breakfast the next morning before falling asleep under the stars.
 The day ahead of them was going to be difficult and they knew that, for they had heard stories about the tundra they were about to enter, and its constant blanket of fog, and its constant blizzards , and the night creatures that constantly stalked it.
After a good nights sleep, the two had a great breakfast of yeti steak and yeti blood. They then packed up and headed into the tundra. As they entered the tundra, it was as if the world went black around them, almost immediately after entering it the two could only see about 1 foot in radius around them. It was here that Hagrid realized it would be harder to reach Contestfortune then he thought, for it was not revealed on his map, and he could only see so far ahead of them.  This was due, in part, he believed to the almost two thousand year old magic that wofted about the region around Contestfortune, which, the legends say weed out those not skilled or determined enough to learn the magic that caused it. Of course Hagrid believed he was capable, as do all aspiring mages. But he was untested, so could not be 100% sure.
OOC (Luckliy knowing this would happen, I gave him extra points into memory so he could remember the paths he took more easily (otherwise you will die in that region))
After the better half of a day wandering about this hazy black maze of a tundra, ciku mentioned to Hagrid that they should be there already, the ambitious pikeman  was clearly worried. And Hagrid became worried that CIku would abandon him. However, Ciku did not, and the two kept close as they marched towards Contestfortune as best they could given their lack of knowledge, for they only knew the direction of the tower, not how far away it was.
After another half of the day the two decided to set up camp to eat food and drink water, in the middle of the fog. Night was falling, but it was hard to tell due to the fog. So the two slept, in the middle of this thick black fog that night.  They were afraid to fall asleep due to fear that they would be ambushed by a family of shadow trolls, but eventually exhaustion overtook them.
The two woke up, and ate what was left of the yeti they had killed, they were now out of food, so if they didn’t find that tower today, they were surely doomed.
While wandering south west in the fog, the two were ambushed by a shadow troll, and began to fight for their lives,  The shadow troll quickly swiped hagrids weapon out of his hand, and he realized he was outmatched, the creature was huge and grey and had large tusks with which it could gore him, he deftly parried the tusks as best he could with his remaining weapon, a small knife. But he ended up being gored in the leg. He fell over and scrambled as fast as he could away from the troll, because hopefully the fog also hampered the trolls sight, and he had no idea where Ciku had gone in the fog after he crawled away from the troll. (in this region due to “thick fog” you can only see one square around you at all times of day (Im amazed toady programmed that in)) So he crawled west, for he knew the tower was to the west. Out of pure dumb luck. He felt a puce wall in front of him as he groped around trying to crawl away. He knew the tower ContestFortunes was made of puce.. so he knew he had found it, if only he could get to the door but the door was likely not on this side of the tower, a scream was heard by Hagrid, likely Ciku being killed (or as it turned out later he was turned into a recluse spider by one of the light mages), and the shadow troll found Hagrid, Hagrid scrambled for his life around the tower trying to find the door, while avoiding the troll and he found it.. he quickly fell into the door, the room was filled with gnomes and a satyr, who quickly ran out of the door and dispatched the shadow troll… Hagrid had found ContestFortunes… however, his trials were not over, for the mages gathered around him, and a satyr came out from the group and attacked Hagrid, despite his injuries Hagrid was able to kill the satyr, and he then , after finding the leader of the tower, learned the magic he so desired. He then retired in the tower, forever wondering what happened to his companion.

The End, If you want more stories, A friend recntly embarked in my world after these events so I will have many to come.

More Stories to come!
« Last Edit: October 06, 2015, 03:36:22 pm by Untrustedlife »
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Untrustedlife

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Added a poll, for future stories. Also do please give me  feedback.
and
Reserved.
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Untrustedlife

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2015, 10:04:33 pm »

Reserved again... so no more reservations.
Im doing more stories anyway even if people ignore me.
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Bearskie

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #3 on: October 07, 2015, 02:26:58 am »

Well, I always say this: Linebreaks and Pictures do everyone a world of good. ;) GL, need more Legends Mode stories around here.

Gwolfski

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #4 on: October 07, 2015, 01:29:09 pm »

Well, I always say this: Linebreaks and Pictures do everyone a world of good. ;) GL, need more Legends Mode stories around here.
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why kill elves if you could torture them, make them betray their friends, denounce their "force", make them watch trees being chopped down, feed them meat and throw them in magma as a sacrifice for almighty Armok?

Eventually when you go far enough the insane start becoming the sane

Untrustedlife

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #5 on: October 07, 2015, 05:16:52 pm »

Well, I always say this: Linebreaks and Pictures do everyone a world of good. ;) GL, need more Legends Mode stories around here.


I didnt take any screenshots, I didnt know it would turn out so awesome, you should read it some time.
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De

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #6 on: October 14, 2015, 05:35:42 pm »

All they meant was that the story as formatted is hard to read because it looks like a giant paragraph. You need to add in extra line blanks so the post doesn't hurt peoples's eyes. Other than that, it sounds like a really interesting mod. How come there are no necromancers?
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Untrustedlife

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Re: Stories from Xemramul "The Mythical Plane" FEEDBACK PLEASE!
« Reply #7 on: October 16, 2015, 12:17:21 am »

Hehe maybe I was a bit salty. There was only 1 human civ and they don't have any death sphere gods (as far as I can tell) to hand out the secrets of life and death and the dwarven civ died young so their gods didn't get a chance either (essentially I got really really lucky). But they did have a light sphere God so people turned to that and temple defiling to achieve immortality, I don't have the world on hand to check again either because I sent it to a friend so he could play a bit of dwarf mode (we are passing it back and fourth). (The lack of multiple secrets to learn about is also why there are such a huge amount of vampire lords and other night creatures)(normally you get a few "flavors" of necromancy)


I'll fix my post up s bit in the morning)

« Last Edit: October 16, 2015, 12:29:15 am by Untrustedlife »
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