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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 992040 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11025 on: December 07, 2020, 04:10:28 pm »

I wonder what the EU's parting words will be when the Brexit happens...
'So long, and thanks for all the fish'
"You cannot get off Mr. Bone's wild ride."

Then the brextension period begins, for a brexternity to breyond

Yeah, but those were all jewish people who didn't want to kill off poor people.
cut the homeless in half by 2025

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11026 on: December 10, 2020, 07:10:07 am »

The Volks-rant won the European Newspaper of the Year award for the second time in a row

https://newspaperaward.org/22-european-newspaper-award-list-of-winners/#toggle-id-5
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11027 on: December 10, 2020, 07:22:43 am »

German newspaper wins German newspaper award -- sensation of the year
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11028 on: December 10, 2020, 09:55:03 am »

In multiple cities in Albania riots have broken out, after police shot and killed a young man that ignored the corona night curfew.

The police called out the man for being out on the streets during curfew time, after which the man fled and ran away.  A police officer shot him in the back and he died.

Even though the police officer who fired the shot was immediatly arrested by his colleagues, the first riots broke out on wednesday in the capital city Tirana, and spread throughout the country today.

The rioters are setting fires near government buildings, and throwing stones at the police, who in turn respond with tear gas.  The protestors demand the government resigns, or at least the minister of internal affairs and the prime minister.

Multiple people have been injured during the riots, amongst whom 9 police officers

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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Grim Portent

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11029 on: December 10, 2020, 05:09:00 pm »

German newspaper wins German newspaper award -- sensation of the year

Volkskrant is Dutch not German as I recall.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11030 on: December 10, 2020, 05:23:23 pm »

IIRC Volksrant is the voice of the european people

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11031 on: December 10, 2020, 05:36:20 pm »

German newspaper wins German newspaper award -- sensation of the year

Volkskrant is Dutch not German as I recall.
Yes it is dutch but I think scriver knows that and was just messing with me hahaha
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11032 on: December 10, 2020, 08:46:19 pm »

German newspaper wins German newspaper award -- sensation of the year

Volkskrant is Dutch not German as I recall.
Yes it is dutch but I think scriver knows that and was just messing with me hahaha

I must admit I was trolling for a "Dutch totally == Germans" opportunity, I apologise martinuzz
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Iduno

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11033 on: December 11, 2020, 10:01:24 am »

German newspaper wins German newspaper award -- sensation of the year

Volkskrant is Dutch not German as I recall.
Yes it is dutch but I think scriver knows that and was just messing with me hahaha

I must admit I was trolling for a "Dutch totally == Germans" opportunity, I apologise martinuzz

Other way around. Germans are from Deutchland.
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scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11034 on: December 11, 2020, 10:05:49 am »

The joke is that Dutch and deutsch is the same word, Iduno.
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Iduno

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11035 on: December 11, 2020, 10:09:53 am »

The joke is that Dutch and deutsch is the same word, Iduno.

Yes.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11036 on: January 13, 2021, 08:28:28 am »

Wow, Podemos really manages to make progressive changes to Spain.

- People now have a right to a social minimum income if they cannot provide for themselves, ranging from 462 to 1015 euros per month depending on personal circumstances

- paternal leave.  Spain now ranks in the top 3 of global woman emanciption, together with Sweden and Iceland.  New fathers now have a right to 16 weeks of fully paid for (by the employer) paternal leave. This is exactly as much as women get.  With this, Spain hopes to end the discrimination of women on the job market. The argument 'women can get pregnant, then they cannot work for me for 16 weeks' is no longer valid.
(side note: compared to a lot of other EU countries, 16 weeks pregnancy leave for women is very short though)

- sex without explicit spoken permission from both parties can now be considered rape.  Before, if you raped someone but they were too afraid to say no, it was not rape.
If someone does not say 'yes'  explicitly, and penetration still occurs, it can be punished with up to 15 years in prison.

- euthanasia legalized for patients who are suffering hopelessly.

- honouring Franco, making fascist salutes now forbidden. Can get fined up to 150000 euros for it.
« Last Edit: January 13, 2021, 08:30:35 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11037 on: January 13, 2021, 08:39:33 am »

Suffering hopelessly?

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11038 on: January 13, 2021, 09:08:20 am »

Dunno, what is the correct english translation for ' uitzichtloos lijden'?

google said uitzichtloos = hopeless. I already had a ' don't feel quite right'  feeling but couldn't find the proper term in my memory.

uitzichtloos lijden = suffering with no possibility or hope for improvement
« Last Edit: January 13, 2021, 09:09:52 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Grim Portent

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11039 on: January 13, 2021, 09:15:33 am »

So terminally ill patients and/or patients with incurable long term health conditions?
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.
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