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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 990549 times)

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #885 on: March 02, 2016, 02:12:15 am »

Greece has filed a request for humanitarian aid with the EU. They want 300 million euros right now, another 200 million in 2017, and another in 2018, to cope with the refugees, and prevent the country from gliding into chaos and malaise.
If the EU approves, it would be the first time that the EU sends humanitarian aid to a member state.


In the past two months, 120 thousand migants have arrived in Greece. That is 30 times more than arrived in the same period last year, of which most are stuck in Greece, since it's neigboring states have closed their borders. Even more refugees are expected to come when spring arrives, and better weather makes crossing the mediterranean easier.

The Greekish prime minister Tsipras has threatened that if countries like Macedonia, Bulgaria, Slovania and Austria do not re-open their borders, from now on Greece will block any and every EU proposal.

http://www.volkskrant.nl/buitenland/griekenland-bezwijkt-onder-migranten-700-miljoen-euro-nodig~a4254982/

In b4 Greece invades neighbouring countries with tractors and bulldozers to get rid of the fences
« Last Edit: March 02, 2016, 02:14:31 am by martinuzz »
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #886 on: March 02, 2016, 02:42:02 am »

And then, somehow, this will be the EU's fault.
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Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

RedKing

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #887 on: March 02, 2016, 03:08:58 am »

So now we have to give Greece even more cash? Can't we just get Orban to go over there and teach them how to keep people out of their country?
Yeah, what were those lazy Greeks thinking by having 13,000 km of coastline and geographic proximity to most of the origin areas for refugees?

What do you want them to do, rediscover Greek fire and start lobbing it at migrant rafts?
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #888 on: March 02, 2016, 03:09:34 am »

Build a wall across the Aegean and get the Syrians to pay for it.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Teneb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #889 on: March 02, 2016, 08:37:43 am »

The greeks clearly should immigrate to Germany to further culturally enrich it.
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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #890 on: March 02, 2016, 09:17:03 am »

The greeks clearly should immigrate to Germany to further culturally enrich it.
Nah, all Orthodox Christians should migrate to Russia, Germany is a Muslim land
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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #891 on: March 02, 2016, 09:41:11 am »

So now we have to give Greece even more cash? Can't we just get Orban to go over there and teach them how to keep people out of their country?

Anyway, screw being blackmailed by the Greeks. If they're foolish enough to let half of NAME into their country, they can deal with the consequences, and we'll redirect our own efforts to our own borders.

The whole EU project is going to collapse in flames at this rate, and as far as I'm concerned the saddest thing about it is that Eurovision might diminish in quality somewhat.

So the EU is willing to pay Turkey a 4 billion ransom, but can't help a fellow state with the expenses forced on them by Merkel's open invitation?

If Greece could somehow block the refugees, the immigrants would have just found another way in.
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Dorsidwarf

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #892 on: March 02, 2016, 12:05:35 pm »

Maybe the eurozone would be less cagey about dumping a quarter-billion into Greece if they hadn't spent the last decade giving them over 2,000 times that amount with no appreciable effect.
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RedKing

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #893 on: March 02, 2016, 12:20:27 pm »

Maybe the eurozone would be less cagey about dumping a quarter-billion into Greece if they hadn't spent the last decade giving them over 2,000 times that amount with no appreciable effect.
That's a fair cop, but making Greece basically one giant refugee camp and then saying "you guys are bad with money, so fuck you" does not help the situation. Send EU humanitarian aid with EU oversight to make sure it's spent properly.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #894 on: March 02, 2016, 12:30:01 pm »

Considering that during the previous decade subsequent Greek goverments were being advised in regards to concealing the country's actual financial situation (as to meet the otherwise unreachable EU goals) by Goldman Sach, which at that point had Mario Draghi of later EU fame as one of the main executives.... well. It kind of reminds you of something

He denies knowing anything about what was taking place. Of course he does.

This people kind of people who want us to believe that they're both very smart and yet somehow utterly stupid at the same time have always amused me in some sad way.
« Last Edit: March 02, 2016, 12:31:52 pm by ChairmanPoo »
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #895 on: March 02, 2016, 12:33:13 pm »

Do you expect an executive at Goldman Sachs to know everything the bank is doing?
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Baffler

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #896 on: March 02, 2016, 12:50:57 pm »

Do you expect an executive at Goldman Sachs to know everything the bank is doing?

Probably not, but something with massive implications for international politics, not to mention the bank itself? I don't buy it. Something this important passing under his radar is either massive incompetence or deliberate ignorance.
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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #897 on: March 02, 2016, 01:18:34 pm »

So now we have to give Greece even more cash? Can't we just get Orban to go over there and teach them how to keep people out of their country?
Even with advisors they are actually too poor to do anything. So yes, if you want to stop this crisis at the European frontier. I remember having a conversation with an old dinosaur lefitst MP from Ireland, which was a very rare conversation I got to have, in which he said the EU would never let Greece leave as it was vital to their external border. But today that border is non-existent.

Anyway, screw being blackmailed by the Greeks. If they're foolish enough to let half of NAME into their country, they can deal with the consequences, and we'll redirect our own efforts to our own borders.
You must be aware that Greece's situation is highly volatile. Their country lives in the shadow of devastating civil war between leftist and rightists (the whole street wars between the communists and fascists still goes on today), they suddenly have lots of unemployed soldiers and foreign jihadis on their streets and millions of unemployed Greeks and foreigners trapped on their islands with neither wanting the other there. They are dealing with the consequences and the Greeks don't want them there, but they're kinda out of options and going the Orban route could empower their far-right faction and lead to civil war between globalist and nationalist Greeks.
Consider it has not been long since Golden Dawn were expelled from their parliament for calling their defence ministers traitors for not stopping the refugee crisis hitting Greece. The thing is is that irregardless of their economic situation forcing their compliance into German policy they are not capable of stopping this crisis on their own in any case. Earlier I talked of how India and China despite being so wealthy still need foreign aid because their tax base is too small and their wealth concentrated in the hands of the powerful, for Greece there is a similar situation only in this case it is to do with how hard it is to control Greece by virtue of its mountainous and decentralized country - it is very much like India, with lots of development being done on the inefficient municipal level. Greece has normally had one of the most formidable air forces and navies in Europe for quite some time and would have normally been able to stop this themselves, but their armed forces have usually always been funded for by some foreign power going as far back to the British Empire until today, when the Americans stopped funding them in Europe to refocus on Asia and an expanding China in the South China Sea.
Likewise the scale of human trafficking is quite sophisticated, I was bemused to hear from someone who knew some retired captains (the most reliable of sources, heh) why the Royal Navy (UK) withdrew from human trafficking patrols was that someone had given them their radio and they had their frequencies written down to call for assistance, quite reminiscent to how migrants would damage their own boats in the Indian Ocean and call for help from the Australians; it all ended up being an exercise in futility for everyone.

The whole EU project is going to collapse in flames at this rate, and as far as I'm concerned the saddest thing about it is that Eurovision might diminish in quality somewhat.
Eurovision is tainted in politics. Those bastards just couldn't dare to let Poland win so their pozzd judges dropped them like Danzig.

And then, somehow, this will be the EU's fault.
How is it not? Do you think millions of immigrants are drawn to a bankrupt country that offers no benefits? No, they're drawn to the borderless beacon of bountiful Berlin and bollockless Brussels. Booooo.

Yeah, what were those lazy Greeks thinking by having 13,000 km of coastline and geographic proximity to most of the origin areas for refugees?
What do you want them to do, rediscover Greek fire and start lobbing it at migrant rafts?
Most of their coastline is very precipitous and most of their country mountainous, with most of their affected lands being islands like Lesbos on the trail. Notably, islands. There is a reason why the Persian Empire twice could not simply walk into Greece. They could stop it at Greece if they had the funds, but they are Greece, so they do not. There's the political will for it too since their leftists are hard leftists and their rightists are hard rightists, it's just a matter of who funds them first, Brussels or Moscow?

So the EU is willing to pay Turkey a 4 billion ransom, but can't help a fellow state with the expenses forced on them by Merkel's open invitation?
To be fair the EU failed to deliver Erdogan the 4 billion to help pay for all the Syrian refugees he took in because as we've all established, this is not about helping people, otherwise the EU would have helped solve the problem locally (famine in Africa? earthquakes in India? drought in the ME? Let's solve that with immigration somehow). Merkel's open invitation has no end state, there is no getting off of Mr. Bones wild ride. Yo gonna get culturally enriched son, Grek is love, Grek is life.

If Greece could somehow block the refugees, the immigrants would have just found another way in.
If the EU did not exist then Portugal, Spain, France and Italy would have full border control. If Greece did block the immigration flow they would most likely have to either go through Romania, Iberia or Italy, this would at the very least cause more antagonism against the EU just as the Eurozone crisis did.

Do you expect an executive at Goldman Sachs to know everything the bank is doing?
Is this a joke?

Quote
European Central Bank Governing Council member Mario Draghi said he “knew nothing” about Greece using off-market swaps with Goldman Sachs Group Inc.
“I had nothing to do with this deal whatsoever,” Draghi told lawmakers in Brussels at his confirmation hearing for the ECB Presidency today. “The deals between the Greek government and Goldman Sachs had been undertaken before my joining of Goldman Sachs.”
Greece hid 5.3 billion euros ($7.7 billion) of debt using currency swaps, the biggest of which were with Goldman Sachs, Eurostat, the European Union’s statistics office, said Nov. 15. Greece entered into a number of arrangements from 2001 through 2007 and their use, which it hadn’t previously reported as debt, helped push up borrowings, leading to the nation needing a bailout last year and triggering Europe’s debt crisis.
Draghi, who worked at Goldman Sachs as a vice chairman from 2002 to 2005, said that “even though Goldman Sachs expected me to work with the public sector, I had no interest and taste to work with the public sector,” adding that “I knew nothing about these things, nor had I done anything later on about these things, you can ask anybody
So a former chairman of Goldman Sachs becomes a member of the European Central Bank and then claims ignorance to the profitable deals his companies made to make them rich and disguise Greece's collapse? What a coincidence! Just as I'm sure, it's pure coincidence that Monsanto sends their chairmen into the senate and commerce.

Pure coincidence, look away

RedKing

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #898 on: March 02, 2016, 10:12:28 pm »

Man, I had no idea the migrant crisis had gotten THIS bad.
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smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #899 on: March 02, 2016, 10:15:57 pm »

Lol, did they let autocorrect fix a spelling mistake or something?
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