Darx Is Best Boss, part 2“The warlady’s yellin’ ‘bout sometin, looks like some kid stole ‘er bedroom.”“When the hell did we get a warlady?”
“Dunno.”“Jus’ kick the kid out, if it’ll shut ‘er up. Oh and is dat were-troll back to normal yet?”
“Yeah, ‘e just quit screamin’.”“Pull ‘im out. I gots an idea…”
Rrruh? (Where are you taking me, dear sir? It is not safe for me to be among my compatriots so.)
Shut yer trap, troll. We’re almost dere.
Rrrruh! (I do say! That is an incredibly innapropriate place to be putting your hands! Perhaps a turnabout shall show you the error you have made!)
Sorry, were-elk. I’m married. slice
AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!( AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!)
What the hell kinda warcamp is dis anyway? Dere’s only 12 guys actually fightin’! If we wanna take the dwarves on we need ta get better than this.
So here’z what we’re gunna do- the three main squads are gonna train two at a time, with the third squad takin’ a break an doin’ other stuff.
Den dere’s gonna be a squad of anyone who knows how ta shoot, and deyre gonna train every three months. How’s it feel to be in charge of the God-Forsaken Shames, Quosdub?
And den I’m gonna be in charge of everyone else. Groups a’ four, each training one month a year so the food an’ booze keep comin!
Only ones gettin’ outta dat training are
Vuohig the manager and Bosa, tha broker.
HEAR DAT NIX? I’M IN CHARGE OF MORE PEOPLE DEN YOU!!!
”I want all the swords to stay here! Dey’re shiny and dey’re mine!”Yeah, Gozru, sure, whatever, we were definitely gonna get rid of our weapons in a bloody
warcamp, whatever were we gunna do without your brilliant leadership.
”Shut yer trap, Darx.”
Turns out, dere’s another cavern down dere. Dey musta missed it when dey dug dat well. Wouldnta mattered anyway, it’s dry as ‘ell.
I also found somfink
weird by one of the pools. I sent someone to go poke it an’ see what happened, but the dumbas let the pool wash it away instead.
Hey Bosa, come look at dis!
Dey
do grow back! You know what dis means? We(heh heh)- We got(haHAHA)- we got an ENDLESS SUPPLY OF--
Is yer head supposed to be spinnin like that, Bosa? And yer eyes are all white. Eh, he’s got silver, it’s probably fine.
More guys showed up. At least dey only brought one kid dis time. Maybe we can give ‘im that bracelet Bosa made, keep ‘im occupied.
Also a human with a spear came to get drunk and listen to my poems. I thought about havin’ everybody beat ‘er up, but the general’s human too and it mighta pissed ‘im off.
“Oy, Sanctume! Did you ever get Quox outta the well? I wanna see how smashed up his face is!”
“What?”
“Use yer other ear, asshat! I said, did you ever get Quox outta da well?”
“Nah. We almost got dere, but den there was magma in the way.”
“Anybody fall in?”
“Nah.”
“Dammit.”
“The new bedrooms done got built, boss.”
“Good. I was tired o’ trippin’ on goblins lyin’ in the dirt.”
“Yeah, but Utes fell off the roof.”
“Is his face all smashed up?”
“Nah, ‘e just got back up and csrried the extra logs to that storeroom you built.”
“Dammit.”
“Oh, and Ngezbo showed up again. Keeps complainin’ about bein’ dead and stuff.”
“Just carve ‘is name on a rock and chuck it in the corner. That’ll shut ‘im up.”
When I came here, I expected that life in a warcamp would be
excitin’. I’d get to bash some skulls in and watch people get hurt, good ol’ goblin fun. Might even be able to write a poem or two about it.
But the most exciting thing that’s happened since Quox fell down the well is the honey badger that showed up, an’ I didn’t even get to kill it!
Wait a minute- yer kiddin’ me. Yer kiddin’ me!
You caught a fuggin Giant Cave spider?
That gives me some ideas. It’s bout ta get
interestin’ in Thunderdoom.
That was the remainder of summer (about a week) and autumn there. Quasar, do you want me to stop at Spring, go through to Autumn again, or do the full year and a half? Oh, and can Goblins work Adamantine? Cuz we have a source for it now.
Gobbed people:
He has a pet Giant Bat and is a Novice Animal Trainer.
She is married with 5 kids, none of which are at the fort. She is both an axedwarf and a butcher, and has 1 kill, a goblin.
His wife is at the fort, but his 2 kids aren't, and he has 3 goblin kills.
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4 (15.4%)
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Topic: Thunderdoom - A Succession Goblin Camp [42.05] (Read 39173 times)