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[blazing glory]

You're all working in your cubicles in a dull skyscraper for the Generic'o Corporation when suddenly you see the elevator doors blowing outwards and black-suited men sweep through firing bullets through the flimsy cubicle walls!

It's obviously the CIA! They're here to take you down for reasons only you know, and they're serious!

But! This isn't just any cubicle farm! Everyone here is a certified action hero with the power of highly unreliable luck! Just now, you see someone pick up one of the doors for use as a shield in an amazing feat of strength and then let out a feeble croak and be crushed under it.

Obviously you'll do better then that!

...Right?

I'm bored.

Something quick, something stupid, something simple, standard rules, GM gets to do whatever he feels like with your action if he thinks it's too stupid, etc etc.


You're all currently on floor 37 out of 50 on the blandest skyscraper in existence, surrounded by cubicle walls that do little besides obstruct vision, at the walls there are frequently occurring windows at the far walls, many CIA agents are moving out of a door-less elevator, a seemingly infinite amount of people seem to be doing random things and hilariously failing, you hear a helicopter somewhere.

Something needs to go on the coroner's report, what would you say your name was if your girlfriend and mother were watching?

And then, actshun!

[blazing glory]

The Morgue

Still twitching:

Yoink/John Moxley:Sitting on floor 36 below his ruins.

MidnightJaguar/Curtis Langer:Making crappy rubberband mechanisms and playing with knives.

KiwiOui/Jack Gill:Fleeing underground.

chokepoint/Cho K. Point:Right arm shredded by machine guns+nose-bleed.

TheBiggerFish/Fred Jones:BREAKING MAH LAZOR

Coolrune206/Stanley:Forcibly removing dangerous equipment.

crazyabe/Robbert Gilligon MacKillem.

Almost definitely dead.

lawastooshort/Kobosh Jackson:Tripped and took 9 rounds into heart and lungs.

Coolrune206/James Daniels:Currently a cannibal-friendly variant on Swiss Cheese, look into marketing.

Coolrune206/Darrin:Paste on the sidewalk, perhaps can be used as a sauce for the Cheese.

Coolrune206/Alyss Marinworth: More paste for the paste god.

[lawastooshort]

My name is Kobosh Jackson

[blazing glory]

I did mean put down a name and then an action, sorreh.

[lawastooshort]

I wondered.

Grab a gun from the nearest agent, and use it to shoot him in the knees.

[Coolrune206]

James Daniels!

Stop playing mine-sweeper, pick up my computer, and fling it at the nearest agent.

"I WAS JUST ABOUT TO BEAT THE HARDEST DIFFICULTY"

[lawastooshort]

"No you weren't!" shouts Kobosh from a couple of cubicles away. "I was!"

[Coolrune206]

"WE BOTH WERE. LET'S WORK TOGETHER TO SURVIVE, THEN PLAY COMPETITIVE MINESWEEPER AFTER. THAT'S A THING, RIGHT?"

[lawastooshort]

”I only ever play minesweeper HARD, dude. So yes. Let’s. We have time to slay these mysterious agents and beat minesweeper too!”

[Yoink]

My name's John Moxley, I just got to work and I damn well intend to finish my first coffee of the day before dealing with this bullshit.    

[blazing glory]

I wondered.

Grab a gun from the nearest agent, and use it to shoot him in the knees.

(1) To start things off, you lurch from your desk towards one of the agents with your arms outstretched and trip over on the corner of the cubicle, he then empties the entire magazine into your various vital organs.

Alas, you'll have to play competitive Minesweeper in the afterlife.

Dead.

James Daniels!

Stop playing mine-sweeper, pick up my computer, and fling it at the nearest agent.

"I WAS JUST ABOUT TO BEAT THE HARDEST DIFFICULTY"

(1) Following Kobosh's example on how to roll a die, you heave and pull on your computer which doesn't seem to be yielding from its cords, and take several bullets into your shoulder.

It rather hurts and it doesn't seem to work.

My name's John Moxley, I just got to work and I damn well intend to finish my first coffee of the day before dealing with this bullshit.    

(5) It turns out walking with your coffee-deprived zombie-like gait actually makes you a rather difficult target, you shamble through the hailfire of bullets and reach the coffee machine where you prepare your cup of Joe to face the day, it doesn't take too long and you take a gulp to be revitalized.

This is quite honestly the best coffee you have ever had the divine fortune of drinking, you feel time slowing down while your brain kicks into gear and energy fills your limbs, you're definitely ready to take this day on.

2+ on next turn, 1+ on the following 2 turns.

[Coolrune206]

Take cover in my cubicle. Wait for someone to enter, then ram them with my injured shoulder, and loot them for any tier 2 loot I can.

[MidnightJaguar]

Curtis Langer
Gaahh not right now! I was just about to finish shredding some important files too.
Take a lighter, set the shredded paper on fire and throw the now on fire shredder into an agent.

[crazyabe]

My name is Robbert Gilligon MacKillem, And those CIA Losers Just Stopped me from being able to Slack off, Now They will feel the Wrath of an Angry Scot as I beat some of them with an Oversized Stapler!

[KiwiOui]

I am Jack Gill, full time desk-monkey, part time dishwasher, and avid reader.
Throw a paperweight into the kneecap of an agent.