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[wierd]

Finally, something on topic.


The issue is not the "It's getting weird".  The "Its getting weird" is a symptom, specifically of a relationship situation forming (because that is what your brain wants to do by default), despite the overtly stated desire for one not to be.

The repatterning happens after repeatedly having it get weird, breaking things off, cutting off all contact, and trying to do it again. (and again.) (and again.)


It's a bit like people that learn not to trust people, after being hurt emotionally repeatedly.  It is a self induced deficit in the mechanism involved, due to the brain learning a behavior.

Unlearning something is something like 40 times harder than learning something.

https://www.edweek.org/ew/articles/2019/05/15/whats-harder-than-learning-unlearning.html


To avoid that, I advocate away from the "Casual sex" ONS ideology, and toward "consistent sexual partnership".

[The Ensorceler]

You've repeatedly claimed that not following you instructions will scar people for life, and make them unsuitable parents. The alternative is that following your instructions will preserve people as ideal parents in a lasting relationship. Perfect is paraphrasing, but you've been denigrating the flipside all day as basically junkies willing to brain damage themself for sex. It grates a bit, okay?

I just had a breakup and I've been specifically wishing I could pair bond less strongly than the clingy shit that went down. It felt awful. I'd rather be able to be close with people without it hurting so bad to be alone for a day. If I could snap my fingers and crank it down, I absolutely would. I dont want to have any children myself, but I dont think I'll ever lose my ability to be good family or help with someone else's kids. It has nothing to do with sex if you let go of the nuclear family ideal.

[wierd]

You've repeatedly claimed that not following you instructions will scar people for life, and make them unsuitable parents.

Where?-- Citation, or Stfu. I am done with this "I perceived this is what you said even though you can prove it is not what you said, but I am gonna continue like it is what actually happened" nonsense.  Either give a quote, or apologize. Its either that, or the ignore button. Quotation. Get one.

The alternative is that following your instructions will preserve people as ideal parents in a lasting relationship.

WRONG.

Parenthood is never asserted. It is "healthy 2 person relationship with pairbond."  Unless you somehow think gay people can get pregnant from each other. In which case, do elaborate-- because I have a VEEERY early quotation about gay people and such pairbonding I can ram down your throat.

Perfect is paraphrasing, but you've been denigrating the flipside all day as basically junkies willing to brain damage themself for sex. It grates a bit, okay?

and you have been arguing at shadows the whole time, so I guess we are even.

I just had a breakup and I've been specifically wishing I could pair bond less strongly than the clingy shit that went down. It felt awful. I'd rather be able to be close with people without it hurting so bad to be alone for a day. If I could snap my fingers and crank it down, I absolutely would. I dont want to have any children myself, but I dont think I'll ever lose my ability to be good family or help with someone else's kids. It has nothing to do with sex if you let go of the nuclear family ideal.

I am sorry for your loss, but that does not excuse your behavior here.

[nenjin]

Don't we have a human sexuality thread around here somewhere? (Maybe it got locked over gender identity debates or w/e.)

Anyways, maybe start a thread for all this.

[wierd]

I would rather not. I am not a masochist, and am "Beyond tired of this shit."

[wierd]

Except it is not a myth, when real people are looking for it.

https://twitter.com/wannasworld/status/1179580254979022849?lang=en

http://www.lifestyles.com/article/study-looks-into-the-matter-of-women-and-casual-sex/

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/02/ce-corner

https://www.newyorker.com/science/maria-konnikova/casual-sex-everyone-is-doing-it

[wierd]

You know..

I would like to apologize for losing my cool.  I can only handle being character assasinated, then having what I say blatantly ignored in favor of scarecrow_DeJoure so many times before I lose it.  If I did not miscount, this happened at least 4 times, with different people.  Each time, it was "But it LOOKS like this thing! (that is irrational and bad!)" which then morphed magically into "IT IS THAT THING!!", rather than people going "Hey, this challenges my worldview. Oh, I see other people made a comment-- Oh, he refuted it with data, OK. I don't need to go be belligerent."

My patience is not everlasting, and I got mad eventually.  I am sorry.  Just... Intellectual dishonesty like that, really torques my bolts.  If you have a problem with a position I have taken, attack the position, not *ME*, please.  Use data, and sources. Not "But muh feels!"-- You will often find that I do not readily base opinions that affect other people on my internal opinion, and seek outside, verifiable sources of guidance for that policy.  So, go there.

Please.

Again, I am sorry for the disruption. Just... Yeesh.

[nenjin]

Yeah can we please get back to horrible news about our country? You know, the good ol' times.

[Naturegirl1999]

Country wide Coronavirus infections increased by 50% in June

[nenjin]

Country wide Coronavirus infections increased by 50% in June

That's more like it.

[wierd]

Yup Yup.

Sadly, it is EXACTLY what the WHO said would happen, what Faucci said would happen, what every reputable epidemiologist said would happen, and what the vast majority of the US population wanted to avoid.

But, "OMG! THE ECONOMY!! REOPEN NAOOOWW!!", along with the patently fucking obvious #ReOpen twitter campaign astroturfing. (Trump was planning this absurd reopen timeline *BEFORE* the so called protests! You can see it in the damn news article timelines!!)


So, when thousands more people fucking die from this shit, be sure to level that finger appropriately at the greedy motherfuckers that pushed for this.

[TamerVirus]

This perfectly predictable and totally avoidable scenario could have been avoided

[wierd]

Exactly.

Oh look-- EVEN FUCKING FORBES reported on #ReOpen being fucking astroturfing.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/simonchandler/2020/04/24/security-researchers-say-the-reopen-america-campaign-is-being-astroturfed/#498246f96506

IN APRIL!

NYTimes also has a very nice story that actually follows the money (which Forbes somehow (ahem) failed to do.)
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/22/opinion/coronavirus-protests-astroturf.html

[McTraveller]

Any form of government action associated with stopping the spread of the virus boils down to forcible incarceration, because if the population isn't willing to practice social distancing this is the only option.  I personally don't think that a human rights violation is a reasonable price to pay to limit a virus, no matter how deadly.

For good or ill, (I personally think good, but mileage may vary), the US government is not willing to use force to keep people locked up, even for "the good of everyone."  I'm happy to personally practice social distancing, but I would not be happy if I had armed guards making sure I didn't leave my house.  Of course I work a tech job and can work from home so it didn't really impact me that much.

But either way you can't lay this only at the feet of the government - you have to lay it on every single person who goes about their business without a mask, simple handwashing, or staying at home when they feel ill.  Because I guarantee that the US culture is such that even if you had financial backstops in place and just paid everyone their full salary to stay home and do nothing, enough people would still wander around to make containment difficult.

[wierd]

Good thing then that most americans join your sentiment--

Several opinion polls were conducted nationally, and only a VANISHINGLY small demographic actually wanted to reopen early.

Instead, reopening early and sending conflicting messages about mask use, social distancing recommendations, and propelling refusal to comply with these voluntary measures as an identity politics piece, has engineered a situation where thousands of people will now FUCKING DIE.

Doing that kind of thing so that you (impersonal, rich people in general-- not aimed at anyone here) and your buddies can get your investments tidied up to ride this out by initiating a stock rally to cover your short sells, is fucking heinous as goddamn hell.

{as for personal impact though, I work in healthcare, caring for a supremely "At risk" demographic.  I have been living like I make half my pay, and been eating literal fucking yard weeds, to avoid going to the store, to avoid any potential interaction where I might expose my residents. I am fucking committed to doing everything in my power to prevent that, and to assure that if it DOES fucking happen, it WONT be because of me. I am a tech nerd-- I HATE going outside and working in the yard-- but every damn day after work, I have been digging up the hard-as-hell ground outside to put in a garden, SO I WONT HAVE TO GO TO THE STORE.  This pandemic is not something to just relegate into some damn identity politics bullshit shitstorm.  It's something to wake the hell up to, and take very damn seriously.}