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Author Topic: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon  (Read 4720 times)

Nirur Torir

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Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« on: February 08, 2017, 04:50:03 pm »

The Earth's top scientists have sighted an alien invasion force on the edges of the Solar System, and they will be here in exactly three turns!

In response, the UN has contracted the League of Maniacally Sane Scientists. In exchange for promising to 'look the other way' regarding future ethics complaints, the LoMSS have agreed to defend the planet.

Now get started! Hurry! You only have the entirety of Earth's GDP and three turns to save us all!
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OceanSoul

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2017, 05:02:41 pm »

My actions will be in bold.

Easy. We just don't do anything, and not say we do anything, either. Since our turns last until we make our actions, if we never take actions, the aliens will never get any turns, and their invasion will constantly be 3 turns away forever.
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Work on a potential forum game for my return to Bay12. Figure out parts that puzzled me before. Find more things to figure out that I can't. Work on another game instead of solving them. Get distracted and stop working. Remember it a week or two later. Remember I'm still on hiatus. Illogically, Be too ashamed to return yet. Repeat ad nauseam.

Finally have a game completely ready. Wait a week before posting it out of laziness.

Nirur Torir

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2017, 05:22:41 pm »

The Jeffries-VII Timesplit Detector starts beeping and prints out a brief report.

Quote
TIMELINE #<TRANSLATION ERROR 49>
AND SO THE LEAGUE OF MANIACALLY SANE SCIENTISTS SACRIFICED THEMSELVES, DOING PRACTICALLY NOTHING FOR MANY CENTURIES OF UNAGING BOREDOM, FORCING THE ALIEN INVADERS TO REMAIN STILL. THEY GRADUALLY ACTED, OF COURSE, AND SO THE ALIENS EVENTUALLY MET WITH A FULLY QUALIFIED EARTH DEFENSE FORCE.

THE LEAGUE OF MANIACALLY SANE SCIENTISTS WERE THEN PRETTY MUCH USURPED BY SUPERIOR TECHNOLOGIES, ENDING UP AS A MERE HISTORICAL FOOTNOTE.
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Coolrune206

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2017, 05:30:10 pm »

Chief Mechanical Scientist Gunder:

"You should all verk on de gun itself. I vill verk on the power supply. If there is one thing ve Norvegians are good at, it is making overly complicated displays of power."

Construct a massive geothermal piping network under Norway, dedicated to powering the EDC.

If the aliens are on the edge of the solar system, and the 3 turns are the same amount of time, then we should have several years for each turn. After all, space travel at speeds even close to that of light are impossible. Thus, it will take them forever. If the aliens move quickly regardless of science, I will lecture their leader on Physics.
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"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

OceanSoul

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2017, 05:50:41 pm »

Head Wall Demolitionist and Jack-of-all-sciences, Magen Etonn

Of course. There's always ONE guy that can't do nothin' successfully. No turning back now. Please, don't decide to build anything yet. We can talk about what we could/should/would do as a free action. On the bright side, I DO like your idea of partitioning work. I, personally, propose an energy-beam cannon that creates and transfers vibration to the alien ships. There's several things we can do from there: One, the vibrations can occur on the right frequency to rip major parts of their ships apart; Two, same as one, but the frequency rips the aliens themselves apart; Three, the vibrations transfer a virus or other disease to their ships, possibly directly into the aliens, since their foreign biology has no natural resistances to Earth-1's diseases...probably; Four, all the previous three at once; Five, same as four, period.
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Work on a potential forum game for my return to Bay12. Figure out parts that puzzled me before. Find more things to figure out that I can't. Work on another game instead of solving them. Get distracted and stop working. Remember it a week or two later. Remember I'm still on hiatus. Illogically, Be too ashamed to return yet. Repeat ad nauseam.

Finally have a game completely ready. Wait a week before posting it out of laziness.

Coolrune206

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2017, 06:05:53 pm »

"Vibrations in space delivering diseases? Zat is preposterous! Did you not take ze Biology?

Nay, I propose, I propose a railgun! Accelerate a particle, annihilate their spaceship!"
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OceanSoul

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2017, 06:16:29 pm »

...What if we accelerated their ships..through TIME? Their moments would lengthen, and the millisecond gaps in their defense last HOURS, for our weapons to take full advantage of?
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Work on a potential forum game for my return to Bay12. Figure out parts that puzzled me before. Find more things to figure out that I can't. Work on another game instead of solving them. Get distracted and stop working. Remember it a week or two later. Remember I'm still on hiatus. Illogically, Be too ashamed to return yet. Repeat ad nauseam.

Finally have a game completely ready. Wait a week before posting it out of laziness.

ziizo

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2017, 07:43:58 pm »

start making the targeting system of the cannon the power of it doesn't matter if it cannot aim
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GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.

Rethi-Eli

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2017, 10:02:29 pm »

"A großer cannon, ja? Das ist ein schlecht idea! Nein, ve must create many veapons! Die superior engineering of mutter Deutschland shall eliminate ze invaders!

Create a fleet of small drones, each armed with a small rocket and a machine gun! We will overpower the enemy by virtue of sheer numbers!
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In the end, the winner is the one with the most snake venom.

OceanSoul

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #9 on: February 09, 2017, 10:20:28 pm »

But they're in space. Drones won't fly in space. At least, not USUAL drones..
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Work on a potential forum game for my return to Bay12. Figure out parts that puzzled me before. Find more things to figure out that I can't. Work on another game instead of solving them. Get distracted and stop working. Remember it a week or two later. Remember I'm still on hiatus. Illogically, Be too ashamed to return yet. Repeat ad nauseam.

Finally have a game completely ready. Wait a week before posting it out of laziness.

Coolrune206

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2017, 10:34:49 pm »

"A großer cannon, ja? Das ist ein schlecht idea! Nein, ve must create many veapons! Die superior engineering of mutter Deutschland shall eliminate ze invaders!

Create a fleet of small drones, each armed with a small rocket and a machine gun! We will overpower the enemy by virtue of sheer numbers!

((History check- Russia said Mother Russia. Germany said the Fatherland, or "das Vaterland"))

"A machine gun? Vhat? How do you propose we make a space machine gun? It would not propel unless ve vork out a new firing mechanism. Railguns are ze vay to go in a vacuum."

((Drones in space would work. It'd be a matter of getting them into space. Once there, RCS thrust would be enough to get them around.))
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"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

Rethi-Eli

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #11 on: February 09, 2017, 11:05:28 pm »

"A großer cannon, ja? Das ist ein schlecht idea! Nein, ve must create many veapons! Die superior engineering of mutter Deutschland shall eliminate ze invaders!

Create a fleet of small drones, each armed with a small rocket and a machine gun! We will overpower the enemy by virtue of sheer numbers!

((History check- Russia said Mother Russia. Germany said the Fatherland, or "das Vaterland"))

"A machine gun? Vhat? How do you propose we make a space machine gun? It would not propel unless ve vork out a new firing mechanism. Railguns are ze vay to go in a vacuum."

((Drones in space would work. It'd be a matter of getting them into space. Once there, RCS thrust would be enough to get them around.))

Well... Err... Alternate timeline! Yeah, that's logical.

"Nein, mein freund, ze drones are for when ze imvaders enter ze atmosphere! Your useless kanone vill not hold zem all off! ...

Scheiße, ich bin a terrible impression of a Deutschlander. Ve really need more wissenschaftleren"
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In the end, the winner is the one with the most snake venom.

killerhellhound

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #12 on: February 10, 2017, 01:14:42 am »

Looking at the arguing 'sane' genius's "Damn buggers dont know how to work together"

"Oh hell might as well just get to work"

Get to work building the body of the Railgun for now focusing on making it able to interface with the geothermal power being created
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Fluttershy jumps onto TCM, giving him a hug. "~Yay~"*Player TCM has left the server. Reason: HHHHNNNNNGGGG-

We Madmen are very ingenious.  Sometimes it just takes just a little less sanity to pull off something completely awesome.

OceanSoul

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #13 on: February 10, 2017, 08:40:43 am »

Spend my time aiding the pursuits of the other scientists, making their parts of the cannon more effective and efficient.
If you thing about it, a railgun can only attack one ship at a time. If we added some explosive component to the ammunition, we could make the ships become damaging shrapnel against each other. Speaking of, what will we use as ammunition, anyway?
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Work on a potential forum game for my return to Bay12. Figure out parts that puzzled me before. Find more things to figure out that I can't. Work on another game instead of solving them. Get distracted and stop working. Remember it a week or two later. Remember I'm still on hiatus. Illogically, Be too ashamed to return yet. Repeat ad nauseam.

Finally have a game completely ready. Wait a week before posting it out of laziness.

Rethi-Eli

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Re: Roll to Build an Earth Defense Cannon
« Reply #14 on: February 10, 2017, 11:20:42 am »

Spend my time aiding the pursuits of the other scientists, making their parts of the cannon more effective and efficient.
If you thing about it, a railgun can only attack one ship at a time. If we added some explosive component to the ammunition, we could make the ships become damaging shrapnel against each other. Speaking of, what will we use as ammunition, anyway?

"Exactlisch! Ve cannot use einen big kanone, das ist stupid! Ve need drones!
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In the end, the winner is the one with the most snake venom.
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