Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

Milk

16 (45.7%)

Cookies

19 (54.3%)

Total Members Voted: 35

[CABL]

Name: Roboute Guilliman
Description: Honestly just look him http://
Why do you want milk? To help me heal. I just woke up from stasis.

Spawn outside. To big to fit inside.
Stop the Chaos Legion guy from going anywhere. By force if necessary.

Your Mary Sue powers are useless without Matt Ward as GM...

Note: I'm not actually Warhammer 40K fan, I only played DoW: Dark Crusade.

[johiah]

Name: Roboute Guilliman
Description: Honestly just look him http://
Why do you want milk? To help me heal. I just woke up from stasis.

Spawn outside. To big to fit inside.
Stop the Chaos Legion guy from going anywhere. By force if necessary.

Your Mary Sue powers are useless without Matt Ward as GM...

Note: I'm not actually Warhammer 40K fan, I only played DoW: Dark Crusade.

Well technically this is just an apparition of him, it is solid, but most of his Mary Sue powers are spent on staying corporeal. His real body didn't travel here.

[Enemy post]

If you put me on the waitlist, then PM me when I shall post.

There won't be a waitlist, you'll be able to play. Also, Johiah, your image link is broken.

[OceanSoul]

Cook a bovine biscuit and feed it to a random other person other than the Shadow, turning them into a cow!

[johiah]

If you put me on the waitlist, then PM me when I shall post.

There won't be a waitlist, you'll be able to play. Also, Johiah, your image link is broken.

Fixed it, except I don't know how to make the hyperlink a word. I wanted to tie the link to the word up.

[Enemy post]

You can copy this for your description.

Description: Honestly just look him up.

[Glass]

Try to posses the sink, and make it spew milk.

[Enemy post]

TURN 2

(I used a d20 to determine turn order, since it mattered this time.)

Yell triumphantly at my successful conjuration of milk. Loudly. Like, loud enough to kill.

3

You are very pleased at your success. You yell triumphantly, and the remaining windows shatter. You can't quite manage a lethal volume, but your earsplitting shriek knocks you over.
4 vs 1
The refrigerator is also broken, and the momentarily disrupted Shadow slinks from the wreckage. No others are close enough to be truly harmed.

ENTER HOUSE, OBSERVE SITUATION
HEAD TO MY ROOM AND LOCK THE DOOR

CHECK ON SECRET STASH OF POWDERED MILK UNDER BED

1

You approach your home after a brisk morning stroll. You notice the windows being blasted out by a high pitched shriek. Ziizo stands on the driveway amid broken glass. You step in to see the living room in chaos. You know what this must mean. You head to your room and lock the door. As you check your stash, you confirm that the worst has happened. You're out of milk. To make matters worse, the lock on your door is now jammed shut with you inside.

Spoiler: Forces of Chaos... Bow to me. (click to show/hide)

Name: Lord Eliphas the Inheritor
Description: Chaos Lord of Word Bearers Traitors Legion.
Why do you want milk?: Chaos as a whole would benefit from having milk.

Go to the streets and find the nearest Chaos cult.
Demand them to work for me, if it doesn't work, slice them all with my power sword.
If successful, give them orders to open Warp Portal.
Summon 10 Chaos Space Marines from the Portal.
Attack and loot the store.

(I haven't played any 40k games, but I'll do my best.)

1

You are Eliphas the Inheritor. Dark Apostle of the Chaos Marines. You will have milk, and bring death to those who stand against you. You have been staying in the garage chamber of this structure, as it is the only room large enough to accommodate you. The door rises, and you march.

However, there doesn't seem to be any chaos cults about. You notice a few humans contacting local law enforcement as you wander around with your sword in hand.

Try to posses the sink, and make it spew milk.

You take a moment to recover from the blow dealt to you by Goatsby, and are unable to reach the sink at this moment.

Name: Roboute Guilliman
Description:Honestly just look him up.
Why do you want milk? To help me heal. I just woke up from stasis.

Spawn outside. Too big to fit inside.
Stop the Chaos Legion guy from going anywhere. By force if necessary.

6 vs 3

As Eliphas wanders the streets, a beam of light appears as the Primarch of the Ultramarines appears as an avatar before him. The two marines draw swords. The clashing blades hammer together again and again. Gradually, Eliphas is forced back. His brutal attacks would slaughter mortal men in droves, but Guilliman predicts each swing and stab. Eventually, Guilliman parries a blow and carves a deep gash into Eliphas's chestplate.

Obtain one of the tiny splatters of milk that are in the room. Win the game.

5
(Wow, two fives in a row.)

You look around through the muck. Among the debris is a single perfect puddle of milk, about the size of your hand. It shines before you. You don't have anything to pick it up with or put it in, but it's there, and it is yours for the taking.

Cook a bovine biscuit and feed it to a random other person other than the Shadow, turning them into a cow!

1
You duck into the kitchen, and cook up a bovine biscuit. It looks like a fine meal, if it weren't cursed. Unfortunately, you briefly forget and try a taste. You notice the flavor is a bit wrong as you turn into a bull.

Parkour my way to the nearby store. And remember no time for opening doors just charge trough it.

2

You run and leap through the city. As you cross between two rooftops, you see the two Space Marines fighting below you. Eventually, you think make it to the store and smash through the entrance. Unfortunately, this is actually the library. A librarian harshly orders you to keep it down.

[Glass]

...Retry possessing the sink

No, I have a better idea.

Possess the Chaos Marine's sword, turn it into milk a popsicle a fudgesicle.

[OceanSoul]

Retry! With my cooking skills, I should be able to cook just as well!

[ziizo]

Pull a hand into your trench coat and retrieve a book you almost forgot you had to return it today.
Then run towards the store.

[ATHATH]

Put face in milk. Win game.

[CABL]

"You should try harder, lapdog." Said Eliphas while touching his gash.

Draw the power of Khornate Daemons, granting me +2 to any melee attack for 3 turns.
Do a combo of 4 powerful horizontal sword swings and finish with stab in the chest

Can I respawn as someone else when Eliphas dies? I've got plenty of characters: porn star, Doomguy, Randomly Generated General from Rome: Total War, etc.

And yes, my character speech in this RTD will be in pink.

[Enemy post]

"You should try harder, lapdog." Said Eliphas while touching his gash.

Draw the power of Khornate Daemons, granting me +2 to any melee attack for 3 turns.
Do a combo of 4 powerful horizontal sword swings and finish with stab in the chest

Can I respawn as someone else when Eliphas dies? I've got plenty of characters: porn star, Doomguy, Randomly Generated General from Rome: Total War, etc.

And yes, my character speech in this RTD will be in pink.

You can be pretty much whatever you want, Doomguy sounds fun. I'm going to keep control of when people get bonuses, however. If I let you have +2 for 3 turns, that would effectively guarantee victory unless Johiah countered with an arms race of bonus granting actions.

[CABL]

"You should try harder, lapdog." Said Eliphas while touching his gash.

Draw the power of Khornate Daemons, granting me +2 to any melee attack for 3 turns.
Do a combo of 4 powerful horizontal sword swings and finish with stab in the chest

Can I respawn as someone else when Eliphas dies? I've got plenty of characters: porn star, Doomguy, Randomly Generated General from Rome: Total War, etc.

And yes, my character speech in this RTD will be in pink.

You can be pretty much whatever you want, Doomguy sounds fun. I'm going to keep control of when people get bonuses, however.

It would not be Doomguy. It would be something completely different and random.

Johiah can try turning GM into Matt Ward (He's a huge Ultramarines and Grey Knights fan).