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How fun is SPAMKINGDOM series?

Mind-bogglingly popular game series that you follow from early on and cannot stop, waiting for new installment like a drooling addict.
Long-runner soap opera you're too invested into to just stop watching it.
A fun little comic strip in the daily newspaper that's been around forever.
3/6
Who said it's fun? I didn't for sure.
I'm just waiting here for it to die horribly already so it will stop showing on my Unread Posts list.

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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Houlandin IV of Methiant-Cydwyl!  (Read 719744 times)

Prophet

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8895 on: March 24, 2018, 07:59:39 pm »

A You know what sure. Let's expand the inheritance law. I mean with Cyl we've basically just been picking which ever of our male descendants we like most at the time to be our heir anyway. I kinda hope that just becomes the standard anyway. I mean we're the Emperor we should be able to pick which of our descendants we want to inherit our throne. It is our throne after all. So might as well be able to pick females if we want. I mean of course any children we have as an empress would have our last name and be of our dynasty/bloodline instead of the fathers! We'd be Empress if they want to fight about it then they can experience the vicious Yoean Honor-Stubbornness personally!
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.... You've doomed us all. Granted. Everyone except for traps are executed. Random sci-fi nonsense is required to be taught in schools.
A cute intersex harem with everyone in love with the androgynous king and smart and useful enough into pushing the kingdom forward.

mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8896 on: March 24, 2018, 08:05:58 pm »

The army number is not so bad as I feared. I still feel like we missed a chunk of their story amidst the tumult, though.
Very well, A
(Please note that this spends our expected income for the year – or more, if reclaiming the silver mine keeps dragging.)


I actually think the bill of rights would be a good thing. It sets up cultural innovation and in the long term grows the economy, possibly even the raw population number, when the common men and women are not in thrall to whim of nobles. Yet inheritance reform will suffice to sate me.
For now, mwahahaha! Excuse me while I plan my rise to the Chancellorship through bribery and demagoguery.
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Chevaleresse

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8897 on: March 24, 2018, 08:06:34 pm »

A
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Weirdsound

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8898 on: March 24, 2018, 08:54:07 pm »

A.

Lets expand inheritance law, absorb Cyldwyl by giving their king the imperial crown, and retire as the greatest character in Spamkingdom history (again).
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Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8899 on: March 24, 2018, 10:14:59 pm »

A

Goddamit. If we only sold off that fancy jewel to a merchant instead of keeping it. Can we never have nice things?
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Weirdsound

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8900 on: March 24, 2018, 10:24:50 pm »

A

Goddamit. If we only sold off that fancy jewel to a merchant instead of keeping it. Can we never have nice things?

Clearly not if it they are fancy jewels. Perhaps we should stop shamelessly plundering tom- bah. Who am I kidding? That isn't going to happen.

On the bright side, the rapid death of the Houlandin bloodline once again opens us up to the peaceful aquisition of our neighbors to the north if all goes well. That is a better prize than any damn necklace in my book.
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Maximum Spin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8901 on: March 24, 2018, 10:32:18 pm »

I mean, I like shamelessly plundering tombs as much as the next guy, but we should really arrange to get a court wizard so we can make sure things aren't cursed. :P
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helmacon

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8902 on: March 24, 2018, 10:52:15 pm »

A
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omada

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8903 on: March 25, 2018, 01:09:47 am »

A, we can always issue no edicts
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Harry Baldman

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8904 on: March 25, 2018, 01:50:21 am »

A!

At least if we expand the primogeniture law we'd be able to find out (and possibly utilize) the traits of our many (well, actually not that many) assorted daughters. And if we can't make King Erik the Emperor, there's still the possibility of picking his twin brother Estjald for some wonderful symmetry.
« Last Edit: March 25, 2018, 02:52:42 am by Harry Baldman »
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8905 on: March 25, 2018, 03:47:46 am »

MILITARY EDICTS:

Matters of military hierarchy, philosophy of war and development of military tech.

-

Expand Primogeniture Law:
A string of bad luck can render a monarch without a male heir or cause succession debates. Rather than risk some unpleasant consequences of such a situation, it might be better to allow a skilled female to ascend to the throne, especially if she is as good at matters of the governance as any other ruler.

Issue the Bill of Rights:
A standarized code of basic laws of the common peoples. Even if peasants will have nothing else left, they will always have their basic freedoms, helping ease their minds in times of emergency - and perhaps allow the spirit of liberty and humanism to blossom (for good or worse).

Enact Settlement Policy:
Guarantee that those willing to settle in previously undeveloped lands or territories yet unclaimed by any nation will be given a certain amount of money to help further their effort. However, this might cause a severe drain on the Treasury, especially during times of sudden, mass migrations to the countryside.

CULTURAL EDICTS:

Matters of religion, culture and art.

Establish Calendar of Festivities:
Rather than throw a festival every few years to celebrate a bontiful harvest, let's instead establish a cyclic and stable calendar of state-sponsored festivities for the whole year. This will cause a drain on the Treasury, but hey - people love festivals!

Endorse State Patronage of Arts:
To help develop the nation culturally, set aside certain amount of budget money to sponsor sculptors, poets, musicians and painters. It will be a constant drain on the Treasury, but think of how prestigious your nation will become, what with those masterpieces of art popping left and right!

Establish The Royal House of Learning:
Scholars scribbling down books in secluded libraries and scriptories should be a thing of the past! Let's instead establish a centre of learning, where those of intellect can exchange ideas and educate those willing to learn. It will help the nation develop technologically, although maintenance of this beacon of enlightenment will obviously require yearly costs.

REVOKE EDICT: Revokes a previously implemented edict, either to cut spending, appease some disgruntled subjects, or both. On the other hand, it might tick off some other peoples, potentially causing a deadly cascade of discontent.

Late Spring, 1135 AD: Established the Fireblood Court:
Creation of a specialized military branch devoted purely to development of Fireblood arms to ensure they are aplenty and of best designs around. This will allow to centralize the production, research and budgeting of Fireblood weaponry rather than having some errant alchemists and engineers running around, trying to make things happen.

End of Year 1135 AD: Proclaimed Religious Equality:
Travelers, merchants, immigrants; they all bring new beliefs and philosophies into the country. Rather than fight those foreign influences, it might be best to allow all peoples free worship on equal level no matter the size and beliefs of the congregation, to help all different worshippers achieve a certain degree to harmony and peace.

End of Year 1139 AD: Established Recruitment Offices:
Mandatory training for youths is a good thing, but after bloodier-than-usual wars, there might be shortage of men to replenish the ranks. If we were to expand on the royal bureaucracy to include offices for traveling civilian recruiters and offer citizenship grants for mercenaries and travelers looking for a new home, our Army could refill its ranks much faster.

End of Year 1140 AD: Established The Council of Statesmen:
Creation of a small council of governmental officials who will be tasked with helping the government run smoother alongside traditional advisors, and, of course, the monarch himself. This will help strengthen the Imperial Authority, even in dire times, and help pass edicts quicker, although giving even more political power away from the throne than in the past might become a source of troubles one day.

End of Year 1142 AD: Established Passage Tax:
All those travelers, adventurers, merchants and others are moving through the country for free! Let's establish a tax for those entering and leaving our country - this will earn us nice profits each year, although it might slow down immigration and convince some merchants to seek passage through elsewhere.

End of Year 1146 AD: Established Diplomatic Corps:
Creation of a small but highly professional cabinet of diplomats and ambassadors that would visit neighbouring countries on regular basis to strengthen ties with nearby rulers and their nobles, and maybe even develop favorable treaties with them.

Summer 1152 AD: Issued the Codex of Training Regimen:
A set of efficient (and slightly draconian) requirements and practices of training to ensure that the Army gets only the best recruits of them all. This will make the Army much better in combat, although there might be a problem to fill yearly recruitment quotas sometimes.

End of Year 1153 AD: Established the Shadowranks:
Politics often involve underhanded tactics. A castle full of commoner staff and visiting foreigners just asks for a disaster to occur. Let's have the military form a professional division of most loyal of soldiers, who would protect the Emperor, his family and important state officials, during the day, night, war, peace, revelries of festivals and monotony of daily life.

End of Year 1154 AD: Established Religion Tax:
Various congregations are given away territories and various tax exemptions for those. With erosion of religious influences upon the state, its prime opportunity to dip our hand into prime source of income that is donations and tithes gathered by those numerous cults present in the empire. It will surely not please them, and, by extension, your subjects.
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Harry Baldman

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8906 on: March 25, 2018, 03:52:21 am »

Expand Primogeniture Law!
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ZBridges

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8907 on: March 25, 2018, 04:03:38 am »

No Edict.
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Rockeater

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8908 on: March 25, 2018, 04:07:40 am »

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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8909 on: March 25, 2018, 04:24:34 am »

Primogeniture Law
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