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How fun is SPAMKINGDOM series?

Mind-bogglingly popular game series that you follow from early on and cannot stop, waiting for new installment like a drooling addict.
Long-runner soap opera you're too invested into to just stop watching it.
A fun little comic strip in the daily newspaper that's been around forever.
3/6
Who said it's fun? I didn't for sure.
I'm just waiting here for it to die horribly already so it will stop showing on my Unread Posts list.

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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Houlandin IV of Methiant-Cydwyl!  (Read 719430 times)

omada

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8100 on: March 09, 2018, 10:25:03 pm »

The silver is honestly not worth another war right now.  But if he wants to go back on a deal after we finally forgave the assassination attempts to help secure his throne he is more then willing to do so.

B

Wait a second... isn't going back on deals this guy's MO? Didn't he break a peace treaty with the Kahnate to deliver a surprise attack?

Nope, I think it was the king which he usurped the throne, he attacked them because they were already at war again against them and he needed to make sure the khanates are weak (I don't checked for facts, i am just using my drowsy memory)



B, if he can't pay with silver, he can pay with those textiles they had, we can sell them here for a nice price
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Competent reader (any know lenguage)
Novice english wordsmith
Dabbling english speaker (rusty)
He is short, with a small and failed beard
He likes wood, spears, ducks for their nobility, and rabbits for their weak hearts and funny reproduction rate.
he has a hard time to focus, and values, err almost everything, he dreams of mastering a skill.

Baffler

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8101 on: March 09, 2018, 10:29:37 pm »

B. Queen Dogethe is the only NPC we could ever count on tbh.
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Location subject to periodic change.
Baffler likes silver, walnut trees, the color green, tanzanite, and dogs for their loyalty. When possible he prefers to consume beef, iced tea, and cornbread. He absolutely detests ticks.

Maximum Spin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8102 on: March 09, 2018, 10:32:56 pm »

Nope, I think it was the king which he usurped the throne, he attacked them because they were already at war again against them and he needed to make sure the khanates are weak (I don't checked for facts, i am just using my drowsy memory)
I believe you're correct. The previous King of Eldrican was a total dick, but this one has been fine. That said I think he probably is out of silver. I don't want to go to war with them, I want to make them vassals. We have blood ties with the kingdom and everything!
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omada

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8103 on: March 09, 2018, 10:41:05 pm »

B. Queen Dogethe is the only NPC we could ever count on tbh.

Hey, Cidric is doing his best, even with a civil war he gave us some horseman he is just a bit dumb but looks like he has charisma and martial skills

and the first liege of spamkingdom 2 was a nice guy, his son was a dick



Nope, I think it was the king which he usurped the throne, he attacked them because they were already at war again against them and he needed to make sure the khanates are weak (I don't checked for facts, i am just using my drowsy memory)
I believe you're correct. The previous King of Eldrican was a total dick, but this one has been fine. That said I think he probably is out of silver. I don't want to go to war with them, I want to make them vassals. We have blood ties with the kingdom and everything!

Trying to vassalize someone with more lands than our entire kingdom will be hard and unproductive, giving this offer will be a call for war maybe, instead it can give us lands that are well populated or lands close to mountains (we need very few to have a monopoly over the passage of these lands be it from south, north, west or east, if we one day turn into a federation with helliste and Cydwyll or just conquer them every merchant WILL HAVE to pass through our lands and pay our border taxes and land closer to mountains maybe increase our chance of finding mines i think)
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Competent reader (any know lenguage)
Novice english wordsmith
Dabbling english speaker (rusty)
He is short, with a small and failed beard
He likes wood, spears, ducks for their nobility, and rabbits for their weak hearts and funny reproduction rate.
he has a hard time to focus, and values, err almost everything, he dreams of mastering a skill.

Puppyguard

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8104 on: March 10, 2018, 01:34:06 am »

B
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8105 on: March 10, 2018, 04:36:06 am »

You decide to remind Tetan I of the silver deal with a letter.

1149 AD, Midwinter

A report from the Treasurer arrives; besides usual arrivals, the glasswork provided some money as well.

Also, an envoy from King Euron arrives. He and his court are willing to accept your seniority, as long as they retain some autonomy and powers over their compatriots.

A) I'm as constant as the eastern star, I accept naught but unconditional surrender, because everyone is destined to become my subject sooner or later!
B) Fine.
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Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

milo christiansen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8106 on: March 10, 2018, 04:37:04 am »

A Who does this idiot think he is?
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ZBridges

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8107 on: March 10, 2018, 04:41:20 am »

A
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Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8108 on: March 10, 2018, 04:42:54 am »

A - We say again, you had your chance to ask for that peacefully.
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VoidSlayer

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8109 on: March 10, 2018, 04:49:51 am »

B He seems to have the loyalty of the locals, I say we let him take care of it for now.  We might be an empire but feudal rights is a hard system to stamp down, if we keep going at this rate we will just depopulate and demoralize the whole area.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Rockeater

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8110 on: March 10, 2018, 05:03:20 am »

A too much rebelion from this place to give them anything.
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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

Harry Baldman

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8111 on: March 10, 2018, 05:47:16 am »

A

We really should just give them the counteroffer of "if you send us the head of your 'king' you'll get off with imprisonment instead of hanging, drawing and quartering".

Also it might not be a bad idea to put out that Bill of Rights afterward to get a surge of happiness and hopefully weaken the old guard that keep instigating these rebellions.

And besides, it's kind of relaxing being out here instead of at the palace. People barely bother us about anything and the air's reasonably fresh, what more could a reclusive emperor want out of life?
« Last Edit: March 10, 2018, 05:53:46 am by Harry Baldman »
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mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8112 on: March 10, 2018, 08:02:21 am »

A

What really gets me is this 'King' business. Old Eval had a Duke by title – Euron is also putting forward a claim for the throne of Lametania. This character is after a lot more than he can actually hold. (Unlike us, who are admittedly usurping conquerors but we hold things nicely.) I don't reward rebellion, and I especially don't reward greedy rebels.
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8113 on: March 10, 2018, 08:03:07 am »

You decide to keep on starving them.

1149 AD, Late Winter

You receive a report from the forces in distant northeast of Agares; apparently a huge battle was fought at the base of Bloodpeak mountains. According to the report - which seems implausible to you - there was fifty thousand people involved, a third of that being alliance forces. Half of the numbers, about equally from both sides of the conflict, perished in the fighting.

You ask for confirmation, and more detailed summary of your Army's numbers and losses.

1150 AD, Spring

Shortly after you welcome the new year under the lit sky, an envoy from Evalians arrives. Humbled, he wears the traditional white scarf of surrender.

A) Ha! Time to raze the city to the ground and show them what I think of rebels!
B) I accept equally humbly, and the instigators are welcome to find a new home somewhere outside Methiant.
C) March into the keep and murder those responsible. If the citizens behave, they will be unharmed.
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #8114 on: March 10, 2018, 08:05:59 am »

B
We've won, now we can afford to prove we're not so heartless.
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