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Author Topic: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD  (Read 76558 times)

Mallos

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #15 on: July 04, 2017, 02:48:17 am »

Sorry Mallos, bit late. Someone's gonna die eventually, then you can get in.

Didn't even notice. Oh well.
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PaPaj

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #16 on: July 04, 2017, 03:11:57 am »

Go and become a serial killer in disguise of a town drunk
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NRDL

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #17 on: July 04, 2017, 04:59:52 am »

Alright, what I'm gonna do is do the turns of the first six people who post, regardless of whether they were in the starting six or not. Mallos, since you posted initially, you're in for this turn, at the end. It'll be first come first served for six players, each turn.

FUCK YEAH BITCHES

Use my new Elder God powers and my magic to trap the soul of the being I just bodyjacked in a crystal that happens to be completely psychically inert so the thing can't whisper its way out of it.

[3] The powers of your new form are mighty indeed. In the material realm, you manifest as a multitude of eldritch tentacles ( for now ) and in the Plane of Horrors, which is where the portal opens to you're...something else. It's really difficult to explain. Suffice to say, in the dimension your "body" is from, it's malleable.

That being said, you decide to knock the Elder God even further to the curb. Reaching out with your tentacles, you conjure up a crystal out of thin air. You attempt to grab the Ethereal Elder God with your appendages, but upon feeling the touch of its former body, it fights back. Elder God is pissed, something it hasn't had to feel in a very long time, and is currently stalemating your attempts to grab ahold of it.



Summon an ambulance

[4] You don't summon an ambulance itself, but you do manage to transport a modern day paramedic crew with equipment to your location. They're very confused, but upon seeing the car wreckage as well as your injuries, they get to work.

You are no longer about to die. Still quite injured though, according to your paramedics mostly due to shrapnel near your organs. For now, you're stabilised.



Get that Elder God spirit inside me. ASAP!

Seeing the tattered and forlorn essence of the Elder God swirling above you, you open your body being in order to welcome it, so that it may materialise in the physical realm, and share its knowledge and power with you.

Unfortunately, [3] the actions of the Tentacles coming out of the portal are currently locking the Ethereal God in a state of "combat", and so it cannot hear your psychic cries for fusion.



Summon a magical spirit of assembly, then force it to assemble the coffeeshop. After that, it can do whatever it likes so long as it doesn't act against me.

[6] Opening a channel to the shadow realm, you contract out an assembler spirit. He materialises in a puff of smoke, calling himself Job the Builder. In a literal blink of an eye, Job possesses the various coffeeshop parts and assembles them lickety split. Your coffeeshop is built!

"Now, sir, that'll just be one immortal soul."

What? This wasn't part of the contract! you say.

"Shoulda read the fine print buddy. If you don't cough up, we're taking your soul AND the shop."

Vanishing once again, you see Job enter your mint condition Coffeeshop, and to your horror, the building grows legs and arms!

You are now fighting the Coffee Shop monster.



RAISE MY SCOWLING FACE FROM THE FLOOR AND TELEKINETICALLY GLASS THE BARTENDER WITH HIS OWN GRUBBY GLASSWARE. THEN, STAND AND DUST MYSELF OFF BEFORE GRACEFULLY VAULTING THE BAR TO AVAIL MYSELF OF THE NOW-UNTENDED LIQUOR

[4] Smoke practically coming out of your ears, you pick yourself and fling the glass straight into the bartender's face. It doesn't break, but its definitely enough to knock the man off his feet, and you can hear him moaning in pain behind the counter.

[3] You are about to vault over said counter and claim your hard won liquor when a patron near you grabs your arm.

"Buddy, he didn't mean nothing by that, we're all friends here right? Let's not take this out of hand, okay?"



A shimmer of light. "I, THE GREAT GOATSBY, HAVE... oh. WHERE AM I?"

Summon Ouroborous. I need a mount to get the fuck out of here, after all.


[1] You try and summon the serpent that eats itself. Unfortunately, as a paradoxical creature, it can only exist in the theoretical realm, and upon coming into contact with this reality it shudders and dies.

"HE WASSSS MY FRIEND. HOW DARE YOUUUUUU."

Oh dear. Out of the portal you plucked the Ouroboros from, the Midgard Serpent Jormungander has appeared. Specifically, it's face. Which is as large as a mountain. Welp.
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GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

Xantalos

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #18 on: July 04, 2017, 05:03:26 am »

AW C'MON YOU FARKIN PANSY BITCH, GET IN MY CRYSTAL SO I CAN USE YOU AS A POWER SOURCE

GIT IN MAH CRYSTAL

the elder god that is, not me
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

ziizo

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #19 on: July 04, 2017, 05:05:23 am »

Thank the paramedics then send them back to the future.
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GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.

Mallos

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #20 on: July 04, 2017, 05:19:20 am »

"WHAT... THAT'S FUCKING DISAPPOINTING. IT WORKED LAST TIME, WHAT SHITTY BERENSTAIN BEARS WORLD DO I LIVE IN?"

THE GREAT GOATSBY looks confused, or at least as confused as a goat can look HE IS TOTALLY A HUMAN. DISREGARD.

"WAIT, AREN'T YOU JUST LIKE... ANOTHER INTERPRETATION OF OUROBOROUS? GUESS IT WORKED AFTER ALL."

Magically enslave Jormungandr.
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PaPaj

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #21 on: July 04, 2017, 05:39:41 am »

Become a serial killer in disguise of the Town Drunk
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FallacyofUrist

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #22 on: July 04, 2017, 06:33:28 am »

"One immortal soul, you say. Not necessarily mine, I say." Rip out a paramedic's soul and pay with that.
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Sarrak

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #23 on: July 04, 2017, 07:13:20 am »

MAXIMAL FUSION! POWER OF A THOUSAND TENTACLES SHALL BE MINE!
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Science is always important. But it needs more flaming cats. Can't we build bridge-based catapults and fling flaming cats at the dust and goo?

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NRDL

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #24 on: July 04, 2017, 07:31:41 am »

Last turn for the day. Night everyone.



AW C'MON YOU FARKIN PANSY BITCH, GET IN MY CRYSTAL SO I CAN USE YOU AS A POWER SOURCE

GIT IN MAH CRYSTAL

the elder god that is, not me


[6] ( Mein Gott )

Utilising your magical reserves, as well as the Overpowering Presence provided by your new form, you latch onto the Ethereal God and successfully cram it into the Crystal. Unfortunately, before you can completely seal it and prevent its influence from leaking out, the Crystal falls from your Eldritch Grip!

See Sarrak's turn for what happens.



Thank the paramedics then send them back to the future.

[1] You thank these hardworking heroes for doing their job, and proceed to return them to their time, but one of them suddenly has their soul ripped from their body! ( See FallacyofUrist's turn )

The other one is understandably upset, and in her anger, punches you in the face! Ouch. Knocking you down certainly doesn't help keeping your wounds un-aggravated. You are once again at risk of bleeding out.



"WHAT... THAT'S FUCKING DISAPPOINTING. IT WORKED LAST TIME, WHAT SHITTY BERENSTAIN BEARS WORLD DO I LIVE IN?"

THE GREAT GOATSBY looks confused, or at least as confused as a goat can look HE IS TOTALLY A HUMAN. DISREGARD.

"WAIT, AREN'T YOU JUST LIKE... ANOTHER INTERPRETATION OF OUROBOROUS? GUESS IT WORKED AFTER ALL."

Magically enslave Jormungandr.

[5] Deciding to take advantage of what is effectively a super-sized Ouroboros, you reach into the angry World Serpent's mind and successfully dominate its mind! Apparently waiting for Ragnarok has left its mental faculties rusty, so your mastery is quick and effective.

You now have the fucking World Serpent as a mount.



Become a serial killer in disguise of the Town Drunk

[6] You immediately magically wrap yourself in the garments of your average drunken wastrel, and with this FOOLPROOF disguise, you strangle some poor washer woman going about her day. In the scuffle, however, your poor victim managed to claw you in the face. When the people find her body, they notice the blood on her hands, and its only a matter of time before your scars are noticed as well.



"One immortal soul, you say. Not necessarily mine, I say." Rip out a paramedic's soul and pay with that.

[5] You take the soul of the hapless paramedic nearby, and offer it to the Coffeeshop Monster. Job exits the Monster, which reverts back to a normal caffeine establishment. Taking the screaming and terrified, Job shakes your hand and heads off.

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a non-possessed Coffeeshop.



MAXIMAL FUSION! POWER OF A THOUSAND TENTACLES SHALL BE MINE!

You attempt to fuse your being with the Ethereal God, but you instead watch in horror as its essence is contained in a crystal by the very Tentacled body it once had. Suddenly, though, the Crystal slips! Reaching forward, you [2] do not catch it, and it rolls off, seemingly with a will of its own.

"I know you can hear me..., a voice says. It comes from the crystal! But where is it?
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NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

Mallos

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #25 on: July 04, 2017, 07:35:57 am »

"ALL BECOMES RIGHT, GIVEN THE PROPER NUDGE. YIP-YIP, MOTHERFUCKER."
Climb on the World Serpent's back. Ride him to a more densely populated area: I need a large and defenseless population to experiment on.
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Glass

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #26 on: July 04, 2017, 07:38:46 am »

Ah, Hellstralia. Wonderful.
{carefully} Study the wildlife, including that soul crystal that just rolled up to my foot.

"Ah, why hello there, Minotaur. No, I am not a demon..." [eyes glow blue, air around me cools drastically] "I am significantly more powerful than that."
« Last Edit: July 04, 2017, 11:19:56 am by Glass »
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Quote from: FallacyOfUrist (on Discord, 11/15/21)
Glass is, as usual, correct.
Yep, as ever, I bestow upon Glass the expected +1
I'm gonna say we go with whatever Glass's idea is.

FallacyofUrist

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #27 on: July 04, 2017, 07:39:28 am »

"Uh, sorry." Heal zilzo by transforming his body into his subconscious ideal form.
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ziizo

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #28 on: July 04, 2017, 08:14:40 am »

"No problem"

Before Job goes away I try to swap the paramedic soul with the the souls of two random people in the town
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GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.

Sarrak

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Re: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD
« Reply #29 on: July 04, 2017, 08:20:24 am »

Heh. Simple. Fuse with my surroundings. Crystal is nearby, so it will be affected.
Logged
Science is always important. But it needs more flaming cats. Can't we build bridge-based catapults and fling flaming cats at the dust and goo?

It's time for the ATHATH Death Counter to increase once more in celebration for the end of the world.
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