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Author Topic: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates  (Read 2255 times)

FantasticDorf

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Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« on: April 04, 2018, 05:39:08 pm »

Once again your Monarch has mandated the impossible, they want a stone bed made of gniess for some inexplicable reason despite the protests of your best craftsmen and mason's that such a thing is impractical, unworkable and insane


Impossible demands will be highlighted in [!red with exclaimation points!], the monarch will be angry without someone to blame when the mandate comes to pass but it will be a notable event referenced in their reign, dwarves with comedic values will gain a positive thought about the absurdity of the situation and it may form the basis for what some may call the butt of jokes. Somehow achieving a impossible demand with a artifact (which is very slightly influenced between the period the mandate is set out) which will shower the monarch in a tantrum esque reset and counter-act the humiliation they might feel, will also add to the mythos of the artifact itself & be noted as a historical effect at the feat.

Its just a solution to the usually coddled lifestyle of mandate demanders with their never ending wants, and each impossible mandate is tracked as a historical instance for themselves and attributed to their reign to be ridiculed or praised, as set by personality traits like greedyness & ambition. Only dwarves and dwarven subjects in foreign nations are really able to pull it off without the prospect of looking like fools.

Hopefully as a result, silly demands can remain in the game even after they have been officially fixed, since its a known trait of the dwarven psyche's disposition for storytelling madness.
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Bumber

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2018, 11:15:49 am »

I don't think there's anything wrong with having a gneiss bed, in particular. Dwarves have gneiss thrones.

Cheese beds, on the other hand...
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LMeire

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2018, 05:07:14 am »

The Romans slept on stone beds, stone pillows too. If anything it's the masons that are being unreasonable.

https://i.imgur.com/GGZevnt.jpg
« Last Edit: April 07, 2018, 05:09:13 am by LMeire »
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FantasticDorf

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #3 on: April 07, 2018, 08:27:14 am »

A stone bed was meant to be a tangible artifact demand that can be achieved for the desired effects of completing the 'impossible' mandate rather than anything protesting the feasability of a stone bed versus a cabinet constructed out of raven teeth. I had no idea people would be so caught up on it.  :P
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Starver

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #4 on: April 07, 2018, 08:31:28 am »

I think I would be caught up on a cabinet of raven teeth. Loads of sharp edges, I expect.
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Azerty

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #5 on: April 07, 2018, 02:37:17 pm »

It could create a motive for some citizens to revolt against a noble.
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DG

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2018, 08:30:12 am »

I'd like impossible or ridiculous mandates be reserved for the insane or someone using them as a cynical device to further some agenda, and more rarely for the very stupid or vain. Large walls across entire borders comes to mind.
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Anandar

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2018, 07:49:39 am »

Um... since when did ravens have teeth? I think the nobles would be more inclined to ask for a cabinet made of beak or raven feet?
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Starver

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2018, 09:34:33 am »

Impossible mandate, I think was the point. (Deliberately or otherwise.) I'd have to look into the raws to make sure but it could choose teeth as a material then ignore/use the fact that its follow-up choice of tooth-source wasn't in fact capable of sourcing such tooths anyway.

(Do writing desks have teeth? Alice wants to know.)
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FantasticDorf

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #9 on: April 15, 2018, 07:30:53 am »

Furniture in itself can't be made out of teeth or bone without being mooded, and like Starver says, its even more absurd because crows don't have teeth BP parts in the first place being the point of the suggestion in the first place to set the ruler up to be looking unreasonable bordering on deranged and draw off that.

Applied deliberately to create a crisis for players or the worldgen AI, the tooth example is a extreme lose-lose situation because its not actually possible to obtain it, compared to my first example of a gniess bed, which may be more challenging if there's none on your map.

It could create a motive for some citizens to revolt against a noble.

Yes definitely.
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ShinyandKittens

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #10 on: April 15, 2018, 02:34:43 pm »

I don't think there's anything wrong with having a gneiss bed, in particular. Dwarves have gneiss thrones.

Cheese beds, on the other hand...

I want a cheese bed
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Starver

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #11 on: April 15, 2018, 03:21:17 pm »

I don't think there's anything wrong with having a gneiss bed, in particular. Dwarves have gneiss thrones.

Cheese beds, on the other hand...

I want a cheese bed
A huge beddo? E dam! That would brie a fetaccompli...
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mikekchar

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #12 on: April 16, 2018, 02:14:20 am »

*I* have frequently slept on a stone pillow (or more correctly a gravel pillow -- essentially a sack of gravel).  It's insanely comfortable, especially in the summer when it is hot.  It holds your head still which seems to be a requirement for me to sleep.  My normal pillow is made of buckwheat (literally roasted buckwheat in a bag).  Very nice in the winter -- be careful about insects, though :-)

Rock bed would be nice, but only if it is heated.  A slab of rock that size has a lot of thermal mass.  Even if it is only a few degrees below body temperature it will suck all the heat out of you.  Anyone who has slept on an unheated water bed can relate.
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saharo

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #13 on: April 24, 2018, 03:31:30 pm »

Let me add another non-gameplay content :o
Stone bed is actually a thing in Korea if I remember right...let me google it a moment...
here it is :D
https://youtu.be/77wb67aOXOM
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Aquillion

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Re: Its not a bug its a feature - Impossible mandates
« Reply #14 on: April 26, 2018, 03:26:32 am »

Not every noble should make impossible mandates; it should depend on their personality traits, such as THOUGHTLESSNESS, IMAGINATION, ABSTRACT_INCLINED, and to a lesser extent extreme personality traits in general.  A sane, stable, intelligent leader will not demand things they know to be impossible, whereas someone with serious personality disorders might.
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