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Author Topic: Roll to Communism  (Read 5729 times)

Coolrune206

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #45 on: September 11, 2018, 06:03:34 pm »

Alekseyevich, satisfied, finds some other police stuffs to do.
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"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

Rockeater

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #46 on: September 11, 2018, 11:20:51 pm »

Igor, to prove he's a communist will share everything he have including information on other capitalists groups.
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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

King Zultan

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #47 on: September 12, 2018, 02:36:16 am »

Tell the bodyguards that they're protecting a capitalist spy that has replaced the real Stalin.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

Imic

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #48 on: September 12, 2018, 09:21:45 am »

I go to visit Glorious Friend Stalin who loves you, to present him with a ruble as a present, and possibly start a fight with any Capitalist pigs I run into.
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Imic's no longer allowed to vote.
Quote from: smyttysmyth
Well aren't you cheery
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SML6

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #49 on: September 12, 2018, 02:14:17 pm »

Round 4: Brought to you by Alekseyevich's potato farm!

Quote from: Gribov Vadimovich
Inform Government Agents of Youth Uprising. Have the children slaughtered. This is only way!

[4 - 1 = 3: Minor Success]
You stop the Government Agents, however, they believe you to be pranking them, as the situation is so ridiculous.

A seperate Agent walks up to you, and you explain the story to him. He heads to stop the kindergartener uprising.

Quote from: Agent Mitrovich (The_Two_Eternities)
Investigate the room with the destroyed door.

[3: Minor Success]
You make your way past the doorframe where the door used to lie, and inside you find a sight most grusome, a dead body. You can see a torn lab coat on the body, so they were likely a scientist.

Quote from: Ivan Sinov (CABL)
((Since I've missed this turn, I'll use TWO actions instead of ONE!))

Eat some bread with salted herring to soothe my mooskles. Fish sandwich, if you will.
After that, go to the arena and fight my opponent.

Eh, sure, I'll allow it.

Action 1: Eat some bread with salted herring to soothe my mooskles. Fish sandwich, if you will.
[1 - 1 = 0: Universal Failure]
You finish making the fish sandwich and happen to glance by the river you got the fish from, when you realize there are fish-people coming out of the river, and they look angry.

[6 for Ivan Sinov / 5 for Fish-People]
The fish-people attempt to attack you, but you're able to fend most of them off.
Suddenly, a smell hits your senses... Sushi
The fish-people smell it too, and start charging towards the nearest city.
(+1 to next roll, cause you'll need it)

Action 2: After that, go to the arena and fight my opponent.
[1 + 1 = 2: Failure]
Unfortunately, you got to the arena too late, since you were busy surviving the fish-people, and your match has been cancelled.

Quote from: Raskolnikov (Leodanny)
Free men in gulags

[6 - 1 = 5: Major Success]
You break back into the gulags and steal the guards keys.
Once you make it back into the main prison room, you unlock all the doors, and tell everyone to run before the guards wake up.
Every prisoner makes it out.
(+1 to next roll)

Quote from: Alexsandr Senaviev (0cra_tr0per)
>Attempt again to make the DP-30.

[4: Success]
There wasn't much you could do for improvement, but you have improved the DP-29 and made schematics for the DP-30.
(+1 to next roll)

Quote from: Andrey (Diaper or The Cow)
Damn! I shall start a revolt, and lead a group of rebels into a battle that will span centuries! For Mother Russia!

You hear some noise from the guard's room. Suddenly, a man comes out and starts opening all the cells, and telling everyone to run before the guards make it out.

You've escape from the gulag.

[2: Failure]
You attempt to convince the escaped prisoners to revolt, but they refuse. Most of them are happy with perfect Communist society.

Quote from: Marx, the Wizard
"WEAK FOOLS! RELENT FROM YOUR CAPITALIST WAYS, OR I SHALL MAKE YOU! THE REVOLUTION CANNOT BE STOPPED, AND YOU CANNOT HIDE BEHIND YOUR FALSE 'COMMUNISM'. PRAY FOR MERCY FROM YOUR NEW GOD!"

Summon perfect robotic workers to assist me. Fix my legs using free health care magic. Replace them with untiring cyborg legs, so that I may march for the cause without stopping!
Once filthy fake communist authorities arrive, link their minds together in a hivemind, creating a true communist structure.

Also. Cause a revolution in Stalin's spinal column.

[6 - 1 = 5: Major Success]
You use your magic to create Nanobots that have perfect communist hivemind society.
The Nanobots repair your legs to perfect condition, in fact, even better than before.

[5 for Nanobots / 6 for Government Agents]
The Government Agents arrive, and assume the Nanobots are causing trouble.
Government Agents try to destroy the Nanobots, but the Nanobots, being a perfect communist society, revolt against them, and force them to flee.

Suddenly, some of Stalin's Bodyguards show up, with the intent to kill you.
[6 for Marx, the Wizard / 1 - 1 = 0 for Stalin's Bodyguards]
They charge at you, but you simply command your Nanobots to enter their bodies.
The Nanobots make their way to the bodyguards brains, and take control of their bodies.

Quote from: Boris Borisov (sprinkled chariot)
Move submarine following the current course
  Captain Boris will not fail the people

[2 + 1 = 3: Minor Success]
You redirect the submarine towards the Capitalist America, and head fowards.

Quote from: Stalin (Rich McRichpants (ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES))
Surround myself with bodyguards and order the deaths of Marx and the would be an assassin, they know too much

[6: Overshot]
You tell your bodyguards to protect you, attack Marx, and attack the assassin, but that causes them to be spread too thin.

They will suffer a -1 deduction from their attack rolls

[1 - 1 = 0 for Stalin's Bodyguards / 6 for Marx, the Wizard]
The bodyguards find Marx, and attempt to kill him. However, he sends Nanobots into their bodies. The Nanobots make their way to the brain, and take over the bodyguards' bodies.

Dimitry reveals your deception to Stalin's Bodyguards, that you are actually a Capitalist Spy. The bodyguards turn on you.

Or at least, the ones you assigned to attacking Dimitry.

[6 - 1 = 5 for Stalin's Bodyguards / 4 - 1 = 3 for Stalin's Bodyguards (Traitorous)]
The Bodyguards Dimitry convinced attempt to attack Stalin, but are intercepted by the remaining Bodyguards assigned to protect him.
During the fued, both Dimitry and Stalin slipped away.

(-1 to next roll)

Quote from: Alekseyevich (Coolrune206)
Alekseyevich, satisfied, finds some other police stuffs to do.

[5 + 1 = 6: Overshot]
You notice a man talking to some Government Agents, but they seem to just laugh at what he says and drive off. You walk up to him and ask what the situation is.

He explains how there are kindergarteners at a school uprising, as they had Communism explained to them, but their feeble minds were unable to understand it. Instead, they started attacking each other, and even him.

You decide to be a hero, and go and stop the kindergartener uprising.

[1 for Alekseyevich / 2 for Kindergarteners]
A few minutes later, you exit the building.
There seems to be no stopping these violent kindergarteners.

Government Agents walk up to you and ask what is going on. You explain how you heard of the kindergartener uprising, and tried to stop it, but the Agents arrest you for attempting to do somebody else's job, as you are the owner of a potato farm, not a Government Agent.

Alekseyevich, the government has taken you into captivity. Your crimes are as follows: Attempting to do a job that was not assigned to you.

Quote from: Igor (Rockeater)
Igor, to prove he's a communist will share everything he have including information on other capitalists groups.

[3 - 1 = 2: Failure]
The Government Agents believe you to be lying, and throw you into the gulag.

That night, you hear some noise from the guard's room. Suddenly, a man comes out and starts opening all the cells, and telling everyone to run before the guards make it out.

You've escape from the gulag.

Quote from: Dimitry (King Zultan)
Tell the bodyguards that they're protecting a capitalist spy that has replaced the real Stalin.

[6 - 1 = 5: Major Success]
You explain to the Bodyguards that Stalin is actually not Stalin, and surprisingly, they believe you.

The Bodyguards attempt to attack Stalin.

[4 - 1 = 3 for Stalin's Bodyguards (Traitorous) / 6 - 1 = 5 for Stalin's Bodyguards]
The Bodyguards Dimitry convinced attempt to attack Stalin, but are intercepted by the remaining Bodyguards assigned to protect him.
During the fued, both Dimitry and Stalin slipped away.

(+1 to next roll)

Quote from: Imic
I go to visit Glorious Friend Stalin who loves you, to present him with a ruble as a present, and possibly start a fight with any Capitalist pigs I run into.

[5 + 1 = 6: Overshot]
You find Stalin as he's escaping while his Bodyguards fight... Each other?
What is going on? Could perfect Communist society be crumbling?
(-1 to next roll)



Spoiler: Recap (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Current Inventory (click to show/hide)
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The_Two_Eternities

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #50 on: September 12, 2018, 02:16:32 pm »

Keep investigating the rest of the facility.
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Roll to Multitask, seeking new players.
Yeah sorry, someone blew up a street in my state and took the internet down for multiple days with it.
This really happened. 2020 was wild.

Egan_BW

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #51 on: September 12, 2018, 02:27:43 pm »

"AHAHAHAHAH! NOW, MY MINIONS, LET US SIEZE THE MEMES OF PRODUCTION!"

Order my minions to sieze the memes of production.
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Down at the bottom of the ocean. Beneath tons of brine which would crush you down. Not into broken and splintered flesh, but into thin soup. Into just more of the sea water. Where things live that aren't so different from you, but you will never live to touch them and they will never live to touch you.

Rockeater

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #52 on: September 12, 2018, 02:30:29 pm »

Join a group of escaping capitalists and pretend to be one of them
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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

sprinkled chariot

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #53 on: September 12, 2018, 02:57:18 pm »

Run submarine silently to optimal place near U.S shore  for launching ballistic missiles by short trajectory

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Diaper or The Cow

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #54 on: September 12, 2018, 03:40:49 pm »

Seclusion is the only option left! I shall live in the mountains while gaining the knowledge necessary to destroy the capitalist conspiracy!

Imic

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #55 on: September 12, 2018, 03:41:32 pm »

Find out if his bpdyguards are really Communkst, or are in fact really just Capitalist pigs in disguise. If they are capitalidt pigs, or if they don’t fele like talking, or if they don’t stop fighting, or if Comrade Stalin is too far awayl kill the mocpst capitalist-looking of them.
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Imic's no longer allowed to vote.
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Well aren't you cheery
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Leodanny

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #56 on: September 12, 2018, 04:24:55 pm »

With our combined prisoner forces, create loads of vodka!
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ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #57 on: September 12, 2018, 04:28:27 pm »

Invoke the ancient spirit of capitalist greed to power me up to Marx level.
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Coolrune206

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #58 on: September 12, 2018, 07:26:57 pm »

Aha, nice try, Alekseyevich thinks. But this is glourious mother Russia, and we are good communists. Jobs are shared, sillies. Thus, he cannot be doing someone else's job; everyone's job is his job, and his job is everyone's.
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"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."

CABL

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Re: Roll to Communism
« Reply #59 on: September 13, 2018, 03:17:52 am »

Improvise by challenging the leader of the fish people to a wrestling match.
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Pounded in the Butt by my own Government... oh wait, that's real life.

Much less active than I used to be on these forums, but I still visit them on occasion. Will probably resume my activity in full once Dwarf Fortress will be released on Steam.
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