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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 473030 times)

A_Curious_Cat

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4785 on: September 16, 2022, 08:45:29 pm »

Today should implement electric bass (as in fish).
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Uthimienure

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4786 on: September 20, 2022, 03:40:23 am »

Add shrieking eels with sound effects... they always grow louder when they're about to feed on dwarven flesh!
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FPS in Gravearmor (850+ dwarves) is 3-6 (v0.47.05 lives on).
"I've never really had issues with the old DF interface (I mean, I loved even 'umkh'!)" ... brewer bob
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4787 on: September 21, 2022, 06:15:21 pm »

Dwarves can now summon giant rats by phrasing doubts about their existence.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

brewer bob

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4788 on: September 21, 2022, 06:24:40 pm »

Every time a giant rat is summoned a dwarf dies and an elf is born.

A_Curious_Cat

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4789 on: September 21, 2022, 06:57:27 pm »

All dwarves are reincarnated as elves when they die.
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King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4790 on: September 22, 2022, 01:13:10 am »

Everything is reincarnated as an elf after it dies.
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Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
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TheBeardyMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4791 on: September 22, 2022, 06:14:11 am »

Mangamancers. They make mangas that will corrupt your dwarves and make them weebs.
If your starting 7 dwarves are 1 male and 6 females, the game turns into a dating sim and you have to choose a waifu.
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brewer bob

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4792 on: September 22, 2022, 06:46:20 am »

Everything is reincarnated as an elf after it dies.

And dead elves reincarnate as fluffy wamblers.

Magmacube_tr

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4793 on: September 22, 2022, 08:06:21 am »

Three new professions are added. Actor, Director and Writer.

These dwarves make movies, producing projector film that can be used alone to watch the movie inside. Just don't ask how, like how you don't ask how dwarves roast stuff without fire and brew without water.

These movies are, of course, generated entirely procedurally, and almost all of them completely lack any real artistic value, and are only useful as cheap trade goods.
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muldrake

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4794 on: September 22, 2022, 08:32:11 am »

Three new professions are added. Actor, Director and Writer.

These dwarves make movies, producing projector film that can be used alone to watch the movie inside. Just don't ask how, like how you don't ask how dwarves roast stuff without fire and brew without water.

These movies are, of course, generated entirely procedurally, and almost all of them completely lack any real artistic value, and are only useful as cheap trade goods.
But I can already play America Simulator without even turning on a computer.

Okay, same idea.  Except while they create movies, including film reels, there are no actual film projectors in the game so they can't actually be watched.  They're just considered crazy people.  However, they will still demand guilds be built where they will Simulate Projector endlessly and pretend to be actually watching them, then they'll argue about what they imagine they just saw, leading to another more useless professions, Film Critic, Projectionist, Producer, Ticket Taker, Talent Agent, Popcorn Vendor, Gaffer, Best Boy, and others.

Allow these to continue existing and they will replace all other professions, leading to the death of the fort by starvation as no actually useful jobs get done.
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rico6822

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4795 on: September 22, 2022, 09:59:42 am »

Successful cure for removing [ALCOHOL_DEPENDENT] token.
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☼Obsidian Short Sword☼

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4796 on: September 22, 2022, 12:15:32 pm »

Batman crossover
« Last Edit: October 23, 2022, 02:58:13 pm by ☼Obsidian Short Sword☼ »
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The 10,000 Dwarf Challenge

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4797 on: September 22, 2022, 02:28:08 pm »

leading to another more useless professions, Film Critic, Projectionist, Producer, Ticket Taker, Talent Agent, Popcorn Vendor, Gaffer, Best Boy, and others.
All of these depend upon Social Skills. Though some require, and train towards, lower values.  But the Wrestler skill is needed for those taking the profession of Grip.

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muldrake

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4798 on: September 22, 2022, 06:28:08 pm »

Successful cure for removing [ALCOHOL_DEPENDENT] token.
Congrats you won the thread.
leading to another more useless professions, Film Critic, Projectionist, Producer, Ticket Taker, Talent Agent, Popcorn Vendor, Gaffer, Best Boy, and others.
All of these depend upon Social Skills. Though some require, and train towards, lower values.  But the Wrestler skill is needed for those taking the profession of Grip.
And of course there's the one actually useful film-related occupation:  Popcorn Maker.
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Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4799 on: September 22, 2022, 08:19:36 pm »

leading to another more useless professions, Film Critic, Projectionist, Producer, Ticket Taker, Talent Agent, Popcorn Vendor, Gaffer, Best Boy, and others.
All of these depend upon Social Skills. Though some require, and train towards, lower values.  But the Wrestler skill is needed for those taking the profession of Grip.
And of course there's the one actually useful film-related occupation:  Popcorn Maker.
Naturally. Without one of them, sufficiently trained, DF (and your whole OS!) quits at random times due to a kernel-error...
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