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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 463938 times)

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #795 on: September 05, 2019, 11:59:40 am »

If detailed reproduction becomes a thing, then as an obvious extension bards in worldgen should be able to write erotic literature.

'In 156, Urist Pantsanvil created "Elven Maidens of Treeflower" after a dream'.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #796 on: September 06, 2019, 07:24:37 am »

If detailed reproduction becomes a thing, then as an obvious extension bards in worldgen should be able to write erotic literature.

'In 156, Urist Pantsanvil created "Elven Maidens of Treeflower" after a dream'.
Something something plump helmet, something something flesh ball, something something giant sperm whale, etc.
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LexJackle

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #797 on: September 06, 2019, 10:13:25 am »

When you retire or save-quit, you get a list of all those in your fortress which have died or been injured and its compared with what a 'good player' should have gotten in similar circumstances (enemeies encountered vs minerals etc). This list is posted and updated online. Any particularly bad player is highlighted and shamed.

Dwarf fortress moves over to an invented runic language. This language is proceedually generated for each civ and world. Everything is in this language.
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #798 on: September 06, 2019, 10:46:19 am »

Procedurally-generated runes would actually be really awesome, though ideally there would be a translation available.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Blastbeard

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #799 on: September 06, 2019, 09:56:10 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
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I don't know how it all works, I just throw molten science at the wall and see what ignites.

BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #800 on: September 07, 2019, 01:00:10 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
Kobold stories are written in crude pictograms.  So crude, even the game doesn't understand them.

"This is a llama parchment scroll.  On the item are kobold pictograms.  First is...um...a dragon?  Or, like, an eggplant, maybe?  The second one's definitely a sword and shield.  Unless it's actually a tomato.... And that there's either a tall crown or a stubby celery stalk.  So, it's most likely describing either an epic tale or some kinda recipe.  Either way, it's utter shite."
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Urist McUristUrist

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #801 on: September 07, 2019, 05:19:14 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
Kobold stories are written in crude pictograms.  So crude, even the game doesn't understand them.

"This is a llama parchment scroll.  On the item are kobold pictograms.  First is...um...a dragon?  Or, like, an eggplant, maybe?  The second one's definitely a sword and shield.  Unless it's actually a tomato.... And that there's either a tall crown or a stubby celery stalk.  So, it's most likely describing either an epic tale or some kinda recipe.  Either way, it's utter shite."
Every single civilization starts at this level and has to evolve over time. Different races make progress at different speeds:
*Dwarves and goblins - 1.5x speed
*Humans - 1x speed
*Elves - 0.85x speed
*Kobolds -0.001x speed

If a world is old enough, words describing stuff like computers or chemistry might appear.
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #802 on: September 07, 2019, 06:28:24 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
Kobold stories are written in crude pictograms.  So crude, even the game doesn't understand them.

"This is a llama parchment scroll.  On the item are kobold pictograms.  First is...um...a dragon?  Or, like, an eggplant, maybe?  The second one's definitely a sword and shield.  Unless it's actually a tomato.... And that there's either a tall crown or a stubby celery stalk.  So, it's most likely describing either an epic tale or some kinda recipe.  Either way, it's utter shite."
Every single civilization starts at this level and has to evolve over time. Different races make progress at different speeds:
*Dwarves and goblins - 1.5x speed
*Humans - 1x speed
*Elves - 0.85x speed
*Kobolds -0.001x speed

If a world is old enough, words describing stuff like computers or chemistry might appear.
This actually sounds good, though I think animalmen might be able to be added
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Lunardog15

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #803 on: September 08, 2019, 01:25:01 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
Kobold stories are written in crude pictograms.  So crude, even the game doesn't understand them.

"This is a llama parchment scroll.  On the item are kobold pictograms.  First is...um...a dragon?  Or, like, an eggplant, maybe?  The second one's definitely a sword and shield.  Unless it's actually a tomato.... And that there's either a tall crown or a stubby celery stalk.  So, it's most likely describing either an epic tale or some kinda recipe.  Either way, it's utter shite."
Every single civilization starts at this level and has to evolve over time. Different races make progress at different speeds:
*Dwarves and goblins - 1.5x speed
*Humans - 1x speed
*Elves - 0.85x speed
*Kobolds -0.001x speed

If a world is old enough, words describing stuff like computers or chemistry might appear.
This actually sounds good, though I think animalmen might be able to be added
this would be really cool
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everything is fine
 everything is on fire
I see no difference between these two phrases.
only at modded hell does this make sense

Urist McUristUrist

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #804 on: September 10, 2019, 04:05:29 am »

Female birds can enter strange moods, requiering specific seeds to be supplied. If the mood fails, they go berserk. If the mood succeeds, a forgotten beast egg is laid and any future eggs laid by the bird are ☼eggs☼, which hatch into an entirely new procgen bird species.
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #805 on: September 10, 2019, 06:39:13 am »

Female birds can enter strange moods, requiering specific seeds to be supplied. If the mood fails, they go berserk. If the mood succeeds, a forgotten beast egg is laid and any future eggs laid by the bird are ☼eggs☼, which hatch into an entirely new procgen bird species.
This would be cool
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BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #806 on: September 10, 2019, 04:41:04 pm »

Female birds can enter strange moods, requiering specific seeds to be supplied. If the mood fails, they go berserk. If the mood succeeds, a forgotten beast egg is laid and any future eggs laid by the bird are ☼eggs☼, which hatch into an entirely new procgen bird species.
[cracking noises] "SKWONK!"
"So that's where they come from!"
Your fortress has crumbled to its end

But also, procgen birds raises the possibility for you to have an actual, literal Golden Goose.
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #807 on: September 10, 2019, 04:48:53 pm »

Female birds can enter strange moods, requiering specific seeds to be supplied. If the mood fails, they go berserk. If the mood succeeds, a forgotten beast egg is laid and any future eggs laid by the bird are ☼eggs☼, which hatch into an entirely new procgen bird species.
[cracking noises] "SKWONK!"
"So that's where they come from!"
Your fortress has crumbled to its end

But also, procgen birds raises the possibility for you to have an actual, literal Golden Goose.
And phoenixes/Moltres, Articuno, and Zapdos.
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #808 on: September 11, 2019, 09:57:47 am »

Pretty sure there's already at least one Pokémon mod out there, and phoenixes are included in quite a few mods. A golden goose could presumably be modded as well (though it might take a bit of work).
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MachoNacho

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #809 on: September 12, 2019, 05:57:19 pm »

RNG then leads to only one translation existing in the world, currently stored in a roc's nest. After retrieving the translation, you discover you cannot read it due to the fact it was written by a kobold shortly before the roc paid a visit to its cave. Thus begins your quest to find a translation for the translation.

Kobolds should compose works, and these should be absolute gibberish, yet still somehow convey their meaning to the viewer. Or not, it's funnier if you can't tell wether a poem concerns the seasons or that time a roc visited the kobold cave and only some of them died instead of all of them.
Kobold stories are written in crude pictograms.  So crude, even the game doesn't understand them.

"This is a llama parchment scroll.  On the item are kobold pictograms.  First is...um...a dragon?  Or, like, an eggplant, maybe?  The second one's definitely a sword and shield.  Unless it's actually a tomato.... And that there's either a tall crown or a stubby celery stalk.  So, it's most likely describing either an epic tale or some kinda recipe.  Either way, it's utter shite."
Every single civilization starts at this level and has to evolve over time. Different races make progress at different speeds:
*Dwarves and goblins - 1.5x speed
*Humans - 1x speed
*Elves - 0.85x speed
*Kobolds -0.001x speed

If a world is old enough, words describing stuff like computers or chemistry might appear.
Kobolds advance as fast as whatever race they're stealing shit from.
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