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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 464162 times)

Criperum

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2385 on: October 16, 2020, 08:54:41 am »

I'd like Toady to read this topic and actually implement some of the worst suggestions just to mess with players.
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A_Curious_Cat

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2386 on: October 16, 2020, 10:33:27 am »

Toady One should implement a special event (either in worldgen or possibly afterwords -in which case your fort/adventurer could possibly compete-)  in which athletes from around the world would gather at a single place and run to grab a single thread (of material that would be chosen procedurally) from somewhere far away and bring it back to the place where they started.  This event would, of course, be known as the Great Thread Race.
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Really hoping somebody puts this in their signature.

Bumber

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2387 on: October 16, 2020, 03:38:22 pm »

Toady could also implement multithreading, where each athlete gets their own thread. Race conditions are also added.
« Last Edit: October 16, 2020, 03:42:02 pm by Bumber »
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2388 on: October 16, 2020, 03:45:08 pm »

Four philosophers join each fortress as combine noble-position holders. They demand exactly four forks to be created, four plates and one huge vessel of spaghetti that gets placed on their communal table. They then each try to eat.
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muldrake

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2389 on: October 16, 2020, 04:09:36 pm »

Dwarves themselves get to make terrible suggestions, which are then immediately implemented into the game.
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nezclaw

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2390 on: October 16, 2020, 06:58:49 pm »

Change the game entirely to serve its newer, better challenge mode: Build rockets from stock parts.
Refocus off dwarves, not noted for their love of open space, never mind the outer kind, and onto a more pliant core civilisation.
Obviously you'd need to rename it "Kobold Space Program".
late, but i know i've made this suggestion before ;D
Dwarves manufacture the parts, and since they know absolutely nothing about rocketry the parts can and will explode randomly.

The above, except, instead of "manga", "magma".
i made a post on tumblr to the effect of "maybe i should just fill my library with magma" and didnt tag it DF and someone asked if i meant manga

A mystical and mythical character that appears in folks art like songs and stories etc. but has no reference in legends but still being completely real. sometimes it pops up in random places and makes your dwarves shit their pants. Nothing can stop it. Unless you get rid of all mentions. The more mentions the more powerful it becomes.

Awesome idea. Really. It could work in some worlds where ideas create reality. So people would invent their spirits and gods and they would really start to exist. People create worlds by writing. Anyone remember the Myst and Riven games?
Dwarves can now go into moods and craft Descriptive Books, which allow them to travel to other worlds and found forts there. They have yet to figure out how to craft Linking Books, so once they use the Descriptive Book they're gone.

wait no they can make linking books but there's only a 3% chance they'll make one during a mood instead of a Descriptive Book

I want music!
I want my mayor not able to fall asleep without some lulling lute playing in the background. I want dwarfs in neighbouring quarters not able to sleep because of the racket. I want instrument playing professions, talents. I want travelling orchestras and choirs. I want poets and poems written down in books. I want battle songs increasing morale of dwarves charging the enemy. But most of all I want tavern full of dwarves impulsively break into drinking songs.
this is the terrible suggestions thread
« Last Edit: October 16, 2020, 07:00:34 pm by nezclaw »
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Dawnthunder: It menaces with spikes of tetanus
After the fire had burned down all of the wooden next boxes on the surface, Mottled Petrel was reluctant to replace them with more wooden nest boxes. Instead, he placed the remaining store of wooden nest boxes in the dormitory for any aspiring koopa mothers.

The nest boxes were immediately overrun by helmet snakes.

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2391 on: October 17, 2020, 04:32:43 am »

In order to confuse people we should post all good ideas in this thread and all the terrible ones DF Suggestions.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

delphonso

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2392 on: October 17, 2020, 05:12:32 am »

In order to confuse people we should post all good ideas in this thread and all the terrible ones DF Suggestions.

I see you have already started this. +1

Urist McUristUrist

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2393 on: October 17, 2020, 05:18:07 pm »

Hedgehog men are hostile towards all histfigs who are legendary in at least one skill related to engineering and wear red clothes.
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Egan_BW

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2394 on: October 17, 2020, 07:19:33 pm »

Only the fake ones.
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Down at the bottom of the ocean. Beneath tons of brine which would crush you down. Not into broken and splintered flesh, but into thin soup. Into just more of the sea water. Where things live that aren't so different from you, but you will never live to touch them and they will never live to touch you.

BlueManedHawk

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2395 on: October 17, 2020, 11:05:54 pm »

Guns
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How do i use sigtext properly?

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2396 on: October 18, 2020, 06:23:33 am »

If your fort isn't up to the standards of some dwarves they can leave while yelling that they're going out to build their own fort with black jack and hookers.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

delphonso

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2397 on: October 18, 2020, 06:47:03 am »

Dwarves develop martial arts and request dojos similar to guild halls. Dwarves will challenge martial arts guilds of different types in the fort. Occasionally, goblin martial arts guilds will arrive and challenge your guilds.

If your fort isn't up to the standards of some dwarves they can leave while yelling that they're going out to build their own fort with black jack and hookers.

Bendwarf.

Azerty

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2398 on: October 18, 2020, 01:41:06 pm »

Hedgehog men are hostile towards all histfigs who are legendary in at least one skill related to engineering and wear red clothes.

And sometimes, these hedgehog men will wear blue and be helped by orange two-tail foxmen.
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"Just tell me about the bits with the forest-defending part, the sociopath part is pretty normal dwarf behavior."

betaking

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2399 on: October 18, 2020, 02:57:50 pm »

Four philosophers join each fortress as combine noble-position holders. They demand exactly four forks to be created, four plates and one huge vessel of spaghetti that gets placed on their communal table. They then each try to eat.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: October 18, 2020, 03:41:16 pm by betaking »
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