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Author Topic: MOOK: And stay out!  (Read 121345 times)


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Re: MOOK: Minutes without an accident: 0
« Reply #195 on: February 03, 2019, 12:08:32 am »

Welp, this isn't extranatural shenanigans and thus someone else's problem. Head back to the barracks and get some sleep.

Clem wanders a bit, trying to find the barracks again. This time it wanders into the breakroom and finds Jon shouting down the laserhole.

It remarks to itself that "Shouting down the laserhole" is a good euphemism for something, but it isn't sure what.

Spoiler: HAZMAT Harry, HMRC (click to show/hide)

Now you see this, people? This is why we send the HMRC into situations like this, they're properly equipped and even more properly disposable I mean, trained.

Pull the switch with all my switch-pulling ability.
Harry changes position and tries to jerk the switch down in giant, highly exaggerated tugging motions. It fails to move more than maybe an inch.

Go out into the hall, feed the laser dog more meatloaf. If he lasers again, clamp his mouth shut and stuff him into my incinerator. Otherwise go into the cubicle farm and start cleaning up.Put out any fires the plasma stared, using my mop. Laser squeegee any scorch marks on the wals where the plasma went through, both incoming and outgoing. Toss any loose articles from desks, wastepaper baskets, coat racks etc into the incinerator.

"Whistle while you work~ Phtphbthbbbphthb THB THB THB!~".

Spoiler: Character Sheet (click to show/hide)
Jon walks back to the dog box and, lacking anymore meatloaf, gives the pup a liberal dollop of nutrient paste. He drops the empty tube into the incinerator and then walks back to the cubicle farm. He begins carefully tracing the path of the laser, cleaning up things that need cleaning. He almost immediately comes to the cubicle that appears to have an active computer in it. It does indeed have an active computer, and next to that computer is a desk chair and about 2/3rds of a former employee with a nice neat semicircle cut out of his upper body/head region. There's a bit of neck and head left, a scrap of it hanging limp, which Jon pokes with his mop before shrugging and loading the corpse into the incinerator.  As it burns down, he busies himself completing the game of OMNITECH Galactic Pinball the man was playing on the pc.

That doesn't sound very pleasant. Getting a bit further wouldn't hurt.

Follow my janitor friend into the cubicle farm. Check the computer for anything interesting. Hopefully it's not filled to the brim with spam and porn.

After losing his last ball Jon loses interest in the PC and Pathos comes in to search it.
Pathos boots up the command line for the server and then tries to remember the right commands. After a moment of thinking he nods to himself and types "rm -rf /*". The computer holds for a moment, and then maybe thirty seconds later goes dark. Huh.

Go help flip that switch!

Should we manage that, return to the teleporter room and return to goop gun s.o.p., aka goop ape if it goes bananas.

Spoiler: Jion Maupin (click to show/hide)
Jion follows the path the others took moments earlier and heads up into the cramped confines of the upper teleporter mechanics chamber. He sees Harry struggling to flip the switch and immediately runs to help.
The two of them together manage to push the switch halfway to closed, but not all the way.

Jane-Anne walks up into the teleporter room, looking confused.

Attempt to assist with any dog-handling related tasks, from a safe distance.
Spoiler: Jane-Anne Warren (click to show/hide)
Jane-Anne, who is a lot like Jane and Anne but if they got into a horrible teleporter accident, walks right back out of the room and into the hall. She proceeds to stare at the dog cage from a good, reasonably safe distance while making what she hopes are reassuring noises for the dog.

Roald Baccam, Accidental Workplace Related Death Due to Lack of Caution, and see about any Will. Also File the Paperwork for someone to come transport the dog to a secure testing facility storage room, retroactively, so it gets done now..

File a Theft of Company Property complaint form for the stolen gun they took without the proper paperwork.

Read about Galaxy Law.

You guys are aware Roald got electrocuted up in the crawlspaces and hollows of the ceiling right? If you're not in there with him, you can't see him and thus in character should have no idea he's dying.

Also, no sheet, no action. Get it together, Lisa, if that is your real name.

Spoiler: medic n°2 (click to show/hide)

Escape the possible danger Go with the guys that just exited the room (Harry, Roald, and Patrick), you know just in case one is hurt and needs a doctor

Steve follows Jion up into the ceiling and immediately catches sight of Roald laying in a smoldering pile against the wall. [7] Through CPR and a rather huge dose of Epinephrine Steve gets Roald's heart out of flatline, but Roald is still a crispy critter and both of his arms look like well done steaks. Luckily he's not conscious or he would definitely be complaining.

Stay in cover and keep my gun aimed at the teleporter.
Spoiler: Heather Reid (click to show/hide)
Heather [This post has been Censored by OMNITECH for its gratuitous boxosexual content] and then keeps her gun pointed at the teleporter.

Was not the company barbecue next weekend?

Investigate this smell of flesh.

Spoiler: Qualt (click to show/hide)

Qualt heads up the ladder into the ceiling and immediately comes upon Roald and Steve. [7] Qualt takes over as Steve works on getting Roald stabilized, bandaging the man's half melted arms and numerous other electrical burns. Chances are he won't be able to keep the arms but Qualt does his best regardless.

Keep rifle trained on teleporter.
and for the record it’s not theft, I was merely preventing the destruction of company propert.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Lance keeps his weapon trained on the teleporter.

Hmm. Where does that phrase come from, he wonders. To keep something "Trained on" something else?  Its kind of nonsensical sounding, now that he thinks of it.

Follow Steve/Medic n°2 to the guys whoe xited the room. Wait for him to assess wether or not the guy who get electrocuted is dead or not.
- If the guy is alive, just go stand in the hallway and faff about. listen to some tunes or something while the rest of team is busy making a mess for me to clean up.
- If he is dead (like for real dead. Player has to make a new character kind of dead), relieve him of his sidearm and toolkit (can't be destroying company proprety here), then feed his corpse into the incinerator. Then go faff about in the hallway and listen to some tunes.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Ed pokes his head up into the crawlspace after the two medics.

"HEY! Is tall, dark, and crispy over there dead or just deadish?"

"He's still alive, for now." Steve shouts back.


Ed climbs back down and sets his newly stolen legal pad to play some muzak.

Spoiler: Redshirt (click to show/hide)
As he considered the current situation, he had to decide between his mission and filling out that paperwork, FINALLY. he decided to split the difference, and Go to the designated lab, and ask a local rep for form R3-5PWN, the one you fill out to keep at least SOME of your stuff each time you die.
Redshirt wanders in and asks Lisa for the R3-5PWN paperwork. She frowns and starts digging through her contract notebook.

"That doesn't exist." she says, after a few minutes.

Just... slip away, I guess. Or not; not is awesome too. Better, even. Why don't I do that instead?
In the depths of his mind, Roald mentally goes over the importance of electrical safety.

"I'll be over there, scouting and providing support, if you need me."
Find some place far away from the teleporter and hide.

Ed (no the other one) tries to think about the best way to avoid the teleporter's wrath. At first he considers running far away, but then realizes that is exactly what the teleporter wants! A running target, a nice back to put a knife in. No, no, can't do that. Have to trick it. Have to play it smart.  He runs straight up to the teleporter and plasters himself across it, hugging the tube with both arms and both legs like a very desperate lover.

Stroll down the hall (maybe to that breakroom?) and see if I can rustle up some treats to keep the dog happy.
Mildred wanders out into the hall and follows the sound of Pathos swearing until she finds the break room. The fridge is a puddle so she checks the pantry.
[6] There's a box of muffins in there so she grabs it and heads back to the dog, sitting down next to the cage and waiting to hand in little bits to it.

Shoot the ape if there's any good reason to do so, which is pretty much guaranteed.

In other words: Shoot the ape.

Spoiler: Sheet (click to show/hide)
Rezel points his weapon at the tube and waits, intent on shooting the ape as soon as it materializes. [4] He immediately reconsiders when he thinks that the "glass" might actually high density acrylic and bounce the round off harmlessly. Best to wait for it to move up.

Up in the ceiling, all three switches suddenly slam into the on position for maybe a second before slamming back down into the closed position like a bear trap. Harry sees it coming and dodges away, but Jion doesn't. [3v8] The switches , each at least 4 feet tall, slam down on him like a wire egg cutter. The results several pinched off chunks of former Engineer.

Meanwhile, downstairs, the timer hits zero and the tube begins its usual dance of bright lights and loud noise. After a few seconds an ape is standing in the tube. It looks like an Orangutan, all plump, orange and strangely sympathetic looking. As soon as the tube retracts Rezel opens fire. However, instead of a dead ape, when the smoke clears there is something very odd.  The Orangutan is standing up on its stubby little legs, well on one stubby leg, and has its arms posed up around and behind its head in a way that can only be described as extremely flamboyant. Around it are what look like after images of it, made out of the rainbow shimmer off an oil puddle. They're all in poses of their own, each holding one of the bullets from Rezel's shots.  The main ape looks at Rezel with a floppy lipped smirk.

"やれやれだぜ "


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« Reply #196 on: February 03, 2019, 12:19:34 am »

Walk out from behind the corner, see the rainbow ape.

Then start clapping my hands and acting obviously elated, with non-agressive body language.  Hopefully I can keep the orangutan entertained while someone else gets some food ready.

Spoiler: Spuds (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: February 03, 2019, 02:28:15 am by Devastator »

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« Reply #197 on: February 03, 2019, 12:44:07 am »

”Somebody want to get this guy a banana!”
Lower my rifle and assume a non-aggressive stance.
“...I’m serious, we should try to be diplomatic here.”
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I only ate a few vampire hearts. Like, three tops. I'm sure it'll be fine.

Go check out Shadow of the Void!


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« Reply #198 on: February 03, 2019, 12:46:47 am »

Hug the rifle, curl up in a ball behind cover, and hope to not die.

Spoiler: Sheet (click to show/hide)


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Re: MOOK: All I want for Christmas...
« Reply #199 on: February 03, 2019, 12:58:59 am »

"Thanks for killing that compute for me, Pathos. I think it was cheating at pinball. Hey, did you remember to delete this guy's porn folder first?

Oh, that sounds like gunfire. I guess they got started in the teleporter room again. Pull up the feed on your datapad, would ya?"

Rifle through the dead guy's desk for goodies, which Jon will share with Pathos. Watch the teleporter shenanigans on Pathos' datapad for now.

Spoiler: Character Sheet (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: February 03, 2019, 04:34:30 am by Ozarck »

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« Reply #200 on: February 03, 2019, 04:30:40 am »

Keep my rifle pointed at the monkey just in case it turns out to be hostile.
Spoiler: Character Sheet (click to show/hide)
The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?


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« Reply #201 on: February 03, 2019, 04:51:35 am »

"I cannot abide cheating. Speaking of-"

Initiate the teleporter send sequence. See if I can trap the data in a loop to store it for later. If that's not possible, then try to Target something that won't be missed. Like the Sun.

If this teleporter can't send, initiate the teleporter receive sequence and feed it random high frequency and high energy noise. Either it kills the ape which means I did a good job or it makes things go horribly wrong which means I win the bet!

If the ape has already left the tube or that doesn't stop it then think about what could and yell that information to the others. Maybe I could design a device that suppresses the ape's powers? Maybe I could do whatever happened to the ape to one of them?

« Last Edit: February 04, 2019, 08:41:48 am by Parisbre56 »


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« Reply #202 on: February 03, 2019, 05:31:00 am »

Spoiler: medic n°2 (click to show/hide)

See if there is anything else I can do to treat Ronald open a medical kit for this.

Also tell Eddrick that someone just died up here.

GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.


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« Reply #203 on: February 03, 2019, 08:23:36 am »

Edd stashes away his contract notebook when he hears Steve yelling about a dead man.

"Hey dude, thanks for the heads up. Good luck with mister crispy over there, by the way."

Swoop in to nick reclaim Jion's items as per company policy. Then feed his corpse to my incinerator. Also use the automop to clean up the blood and other assorted giblets.

Spoiler: Eddrick, Sanitation (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: February 03, 2019, 09:02:46 am by Pancaek »


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« Reply #204 on: February 03, 2019, 08:54:05 am »

Good enough, get some rest.


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« Reply #205 on: February 03, 2019, 12:51:40 pm »


If I can act this turn, then return to the plan we used with the dog: offer it some food, but try not to let it touch me directly. Also be horrified by the OSHA standards around here.

Spoiler: Yagyu d'Aubigny (click to show/hide)

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21:26   <XYZ>: I know nothing about this, but I have strong opinions about it.
Fucking hell, you guys are worse than the demons.

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« Reply #206 on: February 03, 2019, 02:47:05 pm »

Follow spuds. Be ready to clean the monkey.

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Never ever cease communication with your enemies, never ever cease interaction with them, never isolate yourself from them. Never ignore them, relish the time to deal with them, to exercise banter. The biggest mistake one can make is ignoring one's enemies. Go out of your way to pick a fight today.


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« Reply #207 on: February 03, 2019, 03:30:15 pm »

"Could someone unimportant get that ape contained already?"

Wait for someone to get inevitably injured within the next few minutes, then apply medicine to them.
Spoiler: Heather Reid (click to show/hide)


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Re: MOOK: Days without an accident: 0
« Reply #208 on: February 03, 2019, 04:37:49 pm »

So I was clinging to the teleporter tube. Then the ape was teleported and the tube retracted. Then the someone shot the ape, the ape discovered it's Stand and started posing and caught all the bullets.

So where the hell am I??? Did I flee the tube and join the crowd of idiots when the alarms went off? Am I somehow still clinging to the tube under the floor or above the ceiling? Am I hugging the posing ape? Am I lying on the floor bleeding from several new superfluous bullet wounds? AAAAAAAHHH!

Find out what the heck just happened.

« Last Edit: February 03, 2019, 04:39:35 pm by NAV »
Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.


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« Reply #209 on: February 04, 2019, 03:19:11 am »

Jane-Anne continues to stare at the dog in mildly-contained terror. Nursing school had not prepared her for this.

Continue assisting in the pacification of the dog.

Spoiler: Jane-Anne Warren (click to show/hide)
Ain't nobody got time for that.
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