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Author Topic: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm  (Read 46836 times)

QuQuasar

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Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« on: March 01, 2019, 07:27:40 pm »

Breadbowl III, The Breadening



Artist: Hydrocyanide
Left to right: Blackchibisan, Sanctume, Superdorf, SQman, Splint, Zuglarkun, Gchristopher, Auze, Immortal-D, Quasar, Lordy



The war had dragged on for an unknowable number of years. Citadel after citadel had fallen, leaving the Dwarven Kingdom of The North Syrup in ruins. Eventually, the last of dwarvenkind retreated to the Deepholds, sealed and self-sustaining fortresses beneath the magma sea. They left only a small population of ~30 dwarves to guard the hidden entrance, a hillocks called Anklemine, and resolved to abandon the surface world entirely,
 
Well... almost entirely. As it turns out, the cumulative psychological toll of eating nothing but rubbery cat-piss plump helmets is slowly but surely fatal to any dwarven society. Generations after the retreat, the Deepholds teetered on the very brink of collapse. Dwarves tantrumed, lashed out, toppled statues, and generally made complete and utter nuisances of themselves.
 
And so seven specialists gathered, and set for themselves a mission: for the sake of all dwarvenkind, they would sneak back up to the surface-world and risk the attention of hostile elves and goblins in order to construct a farm, hidden away in a valley in the untamed wilds, tasked to produce as much variety, quantity and quality of food as possible. The dwarves would once again dine upon food grown in the light.



This will be a simple 2-week 1-year succession fort with a goal: export as much quantity and variety of food and drink as possible.

RULES
         
* Trade all your food and drink to every caravan.
- After every trade, you should have no prepared food or drink left.
 - The humans are considered couriers delivering to the Mountainhome.


* Report the value of food and drink you trade each time.
- Trade food and drink seperately, so you can see the export value of each. We can divide that by the average cost of a roast/barrel to get trade quantities.
- Our goal is to beat Breadbowl's record: 9000 food, 14000 drink.

* No buying food from the caravan.
         
* Underground crops are not allowed.
 - Enclosed crops (aboveground crops underneath some sort of roof) are allowed, on the condition that the roof be made of clear or crystal glass.
 - Magmaponic crops (multi-level crops grown on muddied cast-obsidian) are allowed, but must be built above the aquifer.

* Handover takes place at the Start Of Winter
-  This prevents the next overseer’s export trade score from unfairly benefiting from food grown by the previous overseer during the winter season.


More Rules
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

OVERSEERS
aka. Turn List

Year 1: Quasar - Return to the Surface

Traded: 155 food (9006☼), 519 drink (1689☼)

Year 2: Sanctume - A Slice of Cheesesplatter

Traded: 688 food (89,935☼), 1,437 drinks (10,713☼)

Year 3: DwarvenLord - Gods and Gold

Traded: ≈1188 food (155,368☼), ≈3631 drinks (27,071☼)

Year 4: Superdorf - War and Stress

Traded: ≈680 food (77,165☼), ≈2850 drinks (21,757 ☼)
Dwarven caravan driven away by Cardinals


Year 5: Pikachu17 - In Progress

Traded:

Year 6: Immortal-D

Traded:

Year 6: Whoever grabs it next!



DWARF LIST

You may be redorfed after death, but you'll need to come up with a new name.  No resurrections, body-hopping or suspiciously similar distant cousins please.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 21, 2019, 08:49:44 pm by QuQuasar »
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QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #1 on: March 01, 2019, 07:28:04 pm »

Quotable Quotes

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: April 05, 2019, 02:18:45 am by QuQuasar »
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QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #2 on: March 01, 2019, 07:54:03 pm »

Embark

Greetings all. I am "Quasar". I will be team leader and Specialist Zero-One (cooking) on our upcoming mission.
 
I don't need to tell you all the importance of this expedition. The Deepholds have been sealed away for as long as any living dwarf can remember, and though they remain safe and self-sustaining, the psychological effects of being isolated in our unassailable, airtight fortresses are taking their toll. We are gradually losing a war of attrition against stress. Tantrums, madness and violations of production orders are all on the rise. Thanks to this.
 
[Quasar holds up a common Plump Helmet for all to see]
 
This is our enemy. It provides nourishment, but at a cost. And now, that cost is killing us. Our civilization can no longer sustain itself on plump helmet roasts and wine, and so our mission is to see to it that it no longer has to.
 
We will infiltrate the surface world and establish a foothold for the production of edible and potable foodstuffs. Further assistance will be deployed from the Deepholds upon word of our success.
 
The embark location our scouts have identified, Site-A, is a hidden valley deep in the untamed wilds. It is adjacent to a small watercourse and on the edge of a [ahem] "Foor-est", and reportedly offers fertile soil for most brewable and cookable surface crops, which will be essential for our primary mission.
 

 


Team members
 
Specialist 01, (Cooking). Codename: "Quasar".
Specialist 02, (Crop tending). Codename: "SQman"
Specialist 03, (Fermentation, Medicine). Codename: "Lordy"
Specialist 04, (Herbalism). Codename: "Immortal-D"
Specialist 05, (Pot Making). Codename: "Superdorf"
Specialist 06, (Smithing). Codename: "Auze"
Specialist 07, (Elimination of Threats). Codename: "Sanctume"



We have arrived. The journey was made arduous by the fact that none of us had ever seen the surface world before, but at this point the effects of cave sickness have mostly subsided and the blinding light of the sky is no longer incapacitating.
 

 
Initial assessment: site A is much as described. Brook is present, shallow and easily forded. There are "Tree" entities present in significant numbers, but according to the encyclopedia we compiled from available historical information prior to leaving the Deephold, they are immobile and harmless, akin to mushrooms. Supposedly, many varieties produce edible and brewable growths. However, I tasted a few of their "Leaves" on the journey out here. So far, not impressed. Perhaps they taste better cooked.
 

 
Our journey was made in disguise: rather than being outfitted in the highest quality armour of our dwarven mountainhome, we traveled in rags and presented ourselves as human rock-sellers of unusual stature. A clever ruse! Of course, the "rocks" we are carrying are in actual fact the ores we need for Specialist Zero-Six, 'Auze' to make bronze tools, armour and weapons once we arrive. We have no intention of selling them.
 
Luckily, we did not meet anyone on the journey except for the allied humans the mountainhome commissioned to carry our produce annually to a supply drop in the vicinity of the Deephold's secret entrance. They provided us with a collection of above-ground "seeds", (spawn for surface world crops) to aid in our mission.
 


After discussion with Specialist Zero-Five, "Superdorf" who knows a little about architecture, we have an overall plan for the settlement. Production chains will begin with farm plots, pastures and what the surfaceworlders call "orch-hards" from the edge of the site, and will flow inwards towards the Trade Depot in the center, which will reduce hauling requirements.
 
We can use the flesh of the tree creatures in place of shroomwood, for bins and construction materials. We will forge an axe and begin the culling promptly.
« Last Edit: March 17, 2019, 02:41:43 am by QuQuasar »
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QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2019, 08:19:02 pm »

SQman adopted the position of woodcutter to cut down the trees that do not produce edible food. According to the encyclopedia, these are "Larch", "Tea Tree", "Willow" and "Mahogany".

Santume has decided to temporarily forgo martial training to assist us in reshaping the terrain. I, meanwhile, took up carpentry: my cooking skills are useless until we have bed and a dining hall.

Over our heads fly flocks of monsters indigenous to the surface world. They have blood-red feathers, talons, and squid-like beaks with which to rend our flesh, but they keep their distance, for now. Nevertheless, I fear for our safety, and am grateful for the leather armour and bronze spears provided by Auze. Should these so-called "Wrens", "Cardinals", "Hornbills" and "Masked Lovebirds" attack, we will not be defenseless.



One thing I recognized is a colony of insects in the north-west: honeybees, I believe! Even after generations in the deep, dwarvenkind has not forgotten the taste of honey! It would be a truly great thing to supply the deepholds with honey, but there is only one bee colony in the area, and we are yet vulnerable, so we shall be cautious for now and leave the bees alone.





Start of summer

We have carved a small place for ourselves and begun the production of food (specifically a number of "beer-ey vines", as these were among the easier specimens to grow), but there is much yet to do.





Word of our successful embarkment has reached the deephold. They have sent additional specialists, and an unusually useful group at that: 6 adult dwarves, and two children.



One skilled armourer (with, as a bonus, some skill with an axe), two "fisherdwarves" with surprisingly useful supplementary skills (cooking and wood burning, respectively), a tanner, a thresher, and a peasant who will take over Santume's position as the local miner.



We have discovered the height of the water table. There are two levels of dry soil between us and it. Not much space, but enough for storage cellars at least.



The trees are... unexpectedly beautiful. They have been producing flowers, and some have begun growing the edible "fruit" I read about. The shrubland has been dried up in the heat, however, and has turned yellow.

I have constructed two stepladders for the acquisition of these fruit. We will taste them and, if nobody dies, forward them on to the deepholds.

auzewasright

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2019, 08:54:27 pm »

To: Specialist 06, goes by "Auze"
From: The
*take deep breath* bureaucratic bureaucrat's bureau of the bureaucrat's bureaucratic bureaucracy - administrative administration class - project division
File under: projects, renaming, fortress, agriculture, misnomers, names (non-indicative section), legend, scholar, smith (of metal type)



Greetings Auze,

We are pleased to notice that the project is going well, despite the lack of time to prepare. We are happy to inform you that your position in official files has allowed us to grant you the name/title of "Scholar Auze", which is the recorded naming precedent for the position of "First registered scholar in an above-ground farming fortress". As this title has not been used since times of legend that predate all but the most basic surviving writing, (as you know, most known writing was destroyed in the great collapse thought to be caused by a plague of were-pigs) you should take this with pride and hope that your name is carried down the annals of history. However, it should be noted that the title is required to be at least partially non-indicative, and that you have at least one unrelated major job. In conclusion, we are pleased to see that you already fit this requirement, with most of your work being done not in scholarly, but instead in blacksmithery.

Sincerely, The bureaucratic bureaucrat's bureau of the bureaucrat's bureaucratic bureaucracy - administrative administration class - project division
« Last Edit: March 02, 2019, 09:02:08 pm by auzewasright »
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On a fun note, all of the beds just starting disintegrating
By the way, it (my name) is pronounced "ah-zee".

SQman

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2019, 04:28:38 pm »

Only two children in the first migration wave, and no giant hamsters in sight for a whole season. This fort is already looking good.

DwarvenLord

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #6 on: March 03, 2019, 04:47:20 pm »

Could we get a turn list? Or is the dwarf list also the turn list?
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And thus was the dwarven meatshield invented.
the child should serve well in the infantry (that is a horrible pun, and I already regret saying it).

Immortal-D

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #7 on: March 03, 2019, 07:59:45 pm »

Your writeup actually made me chuckle :)  I am quite struck with the idea that Dwarves no longer recognize most things on the surface, learning as they go.  Reminds me of Gemclod, where they identified and/or madeup names for stuff as they encountered it.

QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #8 on: March 03, 2019, 10:45:56 pm »

Could we get a turn list? Or is the dwarf list also the turn list?
Added. A couple people asked for later turns so I had to take a bit of time to sort the order out.

To: Specialist 06, goes by "Auze"
From: The
*take deep breath* bureaucratic bureaucrat's bureau of the bureaucrat's bureaucratic bureaucracy - administrative administration class - project division
Looks like I chose the right person to be the bookkeeper. :)

Only two children in the first migration wave, and no giant hamsters in sight for a whole season. This fort is already looking good.
Yup, no hamsters, just birds. Giant birds. Flocks of giant birds, hungry for dwarven flesh.

Your writeup actually made me chuckle :)  I am quite struck with the idea that Dwarves no longer recognize most things on the surface, learning as they go.  Reminds me of Gemclod, where they identified and/or madeup names for stuff as they encountered it.
I've been reading the SCP Foundation Wiki and the original gimmick was going to be that everything was new to them, and it would basically be the Exploration Log of an alien species visiting earth for the first time. That got silly quick and didn't square with them knowing which trees to cut down and what honey bees were, so they've got an encylopedia and a bit of cultural memory from the time when dwarves walked the surface.

QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #9 on: March 04, 2019, 04:56:44 am »

By the way, Sanctume: handover takes place at winter. Do you want me to give you the first winter of Cheesesplatter, or take the first winter for myself to get the place fully set up and start you off at the beginning of the second winter?

I don't mind either way.

Sanctume

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #10 on: March 04, 2019, 01:49:49 pm »

I'm fine either way.  If you feel like cranking out 1 more year, that's cool. 

I'll be glad to take first winter too, being suspicious that some were-ass is freezing and will come visit on spring thaw.

gchristopher

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #11 on: March 04, 2019, 04:36:21 pm »

- Hydroponic crops (multiple level of muddied glass) are allowed and even encouraged for maximum efficiency.
Looking at the rules, IIRC, you can't "hydroponic" farm on constructed floors. Fortunately, you can do it on obsidian cast onto tiles that were previously exposed to surface light, then dug back out and muddied.
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QuQuasar

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #12 on: March 04, 2019, 05:01:45 pm »

- Hydroponic crops (multiple level of muddied glass) are allowed and even encouraged for maximum efficiency.
Looking at the rules, IIRC, you can't "hydroponic" farm on constructed floors. Fortunately, you can do it on obsidian cast onto tiles that were previously exposed to surface light, then dug back out and muddied.
Removed.

gchristopher

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #13 on: March 05, 2019, 01:29:20 am »

Oh, I was thinking you could allow Magmaponics on obsidian instead of Hydroponics. That's more challenging and risky than clear glass, even. (Though, with a magma stack, you could argue that it's too scalable to fill a big pit with obsidian.) I hope you have a map-wide aquifer! That'd increase the cost of such shenanigans.
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Splint

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Re: Cheesesplatter: A Succession Farm
« Reply #14 on: March 05, 2019, 10:18:39 am »

A PTW. I've seen the other two forts but never kept up with them, but this gave me a good chuckle and between it and Honeystoker, an idea for a project that I'll need to do a bit of modding for.

Here's hoping you guys can break the record.
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