Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 19th of Sandstone 179While the freshly rescued rainbow raptors are busy getting their paperwork in order, I paid another visit to the Arena to enjoy the bloodbath of goblins vs elves vs traitors vs wildlife. By Armok the stink in there was worse than the years the giant was in there before I mangled its sorry corpse.
Apropos of the arena: despite it being here for 17 years, this arena has only had one previous bout. Goblin vs the zombie giant and it was that goblin who left the steel equipment in the arena. The goblin barely lasted a few minutes. I remember that match quite well for it was one of the first things I did in Smallhands- enjoy the goblin slaughter.
===+ Journal of the Undying Overseer – Winter 161 +===
Now we just need to figure out what to do with a nigh-indestructible zombie giant.
===+ Journal of the Undying Overseer – Spring 162 +===
2nd Galena
A small arena, setup for two teams of combatants. And above it, a gallery for spectators to view the fight or archers to fire from a safe position. Since the Swamp Hunters have decided static targets are too dull to practice with, this should be a bit more engaging for them.
The first competitors are our slab-bearing zombie giant and a goblin swordsman that was captured in some invasion years ago. Interestingly, the goblin wears custom made steel armour rather than the usual scrap. He couldn’t have gotten that from the goblin pits. The only explanation is that he must be one of the necromancers’ living servants! Well goblin, what do you think now that you face your master’s handiwork? I’ll let you keep your equipment, but I don’t think it will avail you much.
A decent performance, but brute strength wins this day.
Given how easily I crushed that "nigh-indestructible giant" I imagine Nogood would have thought my performance exemplary since I didn't get hit once and cut it down with just an axe in a handful of blows. In hindsight I could have brought a mace or hammer and I would have crushed it even faster. Maybe with a bit more mess though.
Not as much as the current fighting in the arena is making at any rate. Its so bad that there's teeth up here in the gallery. A traitor at one point tried to climb through the arrow/viewing slits only to receive a lash to the back that sheered off a chunk of his torso and blood all of the fortification.
Future overseers please note: yes you can dump the prisoners in the method nogood set up years ago it does still work. The mass pitting system 2 floors above to dump all the prisoners if we need cages urgently or just want to enjoy the massacre.
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 1st of Sandstone 179Years ago I was kicked out of the Mountainhomes for two reasons: Objecting to the Queen's alliance with humans and elves, and consistently proving myself to be better than the upper class buffoons in whatever matters they thought they were best at. Since then I have been proven right: elves must be slain and are a species of backstabbers, and humans are unreliable.
Some humans trade with us well, others need executing.
At the very least, we know the monkeys in FrenzyEscort are aligned with goblins. They are enroaching on our borders and this cannot stand. I have given the order to march down there and make an example of any humans that dare go against us and if possible, obtain another piece of literature called "More Farm" which might help us get the tree farm functional again.
I wonder if there was a message line going from Frenzyescort to Sinewsabres and from there to the tower. Then when the hillocks west were founded in Nogood's reign they were cut off. At the very least, we can confirm that Sinewsabres and whoever was in
Castle Jeweldusks were both in league with one another.
scratchings out and a beer stain are on the pageI have not been having enough alcohol recently I've been so busy. Jeweldusks is the human Hamlet next to Sinewsabres, it was there that Mestthos and the others were found. The castle is Weightgleamed, and empty. Presumably overrun by the necromancers.
My point stands however; Jeweldusks was playing host to our prisoners. Weirdly though, there was nobody there at all, no guards or beasts or anything. Just our prisoners.
Clearly we either have an intruder, or the containment line against the goblins by fellow hillocks is not as tough as first thought.
One by one the Raptors have been processing paperwork asking for sanctuary and been getting it granted, citizenship sadly was revoked years ago and can only be restored after an a year's residence in the fort. Last but not least was Mestthos who patiently waited for everyone else to gain sanctuary first. I suspected he knew his case was going to be a tough one, and the fact we had reached our population max of 50 was another barrier to his entry.
He had a list of blemishes on his record
- Involved in attempted theft
- 1 count of disorderly conduct
- 2 counts of vandalism
- 1 count of disatrous leadership
- 1 possible count of corruption
That being said he has fought valiantly for Smallhands in the past and has clearly been feeling guilty about his capture. He has also set to work hauling and training with a crossbow.
I shall have him interrogated and look at the records from previous overseers
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 12th of Sandstone 179The more I peer into Mestthos, the more the puzzle comes into place.
Smallhands: Year 164
=Journal of Reg Pickcrab=[/b]
(definitely not 12000 bees in a trench coat)
Mestthos who is the mayor grabbed a sword and ran off the map, abandoning their office and bedroom. Perhaps it was not wise to send the mayor to do battle.
Mestthos clearly at one point or another agreed with Zolak and willingly joined the plot to infiltrate The Little Pick, our government. Nogood had Zolak arrested and interviewed, then disposed of. Kingzultan interviewed Mestthos who willingly admitted to plotting a theft.
4 years later, the filty undead elf Lapama came along at the behest of the still to this day unknown boss. Mestthos may have assisted in the corruption of Tholtig by providing information on how to threaten her.
Later that year Mestthos went off at speed to Sinewsabres to attack Ushrir since we had captured all the other necromancers.
A platinum flask shaped stain lines the page, it menaces with spikes of dwarven rumBy Armok I've got it all wrong! We had captured all the necromancers so Zolak came to free them. He sweet talked Mestthos into helping him by stealing The Waning Embraced Passage but then ended up slain. However Ushrir had somehow gotten the message that Mestthos didn't do the theft.
Ushrir then sent his other underling, Lapama to perform the same task a few years later. Stealing an artifact, in this case The Snarling Famine and threatened Tholtig to do so.
Noticing the repeated plot, Mestthos leapt at the chance to stop Ushrir, given the overseer at the time was actually a hive of bees and so passing it up the chain of command seemed pointless.
So either Mestthos was a traitor that failed and got punished...or he was performing counterespionage the entire time.
Lets see what Mestthos has to say
"Zully, was that it?" I asked Zultanking when I read the report.
"Yes. Since we already knew what he said, but nobody had ever realised." she replied.
"what do you mean?"
"The Snarling Famine was
made by Mestthos."
Both me and Zultanking needed a massive drink each after that. Blockadeidles military service was impressive with plenty of artifacts and battles won.
I gave him the stamp of approval. If anyone deserves to be a 51st citizen, its him.
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 22nd of Sandstone 179A dwarven ale stain is on the pageI swear I have had a tiny leak in my +Platinum flask+ for quite some time now. Looking back through the fort records the number of my entries with alcohol stains on them is as frustrating as it is a waste of good alcohol.
But, I have had ample cause to drink over the years and today is no exception. The military came back after fierce fighting with celebrations abound. Many goblins were slain and even names gained. However some of those titled soldiers were clearly not worthy as they got struck down by
farm animalsCaptain Nezclaw said that they were two of the most embarrassing deaths he had ever seen which is saying something. They left the goblins with heavy losses and more. So just ordinary slabs for them then.
He also mentioned that they left the town once goblin reinforcements showed up, and in vast numbers too. Estimating at least 50. I thanked him for the report and quickly made some emergency adjustments to the military to replace the losses. Everyone in steel, a new squad formed with me at the head and all the legendary fighters. Swamp hunters downgraded to 5 strength, the Siege breakers split into Fevered fighters and the unfevered remain as siege breakers.
New burrows designated for fighting too, and with that, time for a drink at the Tall Bar.
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 1st of Moonstone 179Recon lets loose a roaring laughter. Fell and Terrible!
So
THIS is your next play Weevilmessiah! Sending a broken army to batter themselves against my fortress! Your pitiful goblins shall avail you not!
Soldiers, arm up! Civies, get your arses inside the fortress! If they want in then it shall be across a path fallowed with their blood!
I had a grand view from the top of the Tall Bar. Its roiling wrath was filled and prepared to smother the goblins as I stood there at the levers. The mugma shone brighter than usual, or maybe it was my manical glee.
Elpho was also there at the windows, reciting a poem. Fescue was in the middle there telling a story. We were the only people in the Tall Bar.
then came the most enjoyable moment I ever had in this monument to dwarvenkind.
Pulling the lever that released the fire. It halted the tide of evil. The land turned into a mix of blood and ash as I made them melt and die.
From the depths of the land was this tower raised and by MY hand shall you perish beneath it!
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 28th of Sandstone 179After incinerating the goblin horde the entire army came out to mop up the occasional survivors. Even the raptors and Mestthos came out to assist.
Its taken us until today to clear out the rest of Smallhands' immediate area of living goblins.
There is a vertiable sea of molten metal and bone. Every last bit of sinew has been turned to ash. There were only 2 surviving goblins that got away, one left really early in the siege after it went off and shot a camel and the other got a leg chopped off and crawled off the hill.
I checked round the fort afterwards. Elpho was now socialising in the Tall Bar. Auze and Radiofort were both picking through one goblin to take its iron armour to the melting pool.
Speaking of melting pool, apparently there was still a leak on the Tall Bar's filling mechanism and main connector has melted again. The next overseer is going to need to look for some magma proof wood down in the caverns if we don't want to keep replacing it.
In other news Fikod upon witnessing the devastation while hauling...apparently had an excellent idea
this looks promising
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 7th of Opal 179This does not look promising
It ambushed Aban, a siege breaker at the gate. It went for the kill immediately biting onto Aban's head. Aban's steel helmet deflected the blow but unfortunately the werepig just knocked him over.
The wretched thing tore his leg off (the armour was made of bronze there) then started beating him to death with his own sock! When that didn't get through the rest of the steel armour, the boar simply punched his face in, latched on with its jaws and shook his head so hard his skull collapsed.
Even when on the ground though, Aban was fighting, punching the werepig hard enough to break a few fingers on its right hand and bruising its eye with his crossbow.
It then tossed him into some lava and he died quickly thankfully.
Rest in peace Aban, you died saving the mayor, Auze and Quarque.
2 siege breakers and 2 raptors then turned up. Thank goodness the raptors were still armed. Nezclaw promptly chopped off its hand and
Ast bit the werepig in the head! Onget then stabbed it in the lower spine and tore a motor nerve causing it to fall down. Then the already unfair fight got even more unfair when the Hammerer turned up, stabbed once with his spear and off came its head.
As it died it deformed back to its real self. An
ELF to be precise. Heathens!
Outraged at Aban's senseless death I ordered the corpse dumped in the magma and commissioned a coffin and a pair of statues for Aban valiantly defending the fortress from the pig and his part in assaulting Sinewsabres.
While this was going off, Fikod revealed his great work.
An adamantine artifact battleaxe. Who better than I to wield it?
Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 28th of Obsidean 179Its been one hell of a year.
A new years party wine stains the parchmentI had to abandon 2 of my goals. Wiping out the elves much to my frustration is an impossibility while some of them yet remain in Dimplesteal. Finishing the glass roof proved to be impractical in light of the haulage and training.
The creation of halls of the dead once again had to play second fiddle to the needs of the living. Yet I have still made progress and dug out the military halls. It is a pity but the next Overseer will have to see to the destruction of the goblin corpses on the surface via magma pit disposal. Hopefully they will be dumped in magma where they belong but I won't be surprised if they get mixed with our honourable dead again.
I got to wipe out an army personally, but once again another overseer is going to need to repair the Tall bar's pumping before resetting it. Mostly its the windmills. I don't think the pumps were damaged this time.
At least in spite of these failings I made grand achievements. Far from my detractors saying I bring nothing but misery and death, I brought adamantine forges and rescued long lost souls. Weapons and armour of mythical metal to protect our fortress and smite our enemies. I even found another vein in the depths and took every last piece out.
I crushed a siege without losing a single dwarf. A werepig was cut up as one would strips of bacon. I saved another soul from injustice for his part in the conspiracy years ago.
The arena was restarted, and as I write this the Swamp hunters are getting some live target practice.
It was to put it simply, another year to add to my growing legend. One primarily of kindness.
True kindness unlike previous overseers. Everyone learned new skills, accomdations were on the up, citizens rescued after nearly 20 years imprisoned, a swift death for the enemy and plenty of rubbish disposed of.
Kindness is a very powerful thing when used right.
A bit like adamantine really.
I can certainly drink to that.
------------
Marathon post since I couldn't work out how to split it.
for the next overseer: figure out a way to do something with those hives. Nesh is going bonkers over being unable to split them
The rescued raptors won't be able to change labours till they reach a certain period of time in the fort. They lost citizenship due to the length being away.
get the swamp hunters to shoot down those red wing blackbird men and women. they keep scaring the dwarves.
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Topic: Smallhands - nearly 40 years and still tiny! (Read 411661 times)